Chapter 28: Milked for Blood (part 2)
I feed the both of us, eating uncertainty and tension. We start with the main course and get more adventurous as my eyes travel the table. My inner thoughts of rejection make me stuff my face at a melodic pace. The potatoes are for the panic and the arugula salad is just for decoration.
How many lies will I have to burn my tongue on and painfully swallow before this is over? What will Edward want in return when I ask him to help Jake?
"Wait, why did you order the whipped cream?"
"For the garlic bread." I pick up a large slice and wave it in front of his nose.
"Oh no, absolutely not." His face bunches up.
"Yes, I've been dreaming about this." I swipe at the whipped cream with the crisp slice of garlic toast and take a bite. I almost moan from the sweet depth of flavor.
Edward stares in mock horror when my eyes roll in pleasure. "Ew, absolutely disgusting. This is the type of shit you dream about?"
"It's delicious. Don't knock it. I was right, this is the perfect combination."
He abruptly pulls my arm towards him and takes a bite of the odd pair. "Blasphemy. That's a sin. Sugar on garlic bruschetta is a disgusting travesty."
"Are you serious! You just got blood on my wrist and you're calling me disgusting. I might actually throw up."
He leans down until his lips reach my inner wrist and kiss the blood smear, lapping it away with his feverish, erotic tongue. "Hm. I think it would've tasted better if it was your blood."
I'm stunned into stone.
His tongue sets fire to my core in a way that makes me throb and pulse involuntarily. The heat coaxes the metallic arousal. The garlic and tomato residue in my mouth runs bitter. The aftertaste settles in the pit of my stomach.
"Now that's disgusting." I think I'm gonna be sick.
His voice turns soft and gentle. The eye contact he maintains is invasive. "You can't find me too repulsive, you saw me on the side of the road, in peril, and stopped. You could've kept going, but you didn't." Goading me for pleasures and weakness to be exploited, he leans his face toward mine.
"That doesn't count for anything." I shake my head, his nose millimeters from mine. "You were about to drop on the side of the road. You were gonna die out there." My words reach him in faint whispers.
"Was I? I probably would've passed out but…" He's evil. He preyed on my sympathy and gullible nature. He milked my weakness with blood.
"You bastard." I chose kindness and morality against my better judgment. I was trying to help you. I was trying to ensure that you keep your word.
"What? I never said I was dying. You just assumed. I mean eventually, yes I probably could have died. I'm not sure how far I would've gotten before somebody found me."
"Wow." I look up at the ceiling and beg for forgiveness. I saved slime and let the devil escape."Why did I stop for you?"
"Because you're drawn to me. You connect to me. Your subconscious understands me." His sticky fingertips graze back and forth over the sensitive veins in my wrists.
"You're being very dramatic today." I love my husband. I believe you are incapable of understanding what that is.
"You pretend that you don't feel the connection between us. It's like you're trying to block me from more than your flesh. I wanna know more. Is it your heart or your thoughts that hold the darkness? Your heart is just like mine, a clotted, mucky mess. I have no doubt. But does the wrong thing occupy your thoughts in the worst moments?"
"Is that what you think I think about? To keep you confused in the dark? Do you think I'm consumed with bad thoughts?"
"I think you're consumed by what you fear the most. Are you afraid of the pleasures made of blood? I'd like to have sex with you while we are drenched in blood. How it would feel so good to be inside you, fucking you, coming so deep as the red slips over our skin. We can keep going until you're full and I'm absolutely empty. Think about the possibility that there's nothing wrong with bathing in the darkness for ecstasy."
There's nothing to consider. I belong to Jake. We have been made clean. I'm afraid of disappointing him. I'm afraid of betraying him and what we have. "You do not fit into my fantasies or my fears."
"What is it going to take to make you mine? How can I make you see me clearly?" His sticky fingertips trace the highest point of my cheekbone. "Can I satisfy your deepest and darkest fantasies, the ones you tried to bury and destroy? Can I make you forget his name? Those are the types of things I often think about." His eyes play with my lips. He draws closer until our foreheads are touching.
I stuff half of a wedge of potato in his mouth, effectively breaking away from his fever. "Shut up. Stop talking. Eat."
He ignores my demands, speaking around the food, "I heard you quit the diner."
"So what?"
"Where did you go? What's changed?"
Everything. "Nothing." Jake and I are married and we're having a baby. A baby whose life has been decided for him because I made the mistake of being in your presence.
"You could be so much happier with me. You wouldn't have to give up anything. You wouldn't have to lie so much. I'll show you. There's no reason to hide from what you want. It would be so easy." He buries his face in my hair. "Spend the rest of the night with me."
I climb over sexual context and inappropriate questions. "What makes you think I'm giving something up?" I refuse to answer your sickness.
"I can't read you completely, I never could. But when you looked away just now, it seemed like you lost something."
"I haven't lost anything."
"Liar."
"It's the truth. What makes you think I'm lying to you?"
Edward withdraws from the growing intensity when his father cuts through the ugly silence. I'm let up for air at the sight of first aid.
Carlisle finally appears from the kitchen with his doctor bag in hand. The waiter sets up a side table for his sterile tools. "Hello Bella, it's nice to see you again. I'm glad you're here. My son can't stop talking about you."
"Hi, Carlisle." My cheeks blush from the embarrassment.
Carlisle peels the sports coat away from Edward's shoulders and lifts his shirt. "Any further to the left and it would've ruptured your spleen."
Edward groans and moans in pain while Carlisle treats his wounds. The older man stops all of the bleeding, ignoring his painful cries. His merciless hands work quickly to finish Edward off with some sort of IV drip and pills.
"This should hold you until we're home. Refrain from attending negotiations without Emmet and Alice. Now they have to go and finish the job. I don't even want to ask what they stabbed you with."
"I'm fine."
"These solo trips have to stop, Edward. Jasper was driving around looking everywhere for you. He said you must've run off like a bat outta hell." Carlisle's stern eyes turn soft when he speaks to me, "I got word that the ship was successfully rerouted. Thank you kindly, Bella. My family owes you many thanks and a favor."
All the blood in my body rushed to my feet. "You're welcome," the words are forced from my throat. It's done. I have to go through with it.
"I'll leave you two to dinner. Please come and visit us again, Bella." Carlisle leaves with metal trays full of bloody gauze and a face made of worry.
Edward nudges the catheter that's under his skin. "Bella, are you alright? You look like you're having trouble breathing."
"I'm fine it's just, it happened much sooner than I thought it would." Everything feels like a split-second decision. I don't like feeling rushed.
"Well yeah, we're only a few days out. It's now or never."
I bite down on my tongue and wait for reality to assault me.
"We're not talking about a ship anymore, are we?" Edward picks up a lock of my hair and puts the ends between his lips.
"Jake, well, Jake and I made a deal with someone to make that happen."
"What type of deal?" He lights up with interest.
"Nothing you need to worry about." I stuff both of our mouths with chocolate cake.
"Can I make a guess?" He pulls on my hair with his mouth until I face him again.
"You would never be able to guess." I square my shoulders and face him completely. I look him in the eye and ask, "Can I use that family favor now?"
He drops my hair. "What did you have in mind?"
"A deal. I need you to make something go away."
"Something or someone?"
"I need you to make those bodies in Denali disappear."
All of his playful movement pauses. "Is this for you or for Jacob?"
"For me." I concede, "And for Jake."
"You're in the business of making deals, huh? You're the most beautiful broker I've ever met." His fingers go back to tightly twirling around my hair. "What's in it for me?"
"What about a ledger?" Sam has it and he must be thwarting all your business plans.
"Old news… Whatever's in it is compromised. It's of no use to me." He takes a sip of water from his glass before digging for the last of me that's buried. "Do you have anything else?"
"What happened to me being your hero? That's not enough to grant me this favor?"
"Nope, I was dying. That doesn't count for anything, right? Anybody would've stopped to save my life. That's what you said."
Edward is no one's hero. His teasing drains me of all my optimism. It's as if he could anticipate this moment and predict my every move.
"Then what will make this a deal?" What is it that you want from me?
"I'll settle for what's fair." I think he's starting to enjoy the strain he's putting on my heart.
"I'll show you 'fair'. Where's the ledger, Edward?" A petite woman with blond hair and large eyes entered the restaurant with a brutish giant. They're both wearing all black, casting a shadow over the table as they draw nearer.
"Hello, Jane, Demetri." Edward sits up with his arm wrapped tightly around me for weight support. "I managed to intercept the route. What's the problem now?"
"Do you know where it is?" The man looks down at Edward with the blackest eyes I've ever seen. He's completely dwarfed our table with his towering height.
"The ledger? Why do you even need it at this point?" Edward plays his offhand card with an oblivious tone, "I assumed you had it. You took a trip to Denali. As far as I'm concerned, I'm not sure it even existed."
"You know Aro wouldn't have sent us if it were fake. You know we didn't find anything either." Jane angrily gnashes her teeth, accusing, "You knew there was nothing to see in Denali."
Edward throws his hand toward Jane's hulking shadow. "How could I make that assumption? Demetri's the tracker."
"And you're the reader," She snaps back.
"Exactly, which is why I didn't stop you. Anybody here on behalf of the Volturi wouldn't listen to me." Edward's complacent vibe has worn a hole in Jane's civility.
"Right, so you or one of your incompetent siblings better find it." Her yelling makes me squirm in Edward's arms.
My movement catches her attention. She stares at me for a minute too long. She neatly smooths her hair back in place.
"How about I'll get it to you after I receive a blood transfusion," Edward suggests. "Now's not a good time. I'm having trouble seeing straight in front of me. I'm a lil' anemic at the moment."
Demetri starts mouthing off in Italian. He's viciously barking at Edward. His rage comes closer to the table and echoes throughout the dining room when Edward continues to ignore his threats.
Jane breaks into his rant when she suddenly asks me, "Who are you?"
Edward makes eye contact with her, answering, "Mine." He tightens his hold on my shoulder.
"What's your name?" She asks again. Her head tilts at my silence. Her persistence sends a chill through me.
Somehow she cut my tongue. I wouldn't dare speak my name. It's something about her that's unbalanced. She sends signals of sick torture.
"You live around here?" Her words were meant to inflict fear and offer a promise of pain. She smiles at me. She looks me over with glazed eyes.
Edward slams his hand flat on the table. "Get out of my town, now! When the ledger turns up, I'll be sure to send it first class, overnight, carrier pigeon, fucking pony express, balloon mail. Just get the fuck out of my sight."
She threatens Edward again, reminding him to "Get it done, or you'll be hearing from Aro." The two creatures float around the dining tables and cut through the middle of the room as they leave.
I cling to Edward for the first time and cross-examine him for his impression of the last fifteen minutes. "You sure you don't want that ledger? Sounds like you need it."
He explodes in laughter, hugging me tighter, "I guess you caught me."
"What if I told you I know who has the ledger?" I whisper to him.
He brings his forehead to mine again, mocking my whisper, "I would say that you should tell me. Is that part of your deal?"
I nod into his skin. "It's Sam. I heard he has it."
"I can't say I'm shocked. Can you get it for me?"
"It's not that simple. I would have to ask Jake and he has to ask someone close to Sam. If I can get it to you, will you forget about what Sam did in Denali?"
Edward leans back at my request. "Why? He should be punished."
"He already is. Jake is taking his place as the next Alpha. Part of the arrangement is for the treaty to remain intact. Can your family forgive the tribe? Can you make this go away?" I beg for mercy.
He shakes his head. "I can't do that." Looking at my lips, he takes my wobbly chin in between his fingers.
"Why?" My voice breaks with my spirit. I watch his mouth turn up and his brows furrow in feigned concern.
"You know why I like you so much, Bella?" His thumb skims my bottom lip.
I shake my head back and forth silently.
"Because I despise what isn't you. I hate myself, really. The difference between us is what makes you a hero. You're willing to save those that aren't worth saving. But I'm not a nice person. You want me to help his tribe, but I'm not convinced. Why should I want to help him?"
"Because I need you to."
"Why would I do that when I can watch the Quileutes fall apart. I don't have to lift a finger. The Wolves can fight amongst themselves and the bloodlines will implode at my feet."
"No," I cry out.
"No?" His eyes grow round and make a parody of my pain.
"No!" I growl into the small space between us.
"Well then, I need an incentive."
"How much can I give? I saved your life. I stopped the ship. There's nothing left."
"That doesn't count, remember? I was dying. The ship was something else entirely. If you can't offer me anything in return, this is not a deal. It's a request. And requests are unreliable." His voice feels like nails on a chalkboard.
This pain is unbearable. "What more do you want?"
"Guess."
"This isn't a game. You owe me." I clench my teeth and my fists trying to hold back tears.
"Exactly, I owe you, not Jacob or his brother."
"What do you want?" I grovel, my eyes prick and turn watery.
"Kiss me." He tilts my chin, my lips a breath away from his.
I cringe inside of my skin. Taunting logic is telling me to say no, get up, and leave. I've done everything in my power. I've given my all. I tried to fix this.
He takes my silence as a sign of hesitancy and consideration.
"Can't you grant a man's dying wish? A kiss for Jacob's clean slate. A kiss for bodies to disappear. A kiss for a safe tribe. All your trouble will be gone." He looks into my eyes waiting, searching.
My throat swells as I lean over and close the distance for a brief kiss but its chaste nature frustrates him. It was too soft and reserved to satisfy him. His bloodstained hands catch me and hold my face in place.
"That won't do. That's one for the road. No, kiss me as if I were him... as if you were trying to save his life."
I dip my toes into the blackness and close my eyes. I brace myself for the betrayal.
He claims my mouth again. Starting slow and gentle, it feels like an eternity. He pulls me into him and I mold into his embrace. His strong tongue demands entrance. He groans, weaving his hands into my hair and it's like a hook has been lodged into my chest. A vice grip that tries to steal everything good and sends my heart racing.
I can feel the dirt under my fingernails as I cling to him. He's wormed his way into my subconscious. The poison invades my senses. I stop fighting his advances and wait for it to be over. I move with him, wallowing in the filth. His breath invades my soul, playing with my patience and willpower.
He wants all of me.
You can't have me.
He bites my lip when I try to pull away. "More," he moans into my mouth.
I close my eyes even tighter and grip his hair. I kiss him with enough force to feed his cravings. My tongue dances with his, tasting blood and chocolate. I'm being crushed by the minute.
I push at his chest to stop him again. I can't breathe. I need air. I need to be cleansed.
"Yes, that's it." He licks the spit line from my lips. "Say my name."
"Edward," I expel his name.
He smiles softly at the sound of his name. "I've been revived."
I have been damned. I have been dragged back down to the very bottom.
"Stay with me tonight. I'll fill you with everything I have."
Alright… don't hate me! I'm hungry for your thoughts.