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The Darkness Within
FlashbacksTo A Hectic Time
Flashback
"Nobody understands!" shouted Rogue as she stomped down the hallway at the Xavier institute. Logan came running behind her, trying to get her to listen. He grabbed her wrist and she turned to face the wolf.
"Everybody except me!" he said calmly. She sighed and looked up at her father like figure. He saw the sadness in her eyes every time he looked at her. It made him angry to know she was suffering so much at her age.
"Ah know…but maybe that aint enough anymore." she said sadly. Logan sighed and put on hand on her face.
"It's always enough to know that at least one person is lookin' out for you, but you've got a whole mansion lookin' out fo' ya." he explained. Rogue smiled, but he knew she wasn't really taking it in.
"Ah don' know what ah'd b' without them, but ah jus'…ah jus' can' stand bein' 'ere anymore. Mah powers are getting' harder t' control, ah can' control this telekinesis and ah can' touch people." moaned Rogue.
"I know, and I can't imagine what you have to go through everyday, but you have us Rogue. You'll always have us…"
End Flashback
Logan gasped as he woke up from his dream. He dreamt of memories with Rogue, again. He really had to start getting over the fact that she was gone, dead. But she was such a big part of his life; she was like a daughter to him, though he didn't like to admit it to people.
And now she was gone forever, and he could have stopped her! That was the one of few regrets he had which would stay with him forever. He could have stayed with her, or convinced her, but it was out of his hands. He hated that.
"X Men, report to my office immediately." said Professor Xavier as he sent a telepathic message. Logan groaned, he was an early person, but he had hardly any sleep. He had hardly any sleep for the past 6 months Rogue had been gone.
As he took his shower, his memories went back to a time where he and Rogue first met…he thought she was a beautiful girl when he first saw her. Even though he didn't even want to her help her at first by driving off, her child like innocence made him come back for her…
Flashback
Logan was driving along the road, silence around him. He enjoyed silence, like he always says, it was golden.
"We can, do the impossible,
We can, the powers in our hands,
No we won't stop 'coz we got to make a difference in this life,
With one voice, one heart, two hands we can…"
Logan growled at the young hitch hiker turned the radio on full volume. He immediately turned it off, earning a annoyed look from the young teen Rogue.
"I'm not havin' none of that crap on in my car." he said. Rogue rolled her eyes and smiled.
"Come on Logan, ah bet ya are really a music person." she teased. This time, he rolled his eyes as he concentrated on the road.
"So, where do I drop you off?" he asked.
"Aw, an' here ah thought we were getting' along good." she said.
"What…did you actually expect me to take you with me everywhere?"
"Was ah wrong t' think that?"
"What gave you that impression in the first place!" he scoffed.
"'Coz ya came back fo' me an' ah have no where t' b' dropped off." she pointed out.
"You're not a very good hitch hiker are ya?" he asked.
"Well maybe ya can teach me how as we go t' wherever ya headin'." she said. He smiled to himself about how witty she was being. "Was that a smile?" He coughed and looked at her.
"I don't smile." he said. Rogue laughed.
"That's a yes in denial." He sighed.
"This is gonna be a long trip…"
"Luckily ya got me with ya." Logan laughed and drove off into the hills.
End flashback
Rogue was gone now, he had to remember that, but he would never able to let go of the fact that she was young with so much going for her, even if she didn't believe it herself.
Logan stepped out of the shower and started to get changed…
Bobby's Room
Bobby was already dressed in his grey X uniform. He stopped and stared at his draw, just staring at it. He sat down on the bed and opened the draw. He took out a picture and looked at it with pain.
The picture was of him and Rogue. She was covered up in a green top, only a little of her shoulders showing, and jeans. Her hair was tied back apart from her two white stripes which went down each side of her face. She was sat on Bobby's lap, laughing, while Bobby was smiling plainly. He had to admit, even though he loved her, he didn't enjoy not being able to kiss her. He wanted to end it with her, but he couldn't. It was because he couldn't stand her to be with anyone else, to see her with anyone else.
He didn't understand his feelings for Rogue, they were different than he expected. He wanted to be friends with her, yet he couldn't bear to see her with another man.
Flashback
His blue eyes watched angrily as his girlfriend talked to the wolf man. She looked happier with him than she was supposed to with her own boyfriend. He watched as she laughed and playfully punched him.
"Ya can b' such a tease sometimes Logan." he heard her say. Bobby watched as the wolf laughed very teasingly. He growled in jealousy. Wasn't she supposed to be his girlfriend? Yet there she was flirting with the man he knew she loved with all her heart.
She always jumped out of her seat when she heard him coming to give him a hug. She always defended him when no one else would, she always chose him over Bobby. His antagonism grew even more as her face grew serious at Logan. She hugged him…still was embracing him…why was she still clinging on to him..?
Bobby couldn't take it, he stepped out of his hiding place and went towards the two embracing mutants.
"Rogue?" he asked graciously like he didn't see anything, though his fury was spilling out. She gently pushed Logan away and looked at her boyfriend and smiled.
"Hey sugah." she said. Logan touched her shoulder and she turned to him.
"So I'll cya in a week then kid." he said. Rogue nodded sadly and hugged him. "Ya missing me already?" he joked. Rogue laughed.
"Nah." she said as she pulled away. Bobby closed his eyes, not wanting to ice Logan in the very spot. Rogue watched as Logan went out of the doorway and looked to Bobby. "Ya alright Bobby, ya gone red?" Bobby looked to her heatedly and grabbed her wrist. "Hey!" Bobby dragged her into a corner.
"What do you think you were doing!" he shouted. Rogue looked at him confused.
"What d'ya mean?" she asked. "What was ah doin'?" Bobby rolled his eyes.
"Oh come on Rogue, it's a bit obvious..." he said. "You have a thing for Logan." Rogue looked at him for a moment and looked to the floor. He laughed, knowing he got it right. "So I am right then."
"No…well…ah don' know." she said confused. She looked into Bobby's eyes which looked mad. "It's jus' ah don' know what he means t' me yet. We're very close an' ah was attracted t' him at first. Now…now ah don' know."
"How can you not know? I know you do, you cling on to him like ya never want to let him go!" he shouted. Rogue shushed him as people went past.
"Listen, Logan is very important t' me, but he's like a father t' me. Ah know nothin' between me an' him could ever happen. It's jus' plain wrong-."
"So you settled for the best next thing." he spat. Rogue smiled and put her gloved hands on his face.
"Ah settled fo' the best thang fo' me." she said. Rogue pulled him into her and held him close. "Ah love you…"
End Flashback
Bobby looked at the picture again. He didn't know whether to believe her or not. Through time, he knew she liked him as a brother or something like that. But it was hard for him to see her with him none the less. She liked to spend time with him, he knew that. But it didn't make it easier for him. And now, she was gone altogether, she'd never be in another man's arms, just the way he wanted it…except, it wasn't.
Sure he didn't like to see her with another guy, but he didn't like to know that she was dead too. That she could never have a life of her own. Bobby threw the picture into the wall in rage and looked to the floor.
He had to move on now, it was time. It had been six months and there had always been tension in the air with him and the other X Men. He couldn't accept the fact that she was dead. He'd wake up in the morning and still think she was alive.
"But she's not." he said to himself.
"Talking to yourself?" asked a faint voice. Bobby looked up to see Kitty Pryde, AKA Shadowcat. She had her brown hair tied up in a bobble and she also wore her X Men uniform. She was half phased though his door, and smiled as he saw her do the same.
"Just thinking aloud." he said. Kitty fully phased into his room and looked to the wall where he had thrown the picture. She picked it up to see a picture of him and Rogue, the glass was smashed all over.
"Why did you like, do this?" she asked. He sighed and looked to her.
"I couldn't look at it anymore, I gotta get over her." he said. "I can't keep thinkin' she's alive when she's not." Kitty smiled weakly and sat on the side of his bed next to him with the broken picture in her hand.
"I know what you like, mean. And I know you wanna move on, it's time you should move on. But," she handed him the picture, "It doesn't mean you have to forget the memories you had with her." Bobby looked at the picture again. They did have some good times together which meant a lot to him, and she was right, he didn't want to forget her altogether.
He smiled and put the picture into his draw and turned to Kitty, who in the last 6 months had grown a close relationship.
"Thanks." he said. She smiled and gave him a quick hug. They both stood up and headed for the door.
Jean and Scott's Room
Jean had been feeling very strange today. She felt that something was coming, something bad. She didn't know what it meant, but she just knew something was heading their way.
"Jean, you okay?" Scott asked as he came out of the bathroom. Jean snapped out of her daydream and turned to Scott and smiled sweetly.
"I'm fine, just thinking." she said. She got up and walked over to the man she loved and kissed him in the mouth lightly. He smiled and kissed her again, she let him have entrance to her mouth and their tongues battled each other as the deepened the kiss. Scott pulled away, much to Jean's unhappiness, and smiled.
"We gotta go to the Professor's office." said Scott. Jean nodded and sighed as he walked out of the door. He never paid attention to her as much now. She also noticed that he had been more over protective over the team. Ever since the Alkali Lake incident with Rogue, he never let them have a break. He always made them work harder to make sure there okay in a fight. And he also made them make sure they never tried to 'pull a stunt' like Rogue did.
She loved him, she really did, but sometimes she just wanted to take a break from him and have some fun. She never did that. Then there was Logan…
He liked Jean, she knew it. She didn't really know how she felt about him; she knew she was attracted to him but who wasn't? There was only one person she knew who was close to him and was attracted to him at first, Rogue.
Jean didn't know Rogue all to well. Maybe it was the fact that Logan liked her and not Rogue in the way she would have wanted him to, but she also knew that Rogue felt bonded to Logan as a father.
Jean had wanted to get to know the mutant, talk to her and see how she was. But Rogue would either ignore her or say she had to be somewhere. Why didn't Rogue like her if she saw Logan as a father? That was an answer Jean would never know. She was sad one of her team mates was dead, especially at such a young age, but Jean knew she did a brave thing for the right reasons. She was so brave, Jean wondered if she could ever do a thing like that.
She really wished she got to know Rogue when she had the opportunity. They only ever really talked once which didn't end really well…
Flashback
Jean was in the kitchen sitting on the stool, drinking some milk. She couldn't get to sleep with the concessive snoring of Scott Summers. The lights in the kitchen turned on suddenly and Jean saw a half asleep Rogue come into the room, rubbing her eyes.
Jean saw Rogue jump as she saw Jean sitting there. Jean smiled at the girl, but she didn't smile in return.
"Ah didn' know ya were down here." said the Southerner.
"I couldn't get to sleep." she said as she poured Rogue a drink. "And I'm guessing you couldn't too?" She passed Rogue the milk.
"Ah never can." she told her as she took a sip. "Too many thangs on mah mind."
"Well I learnt that talking is probably the best way of getting things out of the air…care to share some?" asked Jean politely. Rogue looked almost uncertain.
"Ah'll think ah'll pass. Ah know ya a doctor but ah rather talk t' someone ah trust." she said spitefully. Jean didn't know what to say, she didn't want to get on the wrong side of the Rogue, but there was no need for that.
"Do you think that was necessary?" asked Jean. Rogue turned to her.
"Do ah think what was necessary?"
"Saying that you don't trust me." Rogue looked to the floor.
"Ah didn' mean it like that." she said.
"Well there's only one way you can mean it." pointed out Jean. Rogue sighed and sat on the stool facing Jean.
"Ah jus' don' know you is all, plus ah'm tired." said Rogue.
"Yeah, but maybe you could trust me if you talked to me." Jean explained. "I try to talk to you but you just ignore me." It was true, Jean always did try to talk to her, but she never gave her the time of day.
"Ah do have thangs t' do though." Rogue said. "Ah don' mean t' give that impression." Jean rolled her eyes. "What, ya don' believe me?"
"I don't know, it's like you said, I don't trust you." said Jean giving a bit of her own medicine. Rogue gave her a dead eye.
"Look, ah don' know you an' you me, an' that's the way it is. We've been coping fine so why don' we jus' leave it at that." suggested Rogue.
"But I want to get to know you, you're a very nice person." she said. "Well that's what Logan's said."
"Logan said that?" asked Rogue as her face brightened up. Jean smiled and nodded. It went quiet for a moment.
"So do you like him?" she asked.
"No, an' even 'f ah did ah wouldn't tell you." said Rogue. Jean grinned.
"I know why you don't like me." she said.
"An' why's that?" Rogue asked.
"Because you want Logan all to yourself." said Jean. She didn't know why she was winding Rogue up, it wasn't supposed to happen this way. Rogue stood up from her stool and glared at her.
"'F ah had the right mind ah'd absorb ya ass right now." she said. Jean sighed, she knew shat she said was wrong. She watched as Rogue stormed out of the kitchen.
"Jean you are an idiot." she said to herself.
End Flashback
Maybe everything turned out how it was supposed to, maybe Rogue as supposed to die. Even though the two didn't really know each other, and not forgetting the fact that Rogue disliked her, Jean didn't want the Southerner to die like that. She was a good team member, and even though she wasn't to her, she was nice and kind to everyone else. And not forgetting her Southern charm, and feisty attitude.
Jean sort of missed the memorable catch fraises Rogue used to say when she was fighting an enemy in the Danger room. She missed the tension, even though she wished it wasn't there, between her and Rogue and she missed the X Men. When Rogue died, everything changed. The X Men were more careful and less care free. They didn't save lives to help mutant kind be accepted; now they did it because they had to.
They were meant to be heroes, now they were more like the granny X Men. Jean stood up and walked to the door. She wondered if things would ever go back to normal.
Professor Xavier's Office
"So what's this all about Professor?" asked the Russian mutant known as Piotr, or Colossus. Jean Grey watched as Wolverine came into the room, giving her an uncomfortable look.
"I sensed something last night, something that I can't take my mind off…I want you to go to Alkali island." said Xavier. Most of the X Men gasped, apart from Jean who had a feeling something like this would come to pass.
"But like, why?" asked Kitty. Cyclops stood up and crossed his arms.
"I think we can all agree Professor that there are memories there which we'd rather forget." said Cyclops. Jean put a hand on his shoulder.
"Let him finish Scott." she said. "He hasn't given us an explanation."
"Well, I have no suitable reasons. But I sense something strong, and for some reason, my mind keeps going to Alkali Island. I know this is a hard task for the loss we have had, but I assure you it was nothing to do with Rogue." Bobby's heart skipped a beat as he said her name. He was hoping that she as alive, but he had to remember he was moving on.
"Ya right, there's too many memories there, why should we go just go 'coz ya got a 'feeling' chuck?" asked Logan, not wanting to remember what happened.
"I know…and if you do not wish to go, then I shall ask Jean, Shadowcat and Colossus to go." said Xavier. "I'm sorry, but this could be important."
"I understand Professor." said Jean. She looked over to Wolverine was staring at her intently, she noticed a little look of desire too. She blinked, not wanting to get into that position and looked back to the Professor. "We'll get ready."
"Wait…" said Wolverine and Cyclops as the same time. The stared at each other like rivals and then both looked to the Professor.
"I'll go with them since I'm the leader." said Cyclops, really wanting to go with Jean. He couldn't let his love go on her own. Something dangerous might happen to her.
"I'll go too, they might need help if something goes wrong." said Wolverine.
"I think we can pretty much handle it." said Cyclops.
"Something tells me you aint." Cyclops growled but let it go as Jean once again put her hand on his shoulder, calming him down. It was Wolverine's turn to growl while Cyclops grinned as he held the woman Wolverine dreamed of.
"You can all go, just as long as you're careful." said Professor. "Storm, you should go too instead of Colossus and Shadowcat." The two young mutants frowned and looked dismayed.
"And why can't we go?" they both asked.
"We are X Men just like them, do we not have as much right as they do?" asked Colossus.
"Of course, but I don't want too many people going." Xavier reasoned. Shadowcat rolled her eyes and walked out of the room muttering to herself. Bobby followed. "Oh and I also want another team member going…but he appears to not have shown up…Storm, do you know where he is?" Storm grinned.
She had an idea of where he'd been last night, and the reason why he didn't bother coming this morning. Suddenly the doors opened, Wolverine growled at the site of him.
"Bonjour X Men, an' what a bon day it is." said the smiling Cajun known as Remy LeBeau. Cyclops rolled his eyes and went over to Remy.
"This is a school, not a 'hangover, come in what ever time ya like home for Cajuns'." said Cyclops as he brushed past him. "And, you're on the mission so get ready." Remy frowned, having a hangover was bad enough, but being in a plane with Scott Summers for a couple of hours was just pure torture.
He had only been here a month and was already getting bossed around by the one eye. Wasn't it enough that Gambit stopped thieving, but now he had to be ordered around like some little puppy? He had only been here a month and was already fed up with it. Not because he couldn't handle it, Remy just had a thing about being told what to do.
He loved the Danger room; he found it fun that a house had a little room which tried to kill you if you weren't good enough. He had already proven to a less than satisfied Logan that he was a good fighter, but Logan always pushed him harder and harder, trying to make him fail. Yet Gambit just kept defeating each level Logan gave him.
"Does Remy have t'?" he asked. Storm and Wolverine came up to him, both frowning.
"Remy, you joined the X Men because you wanted to help not because you had too. Live up to your reasons and put your gear on." she said as she followed Cyclops out of the door.
"What's wrong wit' 'er t'day mon ami?" he asked Wolverine. Wolverine growled and came up close to his face.
"I'm not your friend, got it Gumbo!" he shouted as he shoved past him out of the door.
"I get de feelin' fat der mad at Remy." he said, amused. Xavier smiled.
"They'll get used to you in time, they just don't like someone with a background like yours Remy." said the Professor.
"Besides, Scott's always like that, and Wolverine hates everybody." pointed out Jean.
'Except you an' Remy can see why.' Remy thought as he looked Jean up and down, admiring her posture.
"I heard that." said Jean affronted. Remy smiled and winked at her.
"You were meant too." he lied. Jean rolled her eyes and walked out of the door.
"You have to put a little bit more endeavour into getting on there good side though Remy." warned the Professor. Remy shrugged his shoulders.
"Remy's only been here fo' a mont' Prof, Remy's got abondance o' time t' get onto der good side." he said. Remy knew that if he put some effort into proving himself an X Man, he'd get the favour of the people that really mattered. He knew he could get on Ororo's side, Jean's and possibly Cyclops'. He knew Wolverine would never accept him, perhaps Kitty and Piotr, but he didn't really care about them or Iceman. Infact, he had a bad feeling about the 'ice cube'. Then, Remy remembered what he wanted to ask the Professor. It had been winding him up for some time now, because no one ever told him the story. "So, now we're on our own…"
"Yes Remy?"
"Remy wanted t' ask you a question which has been buggin' him fo' ages…who's dis Rogue Remy heard so much about?" Xavier put his head down and sighed.
"No one has told you…I'm not surprised, it was a dreadful time for all of us. She was a mutant who involuntarily absorbed the memories, physical strength, and, in the case of super-powered persons, abilities of anyone she touches…or touched." explained Xavier.
"Touched? Remy's sensing past tense here." he poitned out.
"Yes…Rogue died." he told him. Remy's eyes went a little wide open, he never thought any X Man had died. "She sacraficed herself for us and died. We never found her body."
"Dats gotta b' tough." Said Remy. "But she mus' o' had a tough life not being able t' touch an' all." Remy had heard about the mysterious Rogue from Kitty. She was complaining about Bobby and kept going on about some girl named Rogue and that she was gone now. Remy tried to ask Wolverine but he always ignored him, so he didn't ask again. It was until a couple of days ago he heard her name again.
Flashback
"No Scott, you can't keep doing this to them!" shouted Jean.
"She's right Cyclops, you're pushing them to the extreme." said Ororo. Remy stopped where he was on the hallway as he heard the two X Women shouting. He smiled to himself and went to the door which was a tiny bit open and put his ear to the wall.
"I'm doing it for their own safety!" Cyclops shouted back.
"Is working them everyday of every hour, not giving their bodies a rest for their own safety!" Jean pointed out. "You're working them too much Scott, not even we can handle it." Scott walked over to the desk and sat on the chair.
"I just don't want another incident…like what happened to Rogue." said Scott. Jean sighed and walked over to her boyfriend.
"I know hunny, but what she did was her own choice, and if she didn't we wouldn't be here." Jean said.
"I'm sure Rogue wouldn't have wanted you to be upset Scott, but it wasn't her fighting that put her in that position, it was her will." explained Ororo Scott nodded and sighed.
"I just wanted to make sure the X Men would always be here, as a family." said Scott. "With Rogue gone, it's different now."
"Hey what ya doin'?" asked Kitty as she popped behind Remy. Remy jumped out of his skin and fell onto the door. He lied flight while an angry looking Scott and Ororo looked down at him.
"Eavesdropping were we?" she asked. Remy grinned.
End Flashback
"She did, she called her powers a curse…she was such a spirited young character though, and a credit to the team. She and Logan were extremely close. And as far as I know, she and Bobby were dating."
"Icecube had a girlfriend? Here I t'ought he hadn't quite yet hit puberty." Xavier forgot that comment and moved on.
"She died at Alkali Lake which is where you are headed. That's why some of the X Men are a bit distressed by going." explained Xavier.
"What, she been raised from de dead?" asked Remy.
"No, I just sense something there." Remy nodded and went for the door. "Oh and Remy…" Remy turned back to the Professor. "Don't be causing any dilemma." Remy grinned and walked out of the room. Xavier sighed again.
He remembered so much of Rogue, and even though they weren't close like he was with Jean, Scott and Storm, he still knew so much about her. He knew her struggle and what she thought of herself…
Flashback
The Professor had his two hands at each side of Rogue's temple. Her eyes were screwed up and her face looked as though she was struggling.
"Ah can'…" she whispered.
"You can Rogue, have faith in yourself." he told her. Rogue shook her had side to side. "Come on Rogue, stayed focused."
"Ah can'!" she shouted. She pulled away and looked at the Professor. He sighed; she stood up and walked to the window angrily. She looked outside and sighed. "Ah'm sorry Professor, but ah can' do this anymore, it's too much fo' me."
"No Rogue, I know it's hard, but you're a strong woman, and I know you can do this if you really try and put your mind to it." he told her honestly. She smiled weakly and then frowned.
"It's bad enough ah'm gettin' new powers, an' ah still gotta deal with the no touching thang." said Rogue sadly.
"We'll one day make you be able to touch." the Professor promised.
"No, ah know that aint true…mah powers are a curse". she spat. Xavier looked at her, pitying her. He knew she was going through a hard time in her life, facing the reality that she might not able to touch. But he knew that with someone as strong willed as she was, she could gain control and live her life freely.
"Don't say that Rogue, have more conviction in yourself." he told her. "We all have faith in you."
"How can you have faith in me when ah have no faith fo' me, or the other people struggling with their powers!" shouted Rogue. "Face it Professor, ah'll never be like you other mutants."
"Yes, you should be proud to be an individual." he told her obstinate, not letting her loose her own reliance in herself. Rogue turned to him irritably.
"What, ah should b' proud that with one touch ah could kill a human being, with one touch ah could destroy a family or their whole lives!" she shouted. "Ya jus' don' get it Professor, 'coz ya don' understand. Ya have all ya other X Men who have there unique powers, an' then there's me, who isn't like you X Men in anyway. Ah'm not a human, ah'm not an ordinary mutant, ah'm a monster!"
With that, she stomped out of the room. Xavier felt bad for the girl, he felt that he could do something more. Her powers were strong and were getting more powerful. He had to get through to her soon, or else she could risk not only her life, but the lives of others.
End Flashback
Xavier put his hand on his head. He never did help her after he devoted himself to help the young mutant. He had so many things to do, and even though he knew she was struggling, he couldn't do anything about it. There was the whole Stryker situation, and then it was too late as she sacrificed herself.
Indeed she was a great woman, yet a troubled mind within. She had no escape at all, she didn't want to die, but she didn't ant to live the way she had been living. What a perfect way to go out, saving the ones she loved the most, and escaping from the world she could never touch or never feel. It just showed that people took the world for granted. But Rogue was one of the few that had to see the world for what it was, a glorious palace that had been mistreated. He only wished more people learnt from the moral of Rogue's death. She didn't know it, but she had created a story, which Xavier could use to make people see the world for what it was.
Little did he know, that the beautiful world Rogue loved and left, would, in her eyes, be lighted in flames and the screams of the people she cared about the most…
Sooooooooooo how did you like it? I really hope you enjoyed it as much as I loved writing it! I know that Remy could have been a non member of the X Men, but then the whole story I'm writing in my head wouldn't come together. Even though he didn't have a big entrance here (since he had a hangover), he will have a big entrance into the main person of the story, Rogue.
Please REVIEW:-)
Next Chapter – Okay this one DOES have Rogue in it! With her powers going crazy, she needs serious help. Dazzler and Emma go to find her, only to realise they are powerless to stop anything. Who will meet the wrath of Rogue?
