For Good or Bad, The Memories Remain.

Chapter 40 "The Missing, pt 1"

The large sleek car rolled along the coastal highway, the storm-churned surf below a thousand different switchbacks and shear drop-offs. This was the serenity and beauty of Highway One going along the California coast and up through Oregon to Washington State. This was the reason the auburn-haired driver chose this route. She had some major life issues to iron out in addition to finding Johneen. The pleasure of gliding the massive muscle car through twisty turns wasn't one of the things that used to bring her pleasure. In fact she used to be quite nervous to drive even a little geo metro. That car would fit in the trunk of her current ride. A car given to her by her once second best friend as well as the passion for driving. A friend that held a million secrets, and now she knows them all, including the thousand different names she had used. Buffy Summers. The name still fits her but now she knows that "Buffy "was a desperate mask worn to escape the past and the weight of 900 years of living a violent life as an immortal slayer. The auburn haired girl, all of 20 herself, now knew what that was like, having had every memory that "Buffy" had ever had rammed into her brain, in crystal clear detail. She now knew every though the little blond slayer had ever had, every emotion and every secret. Aye, and there lay the rub. All of this info taints her own perception of life. She can never go back to the simple college student that slings magic to save the world upon occasion. She can also never go back to only figuring to live another 3-5 years living in the shadow of the hell mouth. The girl who would have never bet to see 16, then 20 now could live to see a thousand. She just has to fight to carve the knowledge she can use from the emotional landmines of Buffy's memories to create her own. She stops at one of the scenic overlooks with a commanding view of the setting sun. She gets out of the massive black beast and sits watching the blood red sun setting over a storm tossed sea. As the sunset faded into twilight, she rose and thanked the goddess for such a beautiful experience. She felt a little more at ease with herself. As she slid into the driver's seat she caught a glimpse of herself and had to stop for a moment. She looked herself dead in the eye and said out loud "I Am Willow Rosenberg. I am Immortal. I cannot die. "