Chapter 18:

Hurting Inside as well as Out

"Im sure he though I was gonna die and she had put a comforting hand...I hope."

Mai said in the hut touching her throat.

"But that's what I only want to believe."

She said as tears threatned to fall.

"I did take Inuyasha from her I should of never stayed at Kagome's house the moment I saw him."

She said walking back to the futon and sat on the futon and had out a hand over mouth and started to cry.

"Why do I hate myself I should just kill myself."

She said crying still.

"Can someone take away my pain."

She said holding herself.

"I feel so alone."

She said leaning against the hut wall.

"Death keeps running through my mind is it because Im thinking of my parents."

She said wandering why all there thoughts suddenly came to her.

"Am I tired."

She said.She then got up and walked out the hut everyone saw her as she walked past them and to a lake.Inuyasha was still holding Kagome's hand.She went to a lake and cupped her hands getting water and splashing it one her face.She fell back on the ground looking at the stars.Sesshomaru came and sat next to her.

"You know its not good to keep things locked up inside you."

"You heard me."

She said looking at the moon.

"Every word."

"I can't hide things from you...you have great hearing."

"Its not just that."

She looked at him.

"What do you mean?"

"Your eyes look broken."

He said looking up at the moon as well.

"Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't exsist."

She said closing her eyes.

"You have people who need you for instance my brother."

"Inuyasha seems like its Kagome who he needs."

"So you saw."

"Yes and I don't want you to tell me what happened If Inuyasha really cares for me he'd tell me."

"I suppose your right about that."

He said getting up.

"But I doubt he will."

He said walking away.Mai opened her eyes.

"He doubts it."

She said.