Angel: The whole time, I was thinking about the first Danny Phantom episode since that has the same episode title as this one XD I think it's just a coincidence, though.

The bell rings at Amy and April's school for lunch. The students trudge down the hall, a bunch of meat on a trough...for pigs. "Enjoy your Sloppy Joseph," Draxum grins proudly behind the glass. Two students groan when April pushes past them.

"Baron Draxum, we have a code red!" She exclaims at him. Amy slides next to her, holding her niece in her arms. Elena has her arms wrapped around Amy's neck.

"Ah bup, bup, bup," He holds up a hand. "I'm dealing with a situation, O'Neil. And who is that?" He points to the little girl.

"I brought Elena with me today since her mom's babysitter is sick. It was either that or letting Leo watch her," She has a deadpan look on her face. "Her school had a half day, and her mother couldn't get off her shift."

"I'm thirsty," Elena murmurs to Amy, who gives her a juice box.

"Dale, pick up that napkin!" Draxum points to Dale, the same one from the homecoming dance.

"It's not mine," Dale looks away.

Everyone around gasps at this, dropping their food. Draxum's eyes glow orange as a purple vine grows from the floor. It grabs Dale's leg and drags him to the napkin. He actually starts crying a little bit, fearful of what the 'cafeteria worker' would do to him.

"Okay, okay! Mommy!" He cries while picking up a napkin. He reaches towards the waste basket, but a purple vine slaps his hand.

"Recycling!" Dale puts it into the recycling bin, running away out of fear.

"...Yeah, you're not attending this school," Amy tells Elena after a few seconds.

"Draxum, you promised not to use your yokai powers in front of people," April cringes, looking away.

"But it makes things so much more efficient!" Draxum looks away. "Why shouldn't I?"

"Are you serious?" Amy asks him, cradling Elena's head while carrying her.

"I'm sending this to Leo," April snaps a picture of them, finding them cute.

"You will not-"

"And send," April sends it anyway, causing Amy to groan. "And you shouldn't use yokai powers because of this letter I found in your mailbox!" She holds up a letter.

"Ah, my mailbox. What is a mailbox?" He takes the letter, putting on his glasses.

"It's where you store your mail. By the way, stop sending your unwanted mail to my place, I'm not paying for your streaming subscriptions," Amy rolls her eyes.

"The Lunch Lady Association is honored to declare Baron Draxum the new Chairperson of the Month for his excellent lunch roomery?!" His mouth opens in shock.

"And the Superintendent of Lunch Rooms, Vivian Slopworth, is coming today to present your award!" April informs him.

"If they see the conditions the cafeteria is in, they can take that award away!" Amy adds in.

"This is marvelous!" Draxum smiles, removing his glasses. "It's about time the human worms should award Baron Draxum the respect he commands!"

Amy rolls her eyes as Elena looks up at her. "Why is he so narcissistic?" The brunette lets out a laugh as Draxum glares slightly. Elena just smiles innocently, even though she meant it. "I learned that word in school today!"

April grabs his collar, pulling him forward. "No, this is bad!" April reminds him. "Do you wanna blow your cover? Because that is gonna happen if Slopworth sees how you run things!"

"What is wrong with how I run things?" Draxum asks cluelessly.

"Uh, hello? Have you seen the students and this place?" Amy gestures to everything around them. "You're having them eat from a trough. For pigs. Like slop. This is why I make my own lunches..."


They're standing in the cafeteria, which looks really run down and unsanitary. "I find this warm-moist ecosystem really keeps the bolognas soft."

"Uhh..." It honestly looked like fungus growing as mutant silverfish are handling the...food.

"...Ew," Elena comments after a few seconds, Amy biting back a laugh.

"Oh boy. If Big Boss sees this mystic stuff, you're out of here!" April pulls out her phone. "We need help."

"I wouldn't count on Leo or Donnie, then," Amy speaks up, moving Elena's hand away from something that does not look edible for anyone. Let alone a mutant. April calls Mikey on her phone.

"Mikey, we have a code double red," She holds up the phone so that he can see everyone. He seems to be driving on the streets of New York. "The Superintendent of Lunch Rooms is coming to tour Draxum's kitchen!"

"I can't hear you, April, I'm saving New York!" He hollers to her, waving to the little girl. "Hi Elena! Your aunt's told me all about you. I'm Mikey."

"Hi Mikey," She giggles, waving back. So far, she's only met Leo out of the turtles, as there hasn't been a proper time for them to meet. Just like with April's parents...however, Raph is behind Mikey, driving a go-cart behind his brother.

"It looks like you're go-carting?" April gives him an accusing look.

"I'm not go-carting and I still can't hear you!" Raph bumps into him and he hangs up.

"Yeah, he's go-carting," Amy deadpans in annoyance. "I guess that means we can't rely on those two either."

Elena blows a raspberry in response and the brunette smiles at her proudly. "Yeah, my friends are sometimes dumbbells, aren't they?"

"Okay, we have got to clean this up before Slopworth gets here," April speaks up, Draxum looking at his tiny mirror.

"You mean her?" He points to footage of the cafeteria, where a woman in a business suit and short brown hair is already marking things from a clipboard.

"Oh boy! Okay, look, Draxy, you keep her busy and we'll take care of...this whole situation!" April gestures to the cafeteria.

"Got it," He walks away, the girls staring at a silverfish.

"You! Quit stirring that pot of mystery meat and get rid of anything in here that's still alive!" April orders the silverfish. "You, get a bucket of suds and start making this place spotless!"

He protests to her. "I don't care how long you've been working here. We're vertebrates, so we're in charge!" They scamper away and Elena looks up at Amy.

"That means we have spines, right?"

"Yup," Amy answers her, putting the girl down. "Don't touch anything that's alive or that looks like it's not clean." She pulls out two sponges and tapes them to Elena's feet.

April takes a cleaver and slices the vines away.


Most students look unhappy as they eat. "Welcome to the Caf, your Excellency," Draxum states to Vivian as they're walking around.

"Delighted. I was very impressed by how low your costs are," She glances at him. "How do you run this entire place by yourself?"

He looks away proudly. "Draxum prides himself on efficiency." Vivian looks past him to see students taking food from the trough. She gasps sharply at the sight.

"You have children eat from a trough?" Her eyes go wide.

"Uhh..." His eyes widen in alarm as he forgot about that. He might've gone a bit too far with that one...

"That's exactly what I suggested on my first day!" She smiles in amazement. "No one listened! They'll burn their hands, they all said!"

Draxum chuckles, patting a student on the head. "The weaker ones do, but we're trying to help the herd..."

"Now let's see what you've done to the kitchen!" She announces, making him nervous.

"T-The kitchen?"

The silverfish are carrying a bunch of cleaning supplies as they start scrubbing everything so that it shines. Although spraying the oven with spray set it on fire for a bit...Elena giggles as she and Amy skate together with sponges on their feet, cleaning the floor so that it's a sparkly shine. April is storing away potions and other mystic stuff. She opens the cabinets, a deadpan look on the mystic creatures inside. She'll never know just how exactly he thought he could keep this appearance up...

She knocks away a tentacle with a bat, but it bumps into an oozesquito that was inside. The jar is forcefully open and the bug crawls out.

The two silverfish give a thumbs up. "Time to enter the kitchen after a gentle push of this unlocked swinging door!" Draxum calls out to alert them. April is caught in the tentacle. Amy runs over and tries to pull her friend out. "April!" He slowly opens the door, and April lets out a yell, getting the tentacle out the door. It lands in the dumpster outside and she sweeps her hands in annoyance.

"Mm, mm! These nuggets are delicious! Mm!" Vivian hums as the duo walk inside the now-clean kitchen. She was eating a chicken nugget.

"Right? Why use convoluted chicken when there are dozens of birds out by the trash?" The tentacle grabs a pigeon. Amy shakes a bit in disgust, sticking out her tongue. "Anywho, these are my unpaid interns, April, Amelia, and Amelia's niece Elena. Cha-ching!"

The three gasps as they see an oozesquito on Vivian's shoulder. Elena tugs on Amy's skirt to whisper. "What is that?"

"I'll tell you later," Amy scoops her up and moves away from it.

"Superintendent Slopworth!" April frantically waves her hands. "I-I've heard so much about you in the last...ten minutes!"

Draxum shooes away the bug, placing it on a spatula while April adverts the woman's eyes away. "I'm a big fan of the Cafeteria Arts!"

"Call me Viv," She smiles at them. "I hope you'll join us for Barry's banquet tonight."

The four just give innocent looks as Draxum places the bug inside the mystery meat pot. "Banquet? What a perfect way for my subjects-I mean, colleagues, to kneel at my feet!"

The oozesquito lands on the meat and mutates it. It turns green inside.

"I thought we'd have it right here in your cafeteria." The four gasp at each other. "I've invited every lunch lady in the district."

They turn to her nervously. "Really? Here?" April points to the ground. The pot begins to glow from the inside, Amy's eyes going wide.

"Oh no..."

The meat starts to mutate, becoming alive as it turns into various animals. "What better place than the finest cafeteria in the whole district?" Vivian asks, gesturing to the kitchen. April catches the pot, and it jumps around with her still holding onto it. Elena blinks at the sight.

"Isn't wrestling with a pot your thing, Auntie Ali?"

"Yeah...her doing it just feels a bit weird," Amy comments slowly.

"You have a great point. I am the best!" Draxum goes over to Vivian, both Amy and Elena facepalming. "Would you like to see how I organize the sporks, Viv?" He spins her around, leading her away.

"You have a sporks system?" She asks in awe. The pot falls out of April's hands, spraying her with meat. She sticks to the fridge, both Elena and Amy gagging. The meat forms into a little person with a fish bone stuck to the back of its head, laughing. April slams the pot over it.

"Gotcha! Hm," She smirks proudly, but then it starts moving around on its own. It knocks April around the floor, the two girls jumping over it when she passes them. "Ahh!" She screams, the two running after her, but they slip from the broth.

"Oh, gross!" Amy looks at her stained clothes and April crashes into the cleaning supplies.

The meat is now free as it slithers around the floor, the girls following after it. April slips first, knocking the two girls over her. The mutated meat looks up ahead to see a banana lying there. April gasps as it starts to move.

"Get back here, you sloppy goblin!" April declares as she and Amy tackle it. They fight it off, or at least try to, when a horn beeps a catchy tune. Mikey crashes into the hall, flying over them.

"Ha ha!" He snatches the meat. "Gotcha! Hot soup, baby!" Then he slams it into an open locker, closing it. He takes off his helmet to reveal a black, slick wig that makes him look like Elvis. "Problem solved!"

Amy stands up slowly as Elena runs over to them. "Cool!" She beams up at him and he pats her on the head.

"I thought you were saving the city?" April uses quotation marks at the last three words.

"Otherwise known as slacking off," Amy deadpans, hands on her hips.

"And you were my next stop," He tells them, all three girls rolling their eyes at him. "Now, what's this about the Superintendent checking up on Draxum?"

The meat inside sees a sandwich inside someone's backpack, laughing evilly.

"O'Neil! Other humans!" Draxum approaches the group. "What is the status?"

"The nerve!" Amy shouts, confusing him.

"Draxum," April starts off in a warning tone, just as mad as Amy is right now. "Why was there an oozesquito in your kitchen?!"

"Well, I don't know," He looks away innocently. The four just glare at him, waiting for an answer. "Okay, I was going to turn that Dale kid into a cantaloupe mutant!" He reveals, causing Amy to gasp. "His bald head. Come on, it looks just like one!"

"More like a coconut," Elena adds in.

"You were going to do what?!" Amy screeches at him. "Unbelievable! Even after you decided to tolerate humans, you were gonna turn an innocent kid into a mutant?! What is wrong with you? Don't you know what oozesquitoes do since you created them?!"

"I wouldn't call Dale exactly innocent," April whispers to Amy, who rubs her chin.

"You know, that's actually a good point. But still, the right thing to do with the bug would've been to keep it anywhere else than in public!" She points up at Draxum. "Bad former warrior scientist! Bad!"

"Cause you couldn't give up your mystic stuff, there's now a mutant inside that locker!" April yells, the meat growing bigger because of the food.

"I got you a swankable apartment, and this sweet job, and you're risking it all to play with oozesquitoes?! Are you trying to get thrown into the Hidden City prison, huh?!" Mikey exclaims at him. The Hidden City Police are still looking for him, but so far, they haven't found him. However, if word gets out that he's here, he'll get sent to prison...

"No..." Draxum says reluctantly, the meat bursting out of the locker. Amy pulls Elena out of the way. The meat is now wearing a jersey as it slips past them. Draxum lands roughly on the ground. He stands up, ready to use his mystic powers on it.

"Draxum!" The three teenagers shout, but it's too late as the vines shoot out of Draxum's hand. He attempts to grab the mutant meat, but a student opens a door nearby. "NO!" Both the vines and the meat immediately go away as it's just Dale carrying a bunch of books. He slips from the grease and falls onto the ground.

"Please, please stop the mystic stuff," Mikey scolds Draxum, crossing his arms. "You almost blew your cover again!"

"And if that happens, who knows when you're gonna find another job?" Amy places a hand on her hip. "Or even another place to live?"

"Well, he could always work for you," April points at her.

"Yeah, there's no way that's happening," Amy deadpans at this, an annoyed look on her face. She'd rather not, and while she may be on...somewhat good terms with Draxum, she will never give him a job at her bakery.

He turns around to them. "But we have to stop him! I'm about to receive the Lunchroom of the Month Award, which I can only assume is the highest human honor!"

"That's a Nobel Prize," Elena tells him.

"Then this will be the first step to getting one!"

"Where did you go, Barry?" Vivian calls out down the hall.

"He must not ruin it for me!" He gives them a pleading look.

"You have done enough," April puts her finger at his nose. She joins Mikey in his go-cart. Amy summons her bike with her remote, pressing another button to create a kid-sized seat on the left side for Elena. She puts her niece inside and sits down on her bike. "Keep the superintendent busy, and we'll go deal with Sloppy Joseph!"

"Wheeee!" Elena cheers as Amy takes off after her friends.

Sloppy Joseph pulls up a table, which has gum all over the back. He licks it all off, the two vehicles appearing in the doorway.

"NO!" April jumps out of the car and lunges for the meat mutant. Amy leaps out of the bike, rushing towards them. Because of the grease all over it, April slips off the meat, landing against the wall. Amy frontflips and jumps, grabbing the meat. But she slips right off and hits the ground with a thump.

"Ow..."

Sloppy Joseph sees some coffee and donuts, eating them whole. April sits up, covered in meat and grease. "When he eats, he grows...?"

"Come to think of it, he does seem bigger than before," Amy rubs her chin. His stomach expands and their eyes widen.

"When he eats, he grows!" They exclaim at the same time.


Draxum basks in the glory of the other lunch ladies clapping for him. "Ha ha! Yes!" He shows off, flexing his muscles. He blows a few kisses to the crowd as the cafeteria is decorated for the banquet.

"Take a look at that, Barry!" Vivian gets his attention and he turns around, gasping sharply. Right in front of him is a statue made of fish sticks.

"A statue of me made of fish sticks...?" He asks slowly. "In my previous life, naturally I assumed they'd build statues in my honor." His eyes go misty eyed. "But even I never imagined such...beautiful breading..." He actually starts crying.

Meanwhile, Sloppy Joseph is charging down the hall, Amy and Mikey going after it on their rides. The grease, however, makes the wheels slippery.

"Oh...oh no," Mikey frowns at the floor. The vehicles slip and they end up crashing. Thankfully for Amy, Elena was wearing a helmet. "Oh man," Mikey complains as they stand up. He's holding the wheel from his go-cart as Amy looks at the grease on her.

"Ohh man, all this is gonna leave a lot of stains..."

"Mikey! Amy! He's after the sugar machine!" April points ahead as Sloppy Joseph eats everything from it whole. He also swallows the machine itself, growing even bigger, to their shock. It grows so big that it fills the hallway. It turns around and screeches at them. They hug themselves, screaming as it looms over them.

"Okay, this isn't going as planned..."

"You think?! How are we supposed to stop this thing?" Amy asks in shock as she looks up at it. Suddenly Sloppy Joseph sniffs something...more food. And it's coming from the banquet. It rolls over to the double doors.

"What?" Mikey asks in confusion.

"Guys, it's headed for the banquet!" Amy's eyes widen in realization.

"Lunch ladies and lunch gentlemen," Vivian announces to the crowd. "This room says it all. The best managed cafeteria in the district!" She holds the award in her hands. "I proudly present the Golden Net to Lunchperson of the Month, Baron Draxum!"

She gives it to him and he chuckles proudly as they clap. "Thank you. I humbly accept this totem of your internal worship. As the greatest among you, I-"

Sloppy Joseph storms into the room, breaking through the wall. "My lowly lunch subjects! Remain calm!" Draxum announces to the three. "There's a simply human explanation for this harmless-" Sloppy Joseph then eats the fish stick statue. "My statue! This monster must be SLAYED!"

Sloppy Joseph looms over the three, and they scream. Draxum stands in front of the three, his powers ready. April, Amy, Elena, and Mikey appear on stage behind him.

"Barry, no mystic stuff!" Mikey calls out.

"What?" He asks, baffled as he looks over his shoulder.

"No, no, no," Mikey crosses his arms.

"Explainable common beast!"

"Really?" Amy facepalms at this. Could he be any more obvious?

"As lord of the lunchroom, I command you to stand down!" He looks over to Mikey, who gives him a thumbs up. Sloppy Joseph slams into them and grabs everyone into his hands. Then he swallows them whole. Draxum looks up to see Elena and Vivian getting pulled away.

"My hair!"

"Auntie Ali!" Elena cries out.

"No!"

"Your Excellency! And...that little girl..." Draxum glances away, unable to remember her name right now. Both of them start to get squished. "NO!" His vines from his pocket act on instinct, spreading out through the meat.

"Draxum!" April calls out nearby. "What are you doing?!"

"Fine, no mystic stuff," He agrees out of defeat, the meat knocking him out of the mouth, along with other pieces of meat. Draxum lands in the kitchen, falling to the ground. He looks up, unsure. "What am I gonna do?" He gasps as he sees some ketchup, ladles, and an apron that says 'hang in there, human baby!'

"Sloppy Joseph!" He closes his eyes. "You're about to get served!"

He hits two boxes of buns, and they open. They land all over as he lands on the top of a table. "Come and get it, lunch meat!" He reveals two ketchup cannons in his hands. The mutant meat screeches at him and Draxum yells, leaping forward.

"Infinity sauce cannon!" Draxum fires the ketchup at it. "Battle Nexus of Justice!" He holds the two ladles, swinging away grease. He runs up to the meat, jumping onto it. He smacks it against the face twice, doing it again underneath the chin. The meat lands on all of the buns. Draxum keeps hacking at it, the meat landing on the walls. A hand emerges from the pile of meat. Draxum grabs it and pulls everyone out. They land in various spots, the award landing on a table. Vivian lands on the other end, and the object goes flying. Draxum catches it as the meat is now back to its tiny little self. He yells as he flies towards it, smacking it to bits with the award.

Vivian encases it into a chest. "I'm revoking your award, Draxum!" She declares angrily.

"As you wish...your Excellency," He tears up as she storms off.

"Auntie Ali!" Elena runs up to Amy, who bends down and hugs her.

"Elena!" She smiles in relief that she's not hurt. She looks up at the sad former warrior scientist, walking up to him while holding the girl. "Thank you for saving my niece."

"Can Barry babysit me one day?" Elena asks her, the brunette's eyes going wide.

"Nope, no way, let's get you home," She says quickly, walking towards the double doors. Hopefully her bike wasn't too bad in damages...

"Don't worry, Barry," The male of the lunch people places a hand on his shoulder. "We've all had to deal with an occasional meat problem."

"Last week, one of my chalupas took out the entire debate team," A woman tells him.

"The point is, you're one of us now. And what happens in the lunch room stays in the lunch room," The other female winks at him.

Draxum smiles at their understanding and later cleans up the cafeteria, sometimes using his mystic powers in the process. He wipes off his forehead and turns off the lights. He meets with the three teenagers back in the kitchen once he's done.

He yawns and smiles proudly at the clean kitchen. "You lucked out this time, Barry," April looks away.

"From now on, no more mystic stuff. Promise me that!" Mikey points to him threateningly.

"That means no more oozesquitoes, no mutating students, and no mystic powers in school!" Amy counts off. "Because if not, this kind of stuff can happen again!"

He turns around, putting a hand to his heart. "I promise on my fish stick statue," He gestures to a make-shift statue that he made.

"Okay," All of them say as they leave. Draxum replaces the statue with a baby Sloppy Joseph. He holds up a burger. "Hungry, buddy?" The meat baby coos as it reaches out, Draxum actually blushing. "Yes you are." He then realizes the size of the burger, holding up a piece of celery instead. "Better not overdo it."

The mutant baby pouts at this.


The next day, Elena is over at Amy's place for the weekend. Leo and Amy are sitting on the couch, watching her use her dolls. Chewbacon is sniffing the girl, causing her to giggle.

"Chewbacon!" She pats him on the head. Leo glances at her before turning to Amy, casually leaning against the couch.

"You know, this could be good practice for us being parents."

Her eyes widen as she blushes, clearing her throat. "April sent you the picture, didn't she? I'm gonna let her have it the next time I see her...but we're still young."

"I know, but come on," He pouts, leaning in eagerly with shining eyes. "Don't you see it? Me raking in the money, you being a stay-at-home mom-"

"Wouldn't it be the other way around?" She raises a brow in amusement.

"No, see, 'cause as the face man, I'd run the bakery," Leo gestures to himself with an amused smile. Amy rolls her eyes at him. "What? I could run it!"

"Yeah, run it right to the ground," Amy mutters loud enough for everyone to hear. He pouts as he can hear Elena laughing. "No, here's how I see it. You'd be the stay-at-home parent, and I'd be the one working."

"Oh, so you do think about our future?" Leo asks teasingly and she pushes him away slightly.

"We're not getting into that conversation again until we're good and ready," Amy huffs, looking away.

"Auntie Ali, can I have a snack?" Elena looks up and Amy stands up. Leo joins her side as she reaches the kitchen.

"Why does she call you that, anyway?" He whispers into her ear.

"She's too young to really know the extent of it," Amy whispers back, looking through a cabinet. "She was only a baby when I changed my name from Alina to Amelia. I can't exactly tell her why I would ask her to call me Amy instead. She'll learn when she's older," She shrugs a little bit.

"I thought she knew about your whole...you know," Leo gestures to the brunette as she glances up at him, holding a cup of milk.

"No, she only knows that my mom doesn't remember me. No one wants to tell a 5-year-old that a mother hits her child just because she thinks of them as a stranger," She gives him a warning look. "And that goes for you too, I don't know what it'll do to her if she finds out."

"Okay," He holds up his hands in defense, watching Amy hand Elena the milk and some animal crackers.

"Leo, give Auntie Ali a big kiss on the lips!" Elena points at Amy, who flinches.

"Elena!"

"You know you wanna kiss him!" Elena smiles innocently.

"That's it," Amy picks her up and puts her on the couch, tickling the girl. The little girl giggles, wiggling around. Leo just grins at the two.