Blue and green eyes opened slightly and glanced around the slightly crowded, small, smelly room. They'd managed to scrounge up a little money to pay for a single cramped motel room, if you could even call it that. Kiba seemed uncomfortable and tense, but the others didn't seem to mind so much. Toboe slept as soundly as ever, as did Hige, but Tsume stayed up for quite some time, silently staring at a wall, deep in thought. Finally, he, too, had drifted off, leaving Silver and Kiba alone in their wakefulness. The white wolf was faced in the other direction, staring at the wall with his deep eyes, lost in his mind. Silver leaned against a wall and stared upward at the ceiling, drifting into memories…
The black wolf saw an opportunity, leaping forward at Rian and snapping her jaws at his throat. When she missed, she leapt away, avoiding every last gunshot from the soldiers around them and disappearing into the cold, snowy night…
It had all been that bitch's fault. If she hadn't attacked, Claire would still be alive, and Silver wouldn't stay up night after night crying and wishing she were still here. No matter how the others thought she was, she wasn't okay. She never would be. Ever.
Eventually, even Kiba drifted off, and Silver was alone again… Always alone, it seemed. For some time, she'd figured that she'd have Claire, and she'd never be alone again after that… But now, even Claire was gone… Even though she stayed with the boys, it wasn't really for their destination of Paradise, but for their company… Even surrounded by her new pack, her only pack, she felt so alone…
Her head tilted backwards, bumping into the wall slightly, but enough to send a short jolt of pain through her. The pain pulled her from her trance, and she choked out a quiet sob, leaning her face forward and hiding it in her hands. She was sure to be quiet; however, because she told herself she didn't want to burden the boys with her problems from moons long passed. She was startled out of her self-pity and grief, however, by a gruff,
"What the hell are you crying about?"
Tsume remained in the same position he'd been in before, on his back with one knee bent, but turned his head in her direction and opened a single eye to gaze at her.
"Nothing," Silver replied shortly, swallowing her tears and hurriedly wiping them from her milky white human cheeks. Her own eyes stared coldly back into his single open one, though his wasn't nearly as harsh as it usually seemed to be.
"You don't need to get all pissy, I just wanted to know…" he told her with a shrug, closing his eye back up and returning his face towards the ceiling.
"Sorry…" her voice softened, and she lowered her eyes to the floor. The tears started to rise again, pooling up and blurring her vision, but she tried her hardest to force them back down.
"Don't worry about it, but seriously, what's your major malfunction?" his face tilted back down towards her, and this time both eyes opened upon her slouched form.
"I was thinking about… Claire… again…" she sniffed deeply.
"Oh…" His own voice softened, and he sat up a little, leaning on an elbow as he watched her with what looked like pity. She didn't want pity, though! … Or did she?
"I miss her…. She was all I had, you know. You guys are so lucky…" she added, trailing off.
"Why do you say that?"
"You have each other. No matter how much you want to beat the shit out of each other sometimes, you have someone else to keep you company… Do you know what its like to be alone, Tsume? Totally, utterly, completely alone…?"
Tsume lay down and stared up at the ceiling thoughtfully. Finally, after a long pause, he practically whispered, "Yes…"
Silver had let her eyes rest on the floor while she had been speaking, but they were immediately on him as he had spoken. "Really…? Without anyone, whatsoever?"
"Yes…" he said again, still staring at the ceiling.
"Have you ever felt alone, yet surrounded by others…?"
"Yes."
Okay, so the next chapter is going to have spoilers about Tsume's past.
And they may not be entirely accurate.
Remember that I haven't watched the episode where he tells Toboe in over a year.
I know, there's Youtube and stuff, but…. I'm too lazy.
I may just get my lazy ass around to looking it up on Youtube or something, but don't expect it, 'kays?
Muse:eyeroll: