The next morning Kim convinced my mom to make waffles with extra syrup, even though breakfasts like that were usually reserved for weekends. I rode to school with her and Jared. He tried to talk a few times but she glared at him so menacingly that it made him shut his trap before he could muster out anything substantive about wolves or vampires or imprinting. We mostly sat and listened to the radio.

When we got to school I couldn't help but spot and stare at all the other wolves. I knew now that they were all part of it. My eyes locked on Embry as he leaned over the water fountain. I couldn't stop gazing at Jacob Black and Seth Clearwater as they walked together, chatting in the hallway. I eyed Quil but wouldn't speak to him in Geometry. And Paul. At every turn I seemed to see Paul, but some part of him knew not to approach me. Not yet, too soon.

During lunch I plopped down next to Caroline. I fiddled with my food but couldn't eat any of it. A few tables away were Paul, my sister, Jared and a few other "pack" guys, munching and staring at us.

"If you want to sit with them, it's fine Mal," she said to me looking back in their direction.

"No!" I exclaimed. "I don't... I mean it's complicated. I kinda got into… not an argument, but it's just complicated right now...with Paul."

"Have you spoken to him about it?"

"No,"

"Why not?"

"I don't know, Car. It just seems like a lot,"

"Look, I'm not encouraging you to date him. I really don't get it at all, Mal. But you've never been one to be afraid to face the music," she said plainly.

This is pretty fucking scary, I thought.

I breathed out and looked at Paul who was facing me. His amber eyes stared at me with a burning hunger that I could feel throughout my whole body. Also, based on Kim's description of shapeshifting, I was pretty sure he could hear everything I just said.

Caroline and I talked about TV shows the rest of lunch and it was a welcomed distraction. I tried to keep my head down the rest of the day. He didn't bother me, even though it probably pained him to keep distance.

The next few days followed the same formula. Kim made sure I was well fed and emotionally attended to. My friends helped to distract me without picking me apart over my boy drama because they were real friends. Paul, begrudgingly, gave me space and the rest of the pack seemed to follow his lead. With this I blissfully ignored any action at all and swam in indecision.

About a week later on a Friday I woke up to find Kim still asleep in her room an hour before school. There were tissues all around her bed and a wet compress on her forehead. She was passed out and breathed heavily.

"Kim's sick, sweetie," My mom said as I made my way downstairs, "She was up early this morning, but she has a fever so I sent her back to bed. She texted Jared and he said he will still give you a ride to school and take you home." My face twisted at this. Be with Jared? Alone?

"It's fine mom. I can walk or ask Caroline to give me a ride today…"

"It's done, Mallory. Just accept the ride. It's not that big of a deal," she said as she passed me a cereal box. Easy for you to say, I thought.

I had spent quite a bit of time in Jared's truck. Generally when he let Paul borrow it, and lately with Kim when he shuffled us both to school. I hadn't ever been in it just with Jared, and I hadn't been only with him for any considerable amount of time ever. Thank god it was only a 15 minute ride to school.

My feelings toward my sister's boyfriend also felt confusing. In truth, his past behavior was never as menacing as Paul's constant hitting it and quitting it. Jared was the pretty boy — male model type — that could get away with any obnoxious behavior due to his looks. This repulsed me. I thought Kim was so shallow in her pursuit of him. I mean what was he besides beautiful and athletic? I even asked her this before they got together and I gladly answered for her: Likely an asshole, undeniably an imbecile.

It was like he didn't have to grow or advance his personality at all. He could just flash a smile or make sure girls got a whiff of his intoxicating pheromones and then all doors opened for him.

But since he started dating Kim, he seemed less black and white, at least in a sense. And there was one undeniable trait that he now espoused, one I could fully understand: a ferocious loyalty to his friend.

"Uh… thanks for the ride," I said to him as I slid in his truck on the ride to school.

He looked at me intently, not having any of my pleasantries. His eyes narrowed at me as his hands gripped the wheel. He was serious and annoyed. Where was that smiling idiot and who replaced him with this 6'5, aggrieved shapeshifter?

"Do you love Paul?" He asked, his eyes penetrating through me, trying to read my face and body language for an answer.

"Well, hello to you too…" I let out, with a chuckle, trying to lighten the mood.

"Cut the shit, Mal. Kim won't let me say anything to you when she's around, so I'm gonna use my time here wisely." I was silent as he backed out of my driveway. I wasn't afraid of Jared or his wolf, Kim made it clear they wouldn't hurt us, but I was surprised by his forwardness.

"I'm serious. He can't stop thinking about you and it's slowly killing him to think that you're rejecting him," He spat.

The muscles in my face tensed. So we're making this all about Paul now? Jared's aggression started to irk me. It was like he, and Paul by association, were throwing a temper tantrum. Two spoiled pretty boys so used to getting what they wanted from women, throwing a fit when it wasn't going their way.

"And why do I have to know right this instant Jared? Because you and Paul are beautiful people who are used to getting all the girls you want when you want them and you can't stand that you're not in control here?"

"What? No. The only girl I want is Kim and the only girl Paul wants is you…"

"Oh, of course, that's right!" I said sarcastically. "Because of of weird wolf love magic."

"Mallory, it's not like that," he said as he ran a hand through his hair, "I mean I think imprinting speeds it up a bit — but I am pretty sure I would have always found Kim, if I was lucky enough. Same with Paul and you. The Gods showed us now because we need it."

Need it. Did he need this? Need me? Did I need him?

"I mean, you know how you feel, Mal. What's making you want to reject him?"

I huffed out a bunch of air.

"I'm not rejecting him. I… I do… I mean I definitely care about Paul. But this is some pretty crazy shit. I'm just trying to figure out how to navigate it all and how I fit into it. I mean Kim always loved you, so it made sense for her to jump on board. But I've always hated Paul. This whole thing is a complete 180 for me."

"Kim didn't always love me," she said in monotone.

"What?" I was aghast. If I knew nothing about my sister, I knew this."Yes she did Jared, I was there, she thought you were a beautiful Greek god and was crazy about you and pined after you secretly for…"

"You can't love a person you don't know, Mal. Just like you can't hate a person you don't know. Kim fell in love with me when I fell in love with her -- together. You didn't hate Paul before because you didn't know him. Not the real him. But now you do." I was silent.

I did know him, passed through my thoughts as clear as day.

"Now I do," I repeated.

"And?" he said pointedly. I gulped. I knew how I felt, my whole body screamed for him, but my head kept getting in the way. I didn't answer Jared's question or speak at all for the rest of the ride.

I thought about our conversation the whole day at school. I ate my lunch in the library and hardly said a word to anyone.

I did know Paul. He was so much more than the bad boy womanizer. And as much as I hated to admit it, Jared was more than a beautiful idiot. They were real people and full of gray. And within that they were teenagers going through something inexplicable. Called by our ancestors to Protect. And somehow, someway I was determined, destined, to be part of that. A part of Paul. I felt a lump in my throat and didn't go away for most of the day.

When the final school bell rang at the end of the day, I pushed open the double doors and was never so relieved for a weekend. I made my way to Jared's car. As I walked forward I saw Paul climb onto his motorcycle, clean shaven and unsmiling. His amber eyes sparkled in the sunlight.

My feet stiffened at the sight of him. The last time we spoke was when I met his wolf.

My whole life I convinced myself that Kim was the apprehensive sister and I was the fearless one, but here I was scared and immobile. I felt such a pull toward Paul. I physically felt things when I touched him, but was frozen to embrace it. But maybe, maybe I could be brave and allow myself to feel it.

I took out my phone to text Jared.

Mallory: Going to ask Paul for a lift. You can leave without me.

I walked over to Paul.

"Hey," I said, delicately. He whipped around to face me.

"Hi, Mal," warbled out of his mouth.

"Um, could you give me a lift?" He nodded yes quickly, his head bobbing up and down like a buoy.

He handed me his helmet and climbed on. I climbed on after him, wrapping my arms and legs around him. I was still freaked out, still afraid, but if I was honest with myself, I wanted to be with him and near him and I didn't want to fight it anymore. As he felt my arms and legs hug into him his whole body relaxed.

"Can I take you somewhere, beside home?" He asked softly before we set off.

"Okay," I breathed into his ear, my hands stacked on top of each other, firmly holding on to his abdominal muscles.

We pulled up to some cliffs. Kim had told me that Jared, Paul and the rest of them went cliff diving, but seeing the actual cliff was pretty intimidating. It was also really beautiful. Paul took off his jacket, put it on the ground and motioned for me to sit on top of it. He sat next to me and we sat there together for a little bit, gazing at the blue ocean, surrounded by evergreens and jutty rocks pointing out. The sound of the waves crashing was so peaceful, almost as peaceful as Paul's presence next to me.

I sat criss-crossed, and he with his legs outstretched and crossed at his ankles. As we looked at the scenery, I wanted to touch him, something inside me craved it. I brushed my hand upon his, gingerly. He gently clasped my hand, sandwiching it between his and breathed out, almost in relief.

"Do you want to talk about last week?" He asked, carefully.

"Okay," I breathed out. "I think I'm ready to do that,"

"That's not how I wanted to show you, Mal. I'm sorry you had to see that. Kim and Emily have never seen us attack a vampire. I'm sure it was pretty frightening,"

I nodded in agreement.

"So, what's it like? To be supernatural?' I asked him.

He smirked. "Sometimes the enhanced senses are cool, sometimes they're annoying. I like being part of the pack, but it can be awful to be in everyone's head. Vampires suck. I like running when I'm a wolf...and being connected to you."

He looked at me, eyes shimmering.

"Kim and Jared said they told you more about imprinting," Jared. He must have known about my conversation with him this morning. I nodded again.

"And, how do you feel about the whole thing?" He asked aching to know.

"Well, It makes a lot more sense to me now. Why you wanted to spend time with me, why you started behaving differently… I mean, but is it real Paul? Are you just drugged under some spell?"

He shook his head no. "Don't feel drugged in the least. If anything I feel like I've been snapped out of all my bullshit."

"But aren't you upset that you don't have a choice, Paul? I mean why me and not Shalie, Maddie, Candance or a million other girls that you've had a connection with?"

"No," he said confidently. "It makes so much sense that it's you. It's like I've been masquerading like a selfish, destructive asshole for the past few years and now that I'm linked to you, I can finally take that costume off. I don't think I could do that with anyone else, Mal. I'm so fucking grateful to you. I don't know what you get out of this fucking deal, but…"

What did I get out of it? What did I get out of it?

I knew the answer.

"Oh," I jutted in. "Well, I think. I mean I know it's still early and soon, but, um. I think I might… Well, actually. I am scared of it, really…"

Stammering? Why are you stammering?! You're brave. Be brave, I told myself.

"Well, what I get out of the deal is, well, I think I might actually love you Paul. For the first time ever. I get to love you and… I think…"

"Be loved by me," he said boldly, finishing my sentence.

I breathed out, shaking my head with tears in my eyes. At this he crashed his lips into mine and I felt heated all over my body. He pulled me closer to him and I fell on top of his body. His hands ran through my hair and caressed my back and it felt so incredibly right. Tears ran down my cheeks at the sensation as I melted into his body, fully and completely.