A/N: Sorry I forgot to post yesterday - I fell asleep between the twins' dinner and mine, threw off my schedule, and just didn't think of it until this afternoon.

Ch 20

When Danny woke up the next morning, he squirmed closer to Sam and looked at her carefully. She was still asleep. He scrambled off the foot of the bed instead and looked down at himself as he got to his feet. He needed a new diaper, definitely. He unzipped his pajamas and sat down on the floor, wriggling out of them. It was too hot with them on anyway, and much more fun like this.

He pulled at the little tabs on his diaper until he got those off as well, and got to his feet triumphantly. He ran over to his diaper bag and pulled out a fresh one, unfolding it and holding it up. Okay, this part he needed help with. He looked back over at Sam, and was about to go wake her up when he heard Jack and Teal'c up and moving around in the rest of the house. They would do. The doorknob took some work, but he got it open, very proud of himself.

He trotted down the hall and found Jack in the den. "Dack help me!"

Jack looked up from the toys he was cleaning up and burst out laughing. Danny was running towards him waving his diaper like a banner. "Okay… you know, it doesn't say anything in your personnel file about your exhibitionist tendencies. Come here."

Jack put the diaper on and asked, "Is Sam still asleep?"

"Yup."

"Wow, and you didn't wake her up? Good job, little buddy."

"Tea?"

"He's taking a shower. Are you hungry?"

"Yeah."

"Okay, let's go find something to fix everybody for breakfast. And… considering how much laundry you've been creating lately, you can just eat like that. We'll put your clothes on later, since you seem to prefer being naked anyway."

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Jack peeked into the guest room, surprised that Sam had stayed asleep so long, since apparently Danny hadn't closed the door behind him when he got up that morning. She was curled up under the covers in a little ball in the middle of the bed, apparently taking advantage, in her sleep, of having the bed to herself without having to worry about squashing the toddler sleeping next to her. One foot was poking out from the mass of covers.

"Uh, Carter? You awake?" he called in a low voice. The foot didn't move. He entered the bedroom quietly, glancing down at the discarded pajamas and diaper on his way to the bed. "Carter? You in there?" He sat down on the edge of the bed and studied the lump of covers for a moment.

He ran a fingertip along the bottom of her foot and it was promptly jerked back underneath the comforter with the rest of her. He chuckled and patted her leg - or where he estimated her leg would be based on her foot's previous location. "Come on, Sam, wakey wakey eggs and bakey."

After a few moments of silence, she called, "Really?"

"Ah, you are under there somewhere. Yeah. It's all ready - Danny and Teal'c are already digging in, actually. You can sleep if you want but cold eggs are pretty gross, so…"

"No, I want to get up…" She fumbled under the comforter for a moment, getting untangled, and finally emerged, propping herself up on one elbow, rubbing her eyes with the other hand, and looking at him uncomfortably. "Um, Jack?"

"What?"

"Could you move your hand?"

He looked down at the hand he had patted her with and his eyes widened as he pulled it back obediently. His estimation hadn't been quite right, apparently. Hey, it was hard to tell with all those layers. "Sorry. I'll uh… go save you a seat at the table."

She watched him retreat quickly and kicked off the rest of the covers in annoyance, flopping back onto the bed for a moment and staring up at the ceiling, giving herself a full ten seconds to think about how weird this whole situation was. She sighed and rolled off the bed.

On her way to the bathroom, she stepped on the diaper Danny had discarded. The cold, wet diaper that he had left face up. She swore loudly and tried to shake the diaper off of her foot, but the sticky tab was stuck to her heel and it wouldn't come loose. Extremely grossed out, she started hopping on the foot that did not have pee on it or a diaper stuck to it, stumbling into the hallway, where Jack was coming to see why she had felt it necessary to expose Danny to such colorful language first thing in the morning.

Preoccupied with her own problem, she hopped right into him and crashed to the floor. He tried to grab her and keep her from falling but he was too slow - he'd been taken by surprise when she hurtled out of the guest room straight into him. She lay there on the floor in the hallway, the wind knocked out of her, looking up at him.

Jack looked back at her curiously, trying to look sympathetic, but there was an amused twinkle in his eyes that he couldn't get rid of. It was an unnecessary question given the fact that she had a diaper stuck to her foot, but he had to ask it anyway. "What happened?"

"Wet diaper. I stepped on it."

"Oh no. I uh… sorry. I meant to get that but I was kind of… leaving in a hurry…"

"I know."

He peeled the diaper off her foot and rolled it up to properly dispose of it. "You're having a rough morning," Jack said sympathetically, grabbing her hands and pulling her to her feet - well, foot.

She hung onto his arm for balance, not wanting to put a urine-covered foot on his carpet. "It's okay," she said, taking a deep, resigned breath. "I must have had too much relaxing yesterday." Jack figured bringing up the fact that she'd been vomited on last night wasn't a good idea, so he kept his mouth shut and helped her hop-walk to the bathroom.

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Sam found the rest of her team in the kitchen after she spent a good five minutes scrubbing her foot. Teal'c appeared to be about halfway through a huge plate of eggs, as well as who knew how many pieces of bacon and slices of toast. Danny had egg on his face - in the literal sense. He was insisting on feeding himself, with his fingers.

"Hi Sam!" he called cheerily when he saw her enter.

"Hi Danny. Thanks for the present you left in our room, that was just lovely."

He looked at her blankly. Jack chuckled. "He's smart, but I don't think he gets sarcasm yet, Sam."

"He's been around you for a few days now, it's probably starting to sink in," she responded, smirking at him for a change. She turned back to Danny, who still looked confused, and asked him a question he could answer. "Whatcha got there?"

"Eggies," he said, offering her a slobbery handful of smushed scrambled egg particles as she sat down next to him.

"Ah, that's okay, you eat those, I'll just get my own," she said quickly, taking the plate Jack passed her with a smile. "Thanks, though."

As they worked their way through breakfast, Jack asked, "So what does everybody want to do today?"

Danny shrugged and picked up a toast triangle slathered with jam. "Pway?" he suggested.

"We could play here, or we could try to think of something fun to do," Jack said. "I was thinking of the zoo."

"The zoo?" Sam asked skeptically, as Danny exclaimed, "Zoo! Zoo!"

"See? I knew if he liked the talking pig he'd like the zoo."

"I'm sure he'd love it, s… Jack," Sam said carefully. Danny was already bouncing in his seat as much as he could. "But he couldn't even stay with my one little cat for more than a couple of hours without having a major allergy attack."

"Oh, yeah."

"No zoo?" Danny asked, visibly deflating.

"Maybe if we gave him some allergy medicine before… but you're probably right."

"Well, he's all excited now, though," Sam said, not wanting to disappoint the little guy. "Hey, I just remembered something that would be perfect!"

"What?"

"This place we took my niece and nephew when they visited… it's about half an hour from here, it's called the Rocky Mountain Dinosaur Research Center, or something like that. It's a museum and lab and a bunch of other things… Mark's kids loved it."

"Dino-saws? Yeah, wet's go!"

"That settles that. Do you remember where it is?"

"I think so, but I could go look it up on the internet to be sure."

"Sounds just boring enough to me to mean that you and Danny will love it," Jack said with a smile, getting to his feet with the plate. "Although…"

"What?"

"Well, it just sounds like this is going to take up most of the day, and I thought you wanted to spend half of it working," he said innocently, knowing that since Danny was already so excited, she wasn't about to back out now.

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