Chapter Two: Boys Have 'Em Girls Don't

Still traveling towards the next Dragon Ball, Bulma and Son Goku are about to turn in for the night.

"Hey, we only need four more balls, right! That's gonna be a snap!" Son Goku asked over the roar of the new motorcycle.

"A 'snap,' he says!" Bulma mumbled, "I guess you wouldn't know it, living your whole life in the armpit of the world... but there's a lot of ground to cover out there!" Bulma explained.

"I'm starvin'" Son Goku stated.

"It's getting dark, too. Let's call it a night." Bulma said, slowing the motorcycle to a crawl.

When the motorcycle stopped Son Goku hopped off saying, "I get the soft leaves for my bed!"

"...As if. Do you really think I am going to sleep outside!" Bulma said, reaching into her pouch, and extracted a small plastic case full of her 'hoi-poi' capsules.

"What else? I don't see no houses around here..."

"Capsule time!" Bulma proclaimed, and looked through down into her 'hoi-poi' case.

"No way! You're not gonna pop a house outta those whatch-ama-callits!" Son Goku asked.

"Please..." Bulma said, pulling out a capsule. "They're 'hoi-poi' capsules. That looks like a nice level spot..." She cocked her arm, "Better clear out monkey boy!"

Son Goku ran off into the distance.

"HOI-POI!" Bulma exclaimed, throwing the capsule. A large cloud of smoke appeared, and when it went away a large house was sitting in front of the duo. "Ah! How lovely!" Bulma sighed. Well? Still lusting after those leaves?" Bulma asked Son Goku.

Son Goku was completely flabbergasted. When he recovered he pointed his nyoi-bo at her and yelled, "A-are you s-s-sure you're not a witch!"

"Cold enough to come in yet?" Bulma asked, not paying attention to his comment. She walked in said, "CLAP ON!" She clapped and the lights flashed on.

Son Goku cautiously stepped into the 'hoi-poi' house, said, "WAK! You are a witch you turned night into day!"

Bulma sat down and said, "You don't even know about light? You have a long way to go Tarzan..." She got up and walked overt to a televison and turned it on saying, "Watch this!"

The televison turned on to a music channel. Son Goku watched with absolute amazement, Bulma merely laughted.

"Hey, get outta that box, you midget!" Son Goku said, using his nyoi-bo to tap the screen.

"Yurrgh... You're stinking up the joint..." Bluma said with fingers clamped over her nose. "You're taking a bath before we eat!"

"'Bath'? What's a 'bath'?" Son Goku asked.

"EEEW, you're kidding!" Bulma screamed, pulling away from Son Goku.

Minutes later Son Goku was stripping the last of his clothes and Bulma was waiting by the bath saying, "Guess I gotta help you. C'mere!" Son Goku walked into the bathroom completely exposed, and Bulma screamed at him, "Will you at least cover up!"

Now Son Goku was in the tub being cleaned by Bulma.

"Wh-what's that? It feels weird!" Son Goku said, questioning the soap on his head.

"Oh, shut up! Do you know how many guys dream of me giving them a bath!" Then she mumbled, "What a waste of my babeitude..." Bulma grabbed the showerhead and washed Son Goku's head of soap. She then turned him saying, "...okay, other side." Pulling Son Goku's tail up she said, "What an idiot! You actually attached this stupid, phony tail to your butt!"

"What phony tail?" Son Goku asked.

"Take it off! It's in the way!" Bulma commanded, pulling on Son Goku's tail.

"OWW! Don't pull!" Saying this he snatched the scrubber in Bulma's hand, said, "I can wah my own butt!" He started washing his butt and said, "How'm I doin'?"

Bulma being shocked by the discovery that the tail on Son Goku's butt wasn't fake she let out a loud yell that pierced the air, "EEEEYAAA!" She raced from the room and was sitting on the bed when Son Goku came out, "Y-y-you r-r-really h-h-have a t-t-tai...!" She stuttered.

"I din' think you'd be surprised..." Son Goku said dying his head off. "–Oh, right! You don't have one HUH? Guess it's just guys."

"Guys have...? No, No, they can't...! But.. It's not like I've really seen a guys naked butt before..." Bulma thought to herself, then said out loud, "I knew they had something in the front, but..."

"But wait a minute... my dead grampa was a guy... but he didn't..."

"You see! You see!" Bulma exclaimed. "Normal guys don't have tails!"

"O'course, grampa was kinda weird..."

"–YOU'RE the one who's WEIRD!" Bulma shouted.

"Oh, well! Who cares?" Son Goku said, pulling his GI back on.

"I take it back... 'weird' doesn't even come close..." Bulma mumbled. Bulma left Son Goku to himself and went to take a bath. "Is he for real? He acts like I'm a witch or something. When he's totally something that jumped out of a horro m..." Just then Son Goku took a peek at Bulma, causing her to plunge into the tub. She emerged yelling, "WHADDA YOU THINK YOU"RE LOOKIN' AT!"

"...so instead of a tail, you've got an extra butt?"

"It's not a butt, you idiot! They're boobs! An' when you're a little older you're gonna think mine are incredible!" She shouted. "Yeesh...! How old are you anyway, kid?" Bulma asked.

Son Goku pointed to himself, said, "How old am I? 14."

Upon hearing this Bulma let out a loud yell, "EEEYAA! EEEYAAA! VOYEUR! PERV–!" Throwing anything she get her hands on at Son Goku. "You're only two years younger than me!"

15 minutes later...

Bulma was blow drying her hair and said to Son Goku, "Next time you pull that, I'm callin' the cops!"

"I'm starvin'."

10 minutes later, Bulma had finished her hair, and had a small ponytail jutting from the side of her hair. She had placed bread and coffee in front of Son Goku.

"This is food?" Son Goku said, eyeing the bread and coffee. "This 'bread' stuff is all soft and nasty!" Son Goku had half of the bread stick down his throat. "And the soup's bitter..." He said taking a sip of the coffee."

"It's coffee, moron! Maybe if you 'd ever learned how to eat you wouldn't be such a shrimp!"

Just then Son Goku jumped up, grabbed his shoes and nyoi-bo saying, "I'm gonna go get you some real food!"

"HUH? What? You're goin' out?"

"I'll... Be right back!" He proclaimed, tying his nyoi-bo holder onto himself.

In the distance a wolf howled to the moon.

10 minutes later...

"I'm Ho-o-o-o-ome!" Son Goku announced.

"That was quick..." Bulma said, getting up from her book.

She opened the door to see Son Goku standing with a dead wolf hanging behind him on his nyoi-bo.

"I caught a wolf! An' a centipede for flavor!" Son Goku said with smile.

Bulma screamed at the top of her lungs and slammed the door.

Son Goku, now roasting the wolf over a fire, called to Bulma, "Are you sure you don't want any? I could cook yours medium!"

"Shut up! Don't even make me think about it!"

Son Goku finished eating the wolf in about ten minutes after it being cooked. When finished he went back in saying, "Whoo! Well, off to dreamland!" After pulling his shoes and nyoi-bo off Son Goku hopped up on the futon, exclaimed, "Whee-heee! This 'futon' thing is gonna be fun!" Bouncing up and down. "And I haven't slept with somebody f'r way too long!"

"'Slept... with'...? You have got to be joking! Here's your blanket... and here's the floor." Bulma said.

Son Goku abruptly stopped bouncing and said, "We're sleepin' apart?"

"W'll duh!" Bulma said, lying Son Goku's blanket out for him. "An' if you try anything you're dead!"

"But I always used grampa as a pillow... it was so soft and comfy.." Son Goku reminisced.

"You aren't using me for a pillow, freak!" Bulma shouted at Son Goku.

Son Goku now on the floor. "So it was just you and your grandfather right? What happened to your parents."

"I dunno." I guess they abandoned me in the mountains when I was a baby." Son Goku said, with a smile spreading across his face. "Then grampa found me and decided to keep me! Heh! heh! heh!"

"How can you laugh about that...? They prob'ly abandoned you 'cause you had a tail..." Bulma thought.

"Were you abandoned 'cause you have a butt on your chest?" Son Goku asked.

"I told you, I'ts not a butt!" Bulma yelled. "And who said I was abandoned! I just happen to be on summer vacation from school–and I'm taking advantage of it!" She paused and drank some water, spat it down the sink, continued, "I've only go another 30 days to find the rest of the dragon balls! I don't have all year like you!"

In the middle of explaining this Son Goku fell asleep.

"RRRG... if you're gonna ask questions, at least wait for the answers...!" Bulma mumbled.

The next morning, crack of dawn...

Son Goku awoke, stretched his body and started towards the door when he saw that Bulma was still asleep. He looked down and saw her 'pillow' and said, "Well, her pillow's not as big as grampa..." He hopped onto the futon. "But I can sure five it a try!" He lied down on Bulma' s pillow, he pulled his head back up and patted it twice, 'pat-pat.' He then pulled Bulma's panties off, and. . . .

"EEEEYAAAA!"

This woke Bulma up in a second, "What! What!" Looking around, "What happened!"

She saw Son Goku cowering in the corner saying, "Y-y-y-you've... L-l-lost your ba-ba-ba-ba–"

"WHAT!" She sprang from the bed saying, "I've lost my Dragon Balls!" She reached into her bag and found the balls right where she had left them, "What the... they're right here idiot! Geez you freaked me out! Stop having nightmares, will you!"

A little shorter than last time, but not ever chapter can be the same length. R&R please.