Chapter 25
Countless dilapidated buildings pass by in a blur as my feet hit the pavement one after the other. The sun beats down and I round a corner only to be met with another row of abandoned structures. My t-shirt clings to the sweat on my back, my breathing is heavy and I could use a drink of water, but I push forward. After meeting with Max, I tried to distract myself by watching the backlog of Dauntless born simulation footage I haven't gotten through yet but I was too distracted to focus. I needed to get out of there.
Running isn't typically my cardio of choice, but I didn't think my knuckles could handle another round with the heavy bag. Besides, leaving the compound was the only way to ensure no one would bother me.
What are Jeanine and Max thinking? Do they honestly believe all of the factions will side with them after they pull a move like this behind everyone's backs? Or could the leaders of other factions already be aware of what is going on? Max never said one way or the other but I can't imagine Amity would condone this level of violence and I'm fairly certain Candor believe they should be the ones running the government, so I highly doubt either of them know what's in the works.
Will this attack on Abnegation result in Amity and Candor declaring war on Erudite and Dauntless? What will happen when Jeanine and Max cut off the factionless from supplies? Will they somehow rise up? There are too many unknowns for someone as intelligent and rational as Jeanine to have overlooked. So how is she planning to deal with the fallout? How is she expecting to get them on board?
Unless she doesn't care whether or not they're on board. Could she be intending to control them the same way she plans to control her Dauntless army? Could she really have figured out a way to take away the free will of an entire city? No, that has to be impossible.
I slow down and catch my breath. I've run farther than I realized. I take in my surroundings, one derelict structure after another. The everlasting consequence of a long finished war. Is this what the future holds for our factions?
I always thought the biggest decision of my life would be ignoring my aptitude test results and choosing Dauntless in order to start a new life. How did that decision lead me to making a choice between following orders that could start a full blown war or going against my faction leaders and becoming a faction traitor?
It almost feels like I'm in a fear simulation. When I was young, my mother's mental instability made for a very chaotic upbringing. The lack of consistency in my Erudite life lead me to crave control. The first time I took control of my life was choosing to leave my birth faction. After that, I was able to take the reins and make all of my own decisions.
Do I follow my leaders? Yes, but I do so because I choose to, because up until this point I agreed with their views, not because I'm scared not to. To this day, I fear losing that control. I fear the unknown and the chaos it can bring.
The problem is, no matter what choice I make right now, the unknown is unavoidable. Whether I choose to go along with faction war or I choose to try to stop it, the life that I've built for myself will no longer exist.
I continue running, this time towards my faction rather than away from it. As much as I'd like to avoid dealing with all of this, the end of initiation is quickly approaching and my decision can't wait.
The journey back to the compound feels unexpectedly short considering how far I ran. Part of me hoped the fresh air would hold the answers to my problems but I still don't know what my next steps will be.
What I do know is that I refuse to take part in a war that will tear my city apart.
The cold water offers my body relief but my mind refuses to quiet. I know I need to figure out a way to stop this, but how is one person supposed to stop the plans of two factions?
Is there anyone I can trust to help me?
The obvious answer is the Abnegation transfer who has been occupying all of my thoughts lately, but involving Tris seems unfair to her. She's dealing with so much already. Will she be able to handle this on top of it all?
There's only one other person I can think of who would be unquestionably against Jeanine and Max's war plans.
Tobias fucking Eaton.
I let out a frustrated groan at the thought. With his Abnegation roots and his continuous criticism of the new initiation process there's no way he would tolerate what Jeanine and Max are planning. Plus, as much as I hate to admit it, he is intelligent and capable. Between the three of us maybe we could figure something out.
Fantastic, just fantastic…joining forces with two Stiffs in order to stop my city from being destroyed. What has my life become?
I rotate the knob, turning off the shower, then reach for my towel. After using it to dry off, I tie it around my waist and pad out of the bathroom towards my wardrobe.
On the way, I hear the familiar ding signifying a new video message on my tablet and make a beeline for my side table.
New video message from the office of Jeanine Matthews.
This can't be good. Jeanine never contacts me through my public tablet. I swipe the notification and Jeanine's assistant comes into view.
"Mr. Coulter, Ms. Matthews has instructed me to inform you that one Beatrice Prior showed up at Erudite headquarters today. After a short meeting with Ms. Prior, Ms. Matthews requisitioned a vehicle to transport her back to the Dauntless compound. She will be arriving at approximately 1500 hrs. Please kindly remind your initiates that it is inappropriate for them to go gallivanting around other factions unaccompanied."
The video goes black and I blink at the screen. Jesus Tris, what the hell were you thinking? Going to Erudite headquarters and being noticed by Jeanine…she may as well have just ran down the street screaming look at me I'm divergent.
I check the time on my tablet, 14:52. She'll be back soon. I rush to get dressed and make my way out the door.
This girl is going to be the death of me.
I lean against the wall next to the side entrance of the compound as a large black town car comes into view. Frederick, Jeanine's personal driver, emerges from the vehicle and opens the passenger door. Tris steps out. Her expression turns into a mixture of relief and guilt when she sees me.
"Thank you Frederick," I say to the large, imposing man standing next to her. "Come with me initiate."
I turn towards the door and hold it open as Tris slowly makes her way over to me.
"Eric, I…"
"Not here," I cut her off. "Just go inside."
We walk down the hallway in silence. I stop at the entrance of one of the narrowly used interrogation rooms and motion for Tris to step inside. I close the door behind us and make sure my back is to the camera. The interrogation rooms are wired up for filming and audio, but when not in use, the footage isn't stored and the audio is disabled.
"Listen carefully," I say. "There is a camera behind us. I doubt anyone is watching, and they won't be able to hear us, but just in case be cognizant of your actions. I am your leader and you left this compound without permission. If anyone is watching, they need to think that that is the only thing going on here. Do you understand me?"
Her eyes look up in search of the camera and she nods.
"Okay, now tell me what the hell you were thinking going to Erudite of all places? Do you know how dangerous it is for someone like you to be noticed there?" I nearly yell.
"I wasn't thinking," she starts.
"No shit."
"I was upset and I just needed to get out of here so I ran. I jumped on the train without knowing where I was going and when I saw the Erudite headquarters approaching I figured the universe was telling me to go see Caleb. So I jumped off and I went to look for him."
I guess we both spent the morning running from something.
"Tris, do you know how stupid that was? And to be seen by Jeanine, of all people? God, how could you go and put a target on your back? I mean, Jeanine, she already…"
I trail off, how much classified information am I ready to share with her? And how much do I trust that this room is secure?
"She already what?" Tris asks curiously.
"She already has access to all of you simulation footage," I say, lowering my voice.
"Yeah, I kind of figured that out," she admits, looking away from me.
"What do you mean, you figured that out? Tris, what did you two talk about in your meeting?"
"She asked me about my aptitude test. Told me I was one of only two people from Abnegation to ever transfer to Dauntless…"
That doesn't explain how she knows about Jeanine watching the sim footage.
"And…?"
"And…she asked about my aptitude test, if I knew that my results were manually entered…and if I knew that one of my fear simulations failed to record…she also made a comment about how quickly I've been making it through the sims."
"Are you trying to get yourself killed?" I explode.
I thought I had been protecting her but Jeanine has obviously seen the same things in Tris' simulations that I have. Yet even after watching her sims and talking to her, Tris is still here…still alive…so Jeanine must have doubts about her divergence. Maybe I can still keep her safe.
"Tris, going there was stupid and reckless…"
"I know that."
I sigh.
Arguing about this is pointless. What's done is done. There's no taking it back now. Besides, we have bigger things to deal with.
I take a deep breath. "I need to tell you something…" I start but am interrupted by the door to the interrogation room swinging open followed by the familiar, yet always unwelcome, presence of Four. Why is he everywhere?
"For fuck's sake Four, are you stalking me or something?" I say, frustrated by his sudden arrival.
"What exactly is going on in here?" he demands.
"How did you even know we were in here?" Tris asks.
Four nods towards the camera in response.
"Oh, so you are stalking me then."
Four rolls his eyes. "You asked me to keep an eye on her, so I'm keeping an eye on her. Besides, after she ran out earlier I started to get worried."
"You knew? You knew that she left the compound and you didn't feel the need to tell me? Or at least go after her yourself?"
"You were nowhere to be found," he says pointedly, "and I didn't think she would have wanted me to."
"And why not, exactly? Actually," I turn my attention towards Tris, "you didn't tell me what upset you so much that you felt the need to run away."
"The fear landscapes."
"I kissed her."
They respond at the same time, talking over each other.
He kissed her. The words are like a punch to the gut, the air from my lungs seemingly disappearing. I look between the two of them. An image of them kissing infiltrates my mind and I have to swallow the bile that rises in my throat.
"Eric…" Tris starts.
"Stop," I say, raising my hand. You knew this was going to happen, Eric, she was never going to choose someone like you. I close my eyes and force five deep breaths into my lungs. Yes, he kissed her, but then, according to him, she bolted because of it. Could that mean it wasn't what she wanted? God, I don't have the capacity for this right now. I shake my head. "The reason is irrelevant and we've already moved passed your little field trip."
"It won't happen again," Tris says softly and something in her voice makes me question whether she's talking about leaving the compound or the kiss.
"We should go, Tris," Four says to her.
"No," she responds firmly. "You go ahead. I'm not done talking to Eric."
"Come on Tris." I can hear the exasperation in his voice.
"I'm not going anywhere," her tone is firm but not harsh. Almost like she wants him to know she is serious but also doesn't want to upset him. Regardless of what the kiss meant, it's clear that she cares for him.
"Fine," he says curtly. "Then neither am I."
I would give anything to just walk out of this room right now, get a drink and burn the contrived image of them kissing from my mind, but the looming threat of Max and Jeanine's plot stops me. This is bigger than a kiss, bigger than my feelings, bigger than all of us.
I look at Tris who is now glaring at Four.
"Tris, how much do you trust him?" I ask, pointing at Number Boy.
"What?" she says, obviously not expecting my question.
"Tell me honestly, can I trust him?" I say through gritted teeth.
She looks back and forth between us, swallowing hard before responding. "Yes, you can trust him."
I raise my hands, massaging the stiff muscles of my shoulders in vain and rolling my neck as I take another deep breath.
"Okay."
This is it, the last chance to turn back. The last chance to change my mind. The last chance to make the easy choice instead of the hard one.
"I found out some information earlier today. I need to talk to you both about it."
"What's going on, Eric?" Four asks sounding intrigued and concerned at the same time. Considering our relationship, he must know whatever I have to say is serious if I'm about to share it with him.
"Not here, it's not safe enough. After dinner, both of you, meet me at my apartment," I say. "Come separately. I'll leave the door unlocked so just walk in. Try not to be seen."
Tris looks at me, alarmed. "Eric, what…"
"Not here," I cut her off. "Tonight. Okay?"
They both nod.
"Good. Now we can't all leave here together. I'll go first and you two wait a minute before following suit."
I don't wait for them to respond before exiting the room.
* I was this close to uploading Chapter 26 labeled as 25 by accident, wrote the author's note and everything and barely realized what I was doing! Gah. Now that would have been confusing. Anyways...
Good morning beautiful people! (Or whatever time of the day you are reading this!) Here it is, chapter 25. Thank you for understanding my change in uploading schedule. I'm going to stick with Friday uploads for now with the hopes that I'll be able to go back to twice a week starting around the 3rdish week of July.
I hope you enjoyed this one and don't worry, the love triangle drama will be cleared up within the next two chapters.
Thanks for sticking with me everyone, you really keep me motivated! I hope you all have an amazing weekend and I'll see you in a week!
- MWB
