This was supposed to be a brief interlude to provide a slightly different perspective on the story. Instead it ended up being longer than some of my earlier chapters because Plagg is my favorite character in this show and I got carried away.

Whoops.

Plagg was not enjoying his evening.

Oh, the day had started off well enough. No day that began with camembert first thing in the morning could be completely bad, after all. And after that morning's Akuma fight Adrien had given him another scrumptious piece of camembert to enjoy. It more than made up for him having to use his powers to help Adrien transform to fight that ridiculous scarecrow. He had then had the most satisfying nap during Adrien's photoshoot, in which he had a delectable dream involving a wheel of brie and a wedge of roquefort arguing over which one of them would be eaten first, all while a mold-ripened neufchatel fanned him as he lay on a bed of camembert.

Waking up from the dream was of course less pleasant, but the stomach growls it left him with had inspired him to think over which delicious wedge of cheese he would enjoy for dinner. He had been thinking about it ever since arriving back at the Agreste mansion. Sitting in Adrien's pocket during dinner had been dull. Would it kill the chef to prepare a cheese plate to complement the salad every now and then? Though the thought of a gooey reward waiting for him back in the room was enough to help him power through. Plagg thought he might burst when Natalie held Adrien up outside the door to review tomorrow's schedule, but finally, finally, they were going inside and Plagg could enjoy that wedge of camembert that had been haunting his taste buds since he had awoken from his nap.

Only for her to show up…

The last time Ladybug had interrupted his evening he at least had caught sight of her swinging outside and had time to duck into a cupboard with his cheese. And he only had to stomach their unsettling lovey-dovey behavior for ten minutes. This time though he had been stuck in Adrien's inner shirt pocket while Adrien had leaned in to kiss Pigtails. For the first time in his long existence, Plagg was glad that his stomach had been empty. He was sure camembert didn't taste nearly as pleasant coming up as it did going down. And as if that wasn't bad enough, he then was stuck even longer while they talked. He desperately tried to catch a whiff of the pleasing cheese aroma from his cupboard stash, but all he could smell were the nasty, sugary pastries the two teens were eating. How Tikki stomachs that rot I'll never know, he thought bitterly to himself.

He figured it couldn't get any worse, but of course it did. He was the Kwami of bad luck, after all. To his horror, Ladybug had leaned Adrien back, her intentions obvious. Seizing the opportunity, Plagg phased through the back of Adrien's shirt and then through the sofa, underneath which he remained, desperately trying to block out the sound of two teenagers sucking face right above him. He considered making a mad dash across the room for his cheese cupboard, after all they were probably distracted enough. The thought of Tikki's lecture and shouts if he revealed Adrien's identity though was enough to keep him in place.

I'll let Ladybug be the only one who gets a lecture from Tikki tonight, Plagg thought grumpily. Though I would love to see Pigtail's face if she realized Cat Noir was the boy she's currently playing tonsil hockey with…

They finally stopped swapping spit long enough to make plans for another date, much to Plagg's horror. Sure, next time he would be prepared with a hiding spot, plenty of camembert, and a pair of sturdy ear plugs, but this couldn't be a good idea. While he frankly didn't care if they knew each other's identities, he knew both of them would do their best to keep it a secret. And that meant one of them would eventually call things off for the good of Paris, leaving the other emotionally vulnerable. And if not that, one of them could find out the other's identity in a bad way, leaving them feeling betrayed and lied to and once again emotionally vulnerable… Emotionally vulnerable was bad enough for superheroes when someone like Hawkmoth wasn't in power, but at times like these it couldn't be allowed to happen. Knowing how head over heels Adrien was for his spotted lady left Plagg assuming he wouldn't be able to talk him out of it.

When Ladybug finally left after their final nauseating kiss, Plagg instantly shot straight for his cupboard. Immediate lectures were Tikki's thing. If he was going to lecture Adrien it would be on a full stomach. Not to mention that the boy would probably be staring out the window for a while, unable to listen to anything around him.

After finishing not one, but two wedges of Camembert, Plagg floated lazily over to Adrien. His holder was no longer staring out the window, but was now laying on his bed staring up at the ceiling.

"Plagg, this was… without a doubt… the best night of my life."

"Aw, and here I thought it was still when you met me," Plagg replied snarkily. "I'm truly hurt by your insensitivity."

That comment, though a sarcastic tease, did seem to knock some sense into Adrien.

"I'm sorry that you got stuck in the middle of that. I got caught up in the surprise of Ladybug showing up that I didn't think about you," Adrien said. Plagg was pleased to see he looked at least a little ashamed.

"Don't worry about it, I managed to survive even if it was barely," Plagg drawled in response, "and honestly I'm extremely grateful you don't think about me when you've got your tongue down Ladybug's throat."

The Kwami couldn't help laughing at the grimace that appeared on Adrien's face at that comment. After a moment though an uncomfortable silence settled between the two. Adrien was avoiding making eye contact with Plagg.

"Kid," Plagg began softly, "you know what I have to say next, right?"

Adrien sighed heavily. "Yeah. That dating Ladybug, even in secret, is dangerous."

"Good, lectures always are easier when you know what they're about."

"But, Plagg," Adrien responded hastily, "what are the odds that Ladybug would be interested in my alter ego? How could I turn down that opportunity? This is the best stroke of luck that the bearer of bad luck could hope to have. Why, for all I know I could be the guy that Ladybug has been turning me down for all-"

"I'm going to stop you right there before you get carried away with that line of thinking," Plagg interrupted. His serious tone caught Adrien's attention since it wasn't very often he spoke seriously about anything. "It's dangerous, and you know it."

Adrien hung his head ashamed, causing Plagg to feel a little bad. He flew over to his holder and placed a comforting paw on his shoulder.

"If it makes you feel better, I'm not going to stop you from having your little date nights."

"Really?" Adrien's head shot up in surprise.

"Really," Plagg said with a grin, "though I am going to help you make sure they're done carefully. Tikki will kill me if I let you do something stupid to screw up and reveal your identity. And you are going to owe me so much camembert for this."

The hug that Adrien gave him reminded Plagg that there were other good things in life besides cheese, even if they didn't taste as delicious. He really is a good kid, Plagg thought. And who knows? Maybe with my brilliant help they'll actually be able to make this crazy scheme work!