Padmé found Obi-Wan in the Jedi Temple gardens, when she went to visit him the next day. He was kneeling in the soft grass under a tree, his eyes closed and his face relaxed. He seemed to be in deep meditation, thus she moved to a nearby stone bench as silently as she could, not wanting to disturb him.
She was close enough to observe him, and her heart constricted. He was thinner and paler than the last time she had seen him and more silver had crept into the hair by his temples, and the furrow on his brow was deeper.
The pain of his loss was etched deeply in his features, and Padmé dreaded the moment he would open his eyes, afraid to find them dull or devoid of life.
She could not even imagine what he had gone through. She had lost her husband, but Obi-Wan had lost everything. His home, his friends, his way of living. He was now the last of the Sith, for Qui-Gon had informed her he had given the surviving children back to their families, or transferred them to the Jedi when it had been impossible to track down their parents.
Finally Obi-Wan resurfaced from his meditation, and when his eyes met hers, she was relieved to see they still sparkled with his inner self.
"Senator Amidala," he greeted her with a bow of his head.
"Obi-Wan, please, don't call me so. We have passed through many things together to be so formal."
He nodded, "Yes, Padmé." He put his hands flat on the ground and used his arms to help himself back to his feet. He then retrieved his cane from where he had posed it against the tree trunk, and limped to the stone bench she was sitting on. He lowered himself at her side and looked calmly at her.
There was a moment of silence before she asked, "How are your legs doing?"
Obi-Wan shrugged his shoulders. "They lack coordination and sometimes they buckle under my weight, but at least they allow me to walk around without needing a hoverchair."
"What do the healers say? Will they heal?"
"They don't know. There is no reference about similar cases in the archives. They are optimistic since there has been some progresses, but they cannot say if they will continue to improve."
"I am sorry," she murmured.
"Why? It is not your fault."
Padmé looked at him intently. "I am sorry about everything. About lying to you years ago; about not listening to you after Geonosis; about the end of the Sith Order; about not having been near you when you learned the truth…you-you are a wonderful man, Obi-Wan, and deserved much more than life gave you," she concluded in a rush, her emotions having the upper hand over her control.
Obi-Wan sighed deeply as his eyes flashed. "Thank you for caring. It means a lot to me. I was afraid you would not want to be near me again after I had killed Anakin."
Padmé swallowed hard and briefly lowered her head to look at her hands. "You did what you had to do, and by what Qui-Gon and Yoda explained me, you did not kill Anakin, but a man called Darth Vader. Anakin was already dead by then."
Obi-Wan nodded, but said nothing. Silence fell on them, but it was not uneasy.
"Obi-Wan, may I ask you something?" Padmé said after a while.
"Of course."
"Why are you willing to marry me and recognize my children as your own? It is just because you feel it is your duty to the Republic?"
Obi-Wan looked at her for a long while, his blue-grey eyes intent. "Partly. I believe you are the right person to lead the Senate during these difficult times, so it is my duty as Sith Master to help you to do your job at your best. But I also thought that since it is important you marry, you might have preferred do it with someone you know and, I hope, are comfortable with rather than with a stranger. Of course I will never pretend there is more than friendship between us, and I am ready to step aside should you have someone else in mind."
Padmé nodded, then blurted out, caught by an impulse, "And what if I should want more than friendship?"
Obi-Wan sucked on his breath and his eyes turned smoky grey. "Do you really need to ask?" He murmured throatily, "I thought you knew I never stopped loving you."
Padmé lowered her eyes, unable to stand his hot gaze. What had possessed her to ask him something like that? Was she fishing for reassurances?
"I-I… Obi-Wan, I am touched by your words, but I don't want…to raise false hopes in you." She finally said, meeting his eyes again. "I care deeply for you, but I cannot offer anything more than friendship just now. I loved Anakin and I am mourning the death of the young man that stepped into my life three years ago. I need time to recover, to sort out my feelings, to think of my children, to-"
Obi-Wan stopped her flood of words posing two fingers over her lips. "Peace, Padmé, you don't have to justify yourself. As I told before, I am willing to stay by your side as your friend, for the rest of my life if necessary. I don't want anything else but to see you and your children happy, safe and satisfied. Nothing more, nothing less."
Her eyes blurred at his total unselfishness and generosity. She did not deserve him—she never had. But she knew she was too selfish to let him go. She would accept his offer and become his wife and then, maybe, when the time was right, she would be able to give him the happiness he so deserved.
§
Padmé and Obi-Wan married two days later, inside the Jedi Temple, with Bail Organa celebrating it as Qui-Gon and Yoda posed as witnesses. It was decided to backdate the marriage to three days before the twins' birth, so that Luke and Leia would be considered to have been born in wedlock. Watching the way Obi-Wan looked at her children, Padmé felt certain he would prove to be a wonderful father, stern but doting, and the perfect man to teach them how to use the Force. Oh, yes, because Padmé had decided that her children, their children, would one day be two Sith like their father. It had been her wedding gift to her husband to be, one that had brought tears of gratitude in his eyes.
As for herself, Padmé was emotionally conflicted. On one hand, she was happy to be Obi-Wan's wife, on the other she was saddened by the circumstances that had led to her marriage. She could not ignore that if she was married to her first love it was because her other love, her Anakin, was dead.
Padmé could not shake her feeling of guilt. If she had not been so stubborn, if she had not allowed Anakin to get so close to her that his attachment became obsessive and unhealthy, then, maybe, he would still be alive. Or maybe Palpatine would have found another way to corrupt him; after all he had been interested in Anakin since he was a child.
"Padmé?" Bail Organa's voice brought her back to the present.
"Yes?"
"Are you ready for tomorrow's ceremony?"
"As I could ever be," she said with a nervous smile.
"Don't worry too much. I know you will do a wonderful job."
"I hope so, Bail, I really hope so. The stakes are too high to allow myself to fail," Padmé commented, looking out of the window at the Senate Arena.
§
The day after his marriage Obi-Wan watched as Padmè accepted the Office of Supreme Chancellor of The Galactic Republic from the Jedi Council in front of the Senate.
A thunderous applause exploded as she formulated her vows of loyalty to the Republic and promised to govern with honesty, justice and democracy.
Then her aide restored the order inside the enormous dome, as Supreme Chancellor Padmé Amidala Kenobi addressed the congress for the first time, introducing the guideline of her government.
Obi-Wan only half-listened to her speech, for he had already heard it the previous day. Instead he concentrated on studying the Senator's reactions to the words being said.
Many of the Senators, those closer to Palpatine, had been replaced and he had had an active role in the negotiations with the various star systems' local rulers. He was pretty sure they had purged the Senate from its most corrupted members, but he planned to keep all of them under control. It was his duty, as the soon-to-be-appointed Chief of the Intelligence, but he would have done so even without an official role.
Obi-Wan loved the Republic as much as he had loved the Sith Order and loved his wife.
His wife. A smile spread on his bearded face and, for the first time in ages, it reached his eyes. He still had to get used to the notion Padmé was his wife. It was a dream became reality, even if the circumstances behind the wedding were far from happy.
The destruction of the Sith Order weighed on his heart and probably would for the rest of his life. It seemed almost inconceivable that one thousand years of traditions and faithful service to the Republic had been blown away in one night. Yet, it had happened.
Obi-Wan remembered the horror he had felt when he had walked among the still smoking ruins of the Temple and felt the echo of the men, the women and the children that had died there. His damaged legs had started shaking uncontrollably and had crumbled to the ground, face down in the ashes, unable to stand up again. Force only knew how long he would have remained there if Qui-Gon had not come to search for him.
Obi-Wan smiled as he thought of the Jedi master—the best friend a man could ask for. Qui-Gon had been supportive the whole time, despite the fact that he too had suffered greatly. It was thanks to their shared meditations that Obi-Wan had been able to regain some peace and was now able to look at the future with a certain degree of optimism.
He now had a wife and two children to love and care for, and he looked forward to doing it. One day…one day in a distant future he would have to tell Luke and Leia about their real father, but he was not worried about it. He was confident that when the time came, Padmé and he would be able to explain why they had arrived at that point.
Obi-Wan did not really feel guilty about having killed Anakin Skywalker. Yes, he had been saddened by the loss of such a promising young man, but he had done his duty. He had killed a Dark Lord—and would do it again.
He was only sorry for the pain this had caused Padmé and Qui-Gon. If only he had realized sooner who Palpatine really was. If only he and Qui-Gon had taken literally what Dooku had said to his former apprentice when he had held the Jedi master captive on Geonosis about the Republic being under the control of Darth Sidious. If only-
Obi-Wan closed his eyes and released his regrets into the Force. It was useless to dwell in the past. He had to look only forward: to his job, to raising Luke and Leia to be the next generation of Sith, to the teaching position given him in the Jedi Temple and, of course, to being near Padmé for the rest of their lives. For now that he had her, he would never let her go again. He would not be able to bear it.
Another, longer applause made the Senate dome almost tremble and Obi-Wan returned to the present, adding to the clapping, as Padmé turned in his direction, searching for him among the crowd until their eyes met and locked and only the two of them existed.
