Disclaimer no character from BtVS belongs to me, and I don't get money fort his story in any way

Pairing: there will be romance, but I won't/can't tell anything about it, because it would destroy the suspense.

A.N I don't know, how it was in the series, because I couldn't see this season, but this is going to be an AU story, so it doesn't matter: in my story Anya and Xander are still going to marry and they life together in Xanders apartment. Giles has got one on his own and Tara and Willow, too. Buffy and Dawn are living (of course) together. But also Spike lives with them, to take care of Dawn and because he can help the Scoobys better when he lives near them. I don't know yet, if there's going to be a relationship between Buffy and Spike. But actually it doesn't really matter, because this is going to be about Dawn.

Memories of a doll

After Glorys defeat, everything in Sunnydale became normal again (for Sunnydale standard at least). And although Buffy and the Scoobys knew now, that Dawn wasn't her real sister, for them nothing changed. Dawn was one of them, part of their family. And although there were of course little arguments, and although sometimes they were getting on each others nerves, this all just belonged to their family life. But the Scoobys Spike and Xander first, notice some changes on Dawn and also Anya. First they thought that was because of the big fight they fought just some days ago. But when the two spend more and more time together, the two men saw something bigger behind it. Because of their worries they lay down their own hostility and sat down to have a talk.

„You know, my friend, I have nothing against Anya and Dawn spending more time together. I mean, hey, I like to see, that Dawnster and my fiancé like each other, because they are both important for me, but what has changed between them? They seem to be best friends now, just from one day to another. And I can't find an explanation for it."

„First: I am not you friend", Xander rolled his eyes, „and secondly I think you are right.Dawn has changed in many ways, and I don't know, if I like it. She is often so quiet, with everything so serious, and have you seen her glances sometimes? She could almost compete to me. That's not my little Nibblet anymore. Not the sweet innocent girl she was. "

„Yes, I am afraid our little Dawnie has grown up. But not in a way I like. And Anya! She has become so quiet, too. "

„Oh yeah", Spike threw in, „It's been a long time since we heard this amusing little stories about your sexlife. We really miss them."

„Haha, Spike, very funny. But seriously: she is so shy now, as if she was afraid of something. That doesn't make any sense, I mean, Glory is dead. But then the both could know something, we don't know. And if you ask me that would be nothing good…."

Spike and Xander decided, not to talk to Dawn and Anya, but to have an eye on them. Perhaps they were wrong, and the strange behaviour was just temporally

But some days after their talk, something happened, that made them come to the conclusion, that the problem with Dawn was everything but harmless. Dawn ran away from home.

When Buffy came back from work on that day, Dawn wasn't there. That was no problem for her, because her sister had told Spike she would spend the weekend at her friends. Buffy was instead happy about that, because Dawn was very depressive, when she heard that she wasn't human and had nearly no contact to kids of her age. She shivered, when she thought back to the day, Spike had found her in the bathroom, with all the blood on her, because she wanted to know, if she was real. But this phase in Dawns life was over now, and they could go back to their normal life after Glorys defeat. Well, as normal as a slayer and her family could live…. But when Buffy called this friend of Dawns on the next day, because she had noticed, that Dawn had forgotten her teeth brush, the mother told her, that Dawn never came to them. Her first thought was, that it was a boy-thingy. She ran into her sisters' room to see if she could find any hint in her diary. She couldn't find it in any hiding place she knew her sister had, instead she noticed an envelope on the desk with her name on it. She opened it and took the folded peace of paper out of it. With shaking hands she began to read.

Dear Buffy,

When you read this, I'm on my way to LA. Don't worry, I didn't run away with a boy. Or with a girl, if that was your next thought.

I had much more important reasons. I cannot tell you what it is yet, but many things changed in my life during the last days. I have… learned something about me, or better have remembered something, that is very, very important for me. Not everything is clear now, and it is difficult to tell it via letter. For that reason you should go and ask Anya about it. She knows everything.

Please don't worry, I am not going to wander around the streets of LA all by my own. I will go to Angel and ask him to let me stay at his for a while. Then I can also test, in how far the monks changed the memory of the people around me. But I'm sure, that Angel will also help me without remembering me.

Please don't follow me to LA. I am sure, you think you're doing me good with taking me back home, but for me it would be bad. I have to do this on my own. I can just repeat myself: Anya can explain it. When I found the answers to my questions, I will come back. If they aren't too frightening……

Love, Dawn.

AN: Ok, I will end here with a cliff-hanger hope you aren't mad at me, it's just fort he suspense. Normally, I would post the next chapter in a week, but for every review I get I will post it a day earlier.