Logan had seen Rory naked thousands of times, but as the doctor lifted her shirt to expose her small bump, Logan couldn't help but avert his eyes. He felt like he was invading her privacy. There was an awkwardness in the air, the warmth and familiarity between them gone. They were more like awkward strangers than two people who were expecting a baby together. "Friends" wasn't a good fit for them. . . they were so much more,Rory was the mother of his child for crying out loud. To cheapen Rory to "friend" status. . . or even worse a crude throw away term like "baby mama" physically hurt Logan. The ultrasound tech moved the wand across Rory's belly, and a steady beat filled the room shaking Logan from his thoughts . Suddenly all the animosities, and the fight that was beginning to brew between them was gone. Logan glanced over at Rory. "Is that. . . ""
Rory smiled. "That's the baby's heartbeat."
Logan felt tears beginning to form, and he tried his hardest to choke them back. "The baby's heartbeat. My baby's heartbeat."
"Is this your first ultrasound Dad?" The technician asked.
It took Logan a minute to realize that she was talking to him. He was "Dad". He nodded, not wanting to speak and interrupt the steady sound of his child's heartbeat.
"Well then you'll really love this." She turned the screen towards him and Rory, a small black and white blip moved across the screen. "Say hello to your baby."
Logan's entire face lit up, his body swelling with so much pride he might burst. Reflexively, he reached down and grabbed Rory's hand, giving it a tight squeeze. He knew it wasn't right but his hand just found hers, fitting perfectly within each other.
"So the baby's ok?" Rory asked sheepishly, every nerve in her body screaming at the touch of Logan's hand on hers. .
The woman nodded. "The doctor will confirm everything, but you can relax, the baby looks healthy."
Rory exhaled, not realizing that she had been holding her breath. It was amazing that she could care so much about someone that she had never met, someone no bigger than a plum.
Rory turned to the sonographer. "Is the baby really moving around like that? I don't feel any kicks or movement at all."
She nodded, "They're pretty active! They're just a little peanut right now, so you most likely won't feel it. Being a first time mom, you probably won't feel any fetal movement until about eighteen to twenty weeks. Rest while you can, this one looks like a soccer player!"
Logan smiled. "He must take after me."
Rory smiled, the thought of a miniature Logan delighted her.
The tech did a few more measurements and snapped a few pictures. She turned off the machine, much to Rory and Logan's dismay. They could watch their baby dance across the screen all day. She gave Rory a rag to wipe off her belly and stood up. "Ok guys hang tight, and the doctor will be in to see you."
The tech flipped on the lights as she left the room. Rory and Logan were suddenly all alone, their close proximity glaringly obvious. Logan glanced down at Rory's hand in his and quickly let go, his heart racing wildly. "Rory. . . I. . . "
"Logan, about what I said in the first aid tent. . ."
He brushed her off. "I told you those differences don't matter anymore. I'm here for you. . . and for the baby."
Rory crossed her arms defensively. "Logan, no. .. . "
Logan glanced up at her, hurt gleaming in his eyes. "You don't want me around?"
"I'm not saying that. I'm saying don't make decisions based on me, only the baby. I am not in a place to have a relationship, My life is messy enough as it is. I'll let you be as involved or uninvolved as you want to be, but please Logan, I'm begging you, do it for the baby, not for me. My dad came and went my whole childhood. As I got older, I realized, it wasn't really a relationship with me that he was after, but more a relationship with my mom and I don't want that for this baby. So if you stay, stay for the baby."
Logan's brow creased, his lips curled tight as he mulled over Rory's words. He sighed, running his hands through his thick blonde hair. "Rory, I want to be there for this baby, in whatever faucet you'll let me. That's my child, I'm a father. I'm here for them."
Rory could feel the electricity between them, the room practically on fire from the spark, and she was absolutely petrified. She had heard all these lines before. For as long as she could remember, her dad came and went as he pleased, feeding her mother similar lines to what Logan was saying. She didn't want the relationship between Logan and the baby to resemble her and Christopher's in any facet of the imagination. If Logan was going to be in the baby's life, she wanted it to be a real, genuine relationship.
A knock cut through the tension between them, the moment quickly fading. Tony, her boss from the campaign trail, popped his head in. "Hey Rory how ya doing?"
Rory sat up, quickly switching gears. "Tony!"
Tony walked in, eyeing Logan suspiciously as he entered the room.
"Tony this is my. . . my friend Logan."
Logan stood up, shaking his hand. "Logan Huntzberger."
Tony shook his hand, "Logan Huntzberger? Of THE Huntzbergers?"
Logan grimaced. "In the flesh."
Tony shook his hand exuberantly. "I'm a big fan of your fathers."
"Wish I could say the same."
Tony turned his attention back to Rory. "Heard you gave everyone quite a scare! Are you ok? Do you need anything?"
Rory shook her head. "I'm fine. Just the heat, and I'm dehydrated."
"And you're pregnant?" Tony said nonchalantly.
The color drained from Rory's face. "I. . . "
He motioned towards Logan. "Lauren said your friend that carried you to the first aid tent, mentioned that you were pregnant."
Rory shook her head slowly. "I am. I'm due February 10th. "
Tony pursed his lips, humming methodically while he thought. "Do you feel like you need some time off?"
Rory could feel the bile rising in her throat, Tony's words churning her stomach. "Time off?"
"The campaign trail is grueling. Long hours, constant standing, extreme heat. . . it's a lot for your body, even without being pregnant."
"You can't fire me because I'm pregnant!" Rory screeched, the room suddenly spinning.
"Rory, no one said anything about firing you. You're one of our best reporters. All I'm suggesting is you take a small break, go home and relax a bit, gather your bearings."
"I agree with him. A break might be good for you." Logan interjected.
Rory shot Logan a cold look, almost giving him frostbite. "I can't take a break! He's got the big four tour soon, and that three day press event in Iowa next month. . ."
Tony's tone grew more stern. "We're not asking you Miss Gilmore. We can't have our reporters passing out, it's a liability. Go home, rest up, and you can rejoin the campaign trail after your baby is born. You'll be ready to go just in time for the March primaries."
Rory shook her head, her whole body on pause while her brain played catch up. The press tour was over for her, Well at least until she had the baby.
She nodded, still in disbelief that this was really happening. "I understand, but just know I will be back as soon as they're born. I won't take my full six weeks, I'll. . ."
"Rory, we will worry about that when the time comes." Tony said standing up. "Don't worry, your spot is saved, please just try to relax. Everything will be ok, I promise you."
Logan grinned. "Trying to get a Gilmore to relax is useless."
The doctor knocked on the door, poking his head inside.
Tony patted Rory gently on the shoulder. "Ok I'm gonna get back out there, the news waits for no one! Please call me if you need anything. It was nice to meet you Logan."
An awkward presence blanketed the room as Tony left. Rory made small talk with the doctor, rhythmically nodding and mumbling in agreement every so often, but Logan had sat, silently in the corner, the warmth and happiness of the room gone. Logan knew by the look on Rory's face her stoic exterior was just a facade, and inside she was falling apart.
…
Rory pushed open the doors of the hospital, the steamy dry heat smacking them in the face as they exited.
Logan chased after her, impressed by her speed. "Rory, wait! We should wait inside. It's too hot out here for you."
"Here, two of these are for you." She replied ignoring his concern as she carefully ripped the strip of ultrasound pictures, handing Logan 2 frames.
He glanced at the grainy black and white images, a smile once again spreading across his face.
Rory huffed her way over to a bench, praying that the shade would have some much needed relief. The heat was intense, making her stomach roll, but she couldn't go back into the hospital, afraid that she would burst into tears at any minute and cause a scene.
Logan made his way over, sitting next to her silently.
Rory gathered all of her strength, shaking away the flurry of emotions that was waging war in her head. "Logan, can I ask you something?"
He nodded. "Anything."
"If you're so into being in this baby's life, why did it take you three weeks to contact me?"
Logan bit his lip, trying to figure out the right thing to say. He had a million thoughts running through his mind, but couldn't bring himself to spill his guts to Rory. His father was crappy at best, Logan raised not as a "son" but as "an heir". Sure, from the outside, Logan oozed confidence, but the doubt that he could be the substantial father figure this baby needed was consuming him whole. "I needed time. I'm sorry, but that letter. . .I was trying to make sense of it all. Your letter hit me like a train Rory! I needed time to process."
Rory crossed her arms defensively. "You needed time to process? Like all the time you gave me to process moving to california and marrying you?"
"You're going to throw that in my face?! That's not even fair! This is a baby Rory! A baby! I'm going to be a father and in case you don't remember I don't have exactly the best role model for that job! Who do I choose to be like? My workaholic father who only saw me as an heir to his empire, or my chain smoking mom who runs away to the spa anytime life threw anything real at her?Logan yelled angrily, causing the scene that she was trying to avoid. " I'm sorry if it took some time to wrap my head around the idea of being a parent, when a nanny was the closest thing I ever had! I'm low-key freaking out here. You may have it all together, but this is a big change to my life."
"Your life? You're not the one who has been up before the sun for the past month and a half throwing up anything and everything she eats. I've not been able to stomach a cup of coffee since the stick turned pink, do you remember what coffee is to me? And now I've lost my job? I worked so hard to get here Logan, I didn't have my daddy to push me through with his connections! Out here on the campaign trail? This is everything I've ever wanted and now I have to 'take some time' because of this baby. Not only that, but without that job how exactly am I supposed to pay for everything this baby needs without a job? I can't just fall back on my trust fund like you did! This baby has shaken my entire world Logan! Not only did I not have time to process, I didn't have a choice! so sorry if I'm not being very fair." Rory's face was red, a mix of the heat and anger.
