If there's one thing that I've noticed about being with James that I didn't expect, it's the immediate integration into his circle of friends. I mean, I knew Remus and Sirius and Peter beforehand, and we'd chat and help one another out in lessons, but this is different. Rather than being absent from his duties as marauder extraordinaire, James has simply decided that I should come along and join in myself.
A couple of years ago, that might have been a recipe for disaster, but they have grown up a lot since then. Well, James and Remus have. I'm not so sure about Peter and Sirius.
Anyway, that's where I'm going in a minute, to meet them all in the Common Room. Since I feel that one of these secret marauder meetings should be documented (just to prove I was actually there), my trusty quill will be recording in my bag.
OK, I'm going to be late if I don't get a move on. See you there, as it were.
- - - - - - -
Maybe I was going a bit far when I said 'secret' meeting. After all, there's nothing particularly secretive about a group of friends getting together in a crowded common room. I think that it just feels that way to me, because I've never been involved before. I always had these mad ideas about the crazy things that they got up to, but since actually spending time with them I've pretty much come to the conclusion that the most exciting thing the marauders ever did was hex Severus Snape.
They're all here already, and as I descend the stairs from the girls dormitory they're deep in conversation. James' head turns as I come near to them, which is sweet, and gives me that goofy grin which has hardly left his face since that morning in this very common room three or so weeks ago.
"Hey you." Who would ever have thought that two words had the capablity to make a person smile so much? The others have been alerted to my presence now too. Remus looks happy to see me, as always, though I can't say so much for Sirius.
"Hello Lily. Come to join our meeting of reprobates anonymous?" As if.
"Remus, if I were to be a reprobrate, which I certainly am not, there would be nothing anonymous about it. I would most definitely make sure that everyone knew it was me." Remus is trying to keep his composure but failing miserably, because I can see that smile playing on his lips.
There's a space for me on one of the large squishy chairs beside James, so I'll sit there. It's amazing to me how I've been there less than a second and already his one arm has found my waist. It's a bit cold down here, even with the large fire roaring, and James' warmth is seeping comfortably onto my back as he holds me tight. I can see that my contentment is earning me another look from Sirius, but I actually don't care, because this is worth it.
"So," says Sirius, in a rather obvious attempt to get the focus of the group back onto himself, "can we get back to business?"
"I'm sorry. If I'm interrupting something important I can come back later." James' hand tightens on my waist a little, and I squeeze it lightly with my own, to let him know I'm only teasing Sirius. Remus is smiling at the floor in an embarrassed fashion.
"Green isn't your colour, Sirius." I'd expect such a comment to worsen Sirius' mood, but instead it seems to have calmed him down a bit. A wry smile comes across his face. "Mmmbrm." Everyone chuckles, except me, because I don't really understand what's going on.
"That was 'sorry' in Sirius-speak." James isn't speaking all that loudly, but him being so close to my ear and being able to feel his breath on my cheek as he's speaking startles me more than I would have thought. His words amuse me, but this really highlights for me how much I still have to learn about the marauders.
"Apology accepted." He still looks a little chagrined, but at least he's not glaring at me any more.
"But Padfoot is right. We have to get back to business. It'll be full moon soon." There's no misunderstanding Peter's comment, especially for Remus it seems, who has lost the smile he had a moment ago and is sitting, head bowed, eyes closed.
"Thank you, Peter, for bringing that up in the crowded common room. I was aware." He looks so sad, poor dear. Sirius seems to have regained his good mood at this opportunity to give Peter a thorough thwack around the head.
"Idiot."
"Sorry."
Then there's a silence, which gives me a moment to ponder. Obviously, I know about Remus'... condition. He's told me himself. I've always wondered though how his close friends deal with it. It must be awful to sit in your dormitory, with one empty bed, for a night or two each month, hoping that your friend is ok.
Suddenly, I feel like I'm intruding on something very personal. I don't know how they deal with it, and it feels callous and assuming of me to be sitting here whilst they talk about it.
"I have to go." Whatever they were expecting to break the silence, I don't think it was that. James looks like a puppy who's just been told he can't play, Remus and Sirius look suprised and Peter looks pleased with himself. "I've got revision to do." Which is true, to be fair. Not that it makes leaving James any easier.
"But"
"I'll see you later." It's a little consolation, it seems, and reluctantly he relinquishes his hold on me.
"OK."
I squeeze his hand, the last thing left touching me. He's so warm, and I'm very close to changing my mind.
"Enjoy yourself." Remus' voice snaps me from my reverie and reminds me why I was leaving in the first place. He's looking less surprised now, like he knows why I'm going really. He's smart, I should expect him to know.
OK, so I've left, smiled a last smile at James, and I'm heading back upstairs. I still don't know if I've done the right thing, but I couldn't stay, so I must have.
I'm inside my room, and the bed looks inviting so I collapse onto it. I wasn't tired before, but now I am. I don't know why.
Wait a minute- what's this? Feels like paper, yes, it is. It's got Lily written on it, in a heart, so it can only be from one person. Lord only knows how he managed to get it upstairs onto my pillow, but that's James for you.
Meet me at ten thirty in the Common Room tonight.
There's something I have to show you.
x J x
Mystery and intrigue, thy name is James!
Maybe it's childish, but I'm excited. I wonder what he wants to show me?
