Hey everyone :)

Sorry I didn't introduce myself in the very beginning.

Thank you so much for reading my story, it really means a lot to me. Also - please note that I am not a native speaker of English, so even though I am constantly proof-reading my texts, it still can be, that some words or sentences may seem a little bit weird. But feel free to let me know if I could rewrite a sentence in other words, I appreciate your help.

Anyways, have fun reading my story!

"And then you met your lovely Tara, right?", the therapist asked, a bright smile seemed to be on her face. And also Katrina's face was enlightened.

"Yes, exactly. And until now she is my little guiding star.", she answered, smiling even brighter. She felt the tears from before drying up a bit.

"Where is she now?", the lady asked, writing something down in her notebook.

"School. She likes it there. It's further away, so she is staying in a dormitory, but she benefits a lot from it. Making a lot of friends, playing, studying. It's good!", Katrina said.

—-

The reveille began at 6 in the morning, when the sun just started rising over the vast steps. Katrina was often freezing in the night and therefore slept in her hoodie to keep warm. She was placed in a barrack of all women and was happy to have someone to talk to.

"You know about this rumour going around, that women's cycles start being on the same time when they are always around each other?", Kim, a woman a bit older than Katrina, said to her one morning, when they were making their beds, "It's bullshit. Don't believe in that. Everytime anyone here is bleeding. But you know what's good? They're providing us with sanitary napkins and tampons. You've seen them already in the bathroom?", she asked.

"Yeah, I did.", Katrina answered, slightly amused about the thing her tough comrade just told her.

"You a tampon or a napkin girl?", she asked that question as if it would be a normal thing around here to ask.

"Napkin, definitely.", Katrina answered. She was serious about that, she never liked tampons.

"Believe me or not, it can get annoying when you're all the day outside there on the battlefield, sweating and bleeding into that damn thing. Maybe you wanna try out the tampons!", it sounded more like an order than a suggestion. But she nodded.

"C'mon, morning exercise starts at 6.30 sharp, they don't accept any excuses!", and by saying that she closed her army shirt, straightened her bed once more and almost pulled Katrina outside with her.

After the morning exercise they were all sitting together in the dining room, eating their porridge and drinking their tea. Kim's serious gaze didn't change since when they stood up, but still was, at least in her own way, friendly.

"Oh, officer dwarf is approaching.", she stated, smiling into her porridge. And when Katrina looked up, wondering who she meant, she understood.

"Good morning, Sir!", Katrina yelled, standing up from her seat and the spoon for her porridge almost fell onto the floor. Kim was now grinning even more.

"Private Brown. We accepted a young girl tonight in the paediatric wing. She is lightly injured from a shooting committed by the Taliban in her house. Parents both killed.", Officer Watson said, his gaze notingly exhausted and sad.

"I will immediately go and have a look at her, Sir!", Katrina answered, suddenly feeling her heartbeat strongly in her chest, nervous about what she would be about to see.

Almost insidiously she went into the paediatric wing, her hands shaking and her breath flat. At this time there were not too many children here. A young boy, maybe at the age of two, accompanied by his mother, who was often saying prayers for his cure. He was badly injured at a bomb attack in his town, leaving him unable to walk. And there was a girl around 12, who was recovering from cholera. Katrina was ordered to wear a face mask around her and sanitise her body as often as possible. And then she saw the new girl in here. She was probably around five, her face was dirty from what seemed like dried blood and ashes, brown hair down to her chest and round black eyes. She was silently sitting on her bed, whimpering.

"Hey, little girl!", Katrina almost whispered, sitting next to her on the bed. The girl started sobbing, but managed to look into Katrina's face.

"I am Katrina!", she said with a warm voice, pointing at herself.

"And who are you?", she asked, pointing at the little girl next to her, who slightly started to shiver.

"T- Tara.", she answered. Katrina had to listen really carefully to understand what she was saying.

"Tara? What a lovely name!", she answered, smiling again brightly at her.

"Come on, let's get you all cleaned up!", she continued, standing up and offering her hand. And to her surprise, she took it and immediately followed her. She slowly went with her into the bathroom, where she filled a portable bathtub out of plastic with warm water.

"Water!", she said to her, knowing that this girl probably didn't speak English.

"Water.", Tara answered, looking into the bathtub. Katrina smiled.

"Let's take off your clothes, come on!", and she started helping the little girl with removing her clothes, helping her into the water. She took a soap, cleaned her face from all the dirt, careful not to be too rough to her. After that, she wrapped her into a towel and took some clean clothes for her, that they had spared in one of the lockers in the wing.

"Beautiful!", Katrina told her, smiling. And there it was, a smile, that Tara gave to her. She repeated her words.

She encountered herself spending almost all the day with Tara, trying to get to know her and to cheer her up. And by the end of the day, Tara could already say some words in English, like asking "How are you?" and "What's your name?" and even answering them.

At bedtime, Katrina brought the little girl to bed, even reading her a story from one of the books they had in the wing. Tara listened carefully, as if she was still studying the English language with every word that came out of her mouth.

As Katrina was preparing to go to bed as well, she heard Tara sobbing behind her. She turned around, just to see the little girl being all in tears, looking onto the ceiling.

"Mama!", she whimpered. And probably it was at this time, when Katrina's heart jumped, that some weird feelings in her appeared, which she didn't have before. She almost started sobbing herself, but told herself that it wouldn't appear nice as a member of the army. So she just returned to Tara, stroked her forehead and smiled at her.

"Don't worry. I am here.", she said, not even wondering about what she just said. And then she laid down next to her, wrapping her arm around and comforting her.

The next few weeks she's spent as much time as possible with Tara. Sometimes she even let her assist in preparing some bandages and medical supplies for her patients, which made the little girl really proud of herself. And even her English improved over the weeks. She would never forget the day, when she opened a map in a geography book and showed Tara England, where she was from. What Tara said in this moment, made Katrina kind of speechless.

"Tara England?", the girl asked, pointing with her finger at the map. Katrina was unsettled, not really bringing a word out of her mouth. She knew she had to answer something, when Tara looked at her and said: "Yes?"

"Maybe.", Katrina answered, slightly smiling and looking at her. Wow. She never thought about the future. But she knew that she grew quite fond of this little girl and it would break her heart to leave her behind, especially thinking about the fact that Tara was now an orphan and wouldn't have too much of a future here.

"Yes?", she asked again.

"Wait.", Katrina answered, looking at the white wall in front of her, thinking about what she should do now.

"I want to adopt Tara, Sir.", Katrina said to Officer Watson, looking determined about her decision.

"That- that's ridiculous!", Officer Watson answered, looking shocked at what he just heard.

"No, it should be possible. I took a look at all the requirements I have to meet and it definitely would be possible, Sir.", she answered, looking even stricter at her officer.

"But you are a member of the army. You have a duty to fulfil. Having motherly feelings for a little girl here is actually-"

"Quite human. And to be expected. And definitely not unprofessional.", she interrupted him.

"And then what? Taking her back to England? She doesn't even speak English!", Katrina could hear the doubts in Officer Watson's voice.

"She is learning!"

"You're not even married!"

"It would be new for me that you have to be married to adopt."

"Sir.", she added out of politeness and respect for the officer she sincerely had respect for.

"Okay, okay. Let me figure out something. But I won't promise anything!", he said, walked away, leaving Katrina with a light smile on her face.

—-

"And now he has grown really fond of Tara himself, right?", the therapist asked her.

"Oh yes. He's like an uncle to her I would say.", Katrina smiled and wiped the tears away, which came into her eyes over and over again.

"And how was Mr. Holmes to her?", she asked further. To hear the name again felt like stabbing a knife into her heart.

"He- he was like… maybe like a father, even. I don't know.", and she let her head sink into her hands, sobbing again, thinking about all the things they'd never experience together. As a small family.