2b: Just When You Thought Things Couldn't Get Any Worse.
~~~~~~~~
"What was with the gun though? I mean, it's not like he really needs it."
Any subject was preferable to this newest complication in the Bet
going on. Even the Bard had winced as they listened in on Thoth's
explanation to Ranma of the exact nature of the Universal Compatibility
Spell.
~~~~~~
Apparently it permanently "altered" the victim in such a way
as to allow them to consummate a relationship with a person
of the opposite gender of virtually any humanoid race by
compensating for any severe differences in size or genetics
between the two.
The Ibis God confessed that it had never been intended for a
CosmoKnight though. There was no telling what side-effects
the magic might have on Ranma's cosmically charged body.
He had to admit though it would probably be very interesting.
He even offered a handsome sum to be able to observe and
record the results. Ranma politely turned him down.
~~~~~~~~
"Hmm? Oh you mean why he didn't just start blasting his
way through like a one man army?"
"Yeah, I mean look at him. He's got the firepower,
why doesn't he use it?"
"Same reason Rowan rarely uses his powers, it's the
equivalent of painting a nice fat bullseye on your back
while waving a sign around that says `Big threat here, please kill me!'
Not to mention that it's not just overkill, it's extreme overkill.
And that goes against the code of conduct for a CosmoKnight."
"Code of conduct?"
The Guardian closed his eyes and quietly counted to ten.
{Must.....control.....fist...of....death.}
"He talking about the silly chivalry and honor thing."
"Oh! Why didn't you say so!?"
"Ahem, a code of honor is not a thing nor is it silly. Just because
SOME of us make it habit of fighting dirty in order to win is no
reason to insult the ones who are civilized enough to have a
sense of morals."
The Guardian glared at Shadow meaningfully.
Shadow ignored it, he knew that irked the knight more then anything else.
"I use whatever works. Too bad Ranma can't anymore."
"What do you mean?"
"The code of the CosmoKnight is more flexible
then most. Basically your standard be good and
protect the innocent package deal. However part of the
code also means keeping a low profile and at least
attempting to do things the legal way."
"And if they don't?"
"They fall. That.....would be a bad thing."
"So what about when the law doesn't work?"
"When that happens, then they pull out the heavy firepower,
start kicking ass and taking names."(1)
~~~~~~~~~~~
-Juesenkyo
"Ah sir, you are most unlucky."
The guide had heard a scream and
arrived just in time to see a charred
boy wearing a bandanna leap into
one of the cursed springs.Not just any
normal cursed spring either, this particular
spring had a very ancient legend surrounding it.
Only the truly stupid people of the land, those who
blamed their misfortunes on others and relied on violence
to solve their problems ever fell into this spring.
The spring of drowned.....
"Hee Haw!!!" [Translation: "Ranma, this is all your fault!!!"]
...Jackass.(2)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
-A Few Provinces Over
Genma was fleeing for his life.
If the Amazons caught him then the only
future he had was as a rug by the fireplace.
All he'd done was eaten one lousy feast!
Was that any reason to go on the warpath?!
Genma would have cursed his lousy luck
but he needed the all the air he had for running.
It was definitely time to leave China.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Are you sure you didn't forget anything sir?"
"Yeah, I've got everything all packed up to go.
You worry too much Lo Shun, it's not good for you."
"Sorry Captain."
He hesitated then gave her a quick hug.
"It's okay, I'm going to miss your fussing over me."
"Captain!"
"My, such an interesting shade of red you're turning."
Hefting his two bags Ranma Saotome walked out
to the hanger, whistling a cheerful little ditty. Behind him
a very flustered Amazon tried to regain her composure.
~~~~~~~~~
"Good luck, Ranma." Tania's normally cheerful voice was subdued,
the loss of the finest man any of them had ever met was hitting her
the hardest out of the crew.
With longing eyes and aching hearts they watched on the viewscreens
as their former commander's Avenger Power Armor descended
toward the world below.....
~~~~~~~~~
It was an empty planet, mostly dry hot desert. Although the
atmosphere was just barely within the minimal life sustaining range
its lack of any type of natural resources and its distance from any
easily reachable population center had insured that the planet
remained uninhabited, it was too far from the normal trade routes
for even pirates to use as a base. If there was a bright center to
the universe this was probably the planet furthest from it.
"Okay, I'm here. Now what?"
Seeing no immediate answer forthcoming,
Ranma settled down to wait.
~~~~~~~~~~~
He waited for an hour.
Cosmoknights were supposed to be invulnerable
to extreme temperature changes.
"Damn, it's hot."
~~~~~~~~
Another three hours passed.
He'd had to dismiss his Avenger back
into its dimensional pocket to prevent the
generators from overheating. Still no sign.
Patience was a warrior's virtue.
Ranma was rapidly reaching the limit of his.
This was getting ridiculous.
"Hey! I'm HERE!! Make with
the Bippity Boppety Boo already!!!"
Silence answered him.
"Damn it! I wish something would happen!!"
Ranma's eyes widened as soon as the words
left his mouth, he'd done it again.
You'd think after all this time he would
know better then to say something like that.
When would he ever learn?
The ground beneath him collapsed.
"AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!"
A moment after he passed through the underground
Rift it closed again with what suspiciously sounded
like a giant burp.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
-Back at Juesenkyo
A rip opened in the fabric of space and time once more. A truly alien
mosaic of magic and quantom level energy that deposited several tons
of sand and greyish dirt onto one of the springs, filling it completely.
Several seconds later a young man fell onto the small hill that had formed.
Right after that a backpack and good-sized suitcase crashed into the
young man's noggin.
Ranma was back.
His arrival didn't go unnoticed.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Washu's curiosity was piqued. Her sensors had just picked up a
large dimensional anomaly that had lasted exactly 2.45 minutes.
According to the data, something had come through it.
A familiar gleam filled her eye.
This was very interesting...
~~~~~~~~~~~
Sailor Pluto spit out her tea in surprise as she sensed the
surge of power that marked the Rift's presence. And it
originated from the same general region where the recent
disturbance in the Earth's leylines had come from.
Something had come to Earth.
Something powerful. Something dangerous.
She needed to find the Outer Senshi immediately.
Luna and Artemis were already meeting with the Inner Senshi.
~~~~~~~~~
The surge of power passed a certain temple.
Belldandy, Urd and Skuld all blinked in surprise.
Something was up, a call to the Almighty might be in order.
Mara was already on the phone with her superiors.
~~~~~~~~~~
Ranma dusted himself off, as landings went it hadn't been too bad.
He inhaled deeply.
He was back home. Well not really, looked like he was right back
where had started from in China. But this was HIS Earth, no monsters
or demons or killer aliens and having to save the world every couple of
days.
At last, Ranma had finally gotten back to a normal world, the weirdness
that had been dominating his life for the past four years was finally over.
If he'd been able to see into the future Ranma might not have
been so relieved.
But for now...Life was Good.
(To be continued)
~~~~~~~~~
(1) This is arguably the most fun part about being
a Cosmoknight.
(2) Inspired by Peter Suzuki's fic "Spring of Drowned Goblin"
and Ukyo's classic line from the Anime.
The Code of the CosmoKnight(Condensed version):
Defend the just and the good.
Defend the weak and innocent.
Defend nature.
Protect the Cosmic Forge.
Obey the law unless it's evil.
Fight Evil.
Never betray or abandon a friend or comrade.
Always keep your word.
Never give in to Evil.
Show mercy to those who deserve it.
Show respect where it is due.
Never taunt those weaker then you.
Die with Honor.
~~~~~~~~
"What was with the gun though? I mean, it's not like he really needs it."
Any subject was preferable to this newest complication in the Bet
going on. Even the Bard had winced as they listened in on Thoth's
explanation to Ranma of the exact nature of the Universal Compatibility
Spell.
~~~~~~
Apparently it permanently "altered" the victim in such a way
as to allow them to consummate a relationship with a person
of the opposite gender of virtually any humanoid race by
compensating for any severe differences in size or genetics
between the two.
The Ibis God confessed that it had never been intended for a
CosmoKnight though. There was no telling what side-effects
the magic might have on Ranma's cosmically charged body.
He had to admit though it would probably be very interesting.
He even offered a handsome sum to be able to observe and
record the results. Ranma politely turned him down.
~~~~~~~~
"Hmm? Oh you mean why he didn't just start blasting his
way through like a one man army?"
"Yeah, I mean look at him. He's got the firepower,
why doesn't he use it?"
"Same reason Rowan rarely uses his powers, it's the
equivalent of painting a nice fat bullseye on your back
while waving a sign around that says `Big threat here, please kill me!'
Not to mention that it's not just overkill, it's extreme overkill.
And that goes against the code of conduct for a CosmoKnight."
"Code of conduct?"
The Guardian closed his eyes and quietly counted to ten.
{Must.....control.....fist...of....death.}
"He talking about the silly chivalry and honor thing."
"Oh! Why didn't you say so!?"
"Ahem, a code of honor is not a thing nor is it silly. Just because
SOME of us make it habit of fighting dirty in order to win is no
reason to insult the ones who are civilized enough to have a
sense of morals."
The Guardian glared at Shadow meaningfully.
Shadow ignored it, he knew that irked the knight more then anything else.
"I use whatever works. Too bad Ranma can't anymore."
"What do you mean?"
"The code of the CosmoKnight is more flexible
then most. Basically your standard be good and
protect the innocent package deal. However part of the
code also means keeping a low profile and at least
attempting to do things the legal way."
"And if they don't?"
"They fall. That.....would be a bad thing."
"So what about when the law doesn't work?"
"When that happens, then they pull out the heavy firepower,
start kicking ass and taking names."(1)
~~~~~~~~~~~
-Juesenkyo
"Ah sir, you are most unlucky."
The guide had heard a scream and
arrived just in time to see a charred
boy wearing a bandanna leap into
one of the cursed springs.Not just any
normal cursed spring either, this particular
spring had a very ancient legend surrounding it.
Only the truly stupid people of the land, those who
blamed their misfortunes on others and relied on violence
to solve their problems ever fell into this spring.
The spring of drowned.....
"Hee Haw!!!" [Translation: "Ranma, this is all your fault!!!"]
...Jackass.(2)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
-A Few Provinces Over
Genma was fleeing for his life.
If the Amazons caught him then the only
future he had was as a rug by the fireplace.
All he'd done was eaten one lousy feast!
Was that any reason to go on the warpath?!
Genma would have cursed his lousy luck
but he needed the all the air he had for running.
It was definitely time to leave China.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Are you sure you didn't forget anything sir?"
"Yeah, I've got everything all packed up to go.
You worry too much Lo Shun, it's not good for you."
"Sorry Captain."
He hesitated then gave her a quick hug.
"It's okay, I'm going to miss your fussing over me."
"Captain!"
"My, such an interesting shade of red you're turning."
Hefting his two bags Ranma Saotome walked out
to the hanger, whistling a cheerful little ditty. Behind him
a very flustered Amazon tried to regain her composure.
~~~~~~~~~
"Good luck, Ranma." Tania's normally cheerful voice was subdued,
the loss of the finest man any of them had ever met was hitting her
the hardest out of the crew.
With longing eyes and aching hearts they watched on the viewscreens
as their former commander's Avenger Power Armor descended
toward the world below.....
~~~~~~~~~
It was an empty planet, mostly dry hot desert. Although the
atmosphere was just barely within the minimal life sustaining range
its lack of any type of natural resources and its distance from any
easily reachable population center had insured that the planet
remained uninhabited, it was too far from the normal trade routes
for even pirates to use as a base. If there was a bright center to
the universe this was probably the planet furthest from it.
"Okay, I'm here. Now what?"
Seeing no immediate answer forthcoming,
Ranma settled down to wait.
~~~~~~~~~~~
He waited for an hour.
Cosmoknights were supposed to be invulnerable
to extreme temperature changes.
"Damn, it's hot."
~~~~~~~~
Another three hours passed.
He'd had to dismiss his Avenger back
into its dimensional pocket to prevent the
generators from overheating. Still no sign.
Patience was a warrior's virtue.
Ranma was rapidly reaching the limit of his.
This was getting ridiculous.
"Hey! I'm HERE!! Make with
the Bippity Boppety Boo already!!!"
Silence answered him.
"Damn it! I wish something would happen!!"
Ranma's eyes widened as soon as the words
left his mouth, he'd done it again.
You'd think after all this time he would
know better then to say something like that.
When would he ever learn?
The ground beneath him collapsed.
"AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!"
A moment after he passed through the underground
Rift it closed again with what suspiciously sounded
like a giant burp.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
-Back at Juesenkyo
A rip opened in the fabric of space and time once more. A truly alien
mosaic of magic and quantom level energy that deposited several tons
of sand and greyish dirt onto one of the springs, filling it completely.
Several seconds later a young man fell onto the small hill that had formed.
Right after that a backpack and good-sized suitcase crashed into the
young man's noggin.
Ranma was back.
His arrival didn't go unnoticed.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Washu's curiosity was piqued. Her sensors had just picked up a
large dimensional anomaly that had lasted exactly 2.45 minutes.
According to the data, something had come through it.
A familiar gleam filled her eye.
This was very interesting...
~~~~~~~~~~~
Sailor Pluto spit out her tea in surprise as she sensed the
surge of power that marked the Rift's presence. And it
originated from the same general region where the recent
disturbance in the Earth's leylines had come from.
Something had come to Earth.
Something powerful. Something dangerous.
She needed to find the Outer Senshi immediately.
Luna and Artemis were already meeting with the Inner Senshi.
~~~~~~~~~
The surge of power passed a certain temple.
Belldandy, Urd and Skuld all blinked in surprise.
Something was up, a call to the Almighty might be in order.
Mara was already on the phone with her superiors.
~~~~~~~~~~
Ranma dusted himself off, as landings went it hadn't been too bad.
He inhaled deeply.
He was back home. Well not really, looked like he was right back
where had started from in China. But this was HIS Earth, no monsters
or demons or killer aliens and having to save the world every couple of
days.
At last, Ranma had finally gotten back to a normal world, the weirdness
that had been dominating his life for the past four years was finally over.
If he'd been able to see into the future Ranma might not have
been so relieved.
But for now...Life was Good.
(To be continued)
~~~~~~~~~
(1) This is arguably the most fun part about being
a Cosmoknight.
(2) Inspired by Peter Suzuki's fic "Spring of Drowned Goblin"
and Ukyo's classic line from the Anime.
The Code of the CosmoKnight(Condensed version):
Defend the just and the good.
Defend the weak and innocent.
Defend nature.
Protect the Cosmic Forge.
Obey the law unless it's evil.
Fight Evil.
Never betray or abandon a friend or comrade.
Always keep your word.
Never give in to Evil.
Show mercy to those who deserve it.
Show respect where it is due.
Never taunt those weaker then you.
Die with Honor.
