Chapter 12

Chase looked at the photos on Britain's fireplace. She had been to the condo on several occasions and always loved to see the new pictures Britain added; today was no different. She let her eyes wander over pictures of Britain and pictures of her dad and pictures of Britain with her dad. She couldn't help but admire how happy they looked.

She noticed the 10x13 black and white photo in the back. She picked it up and stared.

Britain and Dave were both naked. He stood behind her, his with one arm wrapped around her he covered her breast while and his other arm was draped across her body, his hand covering her most intimate part. Her arms covered his and their fingers were intertwined. What struck her most about the photo was the look in on their faces. His head was bent toward her neck, his eyes loving sweeping her naked body while her head was slightly turned to look at him, like she was feeling him take in her beauty.

The intensity and desire in their eyes caught Chase's gaze immediately. It was as if someone had been able to capture what it felt like when she thought about Jeff. Even though she didn't know him that well, she found herself aching to touch him, wanting to kiss him, wondering what it would be like to make love to him.

"You like that one?" Britain asked walking into the living room. Chase quickly put the picture back on the fireplace. Britain smiled and adjusted the picture back to where it was. "It is a great picture. My friend Christina took it. It's your dad's favorite, too."

"Why do you and my dad have sex so much?" Chase asked, kicking herself. She had hoped it would come out better than that.

Britain whipped around, almost knocking down everything on the fireplace.

"I mean you guys kept doing it in LA. Do you always have sex that much?" Chase asked, digging the hole deeper and deeper.

Britain smiled. "Well, you know..." Her voice was soft and distant.

Chase knew that she was thinking about it. Chase looked at Britain and shook her head.

It hit Britain like a stack of bricks. Of course she doesn't know. I'm surprised Dave didn't buy her a chastity belt for her birthday.

Britain never thought in a million years she would be having the sex talk with Chase. That was a job for her mom. But Emily was a bitch and probably wouldn't be honest with her. The same way her Ma wasn't honest about it either. She had fed her this crap about it being beautiful and the closest possible way you can be with another person. She didn't tell her the real deal, like how sometimes, you can't sleep at night because your body aches to be touched, or that sometimes, you like to be hurt because it gets you off, or how giving your first blow job can feel like you're choking to death, or about all the fun stuff you could try; like snowballing...

She walked over to the couch and sat next to Chase. "Well...because it's the closest you can be with another person." Did she just say that? That was the same crap her mom told her. If she was going to have this talk, she was going to be honest by God. "It's like this; I love your dad, and I love being with him. It just feels good...it's kind of like me being able to show him physically what I feel for him in my heart."

Chase's look was bordering on disgust at the thought of her dad having sex and utter confusion. "What's it like?" She asked biting her finger nail. She couldn't come right out and tell Britain that she was feeling that way about Jeff.

"What's what like? Sex or sex with your dad?" Britain cautiously asked, praying she didn't mean the latter.

Chase shrugged, "Just sex in general."

Britain got the hint, Chase was thinking about someone in particular. She couldn't help but to smile. "Why do you want to know all of a sudden? It wouldn't have anything to do with one Jeff Hardy, would it?"

Chase's eyes grew big. She could tell by Britain's smile that her secret was safe. She couldn't stop smiling.

"I'm not telling you what to do; I would never do that. But please take your time. Once it's gone, you can never get it back." Britain turned to face her "Jeff's had a whole lot more experience than you, but don't let him talk you in to doing something that you're not ready for. There's nothing worse than a really bad experience your first time."

Chase felt sad. "I don't even think he's thought about me like that."

"Why not?" Britain asked.

"Look at me. I look like an eternal child. I'm not one of those wild stripper types that John goes for and I'm an exotic sex symbol like you...I'm plain. I'm the old fashion, wholesome all American girl. I'm sure has all types of sexy women dying to be with him. Why would he want me?" The thought of it made her want to cry. She wanted to be desirable, to have him look at her the way her dad looked at Britain in that photo.

"You're a beautiful woman and believe me he sees that. I talked to him about you. You should have seen the way his eyes lit up. He'd be crazy not to want you." Britain said moving Chase's hair behind her ear.

Chase looked at Britain and sighed. "What was your first time like?"

Britain broke out in hysterical laughter. "It sucked! It was the worst fucking thing ever! I swear I didn't do it again for 8 months, it was so bad." She noticed the look of horror on Chase's face. She wasn't doing a very good job at making her feel at ease. "Well, nobody told me what to expect. I understood the emotional parts of it, but they left out all the physical stuff."

"How old were you?" Chase asked.

"Sixteen. I wish I would have waited. When we moved to San Diego, I was fourteen. There was this boy who lived down the street, Nuñez, we started going out and one day it happened. Man was it awful." Chase smiled eagerly awaiting the rest of the story. "Well to start, he was a virgin too; and neither one of us knew what the hell we were doing. We had the making out part down, but he didn't do anything to 'get me ready'. He just stabbed into me. Oh my God, it hurt so fucking bad, and he wasn't angled right or something, because the more he moved the more uncomfortable it got. Then I was bleeding...I thought he broke something. And then in like three minutes, it was over." Britain finished through her laughter.

"You bled?" The sight of blood made Chase feel nauseous. Oh, Britain was surely changing her mind on the whole idea.

"Not everyone does. I did, but I'm sure that's because he didn't know what in the hell he was doing...but we kept going out and tried it again, and each time it got better and better. "

Chase nodded in understanding. "What changed?"

"I don't know. I think I as I got older, I started to know what I liked. Don't let anybody tell you that experimenting can't be fun. It's better when you're with someone that's not just interested in getting off. When you're with someone that wants to give you pleasure their more open to it." Britain looked over at Chase, "Plus masturbation helps..."

Chase wanted to crawl away. I don't believe she just said that!

"I'm serious. How else would you know what feels good to you, unless you've felt it? Sometimes you know what you want, but not how you want it. Some of my best sexual experiences have been when I'm home by myself with a glass of wine and a bath..."

"Ok! I get the picture." Chase said quickly.

"Sorry... Anyway, you'll know when you're ready; not when Jeff's ready or when your dad is ready, but do it when you are ready." Britain hugged Chase and left her alone to think.

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Jeff dialed Chase's phone a little after one in the morning.

"Hey, you sleep?" He asked after hearing Chase's voice.

"Not really." She adjusted in the bed.

"I was thinkin' about you." He said softly. He could hear her smiling through the phone.

"Nothing bad I hope." She said.

"Nope. Matt's been givin' me shit about seein' you this weekend. He says I'm gonna corrupt you." He laughed. The thought that he could corrupt someone was somewhat amusing. Jeff was usually the one who did things on a dare, not the other way around.

"Maybe I want to be corrupted." She smiled.

"Chase, you flirtin' with me?" He couldn't stop smiling.

"Have you been drawing lately?" She asked sitting up in the bed.

"Yeah." He laid back on his bed and closed his eyes. "You know what a muse is?" He smiled when she said no.

"Well, some people believe that muses were the daughters of Zeus. They were put on earth to inspire man. They all do different things. Some muses help people write music, some help paint, some deal with love. But there are some people that think that muses are angels that come down and help people out. I think you're my muse."

She was shocked. She had never been told she was an inspiration for anyone before.

"Before I met you, I was bored and depressed. I couldn't draw anymore...but now, I feel like I want to do things. And it's weird because I know we're just friends and all, but I just want to be around you all the time." He said pouring his heart out.

"Are you drunk or something?" She asked laughing.

"It's not often you're gonna hear me talk like this, so you better appreciate it. These two weeks, have been the most fun I've had in a long time." He listened to her silence. He was sure he had gone too far. He really liked his girl and here he was scaring her off.

"Me too." She said finally.

Jeff laughed.

"What's so funny?" She asked.

"I haven't felt this nervous around a girl since high school." He admitted. Talking to her was easy. Right now he didn't care if he sounded stupid he had to let her know how he felt.

"Why do I make you nervous?" She asked with a giggle in her voice. She had to admit that she liked the fact that she had this effect on him.

"I don't know..." He thought of how he should say it, "I like you. I know that I haven't known you that long, but I like you. And I kinda hope that one day we can be more than just friends. I keep thinkin' about everythin' I say to you before I say it, because I don't want to screw this up."

"And what is this?" she asked. He was saying everything she was thinking.

"I have no idea. I know what I'd like it to be." He said letting his voice trail off. He hoped she didn't hear that last part.

"Jeff," Chase closed her eyes and let out a sigh, "I've never met anybody like you before..."

"Is that a good thing or a bad thing?" He laughed.

"Let me finish..." She laughed back. "I don't know how to do this. I don't know how to date. I don't know how to be like those girls that you meet after the show. I can't be like that; I don't want to be like that. I want you to like me, but I'm not willing to change who I am for that to happen."

"Why do you think I'd want you to change? I like that you're not like them. I like that you're real. I think it's cute that you're so inexperienced; it makes it different. Don't you think if I wanted to be with those other girls, I would be? I'm not interested in them, I'm interested in you." He couldn't believe that this girl made him feel like this. He had only known her for all of two weeks and she already occupied every part of his mind.

"So what do we do now? How am I supposed to be around you?" She asked sincerely. She didn't know what to do after an admission like that. But she relaxed when she heard him laugh.

"You act the same. That's what I like about you. Don't change."

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Dave couldn't stop laughing. He had been listening to Britain talk to him about her first sexual experience for about an hour.

"What made you think about that?" He asked adjusting the phone to his ear. She knew she couldn't tell him that Chase asked about it. So she lied. She told him that it was just on her mind.

"So what about your first time?" She asked sinking back into her pillows.

"It was great. I was great. I think it lasted for about 30 seconds. But it was definitely the best 30 seconds of her life." He laughed.

"And after all this time, you've only learned to last a minute? I guess I should be grateful that you built up your stamina." She mocked.

"What does that mean? I'm not a minute man...two maybe, but not a minute." He joked.

Dave was an amazing lover and they both knew it. Not only was he gentle and generous, he could last for hours. When they first got together, she use to search his bag looking for Viagra, she swore that was the only way that he could last that long. But to her surprise and utter happiness, it was just him. He was that damn good. And on the few occasions that he finished before her, he would still make sure that she was satisfied.

"What I wouldn't give for two minutes right now." She said sighing.

"For you," He breathed heavily into the phone. "I'll make it five."