Alexis's whole body felt heavy, and her lower abdomen contorted with cramping as she awoke. All her muscles throbbed as she shivered in a tangled mess of wet sheets. She was so cold! After a futile attempt at raising her head, she accepted she was far too weak to do anything more than just lie in agony and shiver. As she tried futilely to take a breath amidst the rigors she wondered if she was dying or if she just felt like she was. That was far too familiar too.

May 10, 1980

Searing throbbing cramps forced Alexis Davidovitch conscious. "Owww, owww, Owww!" she moaned as her belly throbbed. It was impossible to get a breath. She was so cold!

"You need to leave this oxygen mask on. It is helping you breathe," a woman in a white uniform said as she shoved a plastic mask back onto Alexis's face and tightened a strap.

"Please try to lie still, all this moving is just getting you overheated. Your gown is drenched again and you're running a high fever," the same woman said as she replaced Alexis's gown with a dry one and then laid a dry sheet over the top.

"How are we doing in here?" an unfamiliar male voice asked.

Alexis began to shiver.

"Not well. Her breathing is getting worse, and she seems so uncomfortable. Her blood pressure is too low to give any more of the Ativan and her temperature is back up to 103.6"

"I think it is time we get this baby out of her. Call anesthesia we're going to do a forceps assisted vaginal delivery and honestly I don't see her participation in that process helpful at all!"

"Oh, honey, I'm so sorry. I thought you were doing better," Julian said. His kissed her forehead and then gently worked her body first free of the soaking wet sheets and then removed her wet gown.

Everything felt so surreal for Alexis as she laid exposed, shivering, and far too exhausted to move. When he returned moments later, her muscles ached with exhaustion as he worked her limbs into a dry gown. Then he covered her with a new sheet and blanket before he sat down on the bed and started massaging her shoulders gently. That was also eerily familiar.

December 19, 1982

Alexis Davis gritted her teeth as another wave of chills passed over her exhausted aching muscles. Everything hurt and she was so cold, but she had no energy to even begin to figure that out, turn up the heat, or even find an extra blanket. Silky fur brushed across her cheek as she realized someone was draping another blanket over her and then she felt strong arms squeeze her shoulders almost as if they were tucking her in. That hadn't happened in years. So, at first, she was sure that she was dreaming but then she opened her eyes and saw him.

"How are you feeling?" Julian Jerome asked as lowered himself onto the edge of the bed and brushed some whisps of hair off her forehead.

"Cold, weak, everything hurts," Alexis struggled to get the words out.

"I'm sure it does. I'm afraid you might have the flu," Julian said.

Alexis's mind felt fuzzy. It was hard to focus on what he was saying, and she felt her eyelids drooping. "I don't feel well," she mumbled.

"I know, but it's ok. Your finals are all over and I'm going to take care of you, so you just rest right now." Julian whispered as he leaned down and gently kissed her cheek.

"Is that any better, honey?" Julian asked.

Responding to him required energy Alexis didn't have. Unfortunately breathing also seemed to require energy she didn't have. She felt strong arms wrapping around her again and pulling her up to lean back against him.

"Just relax, honey, I'm right here. Just try to slow your breathing a little. Nice and easy, you're doing great sweetheart," Julian said.

It actually was a little better sitting up and in his arms. Alexis managed to take a shaky breath as she felt Julian gently kiss her forehead. The whole situation was overwhelming and very surreal, but that reminder of his presence helped more than Alexis could explain or even understand.

"I wish this was all easier for you, but you are so much stronger than you realize and you're going to get through this. You really are, and don't worry I'm not going anywhere!" Julian said.

As she released another shaky breath, Alexis needed to trust that. Perhaps that was desperation. She was afraid it was. Or maybe it was just reality, and she really didn't have another choice. Because, as she struggled to release another breath, Alexis was well aware of that.