Chapter 29

Snape was ready to for the detention by the time Lexie arrived at his doorway after dinner.

"So…" she said, letting herself inside. "What'll I be doing for my detention Professor?" she asked playfully and somewhat hopefully. She walked around her usual table, dragging her index finger around the edge in a seductive sort of way. "Lines? Correcting exams? Re-labeling Potions? Deciphering those hieroglyphics that you call your notes?" she asked biting down on her lower lip.

Snape was still standing at the side of his desk where he'd been when she'd knocked, then opened the door for herself without being told to come in. "Merlin, but she is bold sometimes." He thought to himself.

"You must think I have no imagination whatsoever." He said in his own mysterious tone.

Lexie raised an eyebrow and stopped to look at him properly.

"I have something much more interesting and… personal in mind." He said as he opened the wardrobe behind him.

"And what would that be?" she asked, feeling a sense of foreboding brewing inside her.

"Go back to your dormitory and retrieve your cloak. I hear that the weather is ghastly outside. Quite out of season." He said, without looking at her as he pulled his own cloak out of the wardrobe.

"Yeah… it was storming when I left the great hall… thunder, lightening, the whole works." She said, thinking to herself how odd it was for December. But she did as she was told. Within minutes, she was back, cloak draped over her shoulders and fastened tightly.

"Am… I dressed OK for whatever it is that we're doing?" she asked, opening her cloak so that he could see what she was wearing.

Snape looked over at her. She was wearing a white sweater, he couldn't see all of it, and Muggle blue jeans with the pair of brown clunky heeled shoes that he'd fixed for her earlier.

"That's fine." He said flatly, forcing himself to look directly away and not linger on her features that he enjoyed so much.

And so they left his office, snuck down the hall and out the secret passageway that he'd taken her through the night of the Malfoy party. The moment they stepped outside, Lexie put up her hood. It was pouring. And it was windy. If she didn't know better, she would've sworn that she was in some sort of hurricane.

They squished across the grounds, brown, muddy water squishing up around their feet. When they reached the gate, Snape's hand delved deeply into his robes and brought out his wand, he charmed it open. He put his hand on the small of her back and pushed her through, then shut and locked it behind them. They took a few steps, and then he grabbed her, rather roughly and pulled her into him.

Lexie held on tight. It always felt like she was being pulled like taffy when she apparated. Then finally she snapped back to her own form. She grabbed onto Snape's robes tightly as she stumbled and tried to keep her footing in the sopping wet grass they'd landed in.

She let go of him and turned around to take in her surroundings. Through the rain, splattering in her eyes, she could see the lights of a small town around her, glowing softly in the mist. She turned around and was mystified when she saw a towering church. It's tall, cathedral windows stretched the length of the face of the building. It was topped with a ghostly looking bell tower. It was clear that this church was quite old indeed.

Lexie turned around, flummoxed to look at Snape. "What're we doing here?" she asked, over the pounding of the rain on the pavement behind them where the road ran.

"Let's go inside." He said, ignoring her question. He, once again, put his hand on the small of her back and guided her up the steps and into the sanctuary.

Lexie couldn't even begin to imagine what they were doing here. She lowered her hood and shook her hair out as they stepped into the warm, glowing candlelight of the Catholic Church. There was a table full of glowing candles and beautiful hardwood pews.

Lexie turned around to look at Snape again. He looked rather out of place, but at ease. She was shocked to see him cross himself, respectfully. But that wasn't an issue she wanted to get into tonight. She had a feeling Snape and religion would be a very long story.

"What are we doing here?" she asked again, this time in a whisper.

"Just a moment." He said, watching a door at the back of the sanctuary. It swung open, as if on cue, and an elderly looking nun made her way down the aisle to them. She smiled as she approached with an outstretched hand.

"Ahh…" she said softly taking Lexie's hand. "You must be Alexandra." She said warmly. She had warm, friendly, light blue eyes that smiled along with the rest of her face, not to mention her voice.

"Uh... yes?" Lexie said uncertainly, shaking the nun's hand.

"I'm Sister Stoner." She said kindly as she released Lexie's hand. "And you must be Severus?" she asked Snape, who was standing silently behind the two women.

He nodded curtly before taking her hand.

"I'm glad you got in touch with me." She said earnestly.

Lexie was looking at Snape with her jaw hanging open. What on earth could this be about? Did he think she needed to get in touch with her spiritual side? Did he think this would talk her out of becoming a Death Eater? What the hell kind of a detention was this? Lexie was a very spiritual person, but this whole situation just had her downright confused.

"I've been expecting you." The nun said.

"You have?" Lexie asked.

"Indeed."

"And why exactly is it that you've been expecting me?" she asked.

"Because of your birth parents." The nun said.

Lexie felt her stomach drop dramatically. "You… knew my parents?" she asked, shocked.

"I did." The nun replied. "This is the church that they came to for help, when they knew they had to give you up. I was here the day they came to us. They had you bundled up in a light green blanket. You were only very young… not even a year." She said sadly.

Lexie's breathing was coming quickly. And shakily. This was news she'd been waiting to hear since she was old enough to remember. A twenty-three-year-old mystery. She'd always wondered the reason that her parents had chosen not to raise her themselves.

"Did they… did they say why?" she stuttered. "Why… did they give me up?" she asked, her voice cracking. All the emotions she'd bottled up about her biological parents came bubbling up, uncontrollably to the surface and had nowhere to go except out her eyeballs.

The nun tilted her head and met Lexie's eyes. She looked at her sympathetically. "Oh… dear, I'm sure they didn't want to give you up. They seemed like they were running from something. They were very nervous that day. They kept looking over their shoulders, as though they expected someone to come running in after them." She explained.

"But did they say why?" Lexie asked urgently, tears streaming freely now.

"Only that they couldn't take care of you themselves." The nun said apologetically.

"And now…" Lexie pushed onwards. "Are they around? Are they alive?" she asked anxiously.

The nun paused and pursed her lips, before answering. "I'm sorry." She said softly.

Lexie nodded her head once, then let it drop to her chest. Tears dripped, one after another, down onto her shoe and all over the floor around it. She tensed when she felt Snape's hand on her back. It started at her shoulder and ran downwards to her hip where it came to rest. It would've been nice under any other circumstances. But even now, his touch couldn't take away the pain she was feeling.

It felt as though someone had just ripped her heart out, thrown it on the floor and trampled it. She felt empty, hollow… alone.

"Does she have any remaining family?" Snape finally spoke.

"Actually yes." The nun said quickly, probably feeling as though she had to compensate somehow for being the bearer of bad news. "She has an uncle. It's her sole relative… but it's someone." She said hopefully.

Lexie sniffed. She looked up at the nun. Did she actually think that this would ease any of her pain? Knowing that she had some lousy uncle who hadn't even had the decency to come looking for her?

"Come with me dear… I'll give you the information on your uncle." She said putting her arm around Lexie's shaking shoulders.

Lexie stopped and looked behind them. She extended her hand and looked at Snape. But he shook his head.

"Go. I'll be right here." He said in a low voice. "It'll be fine." He reassured her.

She nodded and allowed the nun to lead her away.

Snape ran his hands through his dripping hair and let himself take in the surroundings. He tried, momentarily to forget about Lexie's rather depressing discovery. Had he known that this would be the outcome, he might not have played his cards this way. He'd played it off as though this would be a surprise, and potentially even given her the impression that they'd be spending some kind of romantic evening alone together. Instead he'd brought her here, without telling her or preparing her, and brought all this pain on her.

A part of him began to feel guilt creeping in. Perhaps he shouldn't have done this. Perhaps she would've been better off not knowing. But another part won out; she was much better knowing the truth rather than being left to wonder for the rest of her night. He'd done the right thing. He just hoped that she thought so too.

Lexie and the nun returned. Lexie didn't look any happier than when they'd left. She turned around and shook the sister's hand once more. "Thank you sister." She said curtly and then made for the door without bothering to put her hood up.

Snape looked between Lexie, walking away, and the nun, standing in front of him. He quickly shook her hand, then hurried out the door after Lexie.

She was splashing down the sidewalk at breakneck speed. He jogged to catch up with her. "Miss Bane…" he said loudly. But just then there was a crack of thunder. Lightening flashed in the December sky, creating an eerie sort of irony. "MISS BANE!" he shouted, louder, more commanding this time. He continued to catch up with her; she was almost at the gate, leading to the street. But she only kept walking. "ALEXANDRA!" he bellowed.

She stopped, dead in her tracks. Her back snapped her up straight. He'd never called her by her first name before. She turned around. "What!" she asked angrily.

"Why are you walking away from me?" he asked, getting angry in his own turn at her emerging attitude.

"Why did you bring me here?" she asked, ignoring his question and asking one of her own. Her voice was strained as she hadn't stopped crying yet.

"I thought you should know about your past. You said at the beginning of the year that you wanted to learn about your heritage and your birth parents." He reminded her.

"Well, you thought wrong. This was a mistake. A big mistake!" she yelled, over the splatter of rain on the sidewalk and the puddles forming in the grass and on the street.

"Why? Because you didn't like what you heard?"

"Of course I didn't like what I heard!" she answered, throwing her hands upward.

"Oh, so you'd rather spend your entire life, living a lie rather than knowing the truth?" he asked, his voice rising.

"Maybe! I was just fine before tonight! I was happy! And look, what did I get out of tonight? My parents didn't want me, so they dropped me off at a church then went off and got themselves killed and left me with no one. And now I'm dying inside… Yeah… this is way better than ignorance!" She cried. "It's one thing for there to be the possibility that you're all alone in the world. It's a whole other thing to know it for sure. I am alone Professor. I'm completely alone."

Snape watched her brush some of the rain-soaked hair out of her face. Her shiny dark brown curtains of hair were now dripping wet and hung limply around her face. But she was still beautiful.

"You are not alone." He said firmly. They were standing about ten feet apart.

"Right, I'm not alone. I've got a foster mother, who's a Muggle, knows nothing about magic and living halfway around the world, and oh yeah, a cat who loves me very much." She said sarcastically, her voice still quaking with tears.

He closed the gap between them in an three long strides. He brought his lips forcefully down on hers, crushing them. He didn't know why he did this. It probably wasn't the right thing to do. But it was too late. He was kissing her. And she was kissing him back. Rain was pounding down all around them but neither of them noticed.

She tasted wonderful. Something sweet, laced with the unmistakable taste of tears. When they broke apart, Snape took her face in his hands. "You have me." He said, not fully understanding what he meant by that, himself.

She looked grateful and contented herself in simply looking at him for a moment.

"I'm sorry." She said, finally. "I shouldn't have yelled at you. I didn't mean it…" she stuttered, the full weight of what she'd just said to him finally hitting her. He'd been trying to do something nice for her, and she'd thrown it back in his face. She knew he hadn't meant for this to hurt her. She couldn't bring herself to look at him. The embarrassment was just too much.

"I'm sorry it hurt you this way. I didn't mean for it to. I just wanted you to know the truth."

"I know…" Lexie said quietly.

He looked at her, staring at the ground for another moment. "Let's go." He said quietly. He wrapped his strong arms around her and apparated.

He guided her back up over the castle grounds and into his office. He took her cloak from her and hung it by the dark, cold, empty fireplace. He looked at her, soaked through and through and took pity on the tiny shivering form. He uncharacteristically gave his wand a flick and a fire sprung up in the fireplace. Another flick of his wand and he'd conjured up a cup of tea.

"Here." He said lowly. "Drink this. You'll feel better." He offered it to her and she accepted.

She sipped it slowly, sitting in a high-backed chair across from his desk. Her legs were curled up underneath her and she was staring into the flames.

"What are you thinking about?" he finally asked, his curiosity getting the best of him.

"Just wondering what its going to be like… with the knowledge that I have no family now…" she said honestly.

"I thought the nun said that you had an uncle?" he asked. That question was another he'd been dying to ask.

Lexie nodded slowly before taking another sip of her tea. "Let's just say that he's not going to be much of a father figure." She said sarcastically,

Snape frowned, but didn't reply.

They sat in silence for quite some time.

"It's late." Snape finally said, somewhat pointlessly.

Lexie nodded again.

"You should get to bed."

Lexie looked at him, then got up and went over to where he was sitting. She straddled him and sat down on his lap. "I don't want to be alone tonight…" she whispered into his ear.