I'm back :)

Chapter eight

Procyon listened carefully to the story. Uncle Regulus was trying to stay calm while telling it, but 'I've just seen the life of my Death Eater other self' is hardly a topic for a casual conversation.

'I don't think I've seen everything, and I don't remember everything I've seen,' he said 'It's kind of like a dream, except it's real… But I can tell you one thing for sure,' he made a dramatic pause here 'Dumbledore was right about the Horcruxes.'

Procyon had no idea what Horcruxes were, not to mention what Dumbledore had said about them, but he knew better than to ask. All he could find out by asking was that it was not something fourteen-year-old children should know about.

'Of course he was,' Tonks commented 'When was he ever wrong?'

'How about when the greasy git showed him the green light?' Padfoot muttered darkly 'If I ever get my hands on that bastard…'

Procyon cautiously took a step away from him hoping the subject would change quickly. There was one thing about this otherwise fairly nice man that scared the hell out of the boy: his ability to hate.

'What?' Uncle Reg asked in shock.

'Yeah, Dumbledore's dead,' Padfoot said 'I can't get used to it either. Leave this world alone for one year and when you're back …'

'So what did you see?' Tonks asked.

'Ah, yeah,' Uncle Regulus said 'Well, I remember when you' he nodded towards Padfoot 'came back from Hogwarts after your first year. I remember Mother's reaction. It was scary.'

'Yeah, it was,' the other man muttered.

'So two years later, when I sat under the Sorting Hat, I was desperate to be sorted into Slytherin,' the first one continued 'You can imagine why.'

'Yeah, I guess,' Procyon agreed. He hardly remembered his grandmother when she was alive, but her portrait was enough. 'But I wouldn't have been,' he added fiercely. He might even had been right. After all he was the youngest of three children and a Gryffindor. Then again, his brother and sister had always been exactly what their parents wanted them to be. Well, until last year, when Orion had been forced to make his own decision, due to a nasty incident involving a Bludger and a curse.

'That's why I wasn't a Gryffindor in either world. Although I nearly became a Hufflepuff in this one. Because I was so loyal to my family… It's funny, really,' he said 'considering everything that happened later. How I joined the Death Eaters,' (Procyon shuddered) 'and how I betrayed them only a few months later.'

'I've always wondered why,' Padfoot said.

'I feel like it just… happened,' Uncle Regulus said uncertainly 'I only joined after Narcissa did,' he explained 'She was my favorite cousin. I wasn't quite sure I trusted Bella about it, but I thought if Cissy joined them it can't be that bad. And it would make Mother happy… So I did it. The Dark Mark hurts like hell,' It probably really did, if even a memory of a memory of it could make the man wince and press his right hand to his left forearm 'I suppose that is a sort of test of loyalty, too. To see if you can stand a little pain for your master and your cause. Then again, if you fail that test they probably kill you… And then Barty Crouch sort of followed me there. He really believed in the cause. All the others were impressed… Thought I had taught him to believe it. When I wasn't sure what I believed myself!

But it got me close to You-Know-Who's inner circle. Close enough to overhear some important conversations. And the more I heard the surer I was that my master was an evil bastard… And what they made me do…' he shuddered 'I don't know what I'd been expecting, but… not killing Muggles just because they're Muggles… Not torturing them just because killing isn't cruel enough.

I couldn't just leave, though. I knew there was only one way out of where I was, and I kind of liked being alive. I hated living for a cause I didn't believe in, but I wasn't sure the other cause was worth dying for. Especially if my death wouldn't really change anything anyway. It seemed rather pointless, really.

And then I overheard that conversation. He was giving something to Lucius Malfoy. Telling him to keep it safe. It was really important for him. He said something about it making him immortal. I spent the next few weeks trying to figure out what it was. I read a lot of Dark Magic books. I listened at doors. I knew He would kill me if he discovered me, but it didn't seem that important any more. After all if he didn't discover me, I could find out his secrets. And I did. I wrote you a letter. I tried to drop a couple of hints, but of course I couldn't say anything directly… And then I went to that cave… I made Kreacher come with me in case I needed any help. I Oblivated him afterwards… I guess that didn't go too well…'

'Ah, so that's what messed up his mind so much,' Padfoot commented 'I thought it was from spending too much time with Mum…'

'Anyway, I took the Horcrux. I wanted to destroy it, but I didn't have time to work out how.'

'You know where it is?' Tonks asked him.

'I know where I left it,' he corrected and continued his story 'Of course I knew I had to run for it,' he said 'I couldn't lie to Him, especially not about something that big. But they still got me after a few days. They knew there was something wrong when I didn't show up after He called me. And when they found out where I was, they didn't bother to ask me what was wrong.

It was Barty who came for me. My friend. The one I had got into this. And he didn't even have enough mercy to make it quick. But I'm quite sure he didn't know what I had done.'

The three of them just stood there in awkward silence, staring at him, unsure what to say. Padfoot was the first one to speak.

'I… I didn't know…' he said 'But I hoped,' he added after a moment.

'Does that count as "something really big"?' Uncle Regulus asked.

'Bigger than I expected,' Padfoot replied 'I'm proud of you, little brother.'

Procyon had no idea what it was about, but it must have been some kind of inside joke, because it made both men laugh.