Chapter 6: The Tooth Fairy

"Shouldn't we be going to the Koopa Kingdom?" Mr. Cape asked Ham while they were still at Dairy Queen.

"Yeah but ice cream is just so good!" Ham said with a cone in his mouth. He dropped the cone and it fell to the ground. "Oops." He said as he picked it back up and put it in his mouth again.

"I know ice cream is delicious but we have a job to do!" Mr. Cape said.

"Don't you dare say we have to leave!" Mrs. Left yelled.

"You have to leave! All of you!" The manager of Dairy Queen ordered.

"Why? We didn't do anything!" Kapp said cheerfully as always.

"You have been causing commotion so leave now or I will have you arrested!" The manager ordered once more.

They all grumbled as they walked out the door and went to the car. "Stupid Dairy Queen." Mr. Right said angrily.

"Don't you dare call Dairy Queen stupid! It is just the manager!" Mrs. Left sneered.

They kept driving and driving and driving until they all fell asleep while Ham was still driving. When they woke up they were all tied to the same chair.

"Where are we?" Ham asked.

"We are in a room where we are tied to a chair." Mr. Right answered.

Just then a lady with wings, shiny teeth, and a wand walked in. "You are looking for Mario's teeth?" She asked.

"Yeah." Ham said. "Are you the Tooth Fairy?"

"No." She answered. "I'm the Tooth Fairy's sister."

"I'm the Tooth Fairy." A voice called out.

The heroes looked over and saw a fat, tall, hairy dude with a wand and wings.

Cape and Mr. Right screamed like a girl.

"Just kidding. She really is the Tooth Fairy. I'm the Tooth Wizard." He answered.

"That's great." Cape sighed with relief.

"So what do you want?" Mrs. Left asked.

"We want to help you." The Tooth Wizard answered. "But first let's introduce ourselves. I am the Tooth Wizard, as you all know, and you can call me Hairy Gary or just Gary."

"I am the Tooth Fairy and my real name is Really Lily. Just call me Lily." The Tooth Fairy introduced herself.

"I'm Ham and this is Mr. Cape, Mr. Right, Mrs. Left, and Kapp."

"Nice to meet you two." Kapp greeted.

"Now if you don't mind, GET US OUT OF THIS CHAIR!" Mrs. Left screamed.

"Okay." Lily let them out of the chair.

"So what do we do now?" Ham asked.

"Gary will gather the Tooth Kingdom Army and we will attack the Koopa Kingdom! And make their teeth shine! Then they go kaboom!" Lily screamed.

"Awesome!" Kapp yelled and he jumped up and down.

"All you have to do is make them go boom!" She screamed again.

"Not awesome!" Kapp said as cheerfully as always while he was still jumping up and down.

"But how do we get Mario's teeth from that?" Mr. Cape asked a smart question. But he got a dumb answer.

"You buy fake cat teeth!"

"That has got to be the stupidest thing I have ever heard!" Cape screamed.

"I like chocolate milk!" Gary said just like Cheese from Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends.

"No never mind. That was."

"Okay Tooth Fairy lady, we need to get Mario's REAL teeth now! You are the Tooth Fairy, you can locate teeth. Can't you?" Mrs. Left ordered.

"Only with the Super Tooth Wand." She answered.

"It's in your hand." Mr. Right pointed to the wand in Lily's hand.

"No, no. This is just the Tooth Wand. I need the SUPER Tooth Wand."

"Okay where is that?" Ham asked.

"It is with Plapple C. Treeburger. He's the Super Duper Raging Apple Tree." The Tooth Fairy answered.

"Aw man. We beat him in a dance contest once. This sucks! We gotta find that stupid apple tree again." Cape complained. "Do you know where he is?"

"Oh yeah I do. He is in the Super Duper Apple Orange Villagetown. That's somewhere in the Super Duper Ultra Apple Banana Kingdomville." The Tooth Fairy answered.

"And we can get you there! Just take the Toothmobile! It can go at the speed of toothpaste!" Gary added.

"Speed of… toothpaste?" Ham asked.

"Yeah! The speed of toothpaste makes mach 5 look like cavities!" Lily screamed cheerfully.

"Okay then. So where is this vehicle?" Cape asked Gary and Lily.

So the Great Tooth Wizard opened his mouth but no words came out. He had his giant mouth open like he was to say the letter o.

"Yes what do you need to say?" Mr. Right asked.

Lily shook her head. "He isn't trying to say anything."

"Then why does he have his mouth wide open like an idiot?" Ham asked.

"You asked where the Toothmobile was and he opened his mouth. Get it?" Lily said like a know it all.

"Wait? So what you are saying is his mouth is the Toothmobile?" Mrs. Left asked fearfully.

"Don't be ridiculous! His mouth just leads to the Toothmobile. His stomach is the Toothmobile."

"This is going to be disgusting!" Kapp said cheerfully as he jumped up and down.

"So in you go." Lily said as she moved out of the way.

"I don't wanna." Cape said as he shook his head angrily like a little kid who was pitching a fit because he couldn't get a toy he wanted.

"I SAID GO IN!" Lily screamed as she grabbed all of the equipment and threw them inside the mouth of the Tooth Wizard, Hairy Gary.

"Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!" Kapp yelled as they rode down the Esophagus Tunnel.

They kept sliding further and further down until they landed in some sort of acid.

"Where are we now?" Ham asked as they all got up.

"I'd say we are in the stomach and are currently being digested." Mr. Cape said. "And to all the readers out there, we aren't going to die. Or are we? I sure hope not."

"We can't die because we are just figments of our own imaginations!" Mrs. Left said as she kicked Cape.

"How is that possible?" Mr. Right asked.

"I don't know ask the writer." Kapp said cheerfully as they were being digested.

"Hey Mr. Writer, or Mrs. Writer I don't know which one. But I have a question. How can we be figments of our own imaginations?" Mr. Right asked just like Kapp told him to.

Well, it's a long story and I have no freaking clue.

"Stop breaking the fourth wall everybody! We have enough of that. So back to the story." Ham ordered.

Right. So where was I? Oh yeah our heroes were being digested in Hairy Gary's stomach. Will they survive? I don't know because I write as the stuff comes to me. So yeah. After a few minutes everyone was digested completely except for Ham. Now he is digested completely. When he opened his eyes again he was in a sleek white hover car. They knew it was the Toothmobile.

"How do we know it's the Toothmobile?" Mr. Right said as he broke the fourth wall even more.

Because it is just common sense.

"We don't have common sense." Mr. Right stated. "Except for Kapp, he's just weird."

"Hey! That's rude! I do not have common sense! I'm not weird like that!" Kapp said cheerfully but angrily.

"How can you say something cheerfully and angrily?" Ham asked curiously.

You guys just shut up. I'm repairing the fourth wall. And the NEW reason why you guys know that it is the Toothmobile is that the word Toothmobile is written on the side.

"That's better." Mrs. Left said with a smirk.

Now no more breaking the fourth wall. And go!

So our heroes drove the Toothmobile far and wide until they saw a horizontal line in the ground. A sign was on the line. It read Welcome to Super Duper Ultra Apple Banana Kingdomville. Are you ready to die? Well if you are, proceed on. If you aren't, then still proceed.

"Let's go!" Kapp screamed cheerfully.

End of chapter.

"Aw man why does this chapter have to end?" Kapp said cheerfully but sadly.

"How can something be cheerful and sad?" Mr. Right asked confusedly.

SILENCE! No more breaking the fourth wall and this chapter is over.