The Real Issue
Disclaimer: We don't own Naruto... but if we did, Zabuza be the President of the Russian USSR... O.O
A/N: Blah... We both have major writers block, so sorry if it's not really that good, and any mentions of Zabuza being the head of the Russian USSR, is purely coincidental.
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Chapter 2
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Sian was sitting up in Shikamaru's bed now, examining his room and glancing curiously at the boy in front of her. Her first impression was that his head looked like a pineapple monstrosity.
"So... where exactly is Konoha?" she asked once again.
"It's in the Land of Fire, and this is the village of the Hidden Leaf. I think I should take you to the Hokage. Maybe she can explain who you are and what you were doing in my bed."
"The what-age? I already told you, I'm Sian, and I don't know what I'm doing in your bed, if I knew that, I wouldn't be here! Although it is quite comfy," she mused.
"Yes. I know it is comfy... which is why I would like it back now. Come on... can you move quickly? Can you move?" he asked, not quite sure of her abilities.
"Er... if you mean can I run fast... No."
"Great. I'll have to carry you then. How troublesome."
He sighed and picked her up and hopped out the window.
"What the hell are you doing! Put me down, you psycho, I'm sure I can walk just fine," she said, squirming once they hit the floor.
"No. I'll just carry you otherwise we'll be at it all day," he retorted, ignoring her protests and holding on to her tighter. He hopped into the trees and started heading for the Hokage's Office.
"What are you! A monkey? You sure don't look like one, although I'm sure I can change that rather easily," she mumbled angrily, crossing her arms and looking thoroughly irritated.
Upon arrival in the Hokage both Sian and Shikamaru got a shock as they saw all the other's standing there and everyone looking befuddled. "You can put me down now, Mr.Tarzan."
"Shika... you found one too? What's its name?" asked Sakura.
"IT! I'm not an it... I'm a Sian... at least I don't pink hair," replied Sian, glaring hard at the girl.
"How rude," muttered Sakura, and proceeded to ignore the girl.
"SIAN!" came four screeching voices rather loudly echoing in the tiny office.
"Oooooowwwww! So loud," moaned Sian, covering her ears and wincing exaggeratedly.
"Where's Jess and Chris?" asked Hoi, looking around Shikamaru expectantly.
"I don't know... I woke up in his bed," Sian said pointing at Shikamaru.
"Oh... what were you dong in there Sian?" whistled Josh and Jamie, catcalling and hooting like lunatics.
"Perverts."
"Well... at least you didn't wake up in a bath tub to find a pink haired girl hovering over you. And she says its natural. F R E A K!" murmured Josh under his breath to Sian.
"Ha. Great, at least I had a softer landing than a bathtub." Sian said.
"Oh yeah, a much softer landing" he said, snickering along with Jamie at that.
"Will you just shut up?" Sian snapped, smacking the side of Josh's head and glaring at everyone in the room, turning a very interesting shade of red. 'I'm so glad Jess isn't here,' was all she could think.
Speaking of Jess...
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"What the hell! Are you really going to hit a girl?" Jess whined, backing up slightly and getting into a random martial arts pose.
"This is just to test your strengths... I'm not going to really hurt you. Just a tiny bit."
"No!" she yelled throwing sticks and whatever else she could at him. "No no no no nooo!"
Kankuro expertly dodged all the missiles and took out three kunai. "Do you really underestimate me that much," he mocked throwing them with accurate precision.
Only with sheer dumb luck did she manage to dodge them all. "Kyah... are you trying to kill me?" she demanded, looking at the blades stuck in the tree.
"Well, I'll make the first move then," said Kankuro getting into the fight. Performing the hand signs for his puppeteer jutsu, two of his puppets appeared next to him. "Ha. What you going to do now?"
"OMGWTF! Two can play at that game," she retorted and pulled out a sharpie and ran away.
'Is this part of her jutsu? I wonder what she has planned,' he said glancing warily around him, waiting for her to attack.
Sitting in a tree she had scrambled into, Jess was looking at the top of Kankuro's head clutching the poor monkey who had unfortunately been in that tree minding it's own business. Picking a pine cone she threw it down at Kankuro's head and scrambled into the next tree over and hid behind the leaves.
Sensing an attack, Kankuro moved and blocked the missile with a kunai when he saw it was a pine cone. Hopping into the tree it came from he saw a monkey and thought, 'Wow, she used a living creature as a replacement. Maybe she has a bit of talent after all. Now where is she?'
Moving as quickly and quietly as she could, Jess aimed a kick at Kankuro hoping to kick him out the tree. He ducked and jumped out the tree and landed expertly on the floor and took up a defensive stance, his puppets in front of him.
"Tch... damn... I missed," groaned Jess. 'What the hell is he? A ninja?' Clambering down from the tree somewhat awkwardly, Jess pulled the three kunai from the tree and jumped back. She had a feeling there was more to these puppets than met the eyes. When the first puppet attacked she was prepared and dodged the attack, stabbing the thing in the back of it's neck. It fell to the ground, apparently a lifeless doll once again.
"Oh. I see you're better than you have been letting on. Well, we'll fight until first blood okay? And I'll start fighting properly now."
"Blood! What the hell are you on? Crack?" shrieked Jess, very much alarmed.
"Here I come," he said, and rushed at her, with his other puppet beside him.
At the last second Jess dived out the way and lashed out with her arm, felt the kunai slice something and a searing pain spread across her left cheek. Spinning around and opening her eyes she saw Kankuro holding his arm. When he took his arm away she saw blood on his hands.
Both their eyes widened in surprise. Jess put her hand up to her cheek and felt something warm and wet trickle down her face. Touching it gently, she lifted her hand and examined her fingertips. They were covered in blood. Apparently it was a draw. Exhaling heavily with relief, Jess smiled cheekily at Kankuro and said, "I guess it was a draw then."
She knew it was just pure luck she had even survived that but she wasn't going to let him know that. Cocking her head at him slightly she called out to him, "Well, let's go to the Hokage's office then. Maybe she knows what's going on."
Kankuro looked at the smiling girl in front of him. He had underestimated her and now she had tied with him in a fight. He hadn't thought she would be so good. Smirking slightly he replied, "Come on then," and swept her into his arms and started heading in the direction of Konoha.
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"Dorothy? Kansas? Who are they? Do you know them personally. What weird names," stated Ino, giving a hand to Chris, to pull him out of the roses.
"How the hell can you know Kansas? It's a state. Are you stupid, or just 'special'?" Chris asked, taking the hand, and being pulled up.
"Do you need medical help? I'm sure Sakura wouldn't mind helping," said Ino, whilst thinking to herself 'Then I can gloat to her about how I saw him first'.
"I don't need medical attention, you light bulb, I need to go home. This has to be some god awful dream," complained the boy, who was looking shorter than usual, standing next to Ino.
"Stop complaining. At least your roses weren't crushed from random guys falling out of the ceiling," Ino said, flipping the sign on to door, to 'Closed', and pushing the boy by his shoulders, out of the shop. "We're going to see Tsunade-Sama, I'm sure she'll have some answers to all this"
"I don't own roses... and who the hell is Tsunami?" Chris asked, as he was being pushed away from the flowery smelling shop.
"Tsunade, not Tsunami. She's the Hokage, now scoot."
"What's a Hokage?" questioned Chris, looking puzzled.
"A Hokage is the leader of the lands. When the strongest and smartest person in the village who is best suited to the job is chosen to run the village and all it's security and defenses," explained Ino, taking the lead and leading Chris down a road, at the end of which lay the Hokage's office.
"Whoa... hey... what? Stop psycho girl-" Chris started to protest but stopped when he saw Jess squirming in the arms of a weird looking guy and looking as agitated as he felt.
"Oi... cat boy! Put Jess down!" he yelled, running over to them.
"Chris!" said Jess, looking relieved that she wasn't the only one in this weird and funny world, where boys with cat ears tried to attack you and then leapt around like frickin' ninjas.
"Yea... where the hell is Konoha?"
"How the hell should I know. I pay about as much attention in Geography as you do Chris," she replied in an exasperated tone.
"Well I'm sorry but I landed on frickin' plant pots full of frickin' roses with frickin' blonde chicks standing over me... how do you think I felt?"
"I have no idea how you felt Chris... but I landed on a cliff. Fun."
The two ninjas just watched this transaction between the two, a sense of confusion growing rapidly between them until they felt they were looking and listening to an alien species.
"Ahem... sorry to interrupt but we really must get going now," said Kankuro. He still hadn't put her down. For some reason he felt he couldn't.
"Let's go Ino," he said, setting off through the trees again.
"Okay," she replied, grabbing hold of Chris and hopping into the trees after him.
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They both arrived outside Tsunade's office five minutes later with their passengers in tow, both of them protesting way too much.
"Ugh... car journeys are so much better than monkey travel," moaned Chris, clutching his head in his hand as if he was trying to physically remove it.
"Argh... quit ya bellyaching and shut ya trap," retorted Jess, though she was thinking the exact same thing. Kankuro still hadn't put her down and she was starting to miss the feel of solid ground.
They all entered the office when there were mixed cries from everyone starting when Chris and Jess cried out in unison, "Sian, Hoi, Rach, Josh, Jamie! You're all here!"
"Chris, Jess," the five replied smiling at one another.
"There's more," said Chouji, Neji, Sakura, Shikamaru and Temari, in disbelief and a confused, "Who the hell are all these people," from Kankuro and Ino.
Finally Tsunade held up a hand to silence them all. When that didn't work she roared, "SHUT THE HELL UP!" which made everyone quiet immediately.
"I don't know what is going on but it seems that an inter dimensional portal has opened up and allowed these seven to fall through. I don't think we'll ever be able to send them back. Quite literally, you have to spend the rest of your lives here," she said, a sad look crossing her face.
"What!" came several disbelieving cries from the boys and girls sitting in front of her.
"But we can't stay here. We actually have families at home, believe it or not," said Sian, ever retorting to her sarcasm.
"Yes, I understand that but there is simply no way. The fact that you even got here is a million to one chance. In fact, it is actually supposed to be impossible. Stuff like that only happen every once in a billion years. So unless you are immortal, you wont ever be able to go back."
Understandably, they all started questioning Tsunade.
"Yes, I know. I'm sorry but the are so many questions and no answers right now I'm afraid. Have any of you had any training as a ninja?" Tsunade asked.
"Um... no. We lead relatively normal lives before this happened," Hoi replied sullenly.
"Um... well, you are going to have to learn then. Otherwise your presence might be questioned. I shall tutor you myself. You'll have to get used to this knew life. Sorry."
There was a heavy silence hanging in the air. Until...
"I knew this was all your fault Rachael," Josh said.
"Oh get off it, Josh. She can't control the weather, can she?" said Jess, looking agitatedly at Josh.
"No. But ... I wanna blame her coz she is a boff."
"Will you shut up, Munze, no one gives a damn about what you think," said Sian, slapping him around the head again.
Jess sighed. 'Great... the rest of my life with Idiot, Retard, Boff, Psycho, Depressed, and Sarcastic.'
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A/N: Yay! Chapter 2 finally finished! I hope you all enjoy it... trust me... interesting stuff will be coming soon... hopefully next chappie... heheh ... As always R & R... Fallen and Sunny xoxox
