Hip hop music played as they made their way back to Detroit. Rio drove quietly as scenery snapped by, Beth's eyes trained out her window. Annie and Sylvie were chatting and laughing in the back, Beth failing to keep up as they jumped from topic to topic, Sylvie occasionally throwing comments to her brother that were met with a smile. Beth sneaked a peek at him. The easy and playful mood in the back was at complete odds with the somber tension up front. Not that her attention was fully on that. While she was chiming in on the conversation here and there, half listening, her mind was already on home.
The minute they'd roll back in the city. Would Rio keep his word and hire her and her sister on? And Ruby. She hadn't brought her up the night before, deciding it was better to treat it as a done deal, because it was. She wouldn't do this without Ruby.
She'd stuck her map in her bag out of habit, even though Rio hadn't asked her to drive and he certainly knew the way. At first she'd sat stiffly in her seat. Sylvie hadn't called shotgun, perhaps still a little sore at Rio. Listening to the uproarious laugh making its way from the back, it seemed their choice was pretty straightforward. It was nice to see Annie bonding with someone like that.
She tried not think too hard about the moment she'd see Dean again. Not about the guilt. She'd texted him this morning that they're coming home. She was looking forward to seeing him. She shouldn't feel guilty, she told herself. Not after what he'd done. It still didn't mean she felt good about it. It wasn't what she wanted to build a relationship with. But maybe she had to get something out of her system. Maybe that's what it was for Dean too. She didn't do this to make it easier to forgive him. She didn't just let it happen either. She made it happen. But she wasn't going to regret it.
If only it wasn't a little weird with Rio. He'd shot a few playful words to his sister, even to Annie. But while he'd spoken with Beth it wasn't more than he needed to. It wasn't like he was purposefully ignoring her but something was off. A few times she'd even tried talking to him but the short, clipped answers she got made it clear enough, though luckily nothing to the happy pair in the back.
About forty minutes in, she could sense Annie fussing in the back. "Hey, can we stop at the next rest stop? I could use a pee break."
"Yeah, we said we'd stop by and eat something on the way," Sylvie added.
Rio had hurried them that morning, reassuring his sister they'd get some food after they'd made some headway. No doubt wasn't pleased about it now. She herself preferred they'd drive straight through to Detroit rather than stop for anything other than a short bathroom break.
"Sure," Rio said. She could've bet he would've tried to postpone it. Maybe he thought it wasn't worth getting into an argument over.
"You want something?" Sylvie asked after the car came to a stop.
Rio shakes his head. "Nah."
"You're not hungry?" She asked.
He didn't answer.
"I'll get you something," She said, stepping out of the car.
"Coming, sis?" Annie asked, her hand on the door handle.
"I'll be there in a minute," Beth glanced behind her.
As the car doors closed Beth picked up her bag and started rifling through it. She didn't want this trip to finish this way. The tension with him opened this pit in her stomach that deepened as they sat quietly side by side.
Usually with Dean she'd wait it out. Ignored it. Eventually whatever the issue was or whatever was said was forgotten. In the few times they did have disagreements. It just didn't happen that often. But here she didn't have time. After all, she still needed to work with him right? She still needed to make this work.
Even if she'd never see him again except for business, still – for the umpteenth time she reminded herself: She still needed him. For now. But anything she wanted to say didn't feel right because she didn't understand why the tension was there. It had been a good time for both of them right? It had happened before and it wasn't weird afterwards. Not like this, anyway.
She kept racking her brain as she rummaged through discarded notes in her bag, trying to think what could be bothering him but came back empty. He was fine enough as they were getting ready that morning, but the distant way he was acting now made it seem like she'd done something to him. But what could it be?
"Where'd you go?"
The words pierced through her haze, and it was a a moment before his question registered. He was looking straight ahead, as if he hadn't said anything, but she was sure he'd spoken. The area around his eye was healing, still a shade darker. In a few days the skin color would be back to his regular tone.
"Where did you go?" She shot back.
"I had a call to make. Work."
She took her hand out of her bag. "At five in the morning?"
"Had to catch up. Distracted last night," his eyes took her form but it was a detached, marked with more distance than heat. She didn't let it distract her.
She took her other hand out of her bag and held onto it on each side. "I wanted to sleep in my room," she said, more curt than she meant it.
He nodded. The tension seemed to tighten between them, her answer not loosening its grip.
"I didn't see you," she added more softly. "When I left."
"I stepped outside."
It wasn't like she spent much time looking for him but she had glanced in the hallway and in the living room and noticed that the bathroom door was open. The air was chilly, her jammies not enough to keep her warm. The thought of his arms, his warmth, tempted her back but rationality won out. She'd wanted to get back to her room under her covers. Maybe pretend for a bit that it hadn't happened. But moreso, she realized, not wanting her sister to know what's going on. Even if her little sister seemed to know everything, Beth could remain in denial she had no clue. She'd never hear the end of it.
As neither of them spoke nor made a move to leave the car, her discomfort grew to irritation. What did he care? Was she supposed to think she'd hurt his feelings? She couldn't have possibly. The last few days couldn't have meant much to him, let alone that much to sulk over this. He had to have multiple girlfriends to go by the little that Sylvie had said. What did it matter when they'd only just met a few weeks ago?
Rio fidgeted in his place, his eyes meeting her for a moment before he looked away. It hit her.
He wanted to know if she regretted it.
She opened her mouth, trying to say something to refute it, when she chased her words back down. No, that couldn't be it. Even if she did regret the last few days, why would he care? She had Dean. He had… Others. But something was still bothering him, it was clear.
It didn't really matter what his problem was. All she went back to was the same target she'd kept from the moment she left him her necklace. Even if she'd hesitated to say it right away after he told her what Annie got into. Whatever she'd need to say to save what was happening here, she'd do it, even if it didn't make sense. They'd be working together, and it was already hard enough working with him in better days. Not just for herself, even if Dean's dad would be doing better soon, what about Annie and Ruby? If just for them she'd need to stay on better terms with him.
"If this weekend would've happened over, I would've still done it," she said, surprising herself. She wasn't sure that was what he wanted to hear, but it felt like the right thing to tell him. It wasn't what she'd meant to say. Even if – even if it was the truth. It may have made things messy for her, it may not have been a smart move but it was what she needed in the moment. And he gave it to her.
Her eyes didn't meet his as he turned to her. His eyes were searching for hers, she could feel it, but she wasn't ready to meet them. Finally, she looked up.
"Yeah?" He said, his eyes burning through her. He was milking it a little now but she forced herself to keep her eyes on him as she nodded.
"I don't mean, do it again," She was quick to clarify, her voice rising a bit. "I just mean I'm OK with what happened."
"That good?" He teased and it was a good thing too because otherwise she would've just thrown her makeup kit at him.
The tension dispersed, breaking like a mirror. Who knew why he needed to hear it, but it was a small price to pay.
His fingers entwined with hers as he took her hand. He leaned back against his car seat, his eyes on her face, as she stayed in her seat, feeling something she didn't want warm her chest, warning to bubble over. This wasn't hers. It wasn't his either. She was just thankful they could go back to what it was.
She pulled her hand back as she opened the back door, willing herself to return back to where they belonged. "You should at least stretch out your legs."
Rio gruffed back a noncommittal answer. Stretching her limbs wouldn't do any bad for her either she thought as she glanced at the list of restaurants outside the rectangle, gray building. Neither did having some food seem like a bad idea anymore. It'd be another hour until they were home and maybe she wasn't quite ready to be back in Detroit after all.
There weren't many options but she still circled the food court to weigh her options. Annie was going on about a chicken sandwich and Beth was pretty sure she was having a burger when Rio came up behind them quietly, reading the menu above their heads.
As the four sat down Rio took his seat beside Beth. The air still felt tense, and she fervently hoped neither Annie and Sylvia sensed it. Annie had ended up choosing tacos and thankfully seemed much too focused on them. Beth glanced at Rio's burrito. It looked good.
"What's with the buttoned up shirt?" Sylvia asked Rio. She exchanged looks with Annie and the pair laughed.
That morning Rio had walked in the kitchen with his shirt buttoned all the way up. At Sylvie's question Beth felt her cheeks warm, wondering if he'd chosen to wear the blue shirt that way because of what she'd left behind on his neck. The thought he'd had to cover it up thrilled her, which baffled her, and not for the first time she wondered if that's how he felt when he left a mark on her.
"This?" He motioned to his collar Sylvie nodded emphatically. "Styling. Maybe you should do something too. Stop wearing a shirt you've had since seventh grade."
Sylvie pulled at her shirt. "Some of us don't have to reinvent ourselves every week with some new look."
"How's the burger?" Rio asked Beth.
"It's good," Beth nodded, noticing how he was eyeing it. "Want some?"
"Yeah," he said and she passed it to him, trying not to draw her fingers away too quickly when he covered her hands with his as he took it.
"I told you to get a hamburger," Sylvie said, dunking her fries in ketchup. "He's always like this, he always wants what you're having."
Beth looked demurely at Rio's plate without saying anything.
Rio passed her his burrito. Beth took a bite, then took a bigger one.
She wouldn't have minded having a little more of her hamburger, she thought, when she finished it.
Annie and Sylvie chitchatted easily, commenting on passerbys and imagining out loud where they were traveling to, what made them end up here. Beth concentrated on her food. The relief she'd felt in the car was replaced by something heavier.
"You want anything?" Rio asked Beth once they were all done. He got up and reached for his tray when Beth waved over it. She had it.
"Ice cream!" Sylvie called out.
"Milkshake! Mint chocolate," Annie followed as Beth shook her head. Definitely no ice cream.
"No, thanks," she said.
"I'm gonna go with him," Sylvia stood up, Beth waving her away when she tried to grab her tray too.
Beth wiped her hands, taking another glance at Sylvie and Rio as she caught up to him.
"Did you have a good trip, Beth?" Annie asked.
Beth didn't like sing song tone in her voice.
"We did what we needed to do, right?" Beth said, finishing up her fries. "That's all that matters."
Annie nodded slowly, a smile growing on her face.
"Not now," Beth warned.
"Why not?" Annie put her elbows on the table, clasped her hands and cradled her chin. "It seems like the perfect time."
"We're tabling this conversation."
"For when?"
Never, Beth thought as she wiped her mouth and hands. "It doesn't matter. It's over."
"What's over?" Annie's eyebrows raised so high Beth thought they'd lift above her face like the cartoons her sister used to watch as a kid.
Beth moved the leftovers from Sylvie and Rio's trays to her tray. "The weekend," she said firmly. "It's been a long weekend and- and Dean and I are going to work things out. That's it."
"That can't be it, you just skipped all the good stuff," Annie argued, her voice pitching higher.
"It's over," Beth insisted and pointed to a tray. "Help me with that?"
If she was deluding herself about anything it was that Annie was going to let it go now that it was clear she had some idea that something went on. Knowing that, she still wouldn't have spent the entire night with Rio. But even though Annie was not pleased at her response now was definitely not the time to get into it. Not that she'd have anything to say. She came to help her sister and somehow they were able to work something out. There was no point to rehashing something she already shelved away.
When Sylvie and Rio rejoined Annie happily stepped beside Sylvie and grabbed her milkshake.
"This is for you," Rio passed her a small burger.
Beth opened her hand, confused. "I didn't ask for this."
"You wanted it though, right?"
Her stomach sank because she had, and how did he- "There's a bite missing,"
"Got hungry on the way," Rio said.
Beth's smile widened before she quickly glanced at her sister and Sylvie who were both too busy with their respective desserts.
"Thank you," She smiled shyly.
"Mhm." His hand brushed her back as he lifted his arm. Beth stepped aside in response, sensing he was going to try and put his arm on her waist. He smiled back and she looked down, seeing from her periphery him do the same.
Buddy kicked up a muddied storm behind him, the sun having not yet dried up the earth entirely, barking and chasing two other dogs. Sitting back on the bench, Beth watched him. Even though she and Dean played with him it wasn't enough so these afternoons were a real treat for him. Today she'd come alone. Sometimes Buddy would pace to another dog, step back, and try again. Sometimes he'd join her at the bench and sit next to her. She'd pat his head and nudge him to play, wondering what it felt like as a parent to do it with his child.
It had been too easy to fall back into routine. Get back to her shifts at DQ, girls' night every other week. Even falling into a routine of working for Rio. The girls did deliveries, pick ups and drop offs. Not at big parties but in upscale neighborhoods, back of restaurants or high rises. When they did he usually wasn't there and when he was the conversation was short. He'd address her and was cool and distant but she felt his eyes linger on her. She'd ignore it, make sure her and her girls didn't stay any longer than she had to. Pretended Annie didn't wasn't watching her.
On their second day back to Detroit Annie had come over with Ben and sat on the couch with him bouncing on her lap. She'd raced back to see him as soon as they arrived in the city. Relieved she hadn't tried to continue their conversation from the food court, Beth had forgotten her sister had even said anything until she noticed Annie following Dean's steps like she was watching a tennis game, from the kitchen to their bedroom and back as he was getting ready to a late shift. Being none too subtle.
"So what's up?" She asked as soon as the door closed behind him.
"What?" Beth came over from the kitchen, bringing Annie a mug of coffee and joining her on the couch. Ben laughed and smiled at her as she sat down, and Beth reached out to grab his hand.
"With him, is everything like, cool now?" Annie made a small waving motion with her hand. "What, are you even now?"
Ben's expression changed to curiosity as he observed Annie, matching his mom's face. Beth leaned back in her seat.
"Coworkers," Beth said simply.
"Beth, you don't go off with some guy you barely know and take a ride on-"
"Ben!" Beth interrupted whatever explicit description her sister was going to give and smiled at Ben before sipping on her coffee.
"He doesn't understand what we're talking about," She muttered. "We're still supposed to work for him? Did you think about that at all when you were ice skating that rink?"
Beth made a face like she'd just drank saltwater and shook her head a little. "It's not going to be a problem."
"Does Ruby know?"
"No."
"Oh," Annie raised her eyebrows in surprise, then seemed impressed like she was the only one to know the secret. "You better know what you're doing," she added firmly.
"I'm not doing anything." Beth put the mug down and reached her hands out for Ben. "I know that and so does he."
It had taken several weeks from then but Lucy's design worked good enough to replace the plates that had been destroyed. Rio hadn't come out and said it of course. Beth was the one who'd brought up the question, twice, and he'd finally given an answer that later the girls agreed was a yes.
It was around that point, about a month since they'd been back that Beth, thinking it was best, called off going with Ruby and Annie to deliver the bags to Rio's associates. It wasn't entirely for a made up reason as she had volunteered to take another DQ shift, even if it wasn't like there weren't other takers. She'd felt pretty good about it too. Rio had never tried to talk to her about anything beside business, never tried to pull her aside, but there was that slightly uncomfortable tension that rested at the bottom of her stomach when she saw him. It was a relief to know she'd solved the issue, only to find out Ruby and Annie were made to wait for thirty minutes when they got to the meet up point, which had never happened before.
When she'd joined them the next time they had to wait forty five minutes and Rio didn't even bother showing up. Over and over she glanced at her cell phone, messaging him, slowly boiling inside but not adding much to the other women's complaints, not wanting to draw any more attention to it. After that she made a point of showing up, and again she tried to not meet Annie's eyes when they'd be met with Rio or one of his guys within a few minutes, like nothing had happened.
Beth didn't miss that the same didn't happen when either Annie or Ruby didn't show but again said nothing, the little comments from her sister and best friend enough. Of course she'd say nothing to Rio. She hadn't even included Ruby in her negotiations with him, had just brought her along. Rio didn't say anything when he saw her, but she took it as her taking responsibility for them. Meaning she'd have to pay her dues each and every time and show up no matter what. It was a small price to pay.
And while work went on, her and Dean kept a little distance, not sharing the same bed initially, but with time they started spending more time together that they hadn't. Taking walks, having dinner with cell phones put away, going out a little more than they had in a long while.
Dean seemed eager to make things up to her and she felt a little guilty, not confessing what happened. A little. But instincts, deeply seeded instincts told her to put it in the past. What he and she did. She loved him and as they spent time together it was too easy to remember how she enjoyed his company, his humor. He was just so easy to be around, and it felt like he was hearing more than he had before.
While she didn't tell her about the side hustle she was doing, that felt like the right step to take as well. After that call at the cabin, he wouldn't be supportive, and maybe she understood it. Even though the work she was doing for Rio wasn't anything permanent, Dean would just see it as dangerous for right now. And for right now – not only her, but Annie and Ruby needed the money. That was the bottom line.
The month back was going well at least until Beth's burner phone went silent. No calls, no texts. It wasn't unusual that she wouldn't hear from him for several days, even a week between drops, but it had been ten days. Was her cell not working? But it was, Rio's phone rang but there was no answer. None to her multiple messages either voice or in writing. Annie and Ruby couldn't help. Beth was the link to him.
"Sylvie hasn't seen him. He's not at home," Annie said, sitting on Beth's couch. "He's been talking to their mom though. He's OK."
Ruby shook her head.
Mona had made it clear to Beth through text that she wouldn't be a go-between between the two of them. Beth was a little hurt to get the response, but not shocked. In their conversation at Mona's mom's house she'd made it clear she was stepping out.
"Why don't we go to that warehouse?" Annie said, her voice louder.
"Is that safe?" Ruby asked.
"Why not? That's like, his store."
Beth looked away, remembering. The last time she'd stopped by. A vacant building, like nothing had ever happened in it at all. "What makes you think he's still there?" She asked.
"Why wouldn't he be?" Annie shook her shoulders once.
"I don't know. Not exactly a place you'd want to advertise to other people like a regular store."
"Got a better idea?"
And they drove, taking Beth's car. Maybe he'd come back, Beth thought. Maybe he had a few places he moved between. But once they'd got there they found what she'd found when she'd returned. An empty deserted building. Her eyes zeroed in on the warehouse's doorknob as a cool breeze blew. A leveled weight. Of course her necklace had been long gone.
She hoped he was OK. Sylvie said he was OK. He was fine. Then what happened? Why did he cut them off?
The times that Rio had texted them often gave them a short heads up to get ready. A few times she'd even needed to take time off work. Her DQ boss was annoyed but she didn't think too much of it. Or she would've brought it up. She didn't care if Rio was pissed that she'd have to miss a drop off because she had a work shift. But she'd worked at DQ for so long and been so reliable she didn't think a few times would be an issue.
Not wanting to give up she called him. To hear nothing? It just hadn't happened before. She texted. None of them personal. None asking how he was. Not except one. She trusted Sylvie to let them know that.
It was finally a couple of days later that she got a response to the calls and texts she'd made. A time and a place. He wouldn't talk to her on the phone. Her heart skipped a little as the screen finally lit up and she held the phone closer, reading the message. Trying to read what was said between the bare words. Getting ready she found herself fixing her hair up, choosing a shirt carefully, before chastising herself again. Just like she'd had the night he'd come over and told her about Annie.
"Stop it," she told herself after the fourth time of retouching her hair, storming out of the bathroom.
She arrived at the small coffee shop, finding him sitting outside, a glass of tea in front of him.
"What's going on?" She asked as she sat down, trying to contain the relief in seeing him, quickly scanning his face for injuries. If there were, none were visible on his face.
Rio gave her a questioning look like he didn't know what she was talking about. His shirt was buttoned all the way up, just like it had been at the food court. In fact she'd seen it like it at a few of their drops.
"We haven't gotten a call in two weeks," She set her purse down.
"Yeah, we're shut down," he said matter of factly.
She widened her eyes. "What?"
"I got the heat on me. When that happens, I don't mess around," he said, sipping on his glass. "You want something?"
"No," she said quickly, swallowing the offer and any tone behind it.
The relief at watching him sit casually in front of her was nearly instantly replaced by worry. "We've been dropping everything to work whenever you call," she said, wanting to say they'd never been late, then deciding against it. She leaned slightly forward. "We need that money."
"What can I say? It's a company wide shut down, everybody's feeling the pain."
The strange unwelcome tension that always was there, despite how long it's been, was still there, bouncing between the words, between their glares. He was steadfast though. She could tell she couldn't change his mind.
"How long?" She asked as he drank more of his tea.
"Huh?"
"How long are we shut down?" She lowered his voice.
Rio shook his head at her. "Until further notice," he said, getting up, and squeezed her shoulder for a moment before walking away.
"We're shut down," Beth said, sitting at the kitchen table with Ruby and Annie. "There's no work."
"For how long?" Ruby asked.
"I don't know."
"Like a month?" Annie glanced between Ruby and Beth.
"I don't know," Beth answered again.
"What are we going to do?" Annie rubbed her hands nervously together.
"I need to think," She said.
"What do you mean? What can we do?" Ruby asked as Beth continued thinking.
Beth shook her head, still thinking. There wasn't something more she could say to Rio – that much was sure. Glancing up and reaching for her mug, she stopped as she caught Annie staring her down.
"What?" She asked, wondering if she'd missed something Annie had said.
Annie leaned forward, resting her arms on the counter. "So now can we talk about it?" She asked with a grimace.
"Talk about what?" Ruby asked, sipping on her coffee.
Beth's stomach fell.
"You remember that trip we took up north?" Annie kept her eyes on Beth before turning to Ruby. "Sylvie and gangfriend. Me and Beth. Why don't you ask us who had a good time on the trip?" She asked, emphasizing the word good.
Ruby blinked a few times and glanced at Beth briefly until a realization on her face came. Her eyebrows went up. "Oh. Oh?" She tilted her head at Annie, confused. "You and Sylvie?"
"No!" Annie raised her voice and motioned at Beth. "Her and gangfriend!"
Ruby whipped her head to zone in on Beth, her eyes wide open.
A shiver ran through Beth. She had managed to tell Ruby nothing this entire time and Ruby had never said anything. Why would she?
"That happened over a month ago!" Beth lifted her arm in exasperation.
Ruby's eyes widened even further, her mouth opening but no words coming out.
"Clearly he's all up in his feelings about it," Annie snapped.
"How does the police having their eyes on him have anything to do with me?!" Beth slapped her thigh with her hand.
Ruby made unclear voices and sounds as she spoke.
"It's not just that," Annie said crossly. She glanced at Ruby and back at Beth. "He makes us wait if you don't show up like a big baby."
"That happened just one time!"
"Listen, I'm not judging you for what you did. After what Dean did it wouldn't be shocking if you'd-" Annie's words trailed off and for a moment her features grew a little softer before she grimaced again. "You don't think that playing hide the sausage with the friendly gang leader was going to get you in trouble?"
"Was – was it good?" Ruby asked but Beth barely heard her.
"I'm going to fix this," Beth said, but her voice wavered a little.
"Yeah?" Annie raised her eye brows. "By getting-"
"Annie," Beth snapped.
"Whatever. Remember how we started off with this guy? I do. If it blows up, it blows up for all of us," Annie said, getting up and storming out. The door closed loudly behind her.
Ruby was still sitting in place, blinking at Beth, her eyes wide.
"What?" Beth asked, exasperated.
Ruby shook her head quickly back and forth as if to clear her mind. She got up from her seat. "I need, I need to sit down," she said as she headed slowly to the living room.
"You were already sitting down," Beth muttered, following her best friend.
"I can't believe you didn't tell me," Ruby said, sitting down on the couch.
"I wanted to forget it. It's not like it mattered. It didn't," Beth added firmly as Ruby tilted her head at her, doubt in her face. "It's not why we're not working," she waved her hand, thinking of Annie's accusation. Of that she was confident of.
Ruby looked down, still appearing to be processing what was said. She seemed to be considering her words. "Was it – because of-"
Beth shook her head. "I don't know. Maybe," Beth answered Ruby's unfinished question. She wasn't ready for Ruby to finish it, for Beth to hear the words she'd thought of. That her hurt from Dean's affair threw her to find comfort in someone else. To maybe get even. It wasn't that she hadn't had those very thoughts. But the reason didn't even matter when she was moving on from it. And she had no reason to believe Rio hadn't.
"The reason doesn't matter. It happened," she said, trying to keep a casual tone, when Ruby and her both knew that she'd never done something like that. "We still worked for him after, right? And Dean and I are happy. We're getting married. That's what matters. And we need to think about what we're doing now."
Ruby nodded at her, and with each nod Beth saw more questions. Thankfully she held back. Beth couldn't take more questions with the faucet of cash being cut off.
"What are we going to do?"
"Find a way to make money," Beth leaned back on her seat. She didn't want to waste more time.
The moment Ruby left she turned on her phone – not the burner cell – and searched for Mona in her contacts. "Could we talk?" She texted her.
"He said hands off."
What did that even mean?!
It wouldn't be a lie to say she was a little surprised when Mona had agreed to meet her. She happened to be in town for a few days and said they could meet down the street from DQ at the local book store. But Mona had only listened briefly to her offer they'd work for her before she stopped her.
Beth, confused, shook her face now at Mona's declaration. Who, she couldn't help but suspect, seemed to be a little pleased to share the news.
"Why?" She asked, her irritation growing. She'd been ready to try and convince Mona that she was worth another try – if not her, Ruby and Annie. Her arguments were ready, but to this response she wasn't prepared.
"I don't know," Mona shrugged, and something about her expression reminded Beth of a way Rio had looked at her. "I told you not to get between him and his money right?"
"This isn't about that," Beth motioned back and forth with her hand. "Why does he care what I do? It's not like you compete with him," she lowered her voice.
"He's not the same guy he was before we got in this business," Mona said, and Beth wasn't sure what that meant. "His cousin changed him."
"What cousin?"
Mona shook her head. She wasn't going to share. "Long story. Can't do business with you. Sorry."
"You listen to your baby brother now?" Beth snapped. "You're the oldest."
Mona laughed and Beth could hear her brother in it. "You're right. Let's say I owe him one. And before you ask, this has nothing to do with us or what happened. Even if I wanted to, this isn't happening."
She'd had to accept it right? Turned down by two siblings, she thought as Mona left her bag with her to go to the restroom. Beth's eyes fell on it as Mona disappeared from view, and she counted to herself before picking it up and digging in for her phone. Quickly searching through the names she found the one she'd looked for, saving it on her phone. By the time Mona had come back her heart was beating fast but the bag was back in its place, Beth smiling as casually as she could.
"No, dad, she doesn't know." Dean said.
Beth quietly stepped into the front room, closing the front door. Locking the door, she listened. Dean must've been in the kitchen.
"I'm not going to let her worry about that. We'll take another loan. Why not?"
She took off her coat, waiting.
"We'll make this work. Right? I know. We have savings. I just don't know how long- I thought the last three months it was getting better. Right."
Beth closed her eyes. It didn't sound like things were getting better. She waited while Dean finished the call, holding on to her coat to be ready to tell Dean she'd just come in if he'd wander into the front of the house. He didn't. Once he'd ended the call she waited a few moments, putting her coat up, taking out her cell phone.
A pot was boiling over the stove as she walked in the kitchen. "Hi," she said, walking towards it.
"Hi, I didn't hear you come in," Dean said, smiling like nothing was wrong.
She turned the heat lower. "Pot roast. Impressive," she smiled at Dean.
Dean kissed Beth and stepped aside to open the cabinet door.
Beth took another whiff of the food. She was hungry. "Your mom helped didn't she?"
"She brought the pot," Dean admitted with a charming smile, holding two plates in his hand. "I didn't have time today. I cleared my calendar but had a late meeting come up-"
"It's OK," Beth opened the cover of another pot as Dean set the table. "Is everything all right?"
"Sure. It was just my dad. I think I'm going to be doing some more hours at the showroom."
"Oh. OK."
"Things have just been a little slower," Dean put down glasses, then stopped. "But everything is OK. All right?"
Beth nodded.
"I got it under control. The holidays are coming up soon, sales always pick up then."
Her eyes went to a flyer on the counter. "What's this?"
"What? Oh – it's a palate contest. Janine was talking about it. There were flyers in the kitchen."
Beth picked up the flyer. The top prize was $250, though she was sure Dean didn't share it for the money.
"You should go, you love this stuff."
She smiled. He was right, she did. She held the flyer with both hands, smiling at the goofy graphics. They should hire Lucy to do some work for them. It touched her he'd come across it and saved it for her.
That was the first night since he told her he'd been unfaithful that she took out the travel magazines she'd put away, opened them up as she sat at the kitchen table. Saw her and Dean in the photos, trekking through Chile or watching live music in Madrid. Without wanting to, she calculated the cost of each activity. Country. The cost of the trip, the cushion she wanted Annie to have before she got married. The money Ruby needed. It was her constant thinking about money that made her think about him more than she needed.
She picked up more shifts at the DQ, even though she knew it wasn't enough. It was doing something. Dean was honest tonight. Somewhat. She understood why he hadn't told her everything either. It wasn't clear how bad things were, but she'd never walked in on a call like that. She'd try to see tomorrow, maybe there were some papers lying around to help her see just where they were. While she wanted to believe Dean, truly did, that things would get better, there was just too much going on. She wanted to help him. Help Ruby, her sister. The number she'd taken from Mona's phone. Who even knew what she was thinking getting it but. She could still use it. She could try. That thought led to another.
It was strange to meet up with him at the coffee shop. Like seeing a stranger, but not. Who she had… Some short short-lived history with. It was just bizarre. It wasn't just her who'd talked with him at a distance, he did the same to her. How was she supposed to behave with someone she was working with when they'd – had a short interlude together? Would it be a tryst? She had no other past experience like it to reference. At least seeing him went quickly. Wasn't it what she wanted? Ever since getting back to Detroit she put him and what happened behind her, focused back on her and Dean. Did everything to get back on track, to return to the life she had. Was making great progress too. So what was the problem?
Wasn't that obvious? The money was still needed. She'd been able to rely on Dean and now… All those years she'd had to rely on herself and when she'd met Dean it had changed. He would deny everything if she'd talk to him. No, there wasn't much point in doing that. It wasn't like Dean had to be the one to carry the burden of caring for them financially either. He was just so proud. She'd need to do it without making him feel insecure. Because there was no doubt in her mind she'd stop finding a way.
And then, if she really pushed, in the crevices of her mind, the rooms she didn't dare visit, she knew something else. Even if it didn't matter, even if she didn't think about it and it wasn't even top 20 problems to worry about.
She missed him. At odd moments and not all the time. It'd catch her when Dean would be sleeping beside her and she'd hear the rustle of tree branches outside their bedroom window. Take her right back to the night at the lake, images of the two of them fleeting behind her closed eyes, of her standing and watching the stars once Rio had left, stretching the early in the morning in the quiet of the kitchen as she sat and rubbed her eyes in front of her steaming coffee mug.
Annie was right. Beth remembered exactly the circumstances of how she' d met Rio. How he'd put a gun to her head. She never forgot it and there was no way she could rationally explain what happened. Even if they had spent time together, he was still that same person who'd been violent to her, Ruby, and Annie. Who because of Sylvie she was sure they were protected, if only by extension through her friendship with Annie. Of course it wasn't rational. But again, she'd ended it.
Besides, most of the times she didn't think about it. She had too much to keep her mind on. She could put it aside, not ever breathe another word to Ruby or Annie outside of what her sister had burst out with and laid out, poking at her with it. While she was still annoyed she'd said something, it was better it was aired out. It had just caused a little tension that it was never said. Felt strange for Ruby to know nothing all that time – even if she'd meant what she'd told her. Beth was moving on. She had been.
But she remembered it. The memory of them playing in the water, sitting across Lucy and closing the deal, talking and making food in the kitchen. In his room, in hers. Outside. She remembered all of it. How could they be the same guy, she'd catch herself thinking. But then she let herself be taken in by the moment. Be like her sister. It had been like a fantasy, that weekend, in some ways. Not reality. So even if some moments were sweeter, she tried to remind herself that. Between each morning to night she had plenty to do, and she trusted with time she'd fully forget.
A date, time, and intersection. That was all Rio's message said after they hadn't heard from him in two weeks. Just like he'd disappeared he reappeared. Though there was no more information she was certain. It was the greenlight they'd waited for.
Reading the text to Ruby and Annie her eyes focused at the words until they were nothing more than pixels. Over Ruby and Annie's relieved cheers and exclamation, much more over on her sister's end, she smiled as well, and set the phone down. But deep in her belly a discomfort pushed against her insides. Her relief had too quickly been overshadowed by something else. To be at the mercy of someone else, of another boss, to depend on someone else for when cash would flow again. She put the phone in her back pocket, annoyed with its presence. DQ boss wasn't enough, she had this one too, a boss who communicated on his own terms, who decided when the cash flow stopped, when it started. Who had this unsettling remaining hold on her after all this time.
She was getting tired of it.