Perseus' shield
Synopsis: Admiral Janeway has found the Protostar; she teams up with Zero and HoloJaneway to find Chakotay and the missing crew, but she soon realizes she'll have to do a lot more to get Chakotay back. J/C romance, angst, hurt/comfort, Prodigy/Voyager crossover #whereischakotay
Tags: Romance, Hurt/Comfort, Angst, Friendship, Zero, Medusan, Star Trek Voyager, Star Trek Prodigy
Author's notes: Well, here we go, my first foray into Voyager/Prodigy crossovers! I'm a little shocked that FFN doesn't have a category for Prodigy yet! Hopefully that'll get fixed soon.
This is set sometime in the future when the Dauntless and Protostar crews have (presumably) reached an understanding and Adm. Janeway can start looking for Chakotay and the missing crew. So I'll leave the Dauntless/Protostar chase and face-off (as seen in the awesome teaser released in early September!) and that whole storyline in the hands of the show's talented writers! I can't wait! I also don't really try to explain what the Protostar had been doing buried on that asteroid... Once again, I'll leave that to the show writers!
In my desire to post this before S2 of Prodigy starts, I wrote this rather quickly compared to my usual process, so I didn't spend as long editing and polishing as I normally would. So I apologize for any mistakes, typos or loopholes!
This story has 3 chapters and is (for the most part) complete, so I'll post every few days!
Also, this is all pure speculation at this point and probably not that original, but I hope you enjoy! Now on with the story!
oooOooo
Chapter 1
It was strange to be in here.
The Protostar ready room looked like it had not been used in a very long time. Clearly, Kathryn thought wryly, the ship's new...crew and captain... had yet to see any use in having an office. It was hardly surprising, given how young they all were – children, really. Kathryn shook her head to herself even as she raised her cup of coffee to her lips and walked to the large window lining the starboard side.
That meant that until today Chakotay may very well have been the last person to sit in that chair, or even make use of the replicator from which she'd gotten her coffee. Something tightened in her chest at the thought, prompting her to sweep her gaze around the room wistfully, looking for signs of his presence. Any signs. But there were none. From what she'd seen, even his quarters were devoid of any personal belongings. What had happened to him? To the rest of the crew?
In Kathryn's heart and mind (and in Starfleet Command's mission priorities), this was a pressing issue. So now that the Dauntless and Protostar crews had resolved their... misunderstanding, Kathryn had made it her mission to do everything she could to find the missing crew. To do so she had commandeered (for the time being at least) both ships to expedite the process and enhance their chances. Young Dal had complained when Kathryn had first announced this decision, but his crew (including the Janeway Holo-program) had managed to convince him that helping with the search was the right thing to do. Starfleet officers didn't leave people behind.
Since then, and while the ships performed countless kinds of scans, Kathryn had spent hours going over the Protostar logs to see if she could find any hints as to where the crew might have disappeared to. That was assuming that they had not been killed. The last log entry, showing Drednok breaching the bridge doors, was chilling.
A chime at the door prevented Kathryn from dwelling on that harrowing thought. "Come in." She did a double-take at her visitor and frowned curiously. "Zero! Is there anything I can do for you?"
The Medusan floated closer, seeming to hesitate for a moment before speaking. "Yes, Admiral. Or rather the reverse. There has been something weighing on my mind for some time now. Something I have not disclosed to anyone until now. But under the circumstances... It is high time I speak up. In fact I must apologize for not doing so sooner."
Kathryn frowned as she walked to the desk and half-sat on the edge. A part of her brain imagined Chakotay doing something similar – she could almost see it, like a ghost image from the corner of her eye. "What is it?"
Zero came a little closer. "I... I believe I have met the previous Protostar captain before."
Hope flared inside her, but she quickly reined it back in. There was a reason why Zero had not mentioned this before, after all. She nodded encouragingly, if warily. "Go on."
"You see, when I was a prisoner on Tars Lamora, Gwyn's father – the Diviner – and his acolyte Drednok...They occasionally used me as a weapon – to hurt others into submission or to obtain information..." Kathryn's blood went cold as a terrible sense of foreboding descended upon her. She covered her mouth with her fingers, dread coiling her stomach. "As a Starfleet admiral I assume you know what happens when a biological being looks directly at one of my kind."
Yes. She did know. Kathryn had to swallow hard as she stared at Zero, struggling to register the words, her dread now a tangible, gnawing thing inside her. Oh no. No. This could not be happening. "Zero," she managed to croak. "Don't tell me you-"
"They used me against the captain of the Protostar," Zero finished quickly and Kathryn exhaled sharply, closing her eyes. "To obtain the authorization for the command codes."
It took Kathryn a full five seconds to recover a modicum of composure. Because Zero was telling her – actually telling her – that Chakotay had been tortured into madness for access to the ship's systems. She put her coffee aside on the desk because bile had risen in her mouth. All she could say was, "I see." After another long beat she cleared her throat, forcing herself to ask the follow-up question, though the possibility of the answer terrified her. "When you last saw him, was he still alive?"
"Yes. And as far as I can recall no other member of his crew were... subjected to the same treatment."
Kathryn nodded, trying her damnedest to see this as a silver lining. "Do you know what happened to them?"
"Not specifically. However I do know that once Drednok had the authorization codes, all members of the crew were transported or jettisoned off the Protostar onto a planet, and left there to fend for themselves. I do not know which planet, but I do recall a general area. I have already provided your crew with a series of potential sectors – it should reduce the scope of the search grid significantly. I realize this does not absolve me of my role in this, but..."
Kathryn could only nod in acknowledgement, her mind and heart still too busy haggling with her fear and processing the implications of what she'd learned. The people who had taken the Protostar had used a Medusan on Chakotay. She couldn't even begin to process the cruelty of such an act.
"That is all I came to say, Admiral," Zero replied demurely, then turned to leave. "Thank you for hearing me."
"Zero," Kathryn called. "Why didn't you speak up before? Or say something to the Janeway holo-program?"
Zero considered it for a moment. "I am not proud of my past, Admiral. I was hoping to forget it all. And for a time, I did. I only remembered when the crew accessed the classified logs for the first time, and by then I was afraid that if I told the truth, the others would be afraid of me. Or stop trusting me."
Kathryn nodded slowly. Though a small part of her did resent Zero for not speaking up sooner, she couldn't blame the Medusan for the rest, or for what happened to Chakotay and his crew.
"I see," she replied at last. "Well, thank you for telling me the truth now. To me that does make a difference, Zero. And thank you for helping us narrow down the search grid. I'm sure that will make a difference too."
Zero gave something similar to a bow, then-
"Bridge to Admiral Janeway." Kathryn startled as her combadge came to life. "Better come to the bridge. We've found them."
oooOooo
It took Kathryn every ounce of willpower she had to keep herself from running. She probably would have had she known where she was going.
And though her senses idly took in the reunions happening around her as she and her escort cut across the makeshift settlement Chakotay's crew had managed to put together, she took none of it in. Her entire being was just focused on one thing: Chakotay.
"Admiral, I know you served with the captain in the past," the man who had been Chakotay's first officer – Lieutenant Ming – told her as he led her through the settlement (though she was walking so fast she was actually one step ahead of him and he struggled to keep up.) "So I feel I should warn you, the captain... He's not-"
Kathryn cut the man short, raising a hand. "A Medusan was used against him. Yes, I already know all about that."
Ming's curious gaze lingered on her face in surprise as he led her into a building made out of timber and scraps of metal recycled from escape pods, then down a corridor. "We've kept him as comfortable as possible," Ming went on, "but there isn't much else Dr. Dilinska – our CMO – or anyone else could do for him under the circumstances. But we're all hoping this can change now that you're all here and we actually have access to 24th-century medical equipment. I mean we know it's a long shot, but..."
All Kathryn could do was nod her acknowledgement; she was too busy trying to rein in her own feelings – she was afraid, so very afraid of what she would find in that room. But then they were there, and it was time to find out.
Kathryn drew in a breath, then nodded tersely at the officer. "Let me see him."
Ming opened the door for her (though she idly noticed that it wasn't locked), his expression growing sympathetic now, then stood aside to let her in. With one last look at him, Kathryn stepped into the well-lit, comfortable (if spartanly furnished) room.
She drew up short, because the room smelled like him, the familiar scent bringing a thousand memories to her mind in the flash of a second, leaving her aching in the most bittersweet way. Her gaze swept around the room and immediately narrowed in on the room's sole occupant...
Her heart somersaulted then thundered in her chest; because after months of worry and grief there was Chakotay, alive, and just quietly sitting at a desk. Her heart near bursting, she had to consciously keep herself from rushing to him or calling out his name. Because as soon as she looked closer, she noticed the way he was scribbling frantically on a piece of paper with an old-fashioned pen, muttering to himself, and occasionally shaking his head. His appearance was disheveled, his movements sharp; clashing with what she remembered of Chakotay's typical poise and steadiness, his legendary grace under pressure. But now... Everything about the restless way he moved was just... wrong.
Her heart hit her toes as the reality of what had happened to him hit her full force – actually hit her. Though she had been warned, Kathryn could only stand still for a long second – too stunned to do anything else but stare at him in dismay.
Chakotay abruptly fisted the piece of paper he'd been writing on into a small ball before tossing it carelessly to the side. He immediately moved on to a new one, writing and sketching with renewed fervor, his forehead in his hand, occasionally nodding or shaking his head to himself, or rubbing his knuckles against his head. Kathryn idly followed the path of the crumbled piece of paper, and that's when she took notice of the walls: there were dozens of sheets of paper covering all the surfaces, all with what looked like flight trajectory diagrams, star charts, and technical drawings of (what looked like) ship propulsion systems that made more or less sense. Other papers simply looked like they had writing on it, words scratched in hurriedly. Others had abstract drawings. All of it looked like gibberish. The work of a mad man.
Remembering how afraid Chakotay had been that time when he'd believed himself to be affected by the genetic condition that had made his grandfather senile, the grip around her heart tightened painfully.
Swallowing hard, Kathryn shook herself and took a step closer, careful not to startle him. "Chakotay?"
He didn't look up from his work at the sound of her voice, but he shook his head, words tumbling out of his mouth. For the first time Kathryn caught some of it. "I have to find a way. But it's so far away... But I have to. Keep searching. I have to keep searching." He paused in frustration and grabbed fistfuls of his hair with both hands, then pressed the palms of his hands against his eyes, before resuming his mad scribbling.
Feeling hot tears prick her eyes now, Kathryn stepped closer still, making sure she stayed within his field of vision. When she reached his desk she crouched next to it, getting her first good look at his face. But aside from the disheveled appearance and frantic look in his eyes, he looked well cared for. Unchanged from the last time she'd set eyes on him, really. Somehow that only made it worse.
"Chakotay. Can you hear me? It's me. Kathryn."
He still didn't look at her, but this time she spied a smile curling his lips – just a brief tug upward. "Of course I can hear you, Captain. I've been working on Voyager's status report all day. Like you asked. Progress. I've made progress."
It was a relief that a part of him recognized her, but...
Kathryn felt the weighty gaze of Chakotay's first officer on the back of her neck, so she glanced at him over her shoulder. Ming was leaning against the doorframe, arms crossed over his chest. "It's good that he recognizes you, Admiral," he said, managing to sound impressed and sad at the same time. "It's rare that we get him to interact with us at all."
Swallowing hard, Kathryn returned her gaze to Chakotay, this time using the slightly sterner tone she used as a captain to address him. "Well, let me see it then. I think it's overdue," she added with a gentle smile, extending her hand. Because if he could react to that small bit of wry humor, then it would be a sign that wasn't entirely lost to her.
But instead he frowned anxiously. "Right. Status report. Ship's status report. I've been working on it all day. I have to get it done. Find a way home. Keep searching." He still didn't look at her as he sprang to his feet and started rummaging through his notes and papers, his movements sharp and abrupt, then chose a few – seemingly random – pages from the chaotic pile on his desk. He turned toward her but didn't meet her eyes or even looked at her as he shoved the selected sheets into her arms while he moved past her to wander over the walls. Once there he looked at the various schemes and drawings frantically, anxiously moving from one wall to the next. He tore a few additional pieces of paper from the walls, nodding and muttering to himself, then pressed those into Kathryn's arms as well on his way back to his desk. Kathryn resisted the urge to touch him, to grab his hand on the way and force him to face her. But she didn't know how he would react to that kind of contact. Not in his current state of mind.
Besides, she'd seen enough. She didn't think her heart could take much more of this for the moment.
She was still on the verge of tears as she watched Chakotay return to his scribbling and rambling. "Thank you, I'll take a look now," she told him softly, still cradling his pieces of paper against her ribcage. She spun on her heels, but couldn't quite meet Ming's eyes when she passed him on the way out.
oooOooo
"There's got to be a way to help him," Kathryn prompted as she paced the bridge of the Protostar, looking at the various people she had assembled there: the Dauntless' senior staff and CMO; Dr. Dilinska and the medical personnel who had taken care of Chakotay while on the planet; the Janeway holo-program. Of the young "cadets" only Zero was present: as the one who had caused Chakotay's condition in the first place, Kathryn figured she might need the Medusan's insight going forward.
"None that have been discovered," the Dauntless CMO replied.
"But that doesn't mean there isn't one," the Janeway holo-program cut in defiantly, sagely, and Kathryn almost smirked. Because the same thought had just crossed her mind. This was very strange.
"Well, now that we have access to real medical equipment, we can at least start looking for treatments," Dr. Dilinska said. "Unfortunately we really have little data to start from. All I could do these last few months is make qualitative observations. So we'll need to start there: we need to assess the extent of the neurological damage."
"Gwyn's recovery from a similar condition may also be a good place to start looking for a cure," the Janeway holo-program suggested. "After a thorough search of the database, we were able to replicate the synaptic stimulation therapy that Voyager's holographic Doctor once devised to help Commander Tuvok recover from neuronal shock. It seems to have greatly sped up Gwyn's recovery."
Kathryn nodded as her mind flashed with memories of that particular incident. Though the Doctor's therapy had been miraculous in Tuvok's case, she knew from having met Gwyn that it wouldn't be as potent a cure this time.
From the corner of her eyes, Kathryn saw Zero float to the pile of papers Chakotay had given her earlier, slowly going through them. Kathryn had actually looked at them too, hoping to find in them some hints that Chakotay was still in there, trying to speak to her somehow. But most of them had been abstract drawings and looked like gibberish to her.
Meanwhile Dr. Dilinska perked up at what the Janeway holo-program had said, exchanging looks with the rest of the medical staff. "That's great! We can definitely start there, and observe how Chakotay reacts to this treatment. Though given Gwyn's slow rate of recovery, we might need to combine this with another form of treatment in the captain's case."
Kathryn gave a terse nod. "Good. Get your team started on that." She turned to the Dauntless' senior staff. "Meanwhile, make sure the rest of the original Protostar crew is made comfortable while we figure out how to proceed from here."
Understanding that they were dismissed, the Starfleet officers rose to their feet and filed out of the bridge.
"Admiral," Zero called before Kathryn could follow the officers, the tone inquisitive. "Did you say Captain Chakotay gave you these sketches earlier?"
Kathryn frowned curiously as she approached Zero. The Janeway holo-program did too, and Kathryn once again shook her head at the strangeness of this...situation. "Yes. Why? Do they mean anything to you?"
"I am unsure. Some remind me of the Protostar propulsion system. But this one," Zero said, taking one piece of paper to show to them, "could be a representation of what he saw when I was used against him. It reminds me of the way some of the...victims described the way my kind has appeared to them. Or the feeling they experienced in their minds."
Kathryn's frowned deepened. To her the drawing Zero was showing her looked like angry scribbling, with dark lines violently erupting from a center like the rays on a sun, or an explosion from a star-like epicenter. Had Chakotay felt like his head had exploded? Her stomach coiled painfully.
"If that is the case," Zero went on to indicate another drawing, forcing her to swallow her bubbling rage and focus, "then this one...could be interpreted as a message from him... A request, as it were."
That particular drawing showed one of those dark bursts of energy blending into something that looked like a much more peaceful representation of the same thing, with lines in white connecting the two, like strikes of lightning, or maybe like long, thin fingers. Kathryn found herself exchanging a skeptical look with her alter ego. "Alright," she said slowly, "I'll bite: what do you think he's asking for?"
"Help."
The Janeway holo-program tapped her nails on her holographic cup of coffee as she spoke, her gaze on the sketches. "If Zero is correct, and we interpret the first sketch as a representation of Chakotay's mind, then in that light the second drawing almost looks like his mind is merging with a healthy one, with fingers reaching out..."
Kathryn's head snapped up to stare at Zero, wide-eyed. "A mind meld! You think Chakotay wants us to perform a mind meld on him? Could that help him?"
Was this even possible? And had Chakotay really been asking for a mind meld through his drawings? If so, then it meant that maybe he was still in there somewhere! That somehow, he knew what was happening to him. Only he couldn't express that in words anymore, so he'd found another way to communicate. Hope flared once more, and this time Kathryn allowed it to burn. Just a little.
The Janeway holo-program started pacing in a strangely familiar way, brows furrowed in deep thought. "There have been some instances where a mind meld actually helped repair neurological damage. Perhaps in Chakotay's case this procedure can help heal the fractured parts of the mind that cannot be fixed using only the Doctor's synaptic stimulation therapy – memories, in particular. It is definitely worth considering."
Kathryn nodded, heart and mind racing. But who would perform this mind meld? There were no Vulcans on either the Protostar or the Dauntless crew. Unless...
Kathryn whirled on Zero again, leaning forward on the console to watch the Medusan eagerly. "Zero, you know better than anyone how your telepathic abilities work. Could you do it?"
Zero managed to look perplexed. "To my knowledge, such a thing has never been attempted with one of my kind before. However..." Zero started floating around in front of them, as though in pacing, one finger touching the casing in a way akin to someone tapping their chin. "I believe it would be possible for me to initiate a telepathic connection between Chakotay and another sentient corporeal being. This individual could act like a guide to him. It would be... teamwork," Zero added with a look at the Janeway holo-program, to which the hologram responded with a proud nod.
Kathryn nodded eagerly, caught between hope that this might actually work and the knowledge of just how hypothetical – crazy, even – this all was. She straightened – for the first time feeling lighter, the hope in her chest almost painful now. "Alright then. Let's go pitch this to the experts."
"If we are to go through with this, I will require a volunteer for the mind bridge," Zero cut in before Kathryn could leave. "Someone Captain Chakotay trusts, someone he-"
Kathryn raised a hand to interrupt, because that wasn't even up for debate. "I'll do it. I know him better than anyone else out here, and I've been part of Vulcan mind melds before, so I have an idea of what to expect. It should be me. Besides, Chakotay seems to be caught in a world of his own, and from what I've gathered, part of it is still on Voyager, at least some of the time, so I'll be familiar with his delusions. I can help him through it."
"Very well. Assuming that we proceed with this plan, I still feel as though I should warn you that this will be very risky, Admiral," Zero warned, "for both of you. Won't your subordinates try to prevent you from attempting this, considering your position of leadership?"
Kathryn smirked to herself even as she started making her way toward the door. "Oh I'd like to see them try."
ooOoo