A/N: Woot! 1000 Reviews! Thank you all that reviewd and helped me break my record!
Guess where the lyrics are from. :p
Chapter 49: Watching Over You, Always
How can you go on, when the one thing that drove you on for so long is now gone? How can you live, when the one you loved more than anything is now dead? These were the questions I asked myself in those three long months after Inuyasha's death. Everyday I had to wake up in that room, our room, and realize he wasn't there beside me. Everyday I would walk by the spots we used to meet at, and feel the ache in my heart, knowing he wasn't there to see them anymore.
Was it fate, or just unfortunate circumstances that led Inuyasha to his death? Midoriko-sama said that there was nothing that could have been done about it…he had died five hundred years before I was born, yet I could not help but hold myself responsible. Perhaps if I had never come back through the well when he told me explicitly to stay behind, he wouldn't have had to protect me…and he wouldn't have been killed in the end. I knew if I hadn't come back, then he would have been safe, and would have returned to me alive.
In those three months, I didn't get over my grief, but I learned to live with it. Midoriko-sama was true; I had a child that I would have to be a mother for. I couldn't afford to lose to my sadness now. Perhaps that was the difference between me and the woman of the tragic lover story—she had nothing left to be strong for, but I did…and so I was able to live.
It is true that on occasion, I wondered if I would be with Inuyasha again if I died. After all, it was not unheard of for lovers' suicide. But it was because of the baby I was carrying that I allowed myself to keep going, even when my heart was totally broken.
I thought, after he died, I would be so alone, but that was not the case. Sango-chan and Miroku-sama, though they denied it to my face, decided not to be married until they were sure I was all right. I didn't like being the cause of my friends' putting off their wedding, but I admit, I'm not sure if I could have been entirely happy for them if they had it so soon after Inuyasha's death. Sango-chan came over every day, helping me sometimes, and talking when I needed to talk. Shippou-chan was with me more often that not, almost acting like my own son, but even he felt that I needed some time alone.
Everyone seemed to think that I would want to be by myself, but that was not the case. I wanted someone to be there, to understand…to help me. Sango-chan was with me the most; she had lost her parents, her entire village, her brother, and she knew the grief I was going through. We would sometimes sit and talk about our fondest memories of our loved ones, and sometimes, even though it made us cry at the time, we felt better, knowing we remembered the happy times we had while they were with us.
I visited Inuyasha's grave everyday, because it was as if I could feel him beside me whenever I came. Sometimes I would look down upon the village, on that hill we sat upon so often, and when a gust of wind came by, I would close my eyes, and imagine us flying together…and I could almost feel him around me, holding me, like we used to.
Sometimes it felt like he was always there, watching me. I never specifically saw him, but I knew he was there…A sudden warmth and feeling of safety when I was scared, comfort when I cried…He promised me he would watch over me, and he held to his promise.
Soon, the time came when I would hold to mine.
Kagome leaned her back against Goshinboku, having been lulled to sleep by the warm summer air. Her hand rested n her pregnant stomach, which ever since she had entered her ninth and final month, had grown much bigger, and had begun to move downward. Kaede told her the baby was going to be due soon, and Kagome had spent much of her time near Goshinboku, just to be near Inuyasha and share with him the would-be joy.
She slept a peaceful, dreamless sleep, until, like had happened many times, a well known visitor creeped into her slumber…
"Kagome…" Inuyasha whispered, as he held her in his arms gently. His arms were so warm…so safe. And she felt like she had been lost for so long, coming home into those arms.
"Inuyasha," she replied, clinging on to his haori and holding on to it for dear life. "I miss you…"
His arms tightened around her, holding her closer. "I know…" he murmured, kissing her lightly on the top of her head. His gentle hand slid down to cover her belly. "Kagome," he said, more urgently. "It's gonna happen soon…But don't worry, I'll be here, keeping you safe."
"What do you mean, Inuyasha?" she asked, looking up in his face. Unlike the firm presence she felt being in his arms, his face was much harder to see…it was like a bright light was shining upon it, yet his amber eyes still glowed with the determination and strength they had in life.
He didn't answer; he only replied, "Nothing's going to happen to you, Kagome, I promise…" He suddenly became less noticeable; transparent, and he was getting harder and harder to feel.
"Wait, Inuyasha!" she cried, reaching out to him as he disappeared from her grasp...
"Inuyasha!" she gasped, jerking awake. She glanced around for a few seconds, until she sighed and closed her eyes leaning back against the tree. Was it a dream?
It had to be; after all, she had been asleep…but it felt so real…like she was in his arms again. And his voice was just like she remembered, and that feeling she felt in his arms had been the comfort and safety she had known before.
But what did he mean? she wondered, her hand gently rubbing circles on her belly. He said something was going to happen soon…and not to be afraid…
Kagome looked back up at the blue sky, which was now beginning to get darker as day turned into night. What was he trying to warn me about?
With some difficulty, she managed to get up, rubbing her back slightly; it was aching now with a shift in the weight. Kagome glanced back at Goshinboku, her eyes falling on the light-colored depression in the wood, where she had first seen Inuyasha pinned to the tree all those years ago. Her eyes fell as she turned, and began walking back towards the village, to her lonely life.
She headed towards the hut that Inuyasha had built…the one he had intended to use it for their future family. Her hand remained on her belly, taking comfort in knowing that her child was there.
Kagome walked into the hut, and like always, she felt so alone. Before Inuyasha died, she was never alone—he was always with her, sharing in the joy of their soon-to-be child…the idea that they would be parents. She knew he would have given anything in order to be there for their child, to see the life that they had both created.
Slowly and carefully, she knelt down on the floor, and decided to eat the rest of the meal she had created hours ago, but hadn't eaten fully. She uncovered the pot full of rice and poured herself a bowl, eating in silence.
She had just taken her second bite when it happened.
A knife sharp pain ripped through her, causing her to double over and drop her bowl and chopsticks to the floor, white rice spilling all over. It was gone quickly, but nevertheless, it left her shaking and panting from the aftershock. Kagome let out a hiss as the pain left her, and she glanced down at her bulging stomach. "Maybe I'm getting too much exercise…with the baby," she spoke outloud, hoping whatever happened wasn't serious.
After a minute or two of pondering this, Kagome picked up her bowl and cleaned up the rice, pouring herself some more. She was able to finish her meal, having almost forgotten about the sharp pain, until she had set her bowl down. Another pain, like the first, hit her once more, this time more intense.
Kagome gave a small cry, clutching her belly as the feeling of fire raced through her, and she felt a heavy pressure between her legs. The instant she had that feeling, her eyes widened in shock and she knew what had caused the sudden shock. "Oh…Gods…" she gasped, hunching over as the contraction began to recede.
She was left with deep breaths, sweat beginning to build up on her forehead from the pain and her fear. A thousand thoughts and panics raced through her mind, but the one sensible thought stayed—Get to Kaede's, now!
Kagome wished that what she had decided was easy, but she felt as if all strength had been drained from her. The pain from contractions was far worse that she had expected, and each one sapped her energy even more. It seemed that Kaede was right—a hanyou birth was much harder than a human.
Now, she began panicking when she realized that there was no way she could move herself unaided. Her mind raced furiously. Scream…someone will hear…Before she could scream for help, another contraction shot through her, and she did scream—a loud cry of pain.
Someone burst through into her hut seconds after her scream—it was Sango. "Kagome-chan?" she gasped, "I was coming to see you and I heard—" She stopped her explination when she saw Kagome on the floor, cringing from the pain.
"Sango-chan…the baby is…" Kagome started to say, as Sango kneeled down, but Kagome's words were lost as she gritted her teeth and clenched her eyes shut, trying to block out the fire-like sensation.
"Okay, come on, I'll get you to Kaede's…" the exterminator told her, putting an arm around her and helping her up, slowing as she heard Kagome give a small gasp and clutch her belly. They hobbled slowly out of the hut, Sango giving her calming instructions, "Easy…remember, Kaede said don't fight it; it'll hurt more…"
The contractions weren't close together yet—but every time one struck Kagome, she felt as if her belly was being split open. By the time they got her to Kaede's hut, tears leaked out of her eyes from the pain. "Kagome?" the miko asked, but seeing how Kagome was, she realized what was wrong at once and took charge. "Kagome, lie down on this mat, and stay calm for a moment. Sango, go fetch some water and alert the others." The exterminator grabbed a bucket and headed out, while Kagome needed some help getting down on the futon.
The miko instantly began cutting up herbs and throwing them into a pot over the fire. "How far apart are the contractions, Kagome?"
Her voice was weak as she spoke, "They're not that close together, but when I get one they—" she bit her lip as another one hit her, a small whimper coming from her. "They hurt so much…" Kagome's voice was trembling, and there were tears in her eyes.
Kaede sighed, dipping a rag into the water and placing it on Kagome's forehead. "I was afraid of this. A normal human birth is hard on any woman, but a hanyou birth…And we already know that baby has more powers than we think it does…remember what I told you before."
Kagome's face fell…yes, she did remember. Kaede had told her before after she explained what happened when Naraku was killed that both she and Inuyasha had thought that the baby might die if exposed to great amounts of miko energy…It was one of the main reasons that Inuyasha had decided to leave her behind. Yet even though Kagome had used more miko energy than Kaede thought would have killed the child, it had survived. No one knew the reason, but Kaede speculated that perhaps it had inherited more of Kagome's blood than she thought, allowing her to draw upon both her own power and the dormant powers of the baby as well.
When Sango returned with the water, Kaede warned both women, "You both had better be ready; we're in for a rough night."
And so it went on and on, Kagome crying out whenever a contraction hit her. As hours ticked on into the middle of the night, her tears and screams became worse—it felt as if something were being ripped from inside her. She couldn't imagine anything hurting worse than this.
Occasionally, Sango would leave and inform Miroku and Shippou of the progress, since they were both taking Inuyasha's place in the worrying department. But there was nothing to tell for the longest time; no change, other than the contractions coming closer and worse. As the night wore on, it seemed that only Kaede and Kagome were the ones fully awake—Kaede because she wouldn't allow herself to become sleepy at this moment, and Kagome because she was in too much pain to fall asleep.
Finally, when the sun was beginning to rise, Kagome's contractions stopped temporarily, and she was able to get a bit of a rest. Both Sango and Kaede, despite the dark circles under their eyes, stayed awake, waiting for the hardest moment. While Kagome rested, Sango sat across from her, her head resting against her hand, her eyes blinking more often from lack of sleep. She glanced at the miko and asked, "Kaede-sama…how hard is it for Kagome?"
Kaede sighed, before replying, "A normal human birth is sometimes too much for a human woman, but a hanyou birth, especially to a human, is much worse. Though women do survive…it is very rare."
Sango gaped at her in horror, "You mean to say…Kagome-chan could die?"
"That is a risk in any childbirth, regardless of race. But, deaths of the mother are far more frequent in birthing hanyous, as far as I know. That is one reason you don't see many of them…if the mother dies before it is born, then the baby dies as well."
The exterminator tried to find some way of assuring her friend would live. "But…Inuyasha's mother survived…doesn't that mean—"
"I do not know the circumstances of his birth, but like anything, most of the women survived because they willed themselves to. If Kagome thinks she can do it, and will not let herself back down, no matter what pain she is in, and if there are no other problems, she will live. But a woman who cannot overcome the pain, and who think they cannot do it will most likely die…Like many life-or-death situations, one can be saved if they will themselves to live."
Sango was going to argue once more, but they were turned away from the conversation as they heard Kagome gasp, jerking awake. Her childbirth pains had started again, this time more frequent and painful.
Kagome screamed as a contraction hit her, gripping the futon so hard that her nails punctured holes in it. It left her quickly, leaving her pale and gasping for breath, the sweat pouring off her. Sango wiped her forehead with a rag, but it was not enough, another pain hit her soon afterward.
But this time, instead of the usual bloodcurdling screams, she didn't think as she yelled the first thing that came to mind, "Inuyasha!"
Whether she was delirious or in too much pain to care, Sango did not know, but when Kaede announced that the baby was coming, it seemed that Kagome was lost in one endless, tormenting fit of pain. Her head thrashed around, her hands squeezed the pallet so hard that it ripped, and her wails became pleas of mercy. "Inuyasha, please, help me!"
Kaede sensed danger instantly as Kagome continued to cry out for her dead lover. "Kagome, calm down! You must be calm! If you keep fighting it, then you won't be able to survive!"
But Kagome didn't hear her; she couldn't hear her. It seemed that every youkai with claws had decided to rip at her belly, pulling and making her feel like she was at the verge of death. The pain intensified as she felt something being ripped from her very being. "Inuyasha!" she called once more, this time louder and more desperate than before..
"Kagome…"
Her screaming stopped, and she lay still a moment, before daring to open her eyes, which widened upon seeing the one sitting next to her. Inuyasha, her Inuyasha, was next to her, smiling softly down at her. He wasn't quite as she knew him—it was as if a bright light was shining upon him, but he was there. He had come. He would protect her, and keep her safe.
"Inu…yash…" she tried to say, but she was too weak to form words. She heard Kaede say something to her, but she couldn't hear her, not now.
"Don't give up now, Kagome," Inuyasha told her softly. "You're stronger than you think…Show me that strength…" He extended his hand to her. "You can do it."
She cringed once more and closed her eyes as she felt a pain pass through her once more, but this time, it wasn't as bad as she thought. For a second, Kagome was afraid to open her eyes, and find that it was all a hallucination, but when she did, Inuyasha was still there.
She remembered his words; he thought her stronger than she had ever thought herself to be. He believed in her…she needed to believe in herself, too. Slowly, she reached her shaking hand to him, taking his warm, loving hand.
Sound came back to her all at once. "Push, Kagome!" Kaede told her urgently. Kagome squeezed Inuyasha's hand, shutting her eyes and giving a sharp, piercing cry as she felt something being ripped from inside her, feeling like her whole body was going to burst—
And then it was over. She gasped in relief as her grip on Inuyasha's hand went slack, and she heard a shrill baby's cry in the hut. "You did it, Kagome," Inuyasha smiled, kissing her lightly on the forehead.
Kagome wanted to reach up and hold him, to let him hold her and feel safe in his arms once more. Even after all this, she still needed him, and needed him greatly. "Inu…yasha…" she said, her voice barely a whisper. "Inu…ya…"
And then she collapsed into a faint.
When Kagome flickered her eyes open, she was still in Kaede's hut, but it was obvious some time had passed. The blood had all been cleaned up, and she was now lying under a blanket, and also the sun was much higher in the sky than she had last remembered. When she came to, Sango was nearby, smiling at her.
"How long?" Kagome asked, having only the strength to move her head.
"Only an hour," Sango told her. "It's all right, you needed it."
Even though Kagome felt extremely tired, she wasn't content with that. She tried to sit up, but Sango began to worry, "Kagome, lie down, you shouldn't get up…you used a lot of your strength, and you need time to build it back up to what it was."
"Where is it?" Kagome demanded wearily, glancing around the hut.
The exterminator glanced at her quizzically. "Where is what?"
"The baby." Her voice sounded raw, slightly afraid.
"It's here," Kaede said, turning around with a bundle in her arms, and smiling at her. Sango helped Kagome sit up, by leaning against the hut wall, as Kaede handed her the bundle. Kagome instantly felt tears in her eyes as the incredible feelings of motherhood washed on her. This was her baby. Her own child…to love and to raise. She couldn't help but smile as she touched the soft cheek with her finger.
Her eyes filled with tears, not just because of the baby, but also because of the way it looked. It had snow-white hair, beautiful, expressive amber eyes, and its father's ears. The baby was the spitting image of Inuyasha. It's his baby…she thought, blinking away tears.
Kagome unwrapped the baby slightly to see if she had a son or a daughter. "A boy…" she murmured, glancing back at her baby's face, his amber eyes, taking in everything around him. "It's Inuyasha's son…" a small smile found her face, while she wiped away the tear that had fallen on her cheek..
We have a son, Inuyasha…she spoke to no one, hoping that he would hear. But somehow, through the happy feeling she felt in her breast, she knew he did hear her.
While Kagome was marveling over her child, Sango and Kaede spoke quietly in the corner. "She's so weak," said Sango, glancing at her friend who was still deathly pale.
"She just gave birth to a hanyou," Kaede explained. "It's not something just anyone could do."
The exterminator turned away, remembering the moment when she was afraid Kagome wasn't going to make it. "Somehow, she got the strength. I didn't think she would, but somehow, near the end, she did it."
Kaede smiled slightly as she looked back at Kagome, who was still trying to wipe the happy, relieved tears off her face as she looked upon her baby for the first time. "Kagome is an amazing child, or I suppose I should say amazing woman now…she has always been able to do things no one could have expected her to do."
Glancing back at Kagome, Sango caught her attention by asking, "Do you have a name for him, Kagome-chan?"
As Kagome looked down at her baby, she remembered Inuyasha had wanted to name it after himself, and now that it was a boy that looked exactly like him, there was no other way to go. "Inuko," Kagome replied, smiling at the mewling child. "Inuyasha's child."
I was so weak after the birth, that it took me weeks to fully recover. But it was worth every minute, for Inuko. I think I can truly say, that he saved me from the depression I was headed into without Inuyasha. I now had a life I was responsible for…I couldn't be sad with that to take care of.
I was able to smile again—I smiled at my child as I played with him, I smiled at Sango-chan and Miroku-sama's wedding with my new baby on my hip. But every smile had a limit, and though I could be somewhat happy, I could never be truly happy again.
It was hard, raising a baby on my own and having to be a single mother, but somehow I managed. Even when Inuko wouldn't stop crying in the night, and I was on the verge of tears, I didn't give up. This was Inuyasha's child, and for him, I wouldn't let myself sink into despair. Inuko became the light in my life from that moment, I laughed when he laughed, I smiled when he smiled. And sometimes I cried tears when he came running to me, saying that children wouldn't play with him, because he was a hanyou.
Inuko was my joy, my happiness. The only one I had after everything that once made me happy was gone.
"Wow, that's amazing…" Sango exclaimed, after Kagome finished speaking about how the Miko had seen the Hanyou during the birth of their child. "Did the Miko really see him?"
Kaogme couldn't look her in the eye when she answered. "She thinks so, Sango-chan. But she can never truly know." At first, Kagome had been reluctant to speak of such a private moment, since she had kept it to herself for such a long time, but, like always, keeping secrets wasn't something she liked to do.
"Did the Miko ever see the Hanyou again?" Sango asked, making Kagome sigh, and glance down at Inuko resting in her lap.
Inuko was five months old as Kagome rocked him to sleep, softly singing a song she had heard in her time, what seemed years ago;
Time flows into my heart,
And truthfully,
Our every day is soon a memory,
Love and dreams may be things forgotten
one day, but, my wish is to be warmed.
Four seasons with your love,
Within my heart.
She finished the song just as Inuko was asleep, and she decided it was time for her to rest as well. Inuko slept in her bedroom for now, so she could hear him in the night, and so she crawled over to her futon, and closed her eyes, hoping to find sleep soon.
But just as she was just drifting off, it seemed that a bright light had been lit in the room, behind her. She tried to ignore it, but it soon became impossible to ignore. Perhaps it was Shippou coming to visit—she had said he could come whenever he wanted, but this was much too late.
Kagome rolled over, expecting to give a certain kitsune a sharp reprimand, when she gasped loudly at who she saw. "Inuyasha!"
Inuyasha looked like he hadn't expected her to be awake as well. "Kagome!"
They stared at each other for a moment, lovers who had been torn apart by death, before Kagome asked timidly, "What...what are you doing here?"
Inuyasha paused, the light that seemed to shine on him obscuring his expression. "I wanted to see my son."
Kagome paused for a moment, before nodding, "All right…" she slowly crawled out of her bed and next to the cradle which Inuyasha had made before, looking down at the sleeping Inuko. "I…I named him after you…what you wanted."
"I know…" he replied, his amber eyes lit in sadness. "It's hard to believe this is real…I have a son…" Inuyasha gently reached out one of his fingers, gently touching the soft skin of their baby, before Inuko's eyes shot open, locking onto him.
"He was awake…" Kagome said outloud , before following the trail of Inuko's round eyes. "He can see you?" she asked curiously.
"Of course he can," Inuyasha replied, with an almost proud look on his face, before turning back to her. "Can I hold him?" he asked, looking almost frightened that she would say no.
Kagome nodded, "You don't have to ask…he's your child too."
Slowly, Inuyasha reached his glowing hands into the cradle and gently picked up the baby. By the way his movements were carefully planned, Kagome guessed that he had never held a baby before. When he had Inuko in his arms, who was gurgling back at him, that look of amazement and happiness that Kagome had seen so many times erupted in Inuyasha's eyes, to an intensity she had never seen before.
Inuyasha held the baby for a moment, before handing it back to her. Kagome didn't know what had run through his mind during that time, but she didn't think he would tell her if she asked. Inuko was already falling asleep again as she set him back down in the cradle, and faced Inuyasha, who now, despite the light that was coming from him, looked a bit glum.
"I have to leave now," he explained, making Kagome gasp.
"What?" she demanded. "Why?"
"I only came because I wanted to see my son," he explained, looking away and hating the pain he was causing her.
"But what about me?" Kagome was nearly on the verge of tears. She nearly stopped herself from running into his arms, afraid he wouldn't hold her like before. "Why didn't you come to see me?"
"I didn't need to see you," the hanyou told her, glancing back at her. "I've always been here for you, couldn't you tell? I only came to see and to do what had been denied of me in life."
At his last words, tears fell down her cheeks in Kagome's eyes. "I was so stupid!" she sobbed, trying to wipe the tears out of her eyes. She clenched her fists and slammed one down on the floor as another sob came from her.
"What are you talking about?" the hanyou asked, coming closer to her with a worried look on his face.
"If I hadn't been so stupid and come back, then you might not have died, Inuyasha!" she cried, but soon felt Inuyasha wrap his arms around her, holding her once more. Though she was happy to be back where she belonged, that couldn't stop her tears. "I'm so sorry…I wish that I hadn't—"
"Kagome, it wasn't your fault that I died," he explained softly, feeling her melt into his arms, ending her resistance. "It happened because of circumstances we couldn't control. I know you feel guilty about this, and you need to stop. You have nothing to blame yourself for, Kagome."
"But why did you have to die?" she asked, holding on to him for dear life. "You didn't deserve this…and I need you, so much Inuyasha."
He buried his nose into her hair, and her scent washed over him once more. "Kagome, don't worry about me, I'm fine…and besides, I promised to always watch over you, didn't I?"
That sounded more like a farewell than she would have liked. Kagome pulled away from his chest a bit. "Inuyasha?" she asked, glancing upward. "Inuyasha!' she cried, as she realized he was fading away.
Without him to support her, she fell back on to the futon, in the same position she had been before he had shown up. Inuyasha had left her behind again, and wasn't there when she needed him anymore. And the worst part—like this, she couldn't tell if it had been real or a dream.
Kagome glanced back at Sango, and shook her head. "No, never after that."
There was a pause before Miroku cut in, "So, is this the end of the tale?"
She nodded, "Yes, the Miko had her child, and was able to live without the Hanyou, but never without his memory. Their love story was over, but his legacy would live on, in their child."
"Does this mean that there's another hanyou like me without a Papa?" Inuko asked, making Kagome look back at him with pity.
"Yes, Inuko, that's right."
No one spoke after her words, and Sango and Miroku began to rise, changing the subject. "Well, it's late," the monk began, glancing at his daughter, who was asleep in Sango's arms. "And we should be getting home."
Shippou stood up as well, "And I think I'm kind of tired too." It was obvious that they wanted to leave her alone before she broke into tears once more, but for once, she wasn't complaning. After the story, she felt like she needed to be alone now.
Kagome removed Inuko from her lap and told him, "It's time for bed, Inuko. I'll be there in a minute." Inuko nodded, and then trotted off to his room as Kagome rose to send off her guests.
Shippou and Miroku left after goodbyes and left, but Sango smiled and told her, "It was a wonderful story, Kagome-chan."
"It didn't have a happy ending, though," she replied, looking at her with sad eyes.
"Perhaps it will one day," Sango replied, with a hopeful glance before following her husband back to her hut, leaving Kagome behind to glance at Goshinboku in the distance.
She had already visited Inuyasha's grave for the day, and didn't have the time to do it now, but she spoke the words into the wind, hoping he would get the message. "Well, Inuyasha, I did what I said," she smiled sadly. "I lived on…I raised our child…I lived with your memory, teaching him all about who his father was…"
Kagome paused for a moment, before adding, "I miss you, so much..." and turning back into the hut.
When she walked into Inuko's room, and saw her little pride and joy, he was already asleep, no doubt tired from the long story. She leaned down and kissed his forehead lightly, whispering, "I love you, Inuko…" before heading back to her room for some time alone at last.
In the corner of the room that she and Inuyasha once shared was his red haori, no longer smelling like him as it once did. It was fairly wrinkled, but it was still intact; still a memory of him. Tessaiga was next to it, but she reached for the haori and pulled it towards her as she sat upon the mattress, burying her face in it and crying tears she had held in for hours.
She had only been crying for a few minutes when something changed. Her heart leapt as she felt those phantom arms encircle her once again. "Why have you come?" she asked, her voice soggy.
"You needed me," the soft voice of Inuyasha replied, holding her gently.
"I need you all the time!" she cried, abandoning his haori and using his chest to hide her face in. "Why can't you stay here always?"
Holding her closer, Inuyasha told her, "You know I can't do that, But you needed me tonight, I could see when you told the story."
"You were there?" she asked, not daring to look up at him, lest he be a dream.
He nodded, his chin resting against her head. "I was…it was a beautiful story, Kagome. But you know…I told you before, it wasn't your fault."
She sniffed, fisting her hands in his haori, a duplicate of the one now discared on the floor. "I know…but it feels like it…"
"Keh," he replied, before whispering to her, "I told you that you were strong, I said that you could live without me, and look at you. I know it hurts; it hurts me too, but you raised our child like I asked…you gave him a life that I never had at that age…Kagome, you are the strongest person I know. Don't let yourself think that it was your fault when you clearly know it wasn't."
Kagome sighed, and snuggled against him, before she felt the familiar sensation of him leaving her. "I have to go now,"
Her head shot up to look at him. "No, wait, Inuyasha—!" But he was already gone. She stayed still for a moment, shaking slightly as the tears came and spilled down her cheeks, before she collapsed on to the bed and cried like she had so long ago.
