A/N- Here's the next long awaited chapter to Magic Tricks! Hope you enjoy it!
Chapter 3- News to Me
Batman stood.
"Well, obviously, we need to contact this Dumbledore. How do we do that, Alfred?"
Before the butler could answer, a brown tawny owl flew past them and landed beside the Batcomputer's keyboard. Tied to its leg, which it was holding out to them, was a roll of parchment.
"What is this? How does an owl get into the Batcave?" Batman asked, outraged.
"The same way the bats do, sir. And this is owl post. The Wizarding world's answer to a mailing service," Alfred explained as he took the letter from the owl, patted its head, and gave the parchment to Batman.
The owl flew away, ruffled, as he unraveled the note and read:
Dear Mr. Batman,
Since I am unable to reach you by Muggle telephone, I have decided that this would be the best approach. I hope Regis didn't scare you.
Perhaps Alfred has made you aware by now that Harry Potter has been kidnapped. We believe that the Joker was responsible. We know that he was responsible for the deaths of the three Muggle relatives of Harry.
It is vital to the survival of Wizarding world that Harry Potter be found alive. And unharmed, of course. It is my understanding that you were responsible for the recent attempts of rehabilitation of this fiend. I would like to ask you to find Harry and return him to us.
Sincerely,
Albus Dumbledore
Batman turned the letter over, as if expecting more, but when there was none, he turned to Alfred.
"What just happened?" the Dark Knight asked.
"Stay with me, sir. This boy, Harry Potter, is the only one to defeat the Dark Lord Voldemort. It was prophesied so. You need to save him. It is imperative!"
"Gee, I'd love to, Alfred, but I don't know where he's at, at the moment! And I've got nothing to go on."
"Sir, it's the Joker. He's got to be in an abandoned fun house or candy factory or something."
"Yeah, there's only fifty million of those things! Why do contractors keep building these things? Does this city look like the kind that wants a fun house?"
Alfred's face seemed to sink.
"So, you're not even going to try and find the boy?" he asked.
"Well, of course I am. I'm Batman. But, how do you even know he's in Gotham, if he had to go to England to get this boy?"
Meanwhile, in the fun house in Gotham City…
Although he was still restrained to his chair, Harry had been moved closer to the T.V. This of course was after hours of Harley tossing raisins at him, trying to land them in his mouth. So that turned into hours of "I'll get it this time."
After a while, she had gotten bored and left the room. Joker had entered shortly after and started watching television. Harry, whose back had been toward the set, started to complain.
"I can't see! What's going on! What actress is that? I recognize that voice!"
And he had persisted until he was put into his present position.
Hours of Pokemon later, Harley reentered the room and snatched the remote from the Joker.
"Harl…do we remember the last time you took the remote from me?"
"Puddin'…look at this!" she said, switching it to a news channel.
A newsman in a blue suit was shuffling papers. Finally, he cleared his throat and said, "In other news, across the pond in Surrey, England, three were found dead on Saturday morning. Forty-six year old Vernon Dursley, a prominent drill manufacturer and member of the community, was murdered along side his wife, Petunia--forty-one, and their only son, Dudley--fifteen. The gruesome scene led investigators to believe that this may indeed be the work of a serial killer. Presently, police are searching for a missing fourth member of the household, a teenage boy by the name of Harold Plotter…"
Harry looked at the Joker in horror.
"You killed them…"
The Joker snatched the remote back and quickly changed the channel.
"You killed them! You monster! You vile, vile, murderous monster! Why…what are you watching?"
Harley glanced at the boy with a raised eyebrow. However, the Joker paid this sudden change of attitude no mind.
"It's called Spongebob Squarepants. Do you like animation?"
"I don't know. I never got t watch a lot of T.V. when I was young."
"Why not?"
"Dudley would beat me if I tried to watch it with him."
For the first time, for a split second, the Joker looked solemn. Then as his smile returned, he said, "Sucks for you."
"Well, he is dead now…"
He playfully slapped Harry's knee.
"Well, I did you a favor then."
Harry didn't reply. He remained in thoughtful silence as the cartoon began.
End Notes- Yeah, we know it's short. And we don't own Spongebob, that belongs to Nick cartoons or Pokemon, I think this belongs to WB. Did you like it? Please review!
