A/N: Well, I'm still sick. I am getting better though, just a few sniffles and a coughing fit every so often. The good thing about being home sick while everyone else is gone is that no one yells at me when I raid the fridge for a breakfast of chocolate cake!
Glad so many people liked the necklace idea! I thought it would be something cute for our hanyou to do. He already gave Kikyou a gift fifty years ago, I figured he needed to do something cute like that for Kagome too.
You know what's odd? Whenever I write 'Inuko' I am tempted to write 'Kuro' instead...I wish I could write more about him, but I figured it would get boring if I used the same names and characters for babies over and over again. I mean, sorry, Inuko, but I think Kuro will always be my favorite Inuyasha/Kagome baby I ever wrote...
Chapter 3: Assumption
I don't remember if there has ever been a day since Inuyasha gave me that necklace that I ever took it off. It was something that seemed so sweet for him to do at the time, and it was a small reminder to me for a while that no matter what I began to think of him and Kikyou, there was proof that he felt something for me, right in my hand.
But though I knew he loved both of us, I always thought that I was only second best. I was the reincarnation of Kikyou, and though Inuyasha had asserted several times that he didn't think of me as Kikyou, he only thought of me as Kagome, I still couldn't shake the doubt of his words from my heart. I was certain that he would never forget her, and always choose her over me.
And yet…when he did things like this, it gave me a small bubble of hope in my heart, telling me that even through all the doubt that clouded my feelings, there might be a possibility that my hopes would come true...
When Inuyasha and Kagome went back through the well to the Sengoku Jidai the next day, neither of them spoke of the previous night, especially of the gift he had given her. Like always, they had to act if cute moments like these were easily forgotten, but it was clear to both that this particular moment would certainly not be forgotten very soon.
They climbed up from the ancient wooden well five hundred years in the past, and though Inuyasha didn't speak to her much, Kagome couldn't help but glance at him every so often. It didn't escape her notice that he had seen that she still wore his gift, and would turn away quickly and blush, still embarrassed despite the fact that his gift had been received well.
You know…he's really changed in a year…Kagome thought, watching him as Inuyasha turned away. She remembered when she had first released him from Goshinboku, how he seemed determined to annoy her to no end, and make her leave and forget about ever coming back. Though sometimes she had considered that when dealing with him, she couldn't leave him behind for some strange reason, and she had soon figured out it was because she was in love.
In the beginning, it was like he didn't care about anything, he just wanted to get the jewel shards with me as his "jewel finder", and then be able to wish himself full youkai. Now, he has a lot of things he cares about, though he won't ever admit it…But I wonder, does he still want to become a full youkai?
While Kagome was gazing at him and reflecting, Inuyasha couldn't help but glance back at her, and think about the changes she had gone through as well. She's still wearing it…he tried to conceal a smile as he noticed the seashell necklace around her neck. She really likes it…For once, he knew, he had done and said the right thing.
The first time he had seen her, the night he had woken up from his fifty year sleep, he had thought she was Kikyou. The last person he had seen before he had slept was Kikyou, and it was only natural to believe the girl who had an uncanny resemblance to her was Kikyou. But he had soon discovered how wrong he was.
Even when Kikyou was alive, she always tried to guard her feelings, knowing she was a miko and could not fall in love. And on those rare occasions when she did show him that she loved him, there was still a moment when she would have to step back, and admit that it could go on no further.
But Kagome…she had shown him without restrictions that she cared about him, crying for him, and hugging him when she needed to. She was always so happy, unlike Kikyou, whom he had first been attracted to because he knew she was lonely, as he was.
If he could compare them, Kikyou was a tragic beauty, like a glistening winter snow…beautiful, yet so sad. Kagome, however, was like a summer's day, showing warmth, joy, laughter, making Inuyasha feel happy for perhaps the first time in his life.
Okay, she was annoying in the beginning, he admitted, remembering all those times he had to save her when she couldn't save herself. And I bet she enjoyed her stupid 'sit' command, too. Of course, she still used it when he got her mad, but at least she didn't use it as often.
But now…Kagome had slowly, with her smiles and laughter, worked her way into his heart. Something about her had taken hold, and made him want to always protect her and be there for her. Something made him always want to stay with her. She promised to stay with me. He remembered the day when he thought he had lost her forever, and yet despite all she had come back to him.
Something about her since the beginning had changed, but he couldn't put his finger on what. Inuyasha just knew, that whatever had changed since the first day he had seen her, it had affected him as well…changing him for the better.
While they were thinking, they began to notice that they were gazing longingly at each other, with endless depths of emotion showing in their eyes. They both quickly looked away, with small, pink blushes across their cheeks Of course, some things hadn't changed at all in a year…
No matter what happy times we had at the village, there was one thing we could never forget—Naraku. He was always there, looming like a shadow, over everything. And so, after the short fun we had with my birthday, we soon had to go back into the harsh reality that we were not finished with our fight with Naraku.
Luck was on our side at that time, because we hadn't seen Naraku in a while. After the last time we had fought him, he just seemed to disappear suddenly. Of course, it had only been a few weeks, so we weren't really worried…it wasn't like the time at Mt. Haukurei, where he had been gone for months. We weren't in any danger by his sudden absence.
Or so we thought.
Inuyasha and Kagome walked into Kaede's hut, the hanyou noticing that Kagome had stuffed the necklace down her shirt moments before they drew back the bamboo curtain to meet their friends. She didn't want anyone else seeing this precious secret that they shared just yet.
"Kagome!" The kitsune, Shippou, jumped into her arms as she entered the hut, Kagome returning the hug. Looking around the small, wooden hut, Kagome could see all her friends sitting around the fire in the middle of the hut, like they always did when conferring.
"So now Kagome-sama has returned to us," Miroku the monk said, before glancing back at the hanyou. "Though, Inuyasha, you don't seem to look to happy about this. You're usually relieved when Kagome comes back."
Inuyasha snorted, shrugging it off. "Whatever, monk." In truth, he wasn'toverjoyed about it at all. The small happiness he had with Kagome the night before had been spoiled because they had to go back and search for Naraku.
Sango asked her friend, "So, Kagome-chan, did you have a nice birthday?"
Kagome couldn't help but smile back. "Yeah, I guess." She subtly touched the shell necklace under her shirt, the only one noticing was Inuyasha, who promptly turned away at her implication. "It's hard to believe that its been a year since I first came here."
"The years seem to pass quicker the more you age," Kaede put in, a smile of amusement on the old miko's face.
"You'd know that wouldn't you, withered crone?" Inuyasha muttered, rolling his eyes.
Kagome glared at him and warned, "Inuyasha…" making the hanyou shut up for fear of being sat.
Glaring at him, Kaede responded, "You, of all people Inuyasha, have no right to talk about age. You are hundreds of years older than I am, after all."
"The difference between you and me, old woman, is that I, at least, don't end up looking like that after a few decades," Inuyasha glared, before Kagome stood in front of him to break it up.
"Please, stop, Inuyasha!" Kagome glared, before looking back at her friends, her face changed to a serious tone. "So, any news while we were gone?"
The kitsune shook his head. "Nope. We haven't seen or heard anything."
"It's odd though," Miroku added, folding his arms across his chest while his brows furrowed over his indigo colored eyes. "Usually, there would be some sign of his presence, but now there's…nothing. And even if we could scour all over the land for him, Naraku's gotten too good at hiding his jyaki from us."
There was an uncomfortable silence in their hut as they contemplated their enemy who was possibly becoming more powerful. If Naraku became too powerful, they would never be able to defeat him…Or if they managed to do so, they would probably die as well.
The silence was broken by an arrogant hanyou muttering, "Keh!" All eyes turned to him as he leaned against he wall of the hut, arms folded in his red haori, head down as he muttered to them, "What's it matter? He hid from us once before, and we found him. Well find him again, and this time we'll defeat him!"
If only everyone could be as confident as he sounded. But there was no stopping once the hanyou was determined. He continued, "I'm tired of sitting around here waiting for something to happen! Let's just go and defeat him before the bastard can hide any longer!"
Everyone else in the hut sighed; they should have known that Inuyasha would have acted this way. He was never one to wait around and let his enemies get more powerful when he could be chopping them into tiny, unrecognizable bits. No one spoke until Kagome asked, "So…I guess we're setting out again?"
Inuyasha snorted. "Keh. We've spent too long in this stinking village anyway. We should get moving before Naraku gets any more bright ideas."
"I guess you're right, Inuyasha," Miroku agreed, standing up and taking his clinking staff with him. "Defeating Naraku is our first priority, after all. However, Inuyasha, are you intending to leave today? Where are we to go?"
"Of course we're leaving today!" the anxious hanyou announced. "I figured we could head for the last place we saw him, it might leave us some thing to go off of." All in the hut remembered the last time they had seen Naraku, when he had attacked them out of pure whim, it seemed, since he did not have a grand plan for their demise that time. In fact, Naraku hadn't come up with an evil plan to kill them all in a while, so that only served to make them worry and wonder what plan he was cooking up this time; he never stayed idle for too long.
Grabbing her backpack and standing up, Kagome replied, "Well, we'd better get moving. If Naraku's up to something, we have to get him before he does it."
They set out almost immediately, heading south of the village to where they had last encountered Naraku. Traveling was like it usually was, long days of nothing but walking, or sometimes riding if they had to get there in a hurry. They started out with an easy pace, having no real urgency to get to their destination as soon as possible, and everything was as it always had been; all of them ambling along, gazing at the scenery while talking and laughing amongst themselves, while the hanyou urged them on to find Naraku, of course.
Their travels usually took anywhere from a week to a month, depending upon what youkai were in the area and what condition they were all in to travel. In fact, Kagome was amazed that she could have missed this much school and still be admitted. She knew for a fact that over the past year, she had spent more days out of school than in.
Of course, while her grades deteriorated, her life in the Sengoku Jidai grew, and sometimes it seemed more like home to her than her life in the modern era. She had always wondered if she were meant to live a life other that what she thought she would have lived in the modern world, and there was no doubt that this was it.
But will I always live life here? Kagome wondered. Once the jewel is complete, what then? Will I stay here or will I go back? Glancing at Inuyasha who, like always, was in front of the group, his head held proudly high, leading them onward, she absent-mindedly touched the necklace beneath her shirt. If Inuyasha asked me to, then I would stay here. But if he didn't because he wants to go with Kikyou…then I guess I can still live in my world…
The thought that he might want her to leave so he could be with Kikyou caused her heart to sadden, and gave her a slight twang of jealousy. She didn't want him to go with Kikyou, obviously, but she couldn't help but hope that he would ask her someday to stay with him…but she didn't dare hope that it could be anything beyond that.
She loved Inuyasha, and had shown him on several occasions how much she loved him, and then sometimes he would reveal deeper feelings as well, but Kagome never expected that he would actually love her and want her to stay with him forever as his mate. It just seemed…too unreachable.
It was something that, though she wished for it, she resigned herself to the fact that it would never happen.
A few nights into their journey, after having to sleep on the cold ground with nothing around them but forest, there was finally some comfort to be found. Inuyasha's nose had been successful in locating a hot spring. Naturally, the girls demanded to set up camp so they could get a good bath.
Inuyasha, of course, protested. "It's not even dark yet!"
Kagome was quick to argue with him on this matter. "Inuyasha, I don't care what time of day it is, Sango and I are tired and dirty, and we are going to stay here whether you like it or not!"
"We are not staying here, were going to keep going until we can't go any further for today!"
The other members of the group backed away while Inuyasha and Kagome yelled in each other's faces. It was amazing how, though she normally looked so docile, Kagome could be ferocious when fighting. "It doesn't matter what you want to do! The rest of us are tired, Inuyasha! We can't keep up with your hanyou strength all the time!"
"Keh! I don't see any of them complaining! Right?" Inuyasha whirled around, his amber eyes glaring at the other two humans in the group, hoping for some backup on his position.
Miroku and Sango both avoided his gaze, shifting on both feet. "Actually, Inuyasha," the monk began, "We both are tired as well and would like to rest."
Kagome pointed to her friends. "See?"
Inuyasha folded his arms inside his haori. "Keh! I don't see why you think you need a bath anyway. You don't smell that bad, woman."
But the moment those words left his lips, everyone around them stepped back another step, seeing the scary look in Kagome's eyes. Her glare could probably have shattered glass or leveled a mountain, if she tried it. The hanyou's face became afraid the moment he sensed the chill sent by her glare.
"Er…Kagome, that came out wrong…I didn't mean—"
"Sit!" she roared so loud that their other companions could swear they felt the earth quake, and then down the hanyou went, slamming his face into the dirt with a force that once again shook the land.
Turning her back on the dense hanyou, still face-to-ground, Kagome placed her hands on her hips, walking away. "We're here, and were staying the night, that's that!" And she stormed off towards the hot spring, leaving the hanyou behind.
When the spell finally wore off enough for him to pop his head up, the first words that flew out of his mouth were colorful profanities that no doubt would have gotten him sat again if Kagome had heard them. Miroku leaned over the small crater dug by the hanyou's stupidity, and said, "Inuyasha, I thought you would have known by now that it's sometimes better to keep your mouth shut when you and Kagome-sama are in an argument."
Quite a few more foul swears came from the hanyouas he got up, brushing the dirt off his haori. "Keh. Then that woman would get her way all the time."
Shippou, who was sitting next to Kirara on the ground, rolled his eyes. "Maybe that would be safer for all of us," the kitsune muttered, causing the hanyou to give him a death glare and a deep feral growl.
Shippou gave a small squeak and shot up to hide behind Miroku, while Inuyasha stomped away, his face set in a frown, towards their campsite. Though he had no intention of fighting with Kagome again on this matter, he still thought he had the right to complain about it.
The sky was dark by the time Kagome and Sango could fully slide into the warm hot spring and enjoy their bath. Once the campsite was finally set up, no thanks to the hanyou who had muttered entire time about 'weak, pathetic humans', there had come the small matter of the lecherous monk joking that he would 'protect them' while they 'scrubbed away all filthiness that marred their perfect skin'.
At first the youkai exterminator had slapped him across the face for his comment, but Miroku had to keep going until he got the desired effect. When he assured his betrothed that he was not only looking out for the concern of her, but also for 'beautiful, dazzling Kagome-sama' as well, he found himself quite thoroughly beaten by the hanyou.
And so now, as they looked up at the stars, Kagome folded her clothes in preparation of slipping into the warm water, but her hand fell on the shell necklace Inuyasha had given her before. She wondered whether she should take it off or not. She hadn't told anybody about it…she knew Inuyasha would want it to be their secret between them. But taking it off would be like breaking a promise to him.
Deciding to leave it on, despite the questions she would get from her friend, Kagome turned and stepped down into the warm water, savoring the feeling of a warm bath.
Sango was already leaning against a rock in the warm water, looking up at the sky. Sighing, the exterminator glanced at her friend, before holding a surprised look on her face. "Kagome-chan," she asked. "What's that?"
Kagome glanced down at the necklace that Inuyasha had given her that she couldn't bear to take off. Shrugging and deciding it was no big deal if she told Sango, she replied, "It's a necklace. Inuyasha gave it to me for my birthday."
Staring, Sango barely managed to say, "Inuyasha gave that to you?"
"I don't see what the big deal is, Sango-chan." She folded her arms and looked away, clearly hoping that her friend would drop the subject.
Explaining herself, the exterminator replied, "It's just, Kagome-chan…you know how he is about you…I would have never expected…"
"I know," the miko admitted. "Me either."
There was a pregnant pause as each of the girls stared at one another. "You know," Sango began, "If Inuyasha did this, then it might mean…" she stopped, causing Kagome to be curious as to what she would have said.
"Mean what?" Kagome asked, hanging on to her statement as if her life depended on it. "Mean what, Sango-chan?"
Sighing, she finished, "It might mean that he's finally beginning to admit his feelings."
"His…feelings?"
Shrugging as if it was common knowledge, Sango explained, "How he feels about you, Kagome-chan. Anyone with eyes can see that he obviously loves you."
The miko's heart began thumping in her chest. Love? "I…I don't think its that way at all, Sango-chan. Inuyasha thinks of me as a friend."
Indicating to the necklace that hung at her throat, Sango told her, "Kagome-chan, he thinks of us as friends. You however, are more than a friend."
Waving her arms hysterically in frustration, Kagome blurted out, "I know that! I know I'm a bit more of a friend to him, and I know he cares for me, but I just don't know how much!" Taking a slight pause, she continued, "And whatever he does that's cute, or makes me think that he might feel something deeper for me, I cannot forget that he still loves Kikyou. Whenever he starts getting close to me, he goes back to her, and then I remember that no matter what, I'm second best. I'll always be second best, Sango-chan. And I have to accept that."
Sango watched as Kagome finished, her eyes staring into the murky, steamy depths of the hot spring in sadness, her face forlorn. "Kagome-chan…" she whispered, looking back at her with pity. "You love Inuyasha, don't you?"
Slowly raising her head so her eyes met with Sango's, her facial features still had not changed from their melancholy state.
At first, I was nervous that someone had come to know my deepest secret through sheer observation, and I was afraid that all had noticed it. Everyone, besides Inuyasha, had some inkling as to how I felt about him. Though it was very much obvious, I had never actually voiced my feelings to anyone.
I didn't want to tell her for a second, afraid of so many things; that Inuyasha would find out, she would tell me it was hopeless, or worse, for her to laugh, though I didn't expect that of my friend who I thought of as a sister.
But in the end, I decided to admit these feelings that had been aching my heart for an entire year, in order to release some of the tension on my heart. Sango would keep my secret safe, and I would have one who knew of the pain I suffered every time I was around him…
Kagome looked away slightly as she almost inaudibly whispered, "Yes, Sango…I love him."
The exterminator came over beside her, and placed a comforting hand on the miko's shoulder. "Kagome-chan, you shouldn't look so sad. He obviously cares for you, and it would be no surprise to us if he felt the same way."
"It would be," her friend whispered back, clearly disbelieving in the possibility of Inuyasha ever loving her.
"Kagome-chan, why are you so certain that he doesn't love you?" Sango asked, looking her back in her eyes. "He protects you, cares for you, does everything that someone in love should do."
Shaking her head to keep the impending tears away, Kagome answered, "Because I am second best, Sango-chan. He loves Kikyou. And will always love her. I am only her reincarnation, her replacement."
Sango sighed, knowing that she would not get any more out of her. She stepped out of the hot spring, water droplets flowing off her skin as she picked up her yukata to wrap herself in it. Without looking back at her, she replied, "But Kagome-chan, think of this…I always thought it was impossible for Houshi-sama to ever love me…It shows that sometimes, our hearts are deceived by our own feelings."
And with that, the youkai exterminator left her alone. Kagome still sat in the warm water, glancing up at the stars which she had heard could grant impossible dreams, while her fingers played with the shell that hung around her neck, wondering if such hopes were even possible.
