Chapter 4 – Return to Konoha; an Odd Meeting between Jinchuriki
Later that night, after returning from the battle on the bridge, everyone sat at the dinner table conversing with one another and just enjoying simple small talk for the most part. Naruto, unfortunately, wasn't behaving as he usually did. Instead the young blonde was silent and barely ate a thing.
Noticing this, Haku excused himself, gently grabbed his friend's hand, and led the young Uzumaki outside and down to the small dock near Tazuna's house. Sitting down with his friend, the ice-user stared out at the water with a frown on his face. Just in case one of the others decided to try and eavesdrop, the young man decided to keep his voice low as he spoke to his friend. "Naruki, I'm worried about you. You need to eat, and you need to talk to somebody about what happened earlier. Please just say something, okay?"
Not willing to risk her true gender being discovered by her team or Zabuza just yet, Naruki simply rested her head on Haku's shoulder with the necklace still latched around her neck. "Sorry Haku-kun, I just don't feel much like eating right now. Every time I close my eyes, I see what I did to those monsters. But…the smell of their bodies roasting like charred meat…I still feel like I can smell it. I…really just don't have an appetite right now."
The kind-hearted young man next to her nodded slowly and wrapped Naruki in a one-armed hug, making her sidle a bit closer. Honestly, neither of them really cared what the others thought about them at the moment. If they wanted to spread some kind of rumor about the two of them being interested in the same sex throughout the village of Konoha upon their return, it wouldn't bother them. Why? Because at least they'd still know the truth of the matter and they'd continue to remain friends, even if they were ostracized by the majority of the village.
"I know it's hard Naruki-chan. And I know you're most likely not feeling guilty about taking their lives, but rather shaken up because it was so much worse than you could have imagined your first kill being. Am I right?" Seeing Naruki nod slowly, Haku went ahead and kissed her forehead, despite the genjutsu still being in effect. As Naruki smirked up at him, clearly finding amusement in her companion doing such a thing, the ice-user simply smirked right on back. "What?"
"You sure you want to do that? It's quite the risk, especially considering Zabuza's watching us from the doorway right now. It just gives him more reason to 'question your sexuality', doesn't it?" Giggling to herself, Naruki nuzzled into Haku's neck and yawned quietly to herself.
Haku didn't even glance over his shoulder. Instead he decided to prove a point to his new friend. Reaching down slowly, he gave Naruki's butt a little pinch and caused her to jump in place. As soon as the blonde turned her gaze on him, ready to yell at him, the ice-user leaned in and kissed 'Naruto's' lips before pulling back and smirking wider. "Does that answer your question? We know the truth and that's good enough for me. Let them think whatever they want."
Seeing Haku smiling sweetly at her after saying that, Naruki smirked over at Zabuza for a moment before throwing her arms around Haku's neck, leaning in close, and kissing him rather passionately for a moment. Pulling back, she nodded her head, a bright smile on her face. "Haku-kun, you're really wonderful, do you know that?"
Haku chuckled quietly to himself for a time before hugging Naruki close once more. "Hey, you're feeling better now right? Then I'll gladly take the compliment." Glancing down into Naruki's eyes as she leaned into him, the black-haired young man's features softened and he rested his head gently atop hers. "Now, since you seem to be feeling better, I just have to ask something. Was it really important to shout something like that on the bridge? You have no idea how embarrassing that was."
Naruki giggled cutely to herself before turning her head and giving Haku a quick peck on the cheek before nuzzling into him again. "Thank you Haku-kun. I mean it. As for what I did on the bridge..." Grinning, the young Uzumaki reached up and flicked Haku in the nose. "Of course it was. I'm a prankster, and I'm known for being unpredictable y'know? Besides, I thought it was funny."
Haku Yuki sighed and nodded his head slowly as he closed his eyes. "Of course. Well, I've come to terms with what you did, and I'm not bothered by your actions. It's part of what makes you you after all. And you know what? I wouldn't change who you are for anything. You're a wonderful person."
As Haku and Naruto cuddled together in that intimate way, Zabuza and Kakashi were watching from the entrance of the house. Kakashi eventually turned his eye on the Demon of the Hidden Mist and quirked a brow. "Have you heard anything they've said? I saw the kissing earlier, but…I'm not sure I can believe my eye."
Zabuza Momochi shook his head and sighed as he slapped a hand over his face. "I haven't heard a word. Besides, it's not my place to eavesdrop. I only wanted to watch after them and make sure they stayed safe. I didn't expect to have to watch…THAT though." Turning to Kakashi, the large swordsman clapped his hands on the Sharingan-user's shoulders and stared him hard in his eye. "Tell me Kakashi: did I do something to make Haku this way? I tried to raise him right…"
At that, Kakashi quirked a brow and quickly shook his head. "I won't even comment on that last bit. As for Haku, I wouldn't worry too much. He's mature enough to make his own decisions, and I don't think you really care so long as the boy's happy, am I right?"
The brown-haired swordsman sighed and shook his head. "You're right. It's just…learning Haku was interested in his fellow man was a huge shock to me. Maybe I should just be grateful he isn't trying to check out my ass or something."
Kakashi chuckled at that and shrugged his shoulders before giving Zabuza his trademark eye smile. "There we go, that's the way to do it. Look on the bright side. Besides, they look happy together, so let's not question it. I just wonder how those in the village will take this bit of news if they see the two of them together like this."
Zabuza shrugged his shoulders and went to speak before they both noticed Sakura standing in the doorway watching the two boys down at the dock. She had a finger in her mouth and was mumbling to herself. Upon listening closer, they could hear what she was saying, or at least part of it. "That's actually kind of hot. Boy-on-boy action, who knew it could be so…so…romantic?" Giggling to herself, the pink-haired girl nibbled lightly on her fingernail before turning and walking back inside.
Looking at each other, the two men sweat dropped before smiling at each other and shrugging. "Well, if Sakura-chan's reaction is anything to go on, I guess we won't have too much to worry about from the female population?"
Zabuza let out a hearty laugh and slapped Kakashi Hatake on the shoulder as they turned to head back inside. "Who knew women were so into men-on-men action, eh Kakashi?" Continuing to laugh and talk together, they disappeared inside Tazuna's home and left Naruto and Haku down at the dock. They would come back inside and get some sleep when they felt like it after all.
1 ½ weeks later – Bridge
It was the day that Team 7 had to leave. Their mission was finished, the bridge had been finished, and the Land of Waves was free and safe once more. They were standing on the bridge with their new comrades, Zabuza and his apprentice Haku Yuki, who had apparently become something akin to a boyfriend to good Naruto during their stay in Wave.
Kakashi had decided that if he got to see Jiraiya, the legendary Toad Sannin, sometime soon, that he would inform him about the oddity that is the female mind. He had spied Sakura sneaking around and taking photographs with a small, portable camera. It wasn't the greatest device in the world, but it sure as hell served her purposes well. Once back in Konoha, she would take the time to get these pictures developed and share them with Ino and their friends. After all, as Sakura would oftentimes comment with a blush, Haku and Naruto together was 'hot'.
So, knowing this, Kakashi Hatake decided that if Jiraiya were to begin writing a series focusing on two men in a romantic relationship, the female demographic would likely swarm to buy it if his pink-haired genin's behavior was anything to go on. It may be difficult for the Toad Sannin at first, but there were two very positive things that would come about from him taking the time to write a new series focusing on male-on-male romance.
The first positive would naturally be the amount of money Jiraiya would make from the series. There were a lot of women in the world, and Kakashi was sure that a large number of them would gladly read such a series. The second, and most important positive, at least as far as Kakashi Hatake was concerned, was the possibility that, with this new series, women would stop denouncing the Icha Icha series and stop treating all men that dared read that series as hopeless perverts! It would still be true, mind you, but at least he'd have some peace from the female harassment!
After saying their good-byes to the villagers, Team 7 set off across the bridge. Seeing as how the six of them were ninja, if they moved at a solid pace, it wouldn't take more than a week to reach Konohagakure. As they crossed the bridge, Naruto walked next to Haku and took the ice-user's hand in his. Smiling at each other, the two engaged in small talk, mostly just enjoying each other's company. Zabuza and Kakashi were lost in conversation, while Sakura and Sasuke walked at the back of the group. The pinkette couldn't help but watch Haku and Naruto ahead of them and giggled, obviously still enjoying their 'romance'. The Uchiha next to her just shook his head and sighed angrily. This is going to be a long trip.
As the team of six left, Tazuna smirked and shook his head. After a few brief moments, his daughter, Tsunami, looked to her father. "Tou-san, what are you going to name the bridge now that it's completed?"
The old man shook his head again and shrugged his shoulders. "Honestly? I have no idea. I'd love to name it after Naruto, but 'The Great Naruto Bridge' just…that doesn't really fit with his image, now does it?"
Tsunami nodded her head and turned to see Team 7 disappear from sight upon reaching the other side of the bridge. "That's true. Naruto is…unique. Oh! I have an idea! How about 'The Jolly Naruto Bridge'?! I think it fits!"
Tazuna scratched his chin in thought for a moment before he finally nodded his head. "That sounds like as good a name as any. You're right Tsunami; I think that's probably the best name we could come up with. It's certainly better than 'The Odd Naruto Bridge' or 'The Crazy Naruto Bridge', or some other name along that line of thinking." The villagers all began to laugh together and each of them agreed with the name that had been chosen for the bridge.
Five Days Later – Gates of Konoha
The duo that had been nicknamed the 'Eternal Chunin' by some were currently at their usual posts, guarding one of the gates of Konoha. These two were known as Kotetsu Hagane and Izumo Kamizuki. They have been best friends for a long time, and were responsible for a variety of duties. Most often they were seen guarding the gates, just like today.
These two had been at their posts for a couple of hours now, and like usual, there was hardly any traffic. Only two people had passed through the gates so far. One was a merchant leaving to continue peddling his wares to the various towns dotting the country of Hi no Kuni while the other was someone choosing to visit Konohagakure for a time. Other than that, these two were bored out of their minds and had eventually resorted to playing various games.
At first, these two had decided to play a game called 'I Spy'. This is a simple game where people take turns and say: "I spy with my little eye…" or something similar and then give a clue as to something they see. Once someone guesses correctly what it is the 'spy' chose, that person then takes their turn. Needless to say, Izumo and Kotetsu quickly grew bored of this activity and decided to switch to something else instead.
As Team 7, plus two, neared the gates, the two chunin guards were seen playing poker with one another. They were betting money, and it seemed like Izumo was taking Kotetsu for every cent he had, much to his friend's irritation. When the two finally spotted Team 7, they grinned and waved to their favorite little blonde knucklehead. "Yo Naruto, glad to see you're back! How'd the mission go?!"
Naruto dashed on ahead, pulling the rabbit out of his backpack and held it out to the two chunin as he reached them. "See? See?! I got a rabbit! I call him Cushy! Isn't he cute?!"
Izumo and Kotetsu both quirked their eyebrows before looking at each other. Shrugging, they chalked this up to their friend's usual randomness before returning their gazes to Naruto and his new pet. "Uhhh, that's really great for you Naruto-kun. Why don't you tell us about your mission and how you came across this new pet of yours?"
The blonde boy grinned and nodded furiously for a time as he hugged little Cushy close to his body. "It was fun! We beat the crap out of these two chunin called the Demon Brothers and then met this guy Zabuza. He tried to scare us and kill our client, Tazuna, but I took him down with my Crotch-Seeker! It was funny, especially when Kakashi hugged him and they started crying together."
Izumo and Kotetsu both paled considerably as they looked to Kakashi and who they recognized as the Demon of the Hidden Mist, Zabuza Momochi. Not even bothering to question it, they both looked to Naruto and couldn't help but remember the time Naruto had hit Hiruzen with the Crotch-Seeker.
Flashback
Izumo and Kotetsu had delivered another couple stacks of forms that needed to be read over and signed to the Sandaime, a clear look of apology on both of their faces as they saw his expression drop into a sour one. Offering to assist him with some of his paperwork, the Eternal Chunin brought up chairs and sat nearby, helping him go over the forms and other things they could do to help him.
After a few minutes of this, Naruto rushed into the office and began spouting off some kind of randomness that the two chunin hadn't paid much attention to, at least not until the Sandaime stood up and walked around the desk to speak with the young boy. Shrugging, the two perked up and glanced to the two to see what was going on.
"So y'see Jiji, I can't think of just the perfect way to empower my Crotch-Seeker further. It's strong and it brings even some of those ninja meanies to their knees, but it could be so much more powerful, don't you think?!"
Paling at this, the chunin looked from Naruto to their Hokage, not sure what the old man was going to say in response. "Hmm, I see what you're trying to say Naruto-kun. Have you thought about training with weights to increase your strength? Maybe you should actually train with Katsuo and Chikao? The two of them would likely be able to help you out more than I could for something such as that."
Izumo and Kotetsu looked terror-stricken at the thought of this 'Crotch-Seeker' becoming stronger than it already was. They had only heard rumors thus far of this powerful weapon, but they had yet to see it firsthand. The two prayed that they never had to witness such a thing.
"That makes sense Jiji. Weights and training would certainly help me to strengthen my attack. But first, maybe you could take a look at my form and see if I'm doing anything wrong? I came up with the attack and all, but maybe you can spot some flaws in my style or something and offer some more advice that way!" Naruto exclaimed, clearly excited at the prospect of getting some more help from his dear Jiji.
When the Sandaime nodded in response and smiled at his favorite young blonde, Naruto jumped up and down in place, clearly eager to test his precious weapon out. For a time, Hiruzen Sarutobi watched as young Naruto threw his Crotch-Seeker at nothing but air, trying to show the Hokage his form.
After a time, Hiruzen ordered Naruto to stop. "I see. You've got a good form, but it could certainly use some refinement. For instance, your stance is a little off. If you're going for pure power, you're doing fine. But the problem is, the attack is too slow. What you need to do is practice on increasing the speed of your punch as well. At the moment, your attack is too easy to dodge or block, if one so chose to risk blocking your attack in the first place." The old man explained sagely.
Thinking on it a little more, Hiruzen Sarutobi nodded again and decided to prove his point to young Naruto. "Face me Naruto-kun. Try to hit me with your Crotch-Seeker and I'll show you what I mean. Afterwards, how about I help you on your form? Then we'll get you started on the weight training and we can get Katsuo and Chikao to assist you however they can. Sound good?"
Naruto nodded and grinned as he turned and took the same stance he had been using. Sadly, right as he began to use his Crotch-Seeker, Hiruzen's secretary knocked on the door and announced that the Hokage had a meeting to get to. When the Sandaime raised his head to tell the woman that he'd be there shortly, the young blonde's Crotch-Seeker connected with the old man's genitals.
The scream that Naruto's dear Jiji elicited was so loud that birds were scared from their perches in the trees, people sleeping were woken from their slumber, and everyone throughout the village of Konoha and even beyond heard it. The scream was so high-pitched and loud that even the glass of his windows quivered in place. It was a miracle that they didn't shatter.
When the Hokage finally stopped screaming, his eyes widened in horror as he fell to his knees, clutching at his genitalia before falling over on his side. Everyone in the room watched as the Sandaime's body twitched involuntarily and he began foaming at the mouth. It didn't take much longer for tears to begin streaming down the poor man's face.
Naruto looked at his friends, the Eternal Chunin, and blinked a couple of times. "Hey, guys? Did you two hear a 'pop'?"
Izumo and Kotetsu were crying as well, the sheer sight and sound of seeing the Sandaime struck by the all powerful Crotch-Seeker was just too much to bear as men. Slowly, they both nodded to Naruto's question and their hands shot to their genitalia as well.
Soon, they all heard the Hokage muttering to himself, agony and fear in his voice. "I…I think it popped…my ball popped! And…where's the other one? Did it retreat up into my body somewhere?! Agh, it hurts so fucking much! I…oh Kami…please make this pain stop!"
Everyone in the room sweat dropped at this and decided that it would probably be best if the Sandaime wasn't forced to attend that meeting. Instead, the secretary wisely decided to reschedule it for a later date while she and Neko took their Hokage to the hospital for immediate medical attention.
Left in the room alone with Naruto, who turned his attention on the two of them, the Eternal Chunin found themselves in fear for their own genitalia. "Is Jiji going to be okay?"
Present Time
Needless to say, the mere memory of that scream made the two best friends want to cry for their Hokage's lost testicle. The other one had eventually returned to where it was meant to be, but the one that had popped could never be restored. When they had learned that, the Eternal Chunin hugged their Hokage and gave him their condolences. It was an odd happening that nobody quite expected, but considering the circumstances, nobody could blame them.
Returning their attention to Naruto, they continued to listen to his story. "Anyways, after reaching Tazuna's house, I kinda hit this little boy and Sasuke with it too. While it was funny, I couldn't help but feel kinda bad afterwards."
Sweat dropping at this information, Izumo and Kotetsu looked at each other before turning their gaze to the Uchiha. "So, think he'll still be able to birth an heir or two? I wouldn't be surprised if, after being struck by that attack, he can no longer give the Council what they want." Izumo whispered to his friend.
Kotetsu shook his head and turned his gaze back to his friend so the Uchiha wouldn't get suspicious. "I'm not sure. If he's incapable of birthing any heirs now, the Council will be furious. They'd most likely demand Naruto's head on a stake if that was the case." As Izumo agreed with his assessment of the situation, they returned their focus to young Naruto.
"Sakura and I are getting along a lot better now too. We talked for a while, and we even trained together under Kakashi-sensei's guidance! I showed Kaka-sensei a lot of what I could do, and even introduced him to Katsuo and Chikao. You guys remember them, right?" Seeing his friends nod, Naruto continued on. "Good. It wasn't long after that that I met Haku-kun."
At this point, Naruto called Haku over and grinned as he joined the blonde at his side. "See? This was Haku's rabbit, but now it's mine. Isn't that right wittle Cushy-Wushy?" The whiskered boy brought the rabbit up to his cheek and nuzzled him for a while.
Haku sighed and nodded his head slowly. "It's true. We've agreed to a 'joint custody' of sorts, but 'Cushy' will be living with Naruto-chan from now on. I…don't really mind, but it was certainly unexpected."
Izumo and Kotetsu watched the pretty boy shrug his shoulders before chuckling at the boy's misfortune. "Yes, well…Naruto-kun's an odd one. He's a good kid, and smart too, but damn if he isn't a random and unpredictable little bastard."
Izumo nodded at that and chuckled before quickly raising his hands in a placating manner. "We don't mean that in an offensive way. We oftentimes joke with Naruto-kun and he doesn't take offense to it any. We just laugh about it together. You'd be amazed at some of the pranks he's pulled in the village. Holy crap is he a damn genius!"
As the chunin laughed together, continuing to regale him with tales of Naruto's pranks, Haku couldn't help but glance sideways at his girlfriend, still in the guise of 'Naruto' as he was still forced to be. Just what have I gotten myself into by getting with you Naruki-chan?
After a time, Naruto stopped nuzzling Cushy and smiled brightly at his friends. "Anyways, I interrogated Haku-kun in the forest because I recognized him as Zabuza-san's apprentice or ally or whatever. I sensed him earlier in the battle with Zabuza, sooo…it wasn't hard to figure it out."
Shrugging his shoulders at that, the young blonde continued on. "Long story short, we put a stop to Gato and his men, saved Wave, all that good stuff. But…" Looking down, the whiskered blonde closed his eyes and shook his head for a moment. "I experienced my first kills on that mission. Haku and Zabuza joined our side and agreed to join Konoha…but…I couldn't let Gato's men live to hurt the people of Wave anymore. They were horrible people…"
Izumo and Kotetsu smiled sadly at their friend before moving around their desk and hugging him close, being careful not to squash the bunny rabbit. "We're sorry Naruto-kun. It must have been hard on you, but you need to remember you did a good thing, okay?"
Kotetsu nodded and decided to throw in his two cents as well. "It may sound awful saying this, but it's a good thing you got this out of the way early. I could try to explain what I mean by that, but…I'm sure you'll understand what I mean with time." Sighing to himself, the kind chunin patted his friend on the shoulder and smiled brighter. "No matter what, just know we're here for you, okay Naruto-kun?"
Naruto smiled and nodded slowly at his friends. "You know what? I love you guys. You're like big onii-chans to me! Just wish we could spend more time together. You're always busy!"
The two chunin nodded and shared a laugh at that before Naruto spoke up again as he slipped Cushy away into his backpack once more. "Oooo, guess what you two! Haku and I are a couple!" The Eternal Chunin's eyes looked like they would pop out of their sockets they had gone so wide in such a short amount of time!
"W-What?! I wasn't expecting that. Are you serious Naruto-kun?!" Kotetsu asked in shock while Izumo just nodded, wanting to know if he had just heard that right.
Haku was blushing furiously at this point as he slowly nodded his head. "I-It's true. It just kinda…happened." The boy explained with a shrug of his shoulders. Soon enough, Naruto turned to Haku and hugged him close before kissing him on the lips sweetly for just a moment.
Izumo blinked a couple of times before smiling at his younger brother figured and ruffling his hair a bit. "Well, I can't say I expected something like this, but I'm happy for you Naruto-kun. I'm sure Kotetsu is too. I'm sure you'll find some people in the village that choose to criticize you and say some rude crap, but we support you."
Kotetsu nodded at that and smiled brightly at his young friend. "Enough about all of this though. You should go and report to Hokage-sama. I'm sure he'll want to know the results of your mission. He'll also want to meet these two so he can decide for himself what to do with them. Take care."
Naruto and Haku nodded as they said their good-byes before turning and following the others towards the Hokage Tower. It wasn't long before Sasuke decided to speak up, clearly irritated at all the touchy-feely crap Naruto and Haku had been pulling since they left Wave. "Are you two ever going to stop that crap? It's seriously getting on my nerves." The Uchiha's answer came in the form of two bright grins. Shaking his head at that, the Uchiha smacked his face. "Ugh. I thought not."
Moments Later – Hokage's Office
Team 7 and their guests were currently standing across from the Sandaime, waiting for permission to speak. When it was finally given to them, Kakashi stepped forward and bowed his head for a moment before he began. "Team 7 reporting back from our mission Hokage-sama. Things went well, but there were some minor, er…'complications', so to speak."
The Sandaime rubbed his brow for a moment before he glanced to Naruto. "Kakashi-san, do explain. Does this have anything to do with your two guests? Did Naruto-kun do anything…weird?"
The silver-haired jonin sweat dropped at that before composing himself and beginning his explanation. "It turned out that Tazuna-san lied to us about the specifics of the mission. Gato was behind all the problems in Wave, and he had hired some shinobi and a large group of mercenaries to exert his control over the country."
Hiruzen Sarutobi looked to Zabuza and Haku at this point and glanced back at Kakashi Hatake. "I assume these two were some of the enemies you had to face?"
The Sharingan-wielding Kakashi nodded. "That is correct. The first opponents we encountered were the Demon Brothers. They were easily dispatched and proved absolutely no threat to our team. That was when we first learned the truth from Tazuna-san, our client. Despite being lied to and the mission easily being bumped up to a B- or A-rank at that point, we chose to continue with the mission. There was no way we could leave the people of Wave to suffer at the hands of such a tyrant."
The elderly Hokage nodded slowly before looking at the three genin in the room. Smiling at each of them, he nodded his approval at them before returning his gaze to Kakashi Hatake. "I do not fault you for your decision Team 7. As far as I'm concerned, you four made the right choice. Now, please continue."
The jonin sensei of Team 7 nodded in response and chose to continue on. "Shortly after arriving in Wave, Naruto kind of…caught a rabbit belonging to Haku-kun there, Zabuza Momochi's apprentice."
Naruto interrupted at this point and grinned happily as he showed the Hokage his new pet, Cushy. "See?! Isn't Cushy awesome Jiji?! Oooo, but shortly after my precious new pet came to me, Zabuza-san showed up and attacked us. He tried to intimidate us and threatened to kill Tazuna-san, but I nailed him with my Crotch-Seeker and he had to run away."
Zabuza grimaced at that and a hand went to his crotch unconsciously, still remembering the pain he suffered that day. Kakashi glanced to him and gave a knowing nod of his head, showing that he could feel the man's pain.
Hiruzen frowned at this, but nodded his head. "It's…an odd tactic, but a powerful one. Good job protecting your client Naruto-kun. You did well." Even if no man should have to suffer that kind of pain, I can't fault Naruki-chan for using that particular tactic. Not after working so hard to develop that technique, and especially not after all she's been through.
Kakashi chose to continue from that point. "Upon arriving at Tazuna-san's house…Naruto-kun, erm…let's call it an accident for now…he 'accidentally' struck both Tazuna's grandson and Sasuke-kun with the Crotch-Seeker. But…at least Sakura and Naruto's friendship strengthened…somehow."
Hiruzen grimaced as he thought about the possible repercussions of Naruto's attack on Sasuke's genitals, but chose not to comment on it or think about it for the time being. Instead, he urged Hatake to continue on.
Sighing, glad that the Hokage wasn't going to comment on Naruto's actions, the jonin sensei continued his explanation of the mission. "I proceeded to train Naruto and Sakura until Sasuke was able to join us for our training sessions. I…wasn't aware that Naruto knew so much already. I didn't even know he had signed the Monkey Contract. But, that's not really important to the mission details, so I'll forget about that for now."
Hiruzen quirked a brow, but chose to ignore the comments for now. Instead, the Sandaime listened as Kakashi Hatake continued on. "I'm not sure exactly when it happened, but Naruto-kun managed to catch Haku-kun off guard and interrogated him. He got plenty of useful information, and even managed to persuade Haku-kun and Zabuza-san to join Konoha. The last thing I can think of to mention is the fact that Gato showed up on the bridge and Zabuza, myself, and Naruto-kun dealt with them. Unfortunately, or fortunately, depending on how you look at it, Naruto-kun had to experience his first kills during that fight."
The Sandaime looked to Naruto at this point and frowned as he walked around the desk and over to the blonde boy. Kneeling down, he wrapped his grandson figure into a hug and patted his back. "Are you okay Naruto-kun?"
Naruto nodded slowly and hugged his Jiji tight. "I'm okay. Haku-kun helped me, and, with some time to think on it, I started feeling better. So…yeah, I'm okay now Jiji."
The Hokage moved back and smiled as he looked into the whiskered boy's eyes. "I'm glad to hear that. I had hoped you wouldn't have had to do that for some time, but it's good to hear you've recovered from that experience."
Nodding at that, Hiruzen Sarutobi looked to Haku and Zabuza at this point. "So, you two wish to join Konoha?" Seeing them nod, the Hokage nodded slowly before moving back to his desk and withdrawing his pipe from one of his drawers. Filling it and lighting it, he took a few puffs before releasing a slow breath. "Naruto-kun, Kakashi-san, do you trust them not to cause any trouble or betray the village?"
Kakashi nodded. "I have had time to speak with the both of them, and I found Zabuza-san to be a rather good man. He is highly skilled, and I would even recommend him for jonin status if you were to permit him to join our village. Haku-kun is easily high-chunin based on what I've seen of his skills. They are both good people and I stand by my student's decision to bring them here."
Naruto nodded happily and hugged Cushy close again. "Yeppers Jiji! I trust the both of them, and I think they'd get along really well here in the village. Haku's even become my boyfriend, so you'd better say yes!"
Hiruzen Sarutobi's eyes widened and he began choking on his tobacco. Spinning around quickly, he looked hard at Naruto and Haku. Seeing the two of them nod slowly, clearly understanding exactly what his eyes were asking, Hiruzen Sarutobi sighed to himself and nodded in response before turning to the rest of Team 7. "You four will receive the proper pay for an A-rank mission. Great job on your mission. Speak with my secretary about your pay. I need to speak with Naruto-kun, Haku-kun, and Zabuza-san privately now."
The members of Team 7 raised their eyebrows, clearly curious about what he had to speak with those three about in private. When the Hokage glared their way, the three quickly left the room, leaving those four alone in the room. As soon as they were gone, Hiruzen performed the necessary hand seals to activate the privacy seal in the room.
Taking his seat behind his desk, the Hokage rubbed his brow again before looking to Naruto. "It's clear to me that Haku-kun already knows the truth, but does Zabuza-san know?"
Naruki shook her head before glancing up at Zabuza. "No, not yet Jiji. Should I tell him?" Seeing the Sandaime nod, Naruki handed Cushy to Haku and reached up, unclasping the necklace from around her neck. Taking it gently into her hands, Naruki let the genjutsu drop before turning to look into Zabuza's eyes. "This…is me Zabuza-san."
The Demon of the Hidden Mist's eyes widened considerably and he began to stammer for a time, trying to find the right words for what he wanted to say. Eventually, he finally just settled on something. "Holy fucking shit! It all makes sense now! Haku-kun, you bagged yourself a little hottie! Wait…you knew this entire time?!"
The other three sweat dropped as Zabuza rambled on, spouting out everything that was going through his head at the moment. When he finally quieted down, Haku nodded slowly. "Y-Yes Zabuza-sama. Naruki-chan asked me not to tell you or anyone else the truth. I'm so sorry."
The swordsman shook his head and smiled down at his apprentice. "No, don't be. I'm not upset with you Haku. I'm actually quite happy for you. Now, could someone please explain this to me?"
Hiruzen Sarutobi nodded and motioned for the three to sit down. When they did, he finally began to speak. "It's a secret I have kept since Naruki's birth. On the night of Naruki's birth, the Kyuubi no Yoko attacked the village. The Yondaime, Minato Namikaze, could not kill the bijuu, so he did the best thing he could at the time and sealed it inside a newborn child." Seeing the look of realization dawning on Zabuza's face, the Sandaime nodded slowly. "Yes, that child was Naruki-chan. I tried to explain the situation to the villagers and help them realize that Minato-kun wanted the child to be treated as a hero…unfortunately this plan backfired."
Sighing heavily to himself, the Sandaime Hokage shook his head and took a few more puffs on his pipe before speaking again. "I ordered the Council to keep everything a secret, fearing that their reaction would plague the minds of the villagers. Unfortunately…the truth about Naruki spread throughout the village like wildfire. In order to protect Naruki, I used an artifact, that necklace, to hide her true gender."
Seeing the confusion on Zabuza's face, Hiruzen Sarutobi continued to explain. "Jinchuriki are treated cruelly almost everywhere. They are considered weapons and/or monsters in most places and most are treated with little to no respect at all. In this village, they oftentimes tried to kill Naruki-chan." Sighing heavily, the Hokage lowered his head and frowned sadly. "What do you think would have happened as Naruki-chan grew older?"
Zabuza took a moment to think before he finally spoke up. "Well, considering how volatile the situation seems to be regarding the kid, rape is an obvious answer. If they couldn't kill Naruki, they could at the very least break her. Crush her spirit, make her suffer…they would have done everything in their power to make her like a fucking zombie. It would've been harder for her to gain any respect, seeing as kunoichi oftentimes aren't treated with the same kind of respect male shinobi are. It's a sexist issue, and I'm sure some people don't even realize they're acting that way, but that's how it works."
The Sandaime nodded his head and smiled at Zabuza. "It's as you said. There are numerous reasons, but it really was for the best. Given a little more time, I'm sure Naruki-chan will be able to reveal her true gender and not have to risk anything because of it. However, until then…"
Naruki sighed at this point and spoke up. "I have to continue pretending to be a guy. I don't like it, but I don't really have much of a choice. I want to show who I really am, to be able to go shopping with Yugao-onee-chan for certain, erm…'essentials' without getting such funny looks from people. Heck, now that I've got a sweetie boyfriend, I would love to walk through the street, holding his hand and even showing him off to people I know. 'This is my honey-bunny. Don't we look cute together?!' and…well…you get the picture."
The Hokage chuckled softly at that and nodded his head. "I understand Naruki-chan. I'll make you a deal, okay? The Chunin Exams are coming up in a few months. If you can make Chunin in those exams, you can reveal your true gender. Deal?"
Naruki grinned and nodded her head. She was very happy and put her fist out to her Jiji. When they fist bumped, she giggled. "Deal Jiji! I'll definitely make chunin, just watch me!"
The Sandaime grinned at that and nodded happily. "I'll hold you to that promise Naruki-chan. Now..." Turning his gaze to Haku and Zabuza, the Hokage frowned and nodded his head slowly. "Zabuza, if I accept you into the village and make you a jonin, I have a request you will have to agree to. Is this understood?"
The swordsman nodded. "Of course Hokage-dono. What is this request of yours?"
Hiruzen Sarutobi smiled and waved his hand towards Naruki. "You have to agree to become Naruki's guardian. Adopt her or not, that is up to you. Just look after her and protect her. Do we have an agreement?"
Zabuza's eyebrow twitched as he turned his gaze on Naruki. "I'll admit that I'm a little hesitant, especially after being a victim of her Crotch-Seeker. Still, she's a good kid and she gets along well with Haku." Smiling, the Demon of the Hidden Mist turned to the Hokage and nodded his head. "I agree to those conditions. And, if you have the forms, I think I would like to officially adopt Naruki. But from what I've heard about her living conditions, I think you're going to have to help us arrange some new living arrangements for us. Can you agree to that Hokage-sama?"
The elderly man nodded and chuckled to himself. "Of course Zabuza-san." Digging through his desk, the Hokage found what he was looking for and pulled out the necessary forms for Zabuza to fill out. "I'll arrange a good place for you three to move into. If you would, please hand over your hitai-ate and I'll hand you the proper replacements. You'll have to return later to pick up your flak jackets."
Zabuza nodded and handed over his hitai-ate before he began filling out the forms. Haku handed his over as well before looking into the Hokage's eyes. "Does this mean you truly accept us Hokage-sama?"
Hiruzen Sarutobi nodded his head and smiled kindly at the boy. "I do. I trust in Naruki's judgment, and I shall place my trust in you as well. But, I do have a request of you as well." Seeing the boy nod slowly, clearly nervous about whatever it was that he would request of the ice-user, the Sandaime chuckled to himself. "Be good to Naruki and don't break her heart. She has a very protective onee-chan after all."
Haku smiled at that and quickly nodded in agreement. "I wouldn't dream of it. I like Naruki-chan a lot. We are similar in a way, and I feel really close to her. Though, I must ask something." Seeing the Hokage raise a brow at that, the ice-user gave him a nervous smile. "Is it, um…alright for us to be seen holding hands and, you know…k-kissing in public? She'll have the genjutsu active, and I'm not sure how you would feel about that, so I just have to ask."
Hiruzen Sarutobi looked to Zabuza, who simply nodded that they had already been doing that enough as is, before he looked back to the younglings. "I don't see a problem with it. If anyone gives you any problems, go ahead and let me know. I can always assign Yugao to follow you two. She is rather fond of Naruki-chan, so I doubt she'd take too kindly to any of the villagers harassing the two of you."
Naruki giggled at that and nodded to herself. "I think that sounds like a wonderful idea. I don't want anyone trying to pick on Haku-kun while I'm with him."
Smirking to himself, the old man nodded his head and glanced towards Yugao's position in the room. She was naturally the only ANBU in the room, seeing as she was the only other person in the village of Konohagakure that knew the truth about Naruki. As she appeared before her Hokage, kneeling down and bowing her head to him, Hiruzen grinned. "Yugao-san, would you perhaps be willing to accept a new assignment? Another member of ANBU can guard me in your stead."
The lovely violet-haired woman nodded her head and slowly withdrew her mask. "I will gladly take on this assignment Hokage-sama. I won't let anyone pick on my little sister."
The Sandaime smiled at that and nodded his head as he slid the new hitai-ate across his desk for Zabuza and Haku to take. "Good. You are all dismissed then. Do take care. I will send for you later as soon as I have set up your new house. In the meantime, feel free to have a look around the village and become acquainted with your new home." After a moment, an idea came to the old man and he began chuckling to himself. This chuckling caused his four guests to sweat drop nervously.
"Umm…Hokage-sama, why are you laughing?" Yugao asked, clearly worried not only for the Hokage, but for herself and the others in the room as well.
Coughing to compose himself once more, Hiruzen waved his hand and smiled at the four of them. "Oh, it's nothing. I just thought of something is all." Taking the forms from Zabuza, Hiruzen Sarutobi looked them over carefully and nodded. "Everything looks to be in order. I will take care of these in a bit. Take care you four and enjoy."
The young blonde hooked her necklace back in place and frowned a moment as the genjutsu sprung up again. Shrugging to herself, Naruki left the office with her companions. Once they were gone, the Hokage grinned and rubbed his hands together excitedly. "Oh Yugao-chan, you're going to hate me for this, but I can't resist. This is going to be so much fun! I can't wait to see how you react to what I have in store for you."
Later that night
Naruki had spent most of the time given to them by showing her new dad and boyfriend around the village to all her favorite spots. The young blonde had, of course, led them to Ichiraku Ramen at one point, where they all ate together happily. Of course, Zabuza Momochi quickly learned just how much ramen Naruki could consume and quickly decided that he would have to limit her ramen consumption somehow. Little did he know just how healthy her diet actually was.
Truthfully, the young blonde loved fruits and vegetables and loved a good salad. She also ate meat and loved to eat BBQ when she could. Then there was cereal, bread, and a variety of other foodstuffs that she ate. Of course, the reason she had even come to try all of this other food was because her Jiji and onee-chan had forced her to begin eating more than just ramen. After all, they wanted her to be a healthy and strong young woman!
After a few hours, the Hokage had finally sent for them. As their guide led them towards the location the Sandaime had requested they meet him at, the man informed them that the adoption had gone through and was now official. This news pleased the four following him, and Zabuza patted his new daughter atop her head shortly after receiving the news.
It didn't take much longer for the guide to lead them to what they assumed to be their new home. Standing just outside the house was the Sandaime, and he had in his hands two flak jackets. The guide quickly approached the Hokage with the four ninja in tow. He bowed to the Sandaime, said that he had brought them as requested, and was soon dismissed.
"It is good to see you again. Zabuza Momochi, Haku Yuki, these are your new flak jackets." Zabuza looked at the jonin flak jacket given to him and decided he would try it on later. Haku was given a chunin flak jacket and quickly tried it on with a smile. It fit perfectly and he thanked the Hokage.
Seeing that they were satisfied with their new gear, the Hokage proceeded to open the front door and led the group inside. "Naruki-chan, I have already moved all of your things from your apartment to this house. Your room is upstairs on the left. There are three more bedrooms upstairs as well, one for each of you."
At this, Yugao blinked a couple of times before she just had to ask. "Um, Hokage-sama? You can't mean me as well…right?"
Hiruzen began to chuckle again as he turned to the violet-haired woman. "Oh yes. I didn't tell you before, did I? I decided to have your belongings moved into this new house as well. You will be living with Naruki-chan from now on. Congratulations."
The ANBU woman's eyes widened considerably and she pointed her finger at him accusingly. "So that's why you were giggling earlier! You should've just told me Hokage-sama! If you wanted me to live with Naruki-chan, you should've just said so. This isn't funny."
Zabuza was snickering in the background. "Oh yes it is. Old man, you've got a great sense of humor. I can tell I'm going to like you a lot."
At this, Yugao turned a sharp glare on Zabuza and pointed her sword at his genitals. "Tell me Zabuza-san, would you like to keep your privates intact? If you do, I suggest you shut up."
Haku and the others sweat dropped as Zabuza quickly apologized to the woman. Holy shit this woman is scary! I'm going to have to be reallllly careful about what I say around her if I don't want to lose my precious manhood. The swordsman thought to himself, very wary of the woman near him now.
"Ahem." The old man coughed into his hand to get everyone's attention once again. "Anyways, I have filled the house with the essentials. There's food and drink in the kitchen, bathroom essentials in the three bathrooms located throughout the house, beds, etc. Take the time to get accustomed to your new home and get some rest when you're ready. Naruki-chan, I have instructed Kakashi Hatake to up the training for you and your team starting tomorrow. Be sure to get plenty of rest and eat well, because you are going to be busy. Hatake-san will make sure you three are ready for the Chunin Exams, I guarantee it." Seeing Naruki nod, the Sandaime smiled at her and pulled her into a hug before leaving to return to work.
Two months later – Day before the Chunin Exams begin
Things had been going surprisingly well for the family of four. Zabuza had grown quite accustomed to being a parent to both Haku and Naruki. In fact, the swordsman was really quite happy and he trained them both when they had the time to do so. Naruki was really happy as well, considering the fact that she had finally been adopted by somebody. Between having a wonderful boyfriend, father, and sister, things were great!
Haku had grown accustomed to his duties as a chunin and had become fast friends with Izumo and Kotetsu due to their time on guard duty together. Unlike them, the ice-user didn't have to do that too often, but it was still an enjoyable experience for the boy. The young man also highly enjoyed his dates with Naruki, even though she had to join him in the guise of Naruto. Oddly enough, she and 'Naruto' had their own unique fan club consisting of nothing but young girls and, even stranger than the fan club itself, married women! The two of them really weren't quite sure what the heck to make of that, but they weren't complaining.
Yugao had to explain to her boyfriend, Hayate Gecko, about her new living conditions a few days after moving in with Zabuza and his family. Naturally, Hayate wasn't too pleased with this revelation, but he understood and didn't voice his worries to her. Things were still great between the happy couple even now. However, Yugao did choose to leave the ranks of ANBU and became just a regular jonin. She wanted more time with Naruki and generally just enjoyed living a 'normal life' with her new family. It felt really good to her, and almost natural as well.
True to Hiruzen Sarutobi's word, Kakashi had indeed upped his training regimen for the genin of Team 7. He had been training the three of them incredibly hard in preparation for the Chunin Exams, but they had quickly taken to the new regimen and he truly felt that they were now ready to dominate in the Exams. In fact, earlier this very day, the jonin sensei of Team 7 had given to them their registration forms and informed them of what to expect tomorrow.
At the moment, Naruto was walking alongside Sakura, the two of them lost in conversation. They were talking about a variety of things ranging from the Chunin Exams starting tomorrow to Naruto's relationship with Haku. However, their peace was not to last as they soon heard a commotion coming from the nearby alleyway.
Quickly rushing down the alley, Naruto and Sakura spotted two strangers and a group of young children, one of which was being held by his throat by the ninja in black. While Sakura shouted at the genin in black, Naruto brought a couple of fingers to his lips and whistled loudly. Soon enough, Chikao leapt into action and scratched up the young man's face, forcing him to release the young boy.
As the young boy and his companions rushed behind Naruto and his companion, Chikao hurried over to Naruto's side. Upon recognizing the children that he had just rescued, Naruto frowned and turned his gaze back to the young man clad in black. "Konohamaru, Moegi, Udon, are you three okay?"
"We're fine. Thank you very much for saving us Boss." Moegi said, very glad that Naruto had shown up when he did.
Nodding his head, the blonde narrowed his eyes and took a step towards the young man in black and the blonde girl next to him. "I'll just go ahead and assume you two are here for the Chunin Exams and that's your friend in the tree over there." Nodding his head towards the tree, Naruto watched as the two of them gazed towards their teammate and began to panic. With a shrug of his shoulders, the whiskered blonde continued speaking. "You probably don't even realize this, but this is the Hokage's grandson you were trying to strangle to death just now."
The girl quickly turned her gaze back to Naruto and went wide-eyed. "Shit! Kankuro you idiot! What the hell are you trying to do you dumbass?!" The kunoichi yelled as she bashed her teammate over the head with her fist.
As the black clad young man grumbled in annoyance at that, he turned his attention back to Naruto. "I'm not even sure who the hell you are, but that hurt."
Naruto shrugged his shoulders before watching as the redhead disappeared and reappeared in front of his teammates. Before he could even say anything to his teammates, the whiskered blonde rushed forward and got right up in Gaara's face. "Hi hi!"
Gaara quirked an eyebrow, clearly having not expected that from this person who had just a moment ago been quite serious and lecturing his teammates. Behind him, Temari and Kankuro went wide-eyed and expected Gaara's sand to attack the blonde boy. However, they were shocked even more when the sand remained still.
Temari stepped around to the redhead's side and stared curiously at Naruto. "Who the heck are you Whiskers? Or…what are you?"
Naruto grinned at the blonde and quickly shook her hand. "I'm Naruto Uzumaki and I'm just a friendly genin of Konohagakure." Leaning in close, he whispered in Temari's ear. "I'm also a real badass I'll have you know."
The Suna kunoichi blinked and took a step back, clearly having not expected the boy to get that close. "Umm…okay then. Well I'm Temari and it's nice to meet you Naruto Uzumaki." Bowing her head slightly, the Suna genin turned to her teammate Kankuro and scowled at him. "Come on Kankuro, introduce yourself!"
Kankuro stepped forward and glared at the whiskered blonde. "Fine. I'm Kankuro and I don't appreciate you sending your monkey to scratch my face like that."
Naruto laughed to himself before reaching forward and poking Kankuro's nose. "You're a clown boy with kitty ears! You should dress a bit more appropriately if you're going to be a clown, though. Hmmm, you should also look into getting a red button nose. Ooo, can you do any awesome tricks Mr. Clown?!"
As Kankuro went red in the face from anger and went to retort, Temari began to laugh so hard she doubled over in pain. Turning a glare on her, the young man turned away and huffed angrily. "Damn brat."
At this point, Gaara finally spoke up, ignoring his teammates. "You are interesting Naruto Uzumaki. I am Gaara and Mother is not quite sure what to make of you. She craves your blood, and yet, she thinks you're insane. It's…odd."
Naruto nodded at that and closed his eyes for a moment. "Yep, I get that a lot. The insane part I mean, not the 'I'll have your blooood' bit. Still, I guess I should be flattered, huh?" Smirking, the whiskered blonde leaned in close and began to whisper into Gaara's ear. "It's nice to meet someone like me. How does it feel to meet another of your kind, Mr. Funny Jinchuriki?"
Gaara's eyes widened for just a moment before he began to speak in a hushed whisper as well. "So you really are a Jinchuriki. I have to admit, I didn't expect a fellow Jinchuriki to be quite so...unique. But, there is something I have noticed about you Naruto Uzumaki: you seem almost…happy. Explain to me why this is."
The blonde Jinchuriki grinned and placed a hand on Gaara's shoulder, the Suna genin's sand STILL not reacting to his close presence. "It's pretty much because I've got family and friends here. Sure, life hasn't always been easy here and the villagers have mostly treated me like shit, but it got better with time. From the sound of it, you're pretty unhappy, huh? I'd ask if you wanted to sit down with me somewhere and talk about it, but we're both kinda busy, what with the Chunin Exams starting tomorrow, huh?"
The redheaded Jinchuriki nodded slowly before replying in a surprisingly soft tone of voice, one that wasn't full of malice. "I'll say it again Naruto Uzumaki, you are interesting. You are correct though, we cannot take much more time to talk. And yes…life hasn't been good in my village. But…I do have Mother and she protects me."
Naruto Uzumaki nodded slowly before poking Gaara in the nose and giggling. "You're funny Gaara. It's been nice meeting you. If you need a friend, I'll gladly be one for you. You might want to stop the 'Mother wants your bloooood' thingy though, because that can be kinda creepy. It really puts people off. Well…most people I suppose. I just think it's funny." Giggling to himself, Naruto wrapped his arms around his fellow Jinchuriki and hugged him for a moment before finally stepping back. "Take care Gaara-kun. You as well Clownie-chan and Temari-chan! Good luck in the Exams tomorrow!"
The Suna genin couldn't figure out just what to make of the odd genin they had just met. Kankuro didn't like him one bit, Temari thought he was kind of funny, but in a good way, and Gaara was curious to learn more about him. In fact, as he walked off with his team, Gaara was smiling! Needless to say, that really creeped his teammates out.
As Naruto turned back to face Sakura, he saw the looks his friends had and shrugged. "What?" When they only shook their heads, amused expressions on their faces, the blonde grinned and decided to continue his walk with Sakura and the Konohamaru Corps.
The Next Day – Academy
As Team 7 entered the academy and climbed to the second floor, they could see quite the crowd outside one of the rooms. Blinking to himself, Naruto looked at his teammates and leaned in close, whispering to them. "Are they all just stupid or something? How come they can't see through such a simple genjutsu?"
Sakura shrugged her shoulders and was about to suggest that they just move on, but once again Sasuke's ego decided to rear its ugly head. Walking towards the crowd, he was about to say something when a genin clad in a disturbing green spandex outfit was sent crashing backwards onto the ground. As he stood up and brushed himself off, the boy soon turned to Team 7 and looked them over for a moment before his eyes landed on Sakura.
Before he could even say anything, Naruto rushed forward and immediately gripped the boy's eyebrows. "This is awesome! How can your eyebrows be so bushy?! They feel kinda fuzzy too. I thought maybe they were fake, but…but…wheeee!" Yanking on them a bit, Naruto soon released them and hugged the boy tight. "You've even got a nifty outfit! What's your name Mister Fuzzy Brows?"
The boy soon freed himself from Naruto's grasp and began to rub his eyebrows, that part of his head feeling rather sore at the moment. "U-Um, I'm Rock Lee. And you are?"
The blonde grinned and pounded his chest. "I'm Naruto Uzumaki Mister Fuzzy Brows! That's Sakura-chan and that there is Mister Grumpy Super Ego Pants!"
Rock Lee and Sakura began to chuckle at the nickname the blonde had suddenly given to Sasuke while the Uchiha began to snarl angrily. Nodding his head, Lee patted Naruto on the shoulder and smiled brightly. "Well, it certainly is nice to meet such a youthful young person such as yourself Naruto-kun! I hope we can be good friends and I wish you the best of luck in the Exams."
Sasuke decided to pipe in at this point. "Screw this. Naruto, Sakura, let's just go. I don't even feel like setting these idiots straight anymore." And with that, the raven-haired young man set off to climb the stairs up to the third floor.
Lee shrugged his shoulders and looked Naruto in the eyes. "Take care and be careful Naruto-kun, there are some strong opponents here. One of them happens to be my own teammate, Neji-kun." Oddly enough, Lee never even bothered to hit on Sakura or challenge Sasuke, the situation that had just taken place had successfully distracted him from those particular goals.
As they approached Room 301 on the third floor, Team 7 spotted their sensei waiting for them. After a short conversation with their sensei, the three genin stepped into the room and glanced around at everyone. When they were blasted with a wave of killing intent by a bunch of the genin, Sasuke and Naruto simply smirked.
Waving to the lot of them, Naruto grinned. "Heyo! Nice to meet you all! I'm the badass that's gonna kick your asses! Good luck tryin' to stop me!"
At this, Sakura facepalmed and Sasuke found himself chuckling, clearly amused by the situation. Soon, Team 10 approached them, Ino immediately glomping onto the Uchiha while the others started up a conversation with Sakura and Naruto. "So Naruto, I hear you've been adopted and are, um…dating someone now. Err…congratulations?" Shikamaru said, clearly not sure what to say regarding what he had heard.
The blonde laughed to himself before nodding his head at the Nara boy. "Yeppers! My tou-san is awesome and I've got a wonderful boyfriend too. Sooo…I'm good!"
Ino found herself giggling as she was forced to finally release the Uchiha. "I heard! Congratulations Naruto!"
As Team 8 approached, Kiba couldn't help but shake his head at what he had heard. "I always knew you were strange Naruto, but I didn't know you were gay too. What happened? Finally figured out you couldn't get a girl, so you decided to start swinging for the same team?"
At this, Ino and Sakura both slugged Kiba and glared hard at him. "Hey! We think it's cute so you shut the hell up Mutt!"
Hinata looked down and remained quiet, clearly unable to say anything on the current topic. Shino was his usual self, remaining silent. He didn't feel like anything needed to be said.
As the group lost themselves in conversation, a silver-haired young man approached them. This genin wore glasses and looked kind of odd to Naruto, but he didn't voice that thought aloud. Instead, he listened as the boy spoke. Saying something about how they were attracting too much attention to themselves and how this was his seventh time taking the exams and so on, Naruto was barely listening to him.
What did catch the young blonde's attention was when Kabuto, as he said his name was, began revealing information on Rock Lee and Gaara from the Suna team. Moving forward, Naruto knelt down and grinned as he exclaimed, "Heeeey, those are my new friends! Cooool, you've got picture cards! Can I keep 'em?!" And without even waiting for an answer, Naruto took the cards and slipped them into one of his pockets, much to Kabuto's confusion and irritation.
When the young man began going on about the various teams that were taking part in these Exams, a team from Otogakure rushed him and went to attack, only for Naruto to suddenly appear in front of the mummy boy and grab his gauntlet. "Oooooo, this looks really neat too! Can I have it?!"
Eye widening at the speed the blonde boy had shown, Dosu quickly pulled his arm free and the three genin quickly stopped their attempted attack on Kabuto. "No you can't have it! What the hell is wrong with you?!" This kid kinda scares me. He moved so fast I didn't even see it!
Naruto grinned and patted the boy's shoulders. "I dunno. People just think I'm crazy, but I think I rock!"
Dosu nodded slowly before taking a step back. "I'll just go with what others say and agree that you're crazy. Now, let's leave it at that." Moving away from the clearly mentally disturbed boy, the Oto team returned to their seats right as a large man appeared at the front of the room.
"Alright maggots, sit down and shut up! You're…" Sadly, before the man could even finish speaking, Naruto was standing right in front of him and looking up into his eyes. "Um, what the hell do you want kid?"
"You look kinda awesome too! Wanna be friends?!" Naruto shouted, causing everyone in the room to sweat drop at his antics.
"Uhh…tell you what. If you pass this exam, I'll be your friend. Got it?" The man stated, obviously just trying to get the kid to back the hell off! When Naruto nodded and took his seat, the man continued. "Alright then. My name is Ibiki and I'm the proctor for your first exam. Before we begin, let me just welcome all of you. After all, you're about to enter true Hell."
Naruto bounced up and down in his seat at this point and giggled to himself. "That sounds like a lot of fun-fun!" Once again, nobody knew what the hell to think of the boy as they began to sweat drop.
This kid is going to be a handful. I see now why Hokage-sama warned me to be wary. Ibiki thought to himself as he began to go over the rules for the first exam.
Omake – The Yaoi Fan Club
Two weeks after their return to Konoha, Sakura had successfully recruited many of her girl friends to her cause and had managed to create what she referred to as the Yaoi Fan Club. They met at a different girl's house each week, oftentimes switching between Sakura's and Ino's houses, or even visiting the Hyuga clan compound, much to Hiashi's annoyance.
A full month had passed since Team 7 had returned to Konoha, and therefore it had been one week since the forming of the good fan club. They were currently having their first serious meeting.
"Alright, if you will look at the documents I have given you now, we can begin." The leader of the fan club stated. The pinkette, Sakura Haruno, was positively giddy to begin discussing the relationship between Naruto and Haku, and had proceeded to make many, many copies of the pictures she had taken thus far of the happy couple.
As the girls looked through the pictures and the read over a few sheets of paper that had been given to each of them, Sakura began to speak. "As you can see, we are here to discuss the relationship between one Naruto Uzumaki and his boyfriend, Haku Yuki. Based on what I have seen of them thus far, I have chosen to dub Haku as the 'seme' and Naruto-kun as the 'uke'. If you'll read the first paragraph on sheet 1, you will come to understand these terms in full detail."
Doing as instructed, the girls soon came to understand exactly what their leader meant by her weird terminology. Looking back into Sakura's eyes, the girls nodded in acceptance of her statement. "Ever since I saw the two of them together back in Wave, I haven't been able to help myself. This new side of me just came out, and I think this is just HOT! Not only are they really cute together, but it's so sexy to watch as well! But…I kind of got caught watching them at one point by some purple-haired psycho. She cut my camera in half and threatened to injure me if I kept stalking the two of them."
Ino nodded her head in understanding as she looked through the pictures and read over everything Sakura had written. "I can't wait to see this for myself! I understand what you mean, this is juicy stuff here! Who would've thought that Naruto could be so…so…damn this is a good picture! I have got to take this one home with me!" The Yamanaka exclaimed, clearly losing track of whatever it was they were trying to discuss.
Hinata Hyuga, sitting in the rightmost chair, had somehow pulled off a new expression none of the girls had seen before. She looked both depressed and, oddly, turned on at the same time. "I wish it was me he was holding like that. Oh…oh my…" Blushing furiously at a rather…intimate picture she had come across, Hinata began to giggle perversely until blood began dribbling from her nose. "I don't know how you managed to snap this picture Sakura-chan, but…ooooo…."
Seeing as the Hyuga girl had clearly lost the ability to formulate a complete sentence, Tenten decided it was her turn to speak. "I'm…not quite sure how you managed to drag me into this, considering I've never even met you before, but I'll admit that this is some wonderful stuff you've compiled Sakura." Taking some time to think, the weapons master started giggling perversely as she looked around at her fellow fan club members. "Ooooo, we have to take some of their stuff for the fan club! Maybe a shirt or a present one of them gives to the other…anything! Just knowing that it was touched by these two…ohhhhh…."
Sakura began to giggle to herself and nodded, gaining a bit of a nosebleed herself as she began to imagine some rather naughty images. "I wonder if they've done anything more yet."
Ino looked up at this point and nodded excitedly. "Oh Kami I hope so! Can you just imagine it?! Haku-kun on top, Naruto moaning beneath him….oh Kami-sama!" Soon enough, the platinum blonde girl passed out from all the blood rushing to her head, the images being too much for the girl to bear.
Sakura turned to Hinata at that point, who was starting to giggle more and more, louder and louder. "Oh Naruto-kun, even if it's not with me…ahhh…" And then she was out.
Tenten looked between the two unconscious girls before looking into Sakura's eyes. "So…when do we raid their home or follow them around the village, taking what we can?"
Sakura Haruno didn't even appear to hear Tenten speaking, as she was currently playing a rather romantic scene over and over again in her mind. When it finally got to the good part, she passed out as well, joining her friends in blissful sleep.
"I…guess that means we'll have to think on it." Tenten said aloud as she began to look through the pictures once more. "Oooo, this is a good one. I'm putting this one on my mirror!"
A/N: Okay, firstly, I'd like to apologize for taking so very long to get this chapter to you guys. If you've checked out some of my other fics and read some of the Author's Notes, you'll know why that is. *shrugs*
Second, the ending might seem kind of rushed to some of you, and it might have stopped off at a really bad spot, buuut...I didn't want to start the first exam just yet. The first and second exams should be taken care of in the next chapter, and it should get to the preliminary matches. I don't know if I'll start those or not though. Just need to wait and see. *nods*
Hopefully you all enjoyed this chapter and got some good laughs out of it. I also hope you enjoyed the omake at the end. I enjoyed writing this chapter a lot, and I think it turned out rather well. I even managed to throw in a flashback explaining how Hiruzen Sarutobi lost his nut!
Erm...yeah. Anyways. lol. In case you don't read some of my other fics, there is a new poll up on my profile for The Rise of Naruto Uzumaki-Namikaze, if you read that story. Feel free to check it out and vote if you haven't already done so. *nods*
As usual, review/comment, send a PM, do what you'd like. If you don't want to, that's coolio with me, just sayin' you're free to. lol. Chapter 5 is up next, so hopefully you're looking forward to it. Enjoy your day my readie-readers!