Lydia was remembering a lot of things that she wanted to forget. She sat at her desk and remembered almost twenty years ago, now.
Lydia couldn't travel to Bella Luna because she had just had a baby and that would be her excuse. She had also just come back from a trip to France and would prefer now to use every privilege and resource she had at her disposal to take time to better understand what she'd learned. She knew something was there but didn't understand what yet. She felt confused but invigorated. She didn't want to fly anywhere but to stay home and close to the Ministry.
She had been called in by Minister for Magic and several other high ranking ministry officials including Kingsley and Rufus Scrimgeour who she knew in passing. Dylan had recommended her to fly and it that recommendation had been confirmed by Kingsley and several other people in the room who had been in school with her when she was Slytherin Quidditch captain. She initially played keeper but after a teammate was suspended for turning a Gryffindor's eyelashes into spider's legs during a class, the positions were rotated and she found that being a beater better relieved her stress and so stayed in that role until she left school.
She couldn't understand why these details would be so necessary especially since telling them the story about her teammate made everyone who was not Gryffindor titter. There was some relief in the room. They needed a flyer. Someone who could recognize a thing from far away, who could multitask and fly fast. She asked where she would need to do and the tension in the room returned. Rufus spoke. The coterie who had flown Fenrir Greyback had not returned. Kingsley dropped his head, his hands were crossed behind his back. He knew how much Lydia hated werewolves. Really, really hated them and also feared them. He didn't dare meet her eyes for what he might see in hers.
Mouse. All of those children. Her own child. She would have to go but something else stopped her. How long had they known. Who else knew?! No one. No one but the people in that room knew. She steadied her breath. And to think she had left her child alone (with his father to be sure) with that terror, that nightmare running loose. When the Daily Prophet ran the transcripts from Greyback's trial, he and every werewolf became the greatest nightmare of every witch and wizard everywhere in England overnight and no one knew where he was? And the escort had vanished.
"You need to send someone from the Federation or a beater from the early 70s." Lydia resolved.
"The bludgers were enchanted so that half of the bludger was black and the other half, if you looked at it from below was the same shade of blue as the sky and if you looked at it from below was the same shade of green as the grass from the Quidditch pitch."
Everyone nodded.
"A seeker would also do." She mused. "Really anyone.", she added under her breath. They shook their heads solemnly.
The particulars of who they could send were decided and a conversation about the flight path and date were underway when someone chimed in with a potential date. Several people made a sound of protest.
"And how would you know when they should leave?"
"The sky will be brightest without it being a full moon. The stars will be-" someone made a sound of disgust.
"Come on!", someone else chimed. "She studies the planets for heavens sake!"
"Don't get superstitious. He is not a werewolf. It's his job to know these things. How many times has he suggested the most auspicious times?" Rufus added gruff and embarrassed for all of them. Someone snorted.
Lydia glanced around. The war had ended, she told herself and yet no one in the room had anything to do with it ending. None of us stopped it, she thought with a shudder. She wanted to go home and after many more raised voices and objections, the meeting finally ended. She felt not unlike a piece of taffy pulled through rotating handles. She put her head on her desk and breathed deeply over and over repeating to herself that the war was over, the war is over. They just needed to get through the trials and find Fenrir and it would be quiet again though she did not know what that meant or even looked like anymore. It had never been quiet and never would be and she was unfortunately smart enough to know that. They could move to Ghana, she thought. Her son could learn about his people and be with his paternal family for some time. They could go to Iceland and live in the dark quiet and fly around all day and raise chickens or whatever they raised in Iceland. Lydia could feel a light headed panic creeping on.
"The war is over!", she yelled at herself in her own head. "That must count for something!"
"Does it?", said another little voice. "There will be another after that and yet another still. Who even ended the war? A baby! A complete fluke! How many war ending babies do you know? How many more babies will it take to end all of the world's wars forever?"
Lydia took a deep inhale and exhaled shivering. She leaned back in her chair. She wanted to hold her son. She wanted her husband. She wondered where and how Philippa was doing. She knew Dorcas was gone. What had the report said. Found dead by wizard in the woods. Lydia felt sick. Mouse. She let the hot tears roll down her face and felt her headache turn into something like a fever. She was too tired now to be angry. She wiped her face with her hands pushed away from her desk got up and went home early.
