Good evening, Doctor. Or should I say "good morning"? It's difficult to be certain at this hour isn't it?
What? Hellsing? What are you…how did you…
I killed my guards, stole their keys and escaped, obviously. I'll leave the exact details a mystery for the time being, although I've no doubt you'll figure it out eventually.
What are you doing here? What are you doing in my room?
Well, I was just on my way out and I realised that I couldn't possibly leave without saying goodbye. After all, we became so close before I had my accident. It would be a shame to let the friendship go entirely, don't you think?
Oh God…what are you going to do?
What's the matter, Doctor? Don't you want to be friends any more?
What are you going to do with that? Put it down. Put it down now. If you don't I'll call for the orderlies…
You can call and shout and scream all you like. On my way here I decided to liberate my fellow political prisoners. I'm afraid the staff has quite a situation on their hands.
Oh God. Oh God.
It's a sin to blaspheme. God hears your every word. Now hold still.
Ah!
I told you to hold still.
Fuck. Fucking Jesus Christ.
Language. I am a lady you know.
Ah!
Such a baby.
You're mad…you're crazy…
And I owe it all to you. Does it make you proud?
What…what are you doing now?
I've dreamed of this. I've wanted this. The destruction of my mind is one thing. You serve a higher master, and you are bound to obey. Orders are orders. I know that. But the abuse of your position…your abuse of me…you came so close. So very close. Is it simply sex? A quick, cheap fuck? Or is it a power trip? I'm not the only one, am I? I'm not the only one you tried to manipulate into becoming your blow-up sex doll.
Please…
No. I cannot be reasoned with. I cannot be forced. I cannot be manipulated or coerced. There is just enough left of my mind to understand what I've lost. And part of what I've lost is the place where mercy and forgiveness used to be. Empathy, understanding…the things that make me human…the things that differentiate between the monsters and I… I was half way to being a monster before I came here. That's what makes a good solider, a good warrior. You cannot wield a sword if the screams pierce your ears. And now what little softness I had is gone. I have anger and desire and violation. I am angry. I desire. I am violated.
I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I've never done anything like that before, I swear. But you were so beautiful…
Of course you haven't. Of course I am.
Forgive me.
I just told you, I cannot.
If you do this, you will truly be a monster, do you understand? You cannot go back. You…you will be a monster…just like Alucard. You will just become Alucard.
How can I become Alucard? Alucard is Alucard. I am me. I can become like him, but I cannot be him.
Please, be rational about this!
I told you to be quiet.
(Silence)
There, was that so bad? Well Doctor, I'd love to stay and chat some more, but it's a lovely night out and he's waiting for me.
(Silence)
Nothing to say?
(Silence)
A beautiful night.
(Silence)
For now and forever, it'll always be a beautiful night.
(Silence)
Goodbye, Doctor.
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Old, old, old. Discovered on a backup disc. First finished Hellsing fic. Revived briefly on my LJ under the creative title 'Defining Reality'. Assured that it wasn't really that bad. Decided to clean it up and post.
Didn't clean it up. Posted anyway.
Already had the "Integra is NOT a transvestite!" brawl with Thess.
Integra's 'white sounds' speech borrows heavily from The Real Inspector Hound by Tom Stoppard.