Chapter 9: The Losses We Carry

Daniel did his best to shake off his exhaustion. How long had he slept? Five, six, seven hours? He couldn't tell. His watch had not survived his impromptu bath in the creek earlier. He was somewhere halfway between collapse and comfort. He hadn't felt this ugly since the last few weeks of Basic. Yet, not as bad as the last week, when he would sway on his feet in broad daylight.

Stupid midnight fire duty.

Unfortunately, he was wake enough for his sense of smell to return. His nose wrinkled at the stench the corpses emitted. The last fight had been terrifying. The z-dogs clawing, slamming against the windows. Himself, trapped in the helicopter. Is this the fate he had saved Kevin from?

He had waited until the glass began to give way. Then, he opened fire. The fight had cost him an entire magazine, a combination of wavering aim and burst fire. That meant his poor M16 only had a single magazine of ammo left to him.

All this and more rattled around his mind as his greeting faded into the forest. The entirety of Alpha Team stood before him. Three images solidified in Daniel's mind. The original game's poor, block graphics. The Remake's more impressive curves and colors. And the reality standing in front of him. The reality was as different as the Remake was from the original.

Jill Valentine put her handgun down as she stepped forward. "Are you Private First Class Sims?"

Daniel nodded, a ghost of his smile playing across his face. "That's right. I take it my friends and Kevin got back safe and sound?" The question was rhetorical. It was obvious that was the case if Alpha Team already knew his name. Yet, Daniel wasn't prepared for the pause in Jill's reply. His mood, tentative and weak as it was, started to sink deeper. "…what?"

Jill stepped forward, naked concern and compassion in her features. "There's been an incident," she began.

Daniel's head jerked side-to-side. "No. No, we sent them back to Raccoon to be safe. Away from everything. They're supposed to be safe, and they were supposed to send you out to help Bravo and us." The dread spiked as Daniel's mind worked through his exhaustion. "But you should have been here hours ago. We split up this morning."

"We don't have all of the details," Jill continued as she stepped up to him. She was only an inch or two shorter than he was, but Daniel felt like she was towering over him with a scythe. A reluctant reaper. "But there was an encounter. One of your friends, Tim, and Kevin," she paused, her own emotions hitting her. "They didn't make it."

A sledgehammer pounded into Daniel's chest. "No," he whispered.

"The other two are fine," Jill offered. "They're at the hospital right now."

"All of them were supposed to be fine," Daniel hissed as he backed away, lightly colliding with the helicopter. Three. Three of his friends were dead now. It didn't matter he had actively tried to protect the survivors.

As hard as that hit him, it was only half the blow. The other was simple, hard truth.

Nothing had changed.

Kevin, despite all they had done for him, had died. They had failed to save Edward. After he had thought he could use his knowledge to make things better for everyone, reality had proven him wrong.

Despair, black as the night, festered within his spirit. His gaze dropped to the dying earth at his feet. "What's the point?" He mumbled, the pain ripping tears from his eyes. He knew Jill and the others were watching him. A primal part of him recoiled at the overt weakness he was showing, but it was a small part of his mind. At that moment, he struggled to think about anything else than his utter defeat.

A hand touched his shoulder. He didn't look up. "I know you've gone through a lot in such a short amount of time," Jill said, her words as gentle as silk. "But we need you to help us. Your friend, Bruce, told us you were traveling with Rebecca and Bravo Team. Where are they now?"

The sense of failure doubled. "I don't know," he murmured. "We got separated this morning. I got lost. I can't do anything right," he said, forcing back a sob.

"We don't have time for this pity par-" Someone started to say before Jill hushed them.

After a moment, Jill continued, more softly, "Daniel, I understand your grief. My mother died when I was around your age. I blamed myself for not doing more, for not being able to stop her death. I can understand how you're being crushed inside. I need you to fight it, just for a little bit. Is there anything more you can tell us? Your friend Bruce mentioned a mansion as the target for their investigation. Do you know where it is?"

Daniel hesitated, which added to his own self-disgust, and a new voice barged in. "Private, the situation is critical. Lives depend on your information."

Daniel's eyes snapped up to the speaker. Captain Wesker, with his ever-present sunglasses, waited for an answer. The sheer hypocrisy of his demand caused something to snap within Daniel. The budding self-loathing abruptly turned from inward to outward. "Then why don't you tell them where it is?" The soldier hissed.

That answer caused a burst of confusion from Joseph who looked from Daniel to Wesker. Wesker maintained his unflappable expression. "We don't time fo-"

"Then tell them!" Daniel shouted. Some part of his mind watched the sudden mood swing with alarm, but that side of logic was far too small to stop himself from pushing off the helicopter and marching up to murderous captain. "You already know where the mansion is! If time was that critical, you could have brought the entire team straight there, landed on the helipad!"

"Easy there, soldier," Chris said as he took a step between Daniel and Wesker. He placed a firm, strong hand on Daniel's shoulder. "You're injured and strained. Just relax, you're safe now. Breathe."

None of us are safe with Wesker around, Daniel thought spitefully as he continued to glare against those impersonal shades.

It was Jill who spoke next. Not to Daniel, though. "Captain? Do you know what he's referring to?"

Wesker never took his gaze off of Daniel. Silence slipped into the gathering for a moment as Jill's question lingered. "During our rest break, I studied the terrain of the forest. There is a mansion less than half a mile from this location. Our information suggests it's been abandoned."

"What?" Chris dropped his hand as he turned to face his captain. Consternation grew on his face as he regarded his superior. "When were you going to tell us?"

"When it was necessary," Wesker explained, eyes still on Daniel.

"But Jill's tip said they were headed to the mansion," Joseph said cautiously, confusion playing out over his features.

"Given the vague details, I deemed it unreliable," Wesker said. "We knew for a fact their helicopter did go down and was the more logical choice to begin our search."

Daniel had the distinct impression hostility was building behind those sunglasses. Wesker's tone never shifted from cool and professional, yet something felt off to Daniel. The rest of the team digested their captain's words with varying reactions.

None of them seemed content with their officer's explanation.

"Then," Chris began slowly, "we know our next step. Bravo Team isn't here, and the mansion is close by. We can continue our search there."

"Vickers will return to Raccoon City for refuel," Wesker said. "Private Sims, you will accompany and report to the hospital for treatment."

Daniel wasn't sure when, but he found Jill by his side across from Chris. "That's a good idea. You'll have a chance to recuperate, rest, and assure your friends you're in one piece."

The worst part was the temptation. As his rage subsided as quickly as it had surged, Daniel did feel painful exhaustion. He had eaten little, slept poorly, and taken a beating in the last twenty-four hours. The chance to let someone else take this burden away from him resonated deep within him.

He hated that weakness.

"No," Daniel said. He inwardly winced at how flimsy it had sounded and forced him to say it again stronger. "No. I still have a friend there. You're going to need help. And -, " he cut off as he glanced down at his wounds. And I might be dying anyway. "And I've already come this far."

"You're not part of this investigation," Wesker stated. "You have no authority here. You will board the chopper."

"I'm already a part of this," Daniel countered. "I spent all of last night working with Rebecca, and I'm the only one here who has any clue what things are going to look like at the mansion." Daniel gritted his teeth as he held his ground. "I'm staying."

The soldier and police officer stared at each other for a moment. It was Chris who broke in. "Captain, he does have a point. He's armed and experienced. We might need the additional firepower."

Wesker's gaze never shifted from Daniel. After another moment, Wesker nodded. "Very well. Frost, radio Vickers. Tell him to standby for coordinates. I want him to positively identify the location for our investigation before returning to Raccoon for refuel. Once that's accomplished, he is to fly above the facility, until called for evac."

"Shouldn't he stay parked out here, Captain?" Joseph asked, his eyes confused beneath his red bandana. "Or head to this helipad this soldier mentioned?"

"Can't guarantee security of the landing site."

Joseph glanced at the dead z-dogs around and in the Bravo chopper before nodding. "Yes, sir."

"You," Wesker continued as he stared at Daniel. "Will remain by my side, until ordered otherwise."

All of Daniel's earlier bravado shrank as he realized he would be next to one of the most dangerous men in this world. A protest surged toward his lips, but it tripped on logic. How could he argue against the order? Even if he didn't recognize Wesker's authority, where else would he go? Fighting with Wesker now before Alpha Team realized who they were dealing with was more likely to turn them against Daniel, not against their captain. With a grimace, Daniel nodded before belatedly adding a "Yes, sir."

Joseph got off the radio as the helicopter across the field took to the air. "Message sent, sir."

Wesker nodded, only now taking his gaze off of Daniel. "Chris, take point. Alpha Team, wedge formation. Move out."

Moving with the smooth surety of veterans, Alpha Team shifted and began the march to the mansion. Barry and Joseph assumed their positions on Chris' flanks, while Jill finished the arrow as she fell in off Barry's left. Wesker took his natural place in the arrow's center, Daniel trudging right by his side.

Daniel didn't know if this was the safest he'd ever been or the most dangerous.

A soft hiss filled the air. Rebecca glanced up to see, not one, but four snakes drop from the trees above. "Watch out!" She cried as she scrambled backwards. She didn't make it very far before her back collided with the stone wall.

Richard reacted with the speed of a trained professional. He spun in place, saw the snakes land, and hopped back out of biting range.

Jessica was not nearly as lucky as them.

The three of them had left the residential building behind, overriding Jessica's wish to explore the newly zombie-depopulated bedroom. Nothing but strange noises accosted them as they made their way to the exit. They paused there long enough for Rebecca to grab an emergency blue herb.

The move appeared prophetic as one snake landed on top of Jessica's cowboy hat. "Not again!" Jessica snapped as she danced over snapping jaws toward Richard.

"Don't let them bite you!" Rebecca warned before firing her handgun. She wished she hadn't run out of shotgun shells last night.

Jessica grabbed at her hat, trying to dodge the fangs. "I didn' forget!"

Rebecca cursed how fast the snakes slithered along the ground. Two rounds bounced harmlessly next to their thin frames, but a third smashed a head into pieces. Richard's attention split. He fired one-handed against the grounded serpents, but the other half tried to help Jessica with her snake problem. The result was twice the effort with nothing gained.

"Richard!" Rebecca called out.

His head snapped toward her. Then his eyes locked on the snake rearing back. He threw up a boot as it lunged. Its fangs latched around the hard leather on the boot's underside. Richard repaid the attack by smashing its head against the ground.

Jessica managed to fling her hat and its new passenger to the side. She swung both of her handguns at the little beast and froze with a frown. The other remaining snake lunged at Rebecca, but she hopped out of the way. The snake smashed against the wall with enough force to stun itself. With a quick bullet, Rebecca killed it.

Richard aimed at the last snake, but Jessica hollered, "Wait for it to get off my hat!"

In turn, Richard threw her an incredulous look. "Get a new one."

An unexpected fire exploded out of Jessica's eyes. "There ain't another one like it," she growled with undisguised hostility. Richard blinked in surprise but didn't have long to consider the outburst. The snake, ever seeking its prey, slithered off the hat. Not a second passed before Jessica drilled it and the ground with a flurry of fire.

Pieces of snake flew off new holes. It didn't so much as flinch as it continued its charge toward the cowgirl. It reared back onto itself as it opened its maw as wide as it could. In that moment, a 9 mm round blew its head off.

Jessica grunted with satisfaction. She sauntered over and retrieved her cowboy hat. As she walked back, Richard glanced between her and the headpiece. "Why do you care that much about it?"

She paused and gave Richard a long look. "It was my paw paw's," she mumbled before she started down the path again.

Rebecca eyed her. The odd moment of vulnerability was unusual, and she wanted to take advantage of it. Unfortunately, something was grabbing her attention. "Hold it," Rebecca called out. Her eyes counted all of the spent shells. "I don't think we should fight these snakes, if we can help it."

Jessica spun around with a large frown on her face. "Oh, come on, what's the problem?"

Rebecca waved an arm before her. "We're going through too much ammo. If we keep this up, we'll be reduced to nothing when we run into something much nastier."

Richard nodded, half-surprised. "That's a good call, Rebecca. You're developing a good tactical eye."

Rebecca didn't bother to stop the smile spreading across her face as the compliment took. Jessica rolled her eyes as she started down the path again. "Fine. I'd rather kill more zombies than waste them on some stupid snakes."