Crichton and the others were escorted to the headquarters and placed under heavy security.
There was one assassination attempt already, and the people and government of Lo'Mo appalled violence in any way.
They were placed in a strongly decorated cell. In other words, very ugly.
Raxil and the Hanji were taken to other cells, but Crichton and the others were together in one cell, where they did not speak to each other until Jool tried to break the silence.
But it only made matters worse.
"Why the frell do you keep blaming this on me?" John shouted at D'Argo.
"Because this is all your fault!" D'Argo hollered back.
"It is not!"
"Yes, it is! Pilot banished us, because he couldn't stand another wormhole-hunt!"
"He banished us because he was sick of hearing us argue!" John replied.
D'Argo stood up and began to walk around the room.
"I can understand that you can get quite egocentric when you're chased around the universe twice," D'Argo said. "...but I'm not putting up with this dren any longer!"
"What the frell are you talking about?" John shouted confused.
"That you always seem to think everything revolves around you!" D'Argo shouted. "And when something goes wrong, you blame it on somebody else!"
"I do not!"
"Yes, you do!" D'Argo said.
John rubbed his eyes.
He couldn't believe what he was hearing.
"Pip, tell him he's talking complete dren!" John said to Chiana, hoping to find an ally.
"No, he's not." Chiana said.
"What?" John replied dazed.
"Everything he says is true." Chiana said. "You treat us like dirt, thinking everything revolves around you!"
"I do not! I totally do not!" John replied.
"Yes, you do." Jool said calmly.
John turned around, feeling cornered and outnumbered and abandoned and kicked in the nuts.
"For the short while I've got to know you," Jool said. "...you've clearly demonstrated that you think you're the only one who has any sense of reason. You think the rest of us are all primitive and wild or something. The only thing that matters is to you, is yourself..."
"Your ego." Chiana added.
"Your wormholes." D'Argo said.
"And Aeryn." Chiana concluded.
"Always Aeryn." Jool said.
John was stunned.
"This is unbelievable." John said.
"Frelling unbelievable."
He didn't want to do it, perhaps a little bit, but they forced him to do it.
"I sacrificed my life to save your son!" John said to D'Argo.
"I ate deadly mushrooms so I could get you back to Moya!" John said to Chiana.
"And now you're saying that I am egocentric?"
"John..." D'Argo tried to say, but was interrupted.
"Frell you!" John shouted.
John walked around the room one last time before sitting down in the farthest end of the dark chamber.
"Tell Harvey I said hi." John softly said to Chiana as he sat down with his knees curled up against him and looking angry at the door.
As Jool fainted and fell down to the ground, (overcome by her pain and stress she had to endure as she was nearly killed by Fe'Tor in the milking-chair) none of them reached out to help her.
As the jailer opened the door he looked shocked at Jool's unconscious body which laid in front him.
"Is she dead?" he asked.
"No." D'Argo answered as he got up. "She'll be all right."
"I'm starving." Chiana said.
As the constable walked into the cell, John jumped up to greet him.
"Yo, constable." he said. "How's the investigation going?"
"It is done." constable Sta'Kor answered. "I have questioned all participants and checked all facts."
"So there are no problems?" John asked.
"Your story checks out just fine, mister Crichton." the constable answered.
"I doubt it that the judge will make an extreme decision today."
"That's good to hear." John said.
"You will see the judge within the hour. But before that time arrives, you can sit down and have a nice meal. I have no doubt that you are hungry."
"We are." John said. "Thank you for all your help. We really appreciate it."
"No problem." the constable said.
"Before I leave, I would like to introduce you to your lawyer."
"Our lawyer?" Chiana asked.
As the Ricardo Montalban-look-alike walked into the large, pink cell, Crichton couldn't stop himself from smiling.
So he decided to turn his head away from the Sebacean with dark eyes and grey hair, and try to wipe that hideous smug off his own face.
It wasn't long before John's face was straight again.
But because John did not say anything, D'Argo stepped in before the man would feel disrespected in any way.
"Thank you for helping us." D'Argo said.
As the lawyer looked at the unconscious Jool who laid spread out on the floor of the cell, he turned to D'Argo with an arrogant look in his eyes.
"Yes. I am sure you are more then happy that I will save you from the deaths you deserve." the man spoke.
"I beg your pardon?" D'Argo said.
"The deaths we deserve?" Chiana asked.
"You heard me correctly." The lawyer said.
The man's face was old and wrinkled, and he a aristocratic and intimidating charisma.
"You are obviously guilty of the murder of an inspiring and promising young man! And if I were to choose between neglecting my duties and defending a lot of murderous outsiders, then I'd rather stick a grebbol up my..."
"On second thought," D'Argo interrupted. "Perhaps we'll defend ourselves."
"You heard us, Whitey, beat it!" John said as he moved to escort him out of the cell.
"My name is Ka'an, you disrespectful, murderous, bunch of..."
But they were unable to hear the rest of his sentence as the cell-doors closed and a rather confused Sta'Kor stepped inside.
The constable looked at the laughing human.
"What's so funny?" the constable said to Crichton.
"He said his name was Ka'an." John said grinning.
The constable didn't get it.
Neither did D'Argo and Chiana.
"Ka'an?" John needlessly tried to explain. "Khan!"
"What the frell are you talking about?" D'Argo said.
"It's from Star Trek..." John said. "...never mind..."
"So I hear you want to represent yourselves in court." Sta'Kor said, ignoring the human's strange words
"That's not an easy task."
"You're kidding right?" Chiana interrupted. "I did it once, and it was a piece if cake!"
Chiana failed to mention the fact that Zhaan almost died in that trial, as she and Rygel almost could not prove her innocence.
Sta'Kor wasn't sure if Chiana's comment made him feel any better or worse.
Better because Chiana had experience with this sort of things, but also worse because this also meant that they have accused of this sort of thing before.
John looked at Sta'Kor, wondering why in hell this man was so eager to help them.
He began to think about the lawyer, Ka'an, and how much he differed from Sta'Kor.
Sta'Kor was much younger, Ka'an was very old.
Perhaps this was a battle of the generations.
Young versus old.
The old make the rules, whilst the young stay up all night and party.
And do everything to break those rules.
"Your dinner is ready." Sta'Kor said as he opened the door and stepped out of the way to let two alien cooks enter the cell, carrying four plates of food.
Foods they had never seen before.
"Are you sure she's all right?" Sta'Kor asked as he made one last look at Jool.
"She's fine." Chiana said.
"Don't worry about it." D'Argo said.
Jool suddenly lifted her head and looked around.
"Where am I?" she said as she slowly woke up.
"See?" John added.
The food was terrible.
It tasted like Fe'Tor had coughed up some of his intestines in his last dying breaths and the two alien cooks took it, deep-fried it and let a moose eat it and crap it out again, and then they served it up on those plates and made them eat it.
It was the most disgusting thing John ever tasted.
"God, that is horrible!" John shouted as he threw up his food back on his plate.
"Only Rygel would eat something like this!" D'Argo said as he did the same thing and threw the plate in the corner.
"And even he has to be extremely hungry before he would!"
"They call this food?" Jool said.
"I don't know." Chiana said. "I kind of like it."
"Here." John said as he handed his plate to her. "Have my share."
Chiana laughed, but then she stopped and leaned closer to John.
"John," she said. "You are going to take the neural clone out, right? Out of my mind, right?"
John said nothing.
"Because-because he's driving me mad, you know what I'm saying?"
John knew perfectly well what she was saying.
"He is getting on my nerves!" Chiana started whispering to John. "And he's a frelling pervert!"
John smiled.
"Is he going to places you don't want him to see?" John said. "Memories you don't want him to watch?"
"Frell you." Chiana said.
"This isn't really convincing me to take Harvey back, you know." John said.
"I don't frelling care!" Chiana said.
"Yeah, same here." John said as he turned away.
"Frell you!"
Court was in session.
The accused party, John Crichton, Ka D'Argo, the Nebari girl Chiana and an Interion girl named Jool, were escorted to the centre of the room by fierce guards wearing black uniforms.
"Why are we accused?" Jool asked. "Neither Chiana or me did anything!"
"Shut up!" John and D'Argo said.
Graffiti was sprayed all over the room. It was some kind of strange form of art, and decoration.
People gathered in the large courtroom.
D'Argo and John recognised Fe'Tor's sister entering the room and sitting down beside Fe'Tor's former right-hand man, whose name John could not remember.
"That's the guy who was with Fe'Tor the other day." John said to D'Argo.
"No." D'Argo said sarcastic. "Really?"
"Frell you."
The judge entered the courtroom, followed by the members of the jury.
"Court is now in session." The judge said. "Here stand before me, the accused party. They are accused of more then twelve criminal acts, including assault and murder. How do they claim?"
"Not guilty, your honour." John said.
"Why do you always have to speak on our behalf?" D'Argo said.
"I am a good speaker!" John replied.
"Sure you are." D'Argo said.
"Accused say, not guilty." the judge repeated.
The judge was a Sebacean who looked younger then he seemed, and he only wore a large purple and black robe because of tradition.
Under the robes he wore a tight, leather, green suit, which was unseen to all, except Chiana, who caught a glimpse of it as the judge entered the room.
She was still smiling.
"The trial may commence." the judge said. "Who do the councillors for the defence wish to call to the stands?"
"Damn." John said. "We have to do that kind of shit. Who do we call?"
D'Argo thought hard.
"Raxil..." they both said.
"We call the creature Raxil to the stand, your honour!"
Raxil was forced to the stand by constable Sta'Kor.
She looked very nervous.
After she swore to tell the truth, John approached her with cunning paces.
John tried to act cool and intimidating, but D'Argo followed John and pushed him aside.
"Tell them how you manipulated us into breaking into Fe'Tor's compound!" D'Argo shouted as he grabbed Raxil by the neck.
"Tell them!"
D'Argo was pulled away by several guards. Raxil was glad to be alive.
"That was very smooth!" John said to D'Argo.
"Well, at least I scared her!" D'Argo said smiling.
John was beginning to realise what D'Argo had in mind.
"Good cop, bad cop routine?" John asked.
"What?" D'Argo asked.
D'Argo clearly wasn't thinking what John was thinking, and really DID attack Raxil to make scared. And it was not part of any plan or strategy.
After John whispered something in D'Argo's ears, D'Argo began to understand what they were going to do, and John smiled to the audience before turning to Raxil.
"Tell me..." John began. "How well did you know Fe'Tor?"
Raxil hesitated.
"I didn't know him that well. No. I mean. Yeah, I knew him kind of."
"Kind of?" D'Argo asked. "Kind of?"
He began to approach her intimidating, and she immediately began to talk.
"All right! All right! I did know him! We used to deal in freslin together, but that was cycles ago!"
The people in the audience began to talk amongst each other.
Fe'Tor was a widely respected man. They had never expected him to deal in such a thing as freslin. There were rumours of course, but those were never believed.
John saw Fe'Tor's former right-hand-man glaring at him from the audience.
"Did you, at any time, deal with Fe'Tor himself on those occasions?" John asked.
D'Argo growled aggressively.
"At first I always dealt with him personally, but as time passed I usually began dealing more with his agents instead of himself." Raxil answered.
"So you reckon Fe'Tor got rich out of dealing freslin?" John asked.
"Objection!" the lawyer for the prosecution hollered.
"Where is this getting to, your honour?"
"I'm trying to show the motive for killing Fe'Tor!" John said. "If you'd just let me finish...!"
"Your honour!" the lawyer hollered again.
"What?" the judge said.
He was somewhat distracted by the flirtations of a certain grey Nebari girl.
"Overruled." the judge said a little bit carelessly.
"Answer the question." D'Argo said to Raxil.
"Well..." Raxil went on. "I don't think Fe'Tor got rich by dealing freslin. He had a rich father which gave him all of his money after he died in that mysterious mountain-climbing accident."
"So what do you think Fe'Tor wanted with the freslin?"
"Objection, your honour!" the lawyer shouted. "How can the witness be able to tell us what Fe'Tor wanted!"
"Sustained." the judge decided.
John shook his head.
Trying to get to Fe'Tor was a dangerous and difficult thing to do.
So he decided to try another way.
"Tell me, have you ever heard of us before?" John said to Raxil. "I mean...John Crichton...Ka D'Argo...etcetera etcetera..."
"Yes I have." Raxil answered.
"And how did you meet us?" John asked.
Raxil started thinking.
"Well, I was walking down the beach when I noticed you two sitting in a tent. You started waving and invited me in and I entered the tent and I..."
"LIAR!" D'Argo said.
"Tell us the truth!"
"It is the truth!" Raxil lied.
"No it isn't!" John said. "Because that's not what the two girls told us you hired to spike our drinks and steal our money!"
"I did not hire any girls!" Raxil lied.
"Do you want me to bring them in as witnesses?" John said.
Raxil began to doubt.
"Do you?"
"No..."
"Then tell us the truth!" D'Argo shouted.
"All right!" Raxil shouted. "I hired those girls to get you out of the way, so that Fe'Tor could do whatever he wanted to do with your females!"
"You dirty little tralk!" Jool shouted.
"We are not their females!" Chiana shouted, before looking at the judge again, flirting.
"That's the truth!" John shouted.
He was bluffing of course.
He never had those girls as witnesses.
He never got their names, so it was impossible for constable Sta'Kor to find them.
"No further questions, your honour." John said. "Although I'd like to reserve our right to call upon this witness again."
"Of course." the judge said.
John and D'Argo sat down in their chairs.
The interrogation had made them both tired.
"Interrogation is an art." John said to D'Argo.
Watching all those episodes of 'Matlock' in the past really paid off today.
John only hoped that the prosecution wasn't going to smash their victory into bits.