Disclaimer: Am I still a young fanfic writer obsessed with Harry Potter with no rights whatsoever? Check.

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Chapter Ten: Out of My Head

"I – I didn't …" Lupin didn't even really look upset. Just … curious. "I didn't mean to … well, I mean I-I did, but I didn't … know they were your memories, I just …"

Lupin was now looking at the memory starting to appear before us. The scene was changing to that of the Hogwarts astronomy tower, and the figures of Lupin, James, Sirius and Pettigrew began to focus.

"I'm really sorry," I said, managing to actually not stutter. Lupin wasn't paying attention. Such a him thing to do to not pay attention to an apology. "I'm sorry," I repeated a bit louder.

"Sh!" he said.

Did he just shush me?

"Are – aren't you mad or anything? Have you no human emotions?" I went right up under his nose.

He looked down at me, almost irritated. Almost. "I don't see why I should be mad. It was my fault I left it out like this. All I'm worried about is what memories you may be exposed to."

Exposed to? What, was his life like a nuclear gas or something?

I opened my mouth to reply but, again, he wasn't paying attention.

"Bloody great view this is, Padfoot," an unknown voice said.

I turned to the scene unraveling before me. James was nudging Sirius in the arm, grinning.

"It is nice," said what looked like a sixth-year Lupin resignedly, his deep brown eyes staring up at the starry sky.

"Great make-out spot," James said, wacky grin on his face.

"Lily's never going to do that with you," said Lupin and Sirius simultaneously, both wearing extremely dull and bored expressions.

James looked heartbroken. "She might," he muttered.

Suddenly a loud banging could be heard from the outside of the door. "I know you're in there, boys!"

"McGonagall!" squeaked Pettigrew. All of them jumped to their feet, James grasping what looked like an Invisibility Cloak tight.

"Is that --?" I started, but Lupin nodded his head before I could even finish.

"There's only enough room for two or three of us," James whispered, quickly putting it on. "Can't you two do the charm you used to sneak up here?" He pointed to Lupin and Sirius. They drew their wands, but it was too late. Just as Pettigrew and James slipped under the Cloak, the door opened.

Eyes wide, I watched as Sirius grabbed Lupin's face and pressed his lips to his hastily.

"We should go now," real-life Lupin said from beside me. He looked quite embarrassed.

I fought down the urge to giggle uncontrollably.

McGonagall stormed, looking livid. "What are you -?" She stopped in mid-sentence, looking wide-eyed at the pair before her. Lupin had his eyes wide open, and was staring at McGonagall, but Sirius seemed to be playing his part very well.

I felt real-Lupin grasp my hand just as sixth-year Sirius and Lupin broke apart. "Let's go," Lupin whispered in my ear, and I almost didn't notice the shiver going down my spine.

I expected to feel the sensation of being tugged out of the Pensive, but, strangely, I felt nothing. I glanced over at Lupin, who looked thoroughly confused.

"Sorry, Professor," said Hogwarts-Sirius, looking very sheepish indeed. He could act! "We didn't mean for this to happen, really … just, suddenly, we couldn't control ourselves …"

Somewhere between giggling madly and seriously concerned, I spoke, "Why aren't we going?"

Real-life Lupin exclaimed, "I don't know!" Just as mini-Lupin cried, "Excuse me?"

McGonagall raised an eyebrow, and mini-Lupin blushed. I swore I could hear Pettigrew and James giggling. "I mean, that's r-right Professor. We couldn't stop ourselves!" mini-Lupin squeaked, the words looking painful.

"What do you mean, you don't know? Get us out! This is your pensive!" I exclaimed.

Sirius had a terrible, pleased lopsided grin on his face.

"It must be – is Sirius…?" Real-Lupin looked at me, wide-eyed.

"Yes," I answered flatly, just as McGonagall exclaimed, "Get out! Right now! I will not give out detentions or take off House points but in future, for Gods sake, find a closet!"

McGonagall stormed out of the room, closely followed by Lupin, who was wiping his lips hastily.

Sirius was looking a bit too far downward behind Lupin for my taste.

"Is he –?" Lupin started, looking quite green.

"Yes."

"But I never –"

"Well, he is."

"But – "

"He is, believe me."

Lupin looked very green indeed.

The memory started to fade with Lupin yelling at Sirius, "What was that?" And James and Pettigrew throwing off the Cloak and collapsing on the ground in laughter.

I turned back to Lupin, who seemed to have already let the Sirius thing slip, and was now looking up at the never-ending blackness, looking quite worried.

"I don't understand," he was muttering.

"We-we can't be trapped," I cried, wringing my hands together. "I have life to live! I'm not ready to die!"

Lupin looked at me, slightly patronizing. "We'll be fine, Tonks. Just breathe …" He turned away, and I stuck out my tongue at him. "It must have been sealed …"

"How could it have been sealed? Who would seal it? LUPIN!" I screamed as he continued muttering, ignoring me.

"Yes?" He said, turning back to me, looking indefinitely scholarly.

"Get. Me. Out. Of. Here!" I shrieked, jumping up and down in one spot. I couldn't help it. I didn't want to be stuck in a Pensive forever! I was scared!

"I can't," he said quite helplessly.

"I don't want to be stuck here forever," I sobbed.

"I don't want you be stuck with you, either," said Lupin mournfully.

"What's so wrong with me?" I snapped.

"Well, a lot," he said so I wasn't sure whether he was being playful or not. "But I just don't want you looking through all my … somewhat … private memories." He looked uncomfortable.

"Like your first time?" I smirked.

"Exactly like – " Lupin cut off, giving me a Look, and turning quite red.

The scene finally began to appear, and we saw the image of a quaint little house, with a white picket fence and a small front lawn. Though it was placed in a small, cozy little neighborhood, the house seemed somewhat insolated from the rest of the houses.

"Is this your house?" I asked.

"My childhood one, yes," answered Lupin, looking plaintively down at his feet.

I wrinkled my brow. "Well, no need to be embarrassed. It's not that ugly –" Lupin looked up and glared at me, "–er, not ugly at all."

Lupin looked back down at his shoes. "It's not that," I thought I heard him mumble.

The next second I saw the image of a younger Lupin strutting up to said house. Well, not really strutting, but it was the best word to use. He kind of looked like he had a wedgie or something.

I narrowed my eyes, and saw what I believed to be the figure of a girl. I couldn't really tell. Did I mention it was nighttime? Well, it was nighttime.

"That's it," I heard young-Lupin mumble. His words were slurred a bit.

I giggled. "Are you drunk?" I asked real-life Lupin.

He went pink and mumbled something that sounded like, "Itwasalongtimeago."

I giggled some more, following closely behind the two, rounding quickly in on the house. The girl was obviously totally plastered, as she couldn't walk in a straight line and was leaning heavily on Lupin, who luckily seemed to have a teensy bit more control.

"You know I fink you're experimentally hot," slurred the girl through bouts of giggles. I had no clue what she meant by experimentally. I heard Lupin groan from beside me.

The younger-Lupin … giggled and nudged her playfully. I caught real-Lupin's eyes and mimed gagging. His jaw steeled, and he grasped my elbow tightly.

"Ow! You're hurting me!" I cried, swatting his arm with my other.

"That's it, we're going. Now!" He bellowed the last word, as if the intensity of it would just magically take us out of the Pensive. There was an eerie silence for a moment, before Lupin let go of my elbow, and made frustrated sounds while throwing his arms up helplessly in the air.

"It was … er … a good try?" I smiled hugely and fakely, but Lupin didn't seem to notice.

"Someone must have sealed this," he was muttering, feeling around in the dark.

"Well, you're not doing any good feeling around like you're a blind man," I told him, and he responded with just looking at me. I have to admit, it was unnerving. For a wimp. "Let's just sit back and enjoy the show."

"These are my memories," he said in horror.

"Oh, stop being such a drama queen," I snapped. He looked at me again, in such a way I knew he was trying desperately to hold back the venom he was feeling. "You've proven yourself to be quite interesting."

"Oh, that's good," he said boredly, crossing his arms over his chest.

Just then, younger Lupin and Drunk n' Stupid Gal reached the door. "Ooh! Look!" I jumped up in excitement, and ran up really close to the scene. Lupin barred his teeth and followed me.

"Can you please close your eyes?" He asked me suddenly.

"Huh?" I responded, paying no attention to him. The scene at hand was getting quite interesting.

"Close your eyes," he repeated, and I felt a pair of thin hands shield my eyes suddenly.

"Hey! Stop it!" I said, struggling with his firm grasp. "What is your problem?"

"These are my memories, and –" I bit his hand hard, and withdrew it rapidly with a loud yelp. "What was that!"

But I wasn't listening. Suddenly I could see why Lupin hadn't wanted me looking. Younger-Lupin and the girl were now making out and touching each other in ways I had rather not wanted to see.

Disgusted, and an unusual painful tugging sensation sweeping through my body, I turned away, my face flushed.

"Sorry," I mumbled, but I couldn't bear to look at Lupin. There was silence for a moment, before I could hear an unfamiliar male voice yell loudly,

"Remus Lupin! What do you think you're playing at? Who's she? What are you doing here? Remus? Remus!"

I snuck a glance at the scene, and saw both Lupin's blushing profusely. I couldn't help but smile. Real-Lupin caught my expression and rolled his eyes. I stuck out my tongue.

"I-I," young-Lupin stammered, suddenly sober.

"I hafta go," slurred the girl, who obviously wasn't. "Bye." She attempted to kiss Lupin, but he moved away. She left without a second glance.

The brusque man was left with Lupin, his small moustache twitching furiously. "Is that your dad?" I mouthed to Lupin, forgetting the scene before us wasn't actually going on right now.

Lupin stared down at his shoes, nodding slowly. I bit my lip, pretending it wasn't funny.

Lupin-Elder was a large, pale man, with an overflowing belly and an unshaven face, but not to the point of a beard. Just a small, brown moustache, clashing comically with his thoroughly gray hair. He seemed to barely have any eyebrow, and his large brown eyes seemed to be the only attractive feature on his body, yet they seemed painfully out-of-place.

I stuck a glance at real-Lupin, and then again at younger Lupin. They had, indeed, inherited the man's eyes. And rather then the whole graying hair factor, it seemed to be the only thing.

"What have you been doing, boy?" Lupin-Elder demanded, spit flying from his mouth as he spoke. I grimaced, and stepped backwards. Real-Lupin sent me what looked like an apologetic glance.

When younger Lupin failed to answer, Lupin-Elder neared him, looking very angry indeed. "You know what the rules are about girls!" he yelped, his voice sounding more like an upset puppy dog than menacing, really.

"I'm sorry," younger Lupin said, not meeting his father's eyes.

"And you should be, Remus!" his father said, grabbing the boy's face and lifting it up to his own. I winced compulsively, and looked away hastily as Lupin's eyes found mine. "And you've been drinking …" His father sighed impatiently, "You know the rules, Remus!"

"Jack?" A distant voice sounded. I paused for a moment. It sounded almost exactly like Lupin's, save for the feminine quality. It was soft, yet slightly hoarse. Quite nice, really…

I shook my head hastily, and tried to concentrate at the situation at hand. "Jack?" the voice called again, momentarily followed by a body. The woman standing by Lupin-Elder ("Jack") was extremely thin, so much so that she looked ill. There were bags under her eyes, and her skin was an unnatural yellow color. Her eyes held a dark blue sparkle, and her lips were heavy and red. Her hair framed her face in black wisps, the rest of it held up tightly in a bun. I understood she must be Lupin's mother, but I was nevertheless surprised. I had expected her to look more like Lupin, as his father so obviously did not. Beside the extreme skinniness, she held less resemblance to Lupin than his father did. I surveyed real-Lupin again. He really did look nothing like his parents.

"Mariette, go back in the house," Lupin-Elder said quickly. I couldn't help but pick up on a note of panic and worry in his voice. I looked over at Lupin, but he was staring blankly in the opposite direction.

"No, Jack …" She smiled at younger Lupin, the corners of her eyes crinkling warmly. "You're being to hard on him. He's young, he needs to …" Suddenly her eyes widened, and her body racked with wheezing coughs.

Younger Lupin and Jack both jumped towards her, whispering warmly towards her, and ushering her into the house.

The memory started to fade, and I fell back against something hard, my breathing uneven. Lupin's mother … she must have been sick … I glanced over at Lupin, and saw he still seemed to be in another place. She must have died. My heart prodded painfully, and I unknowingly found myself going towards Lupin.

"I'm sorry," I said, and he glanced up at me, confused. "About your mother," I clarified, tugging on the edge of my sleeve.

"It's in the past," he said, smiling wistfully.

There was a momentary silence, which I felt compelled to break, "You don't look like them."

Lupin glanced up me, "I know. I look like my grandfather, on my mother's side." Not waiting for me to reply, he reached into his pocket, and drew out an old photograph. "Here," he said, handing it to me, "that's him."

I almost gasped. The man in the picture looked exactly like Lupin, save for the dark green eyes this man was sporting. His jaw was strong, his face clean-shaven, and his hair a mousy brown, and hanging just over his eyes. His smile was wide and cheerful, a set of white, slightly crooked teeth gleaming out at me. He was breathtaking.

I blushed as I realized my mouth had been hanging open, and I quickly gave the picture back to Lupin, who pocketed it without a word. "You …" I cleared my throat. "You look just like him."

"I know," he said, smiling slightly. That smile.

There was a moment of silence, getting more and more awkward with every breath. "So," I asked quickly, "how are we going to get out of here?"

"Well," Lupin leaned back slightly, his eyes watching the new scene begin to clear in front of us. "We wait."

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A/N: Thank you everyone for all the reviews. They are very, very much appreciated!