Like A Dream

By Crimson Beauty

Oneshot

It was dark, and wet. His eyelids are the night- he couldn't see a thing through those closed eyes. He didn't have the strength to open them, nor the will. He had forced a little smile of reassurance at his end, but now he felt stupid for doing so. He felt stupid for even thinking at all that there would be a sliver of hope mixed with this fate. He was wrong.

He could imagine her there, just standing with her chin and hands trembling. That was how he had left her. He regretted it. Even though he was gone, gone forever, he could still see her there in his dreams. Her one eye of emerald and one eye of light velvet blue danced in his fading memory.

He was but a dream, but in that one moment as he plunged over the edge, he felt alive. He had felt alive when that beautiful summoner had shared a breathtaking kiss with him. He had felt alive when he had plunged his sword through sin's tough skin. He had felt alive as he spoke with his father for the first time in...years.

Some part of him that was still alive somewhere just wouldn't let him forget. He could only dream, curled into a ball, floating in the middle of the inky black abyss. How could he dream when he, himself, was a dream. A living breathing dream. Or...was at one point. Or had he ever really existed? Was he only put on that Earth, or whatever it was, to help that strange girl along on her travels.

But he fell in love with her...and life itself became nothing but a dream for him. A good dream, not like a nightmare. In fact, that whole journey hadn't held even one ghoulish nightmare for him. Even as he was struck down in battle, when he was lost, when he was scared, when he watched another man set their lips upon his love, and not even when he found out that she was going to die, that he was going to disappear. Her beautiful face always shielded him from the nightmares. It always would.

What had he been thinking as he sent himself over the edge of that ship, to dive into the clouds, to whiz through the air, to splash into the ocean without a bit of pain. It had felt like flying. Flying, flying, all the way down until he suddenly stopped to realize that- no, he wasn't flying...he was falling. And then it was too late. Too late to turn back or fly back up, or tell that girl he loved her too.

And why hadn't he said that he loved her back? Because he had been stupid. He had thought that he would get to see her again, somehow, someway. Foolish thoughts had swarmed his brain as he decided to do what he had ended up doing. He hadn't been thinking when he dove off the edge, leaving her hanging like that. Now...he realized that he wasn't ever going to have that chance again. He was dead...or as dead as a person who was never alive could get.

What happened after you died anyway? Did you just black out, forget, and then have your very being wiped from the face of the earth as if you never really existed? Did you float around in nothingness, dreaming for the rest of eternity? Did you start over new, in a new life and in a new place with a new face and name? Or do you not even know your dead? With no one there to tell you it's really over, and no one there to guide you towards the light, you just keep on living in your own little world, like a dream.

He had forgotten most about his life. Like, what it had felt like to really live and move instead of curl there and think, remember what was still left in his brain and memory, which wasn't much anymore. But he could remember...a few things, at least. He could remember clearly that he missed her. His love. He really missed the feel of her silvery-brown hair threading through his fingers. He missed the way her innocence tasted on his lips, how forbidden she was.

It was clear, by now, that his mind was unweaving.

Her sobs echoed through his jumbled mind and thoughts. He was planning his move, how to sneak in for the kill, but now he couldn't think at all. Didn't she know he hated it when she cried? It really tore him up. But why was she crying now? What had he done or said to make those tears start to run? He knew it was his fault, or else she would be smiling and laughing gleefully. She was just like that. Always looking on the bright side.

He moved his hands onto her shoulders and whispered her name, eyebrows knitting inward. His golden hair was plastered against his neck, same as the crying girl in front of him. Her nose was tinged with pink, her cheeks red with a blush. The bright moonlight made her radiant skin glow even more than usual. She was beautiful, she was sad, she was everything he had always wanted and so much more.

Her bare skin felt so wonderful under his hand, even through that thick barrier of his leather gloves. She choked on her tears, nearly sobbing now, her shoulder slumping into his touch. Her beautiful eyes blinked slowly up at him, and his hands sank down her back. He sort of smiled at her, but only sort of. Who could smile while watching their love cry for a reason that just couldn't be explained?

The shining water lapped around his chest, the mysterious sparkles floating up behind them glowing bright. He dipped down, tilting his face to the side as his hands rose up again to wrap slowly around to her back and press her to him. He closed his eyes and tenderly pressed his lips to hers.

It wasn't long before her eyes sank closed, the shock wearing off, and her hand finding its way to his hip. The taste of her was amazing, the way she knew what she was doing, the way their mouths fit together so perfectly. Like it was meant to be.

He could feel it welling up inside his unused body. Tears. He had always been a crybaby. He always cried. He thought he had stopped after his father had left him. He thought he had grown strong, taught himself not to cry at all anymore. But he could feel it, tickling the rims of his eyes that no longer existed. He didn't have a body, no flesh or tears. So how was he crying? But he could feel them streaming down his cheeks somehow. Hadn't he disappeared? Hadn't he known he would all along?

Yuna.

He had been through so much with the young summoner. He had caught her when she was falling, nursed her wound on the inside and out, held her close, kissed her, fought alongside her, loved her, hurt her, and finally left her. What kind of person did that? Certainly not someone who was in love.

Then...why?

He felt like crying again, like he always used to do. He felt like crawling into a corner and bawling like a baby. No- he felt like curling up in his mother's arms, resting his wet and red cheek against her breasts and just sobbing. But he couldn't, and he didn't. His friends were there, watching him intently.

Their names...they had nearly fleeted his memory. But how could he ever forget them. Strong, brave Auron. Bold, mysterious Lulu. Crazy, funny Wakka. Silent, friendly Kimari. Energetic, bouncing Rikku. How could he ever just leave them? But he had already decided. He had to do this. It was better than just standing there until he had completely faded away.

He turned back to the glowing sunset, his eyes tearing up tragically. By the time he had finally cleared them away, he heard Yuna make a noise behind him. He turned, eyes bloodshot and sorrowful. It hurt to look at her, so confused at why this had to happened, why he couldn't explain to her that this is what he had to do. He opened his arms as she started towards him.

Tearing blue eyes slowly closed as he waited for her warm embrace. It never came. Only the mild whoosh of the girl passing straight through his fading body. He was no longer real, nothing but a figment of light and mind. He heard her body hit the ground somewhere behind him and the worried shriek of his other friends. He flinched, head hanging low. As much as he wanted to turn around, rush to her side and help her back onto her feet, he knew he couldn't. He couldn't touch her at all anymore. This was all his fault. He could only hope she wasn't hurt.

He glanced down at his trembling hands. They were nearly completely transparent now. He could see his feet through them. He slowly lowered them, listened to the strong girl get back on her feet. Her breathing was choked and strained and she didn't speak. He didn't blame her. If it were him, he would already hate her for doing this. Maybe that was just because he was so quick to hate. He covered up his sorrow with hate, so he wouldn't have a reason to cry for the loss.

He could almost feel Yuna trembling behind him. God, how he wanted to hold her right now. So badly. So, so badly. His head dropped lower, tears forming at the rims of his bright blue eyes. Then, suddenly, he could hear her voice.

"I love you."

Those words...Those beautiful, beautiful words in that amazing voice. He shuddered inwardly, letting the feeling of it sink it. Love. He turned quickly, eyes questioning, as if to ask if she really meant that, or would take it be back if, somehow, he really didn't have to leave. He only saw the back of her head, the wind blowing through her silken hair.

He stepped up behind her, the urge to kiss her throbbing at his lips. He couldn't. He couldn't touch her at all! But that didn't stop him from trying. The blonde haired boy slowly crossed his fading arms around Yuna's chest, sinking against the back of her. For a moment there...he thought he could feel her heart beating against his flesh. But only for a moment.

He let his arms drop, closed his eyes, and pushed forward. He had passed right through her and found himself staring out into the sky. The sunset touched every fluffy cloud with a hue of gold. It was beautiful. It didn't fit what any of them felt inside.

Finally, he felt those warm streaks down his cheeks. Of course...He was crying again like the baby the felt like inside. His eyes stung, the sunlight blurring and light stretching this way and that, distorted. How could he still cry if he was nearly completely faded from existence? Why did it still hurt so bad?

He didn't think. He didn't speak or take another teary-eyed glance back at his solemn group of friends. This was his goodbye. This was the end of his story.

He spread his arms wide and dove off the edge of the airship.

'She loved you. She loved you, you stupid fool.' He kept cursing himself angrily. Why was it that he could still remember her, still feel the deep cut of leaving her like it was fresh and new? Dying was harder than he had once thought. Maybe this was hell.

'But she loved me.'

The boy felt those tears again, thick on his cheeks. How could he cry when he could do nothing else at all. He couldn't move or blink or open his eyes. He couldn't breathe, yet he felt fine. He couldn't feel physical pain, only the pain of having his heart clenched in a stone hand of guilt.

Why had he given up so quickly? He had simply thrown aside their love, not bothering to maybe think up a plan to save himself. He had thought for hours on end how to save Yuna, but hadn't done the same when it came to himself. He gave up so easily. He gave up on himself, on his friends, on Yuna, on their love.

A faint tinkling hit his ears. He ceased his thoughts on the spot to listen. He could hear now, and now only his thoughts. Or was this his imagination running away with him, searching for what was missing in his heart. But he swore it was real, he swore he could hear the soft, soft sound of a whistle in the distance.

Whistling...

Was there still a chance to save it all? He could restore their love, if he tried. Could he do it? A mental smile spread across his lips as the whistling grew louder, stronger, prouder. He felt refreshed, his unhappy thoughts cleared. She loved him. She still loved him. He could hear it in her calling. She loved him, and he loved her. He would find his way back to her. He could do it.

And with that thought, Tidus opened his excited blue eyes, and took a deep breath, a smile on his lips.

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Well, this was just peachy, eh? Yeah. Not my first fic, so I guess I'm just on a roll with this fanfiction thing, eh? Maybe not. Anyway! I'd LOVE some reviews, if you don't mind. And...uhm...don't forget to check out my other story if you are an Inuyasha fan as well! I'm not entirely sure if I'll be doing any more Final Fantasy X fics. Not sure why. Well, mainly because I can't seem to think of any good plots for it. They do keep making sequels after all to wrap the story up completely. But this was nice though, eh? You know, since they skipped Final Fantasy 11 and went on to X-2 (12). Thanks! Not much to say anymore...so...yeah. Bye!