Well, it's the moment you've been waiting for; the Alchemy examination. Oh, and just a note, I'm really sorry if my story doesn't make much sense. This is just a result of what me and my friends discuss almost every afternoon over the phone or on AIM. Just give me some more time, and everything will be explained.

Chapter 8: The Alchemy Exam: Part One and Two

It was finally Saturday. The day of the big Alchemy exam. And, like before most tests, Kay was freaking out.

"What if I don't pass?" she panicked. "What if I didn't study enough?"

"Kaykay, you studied for what seemed like a whole month," Meg reassured her. "I think you're pretty well-prepared."

"Yeah, just keep calm," Al added, his arm wrapped snuggly around Kay's waist.

The brunette just sighed and looked out the train window. They were taking the MetroNorth to a military headquarters just outside of the state. Surprisingly now, they were being built all over the place, probably to get their hands on as many Alchemists as possible, despite the growing numbers of the few who not only couldn't perform Alchemy, but also couldn't believe in it. To many, it was still just a failed science of turning ordinary metals into gold from the times of ancient China.A mere topic to only be discussed within a history class.

"I wish Cris and Ed were coming," she complained. "Those two are, like, two of the best State Alchemists around, and I could use a few more pointers for-"

She immediately stopped when she felt a tap on her shoulder. Spinning around, she smiled when she saw her two friends standing in the middle of the aisles of train seats.

"How many pointers do you actually need?" Ed asked her, smirking.

"Well, speak of the devil. Hey, guys!...Wait a sec...why did you choose now to tap me on the shoulder and let me know you two were on the frickin' train?"

Cris laughed. "We wanted to see how pissed you'd get."

"I hate you two, so much."

Laughing some more, the couple then sat in the seats right next to Kay and Al. Elly and Meg were sitting in seats facing the four.

"Kay was just spazzing about making an idiot of herself during the Alchemy exam," Elly informed the two newcomers.

"Yeah, we know," Ed said. "She was spazzing more last night talking to Cris, and I had to hear the whole damn thing."

"Get over it, Elric," Cris snapped playfully at him, pushing him lightly. "You're just pissed because she took up more time with me on the phone than you had time with me at the moment to-"

"Alright, alright! I don't wanna hear it!" Meg held her hands over her ears.

"Sorry, Meghan." Cris then looked over at Kay and Al, who were snickering at the thoughts of things that she was going to tell them. She smirked evilly. "C'mon, don't tell me that you two still haven't done it yet."

"Cris, give it a rest," Al snapped. "We're not like you and my brother."

"Oh, I have a feeling you will be one day!"

"Yeah, if we're still together when we're older."

"God, you two are chickens!"

"Shut up, Cris."

"Don't start with me, pipsqueak."

Kay growled. "I'm not a pipsqueak!"

"Uh, yeah, you are. You're the shortest one here." Cris then looked down the walkway between the aisles at the sight of some screaming girls, then back at Kay. "Um, Kayla?"

"Yeah, Crystal?"

She pointed to her eyes' targets. "Do those four idiots belong to you?"

Kay instantly knew what her friend was talking about. She moaned and slumped down in her seat. "They didn't," she prayed. "I know they wouldn't."

Elly stood up and looked. "Uh, Kay, they would and they did."

"Damn stalkers!"

Working their way through the crowd were none other than--drumroll, please--...the Gorillaz! They also had succeeded into getting onto the train without the original four seeing them.

" 'Ey, everybody," 2D greeted them cheerfully. "Took long 'nough t' find ya."

"Yeah, I bet," Kay groaned. "Why do you guys follow me around everywhere?"

"I wanted t' stay at Kong," Murdoc defended himself, "but Mr. I-Wanna-See-Kayla-Love-B'fore-The-Alchemy-Exam and li'l Miss I-Wanna-Be-There-T'-Cheer-Kayla-San-On 'convinced' me otherwise."

"I just came 'cuz there was nothin' better to do, and 'cuz we wanted to be there to cheer you on," Russel added.

"Well,...thanks, I guess," Kay said. "But am I really that cool that you guys have to follow me around like little puppies-oh, crap!" She immediately clasped her hands over her mouth, because she knew what was going to follow...

"Oi, I luf' puppies," 2D said. "They're so cute!"

"Case closed, buddy," Al began. "You're girly."

"I am not!"

"Are too, face-ache," Murdoc said.

"Murdoc-san does have a point, you know," little Noodle agreed.

"I'm not girly; I'm jus' dif'rent!"

"You mean both!" Elly and Meg said in unison.

2D only pouted. "I 'ate ya all!"

"No, you don't, 'D," Kay said matter-of-factly.

"Wanna bet?"

"I'll give you fifteen minutes to take it back."

"Passengers, we are about to arrive at our first Connecticutt stop," the loudspeakers on the train rang out. "All passengers ready for this stop, please make you way towards the doors. We will be haulting momentarily."

"That's our stop," Al announced. "We better get up."

"Oh, god." Kay whined again, still feeling unprepared for the exam. "I know I'm gonna fail this-"

"Kay, shut up," everyone else told her. She instantly obeyed.

"I'm not going in there!" Kay screamed as Al tried to pull her into the building. "I'm still not ready!"

Al kept tugging harder and harder. "C'mon, kid. You'll be fine, for the hundredth time!"

"No, I won't!"

Elly sighed hopelessly. "Kay, me and Meg are taking it; you're taking it, too."

"But, I don't want to!"

"Kay, for the love of God, stop acting like a baby!" Ed yelled at the girl. "If I could do it, so can you."

"Dude, you're, like, the best Alchemist around for your age. This is way too much pressure on someone my age!"

"Okay," Al said, "that does it." In one fluid movement, he scooped Kay up in his arms and started to carry her into the building.

"Alphonse Elric, you put me down this instant!" she screamed, squirming as much as she could.

Al just ignored her and looked back at the others. "C'mon, guys. Um," he looked over at the four band members, "you guys cool with waiting?"

"We have all the time in the world," Noodle replied, fixing the collar on her denim jacket.

"Oh, really?" Murdoc raised an eyebrow at his guitarist. "Y'mean you 'ave all the time in the world. What 'bout the rest of-"

"I'm cool wif' it," 2D said.

"Me, too," Russel agreed. "I'm lookin' forward to seein' Kay's performance." This made the brunette whine like she was about to cry.

"Kay, cool it," Al told her, aggravated. "It won't be that bad."

"Well, I still don't want to do it."

"Then, why did you come all this way to take it?" another voice asked.

Everyone turned and saw none other than Mustang standing there, his regular cocky grin plastered on his face. And from his expression, he knew that Ed had expected him to come around anytime soon.

"Well, if it isn't Colonel Roy Mustang," the blonde Alchemist mocked him. "Finish putting up those 'Vote For Me' signs around the offices?"

"I'd be more discrete about those insults, Full Metal," Mustang said. "You know I don't like you, and I know you don't like me, but I seem to have more authoritive power over you at the moment."

"Oh, la-dee-da. What are you gonna do to me, blab about miniskirts until I uncontrollably bleed from the ears?" This insult managed to get a laugh out of everyone, but Mustang became cross.

"Very funny, Full Metal. Anyway," he looked over at Al, still holding Kay in his arms, "you might as well have yourgirlfriend and her friends come in, Alphonse; the test is beginning shortly."

"What part?" Kay asked him.

"Writing."

"Oh, that'll be easy. Oh, Al, put me down." Kay's boyfriend did as he was told.

"I hope my hand doesn't freeze up or anything,"she continued.

"I'll wait for you all inside." And with that, the Flame Alchemist entered the building, leaving the others outside, in shock that Kay was now completely cool with taking the exam.

"C'mon, guys," Meg said, walking up the last few steps towards the doors. "Let's go take that exam and get it over with."

"Right," Elly said, joining her friend.

"Hold on, I'm comin'," Kay added.

"Hey, Kayla-san?"

Kay turned around and looked at Noodle. "Yeah, Noods?"

"Good luck, and if you get nervous, just imagine Mustang in his underwear to take your mind off of the stress."

"Thanks for the suggestion, Noods, but I can't concentrate on a test with a sick stomach."

After entering the large hall that they were going to take the writing portion of the Alchemy exam in, Kay, Meg, and Elly were all separated among the other people taking the exam. To their surprise, more young people were even trying to pass, thinking that one day, they would have enough of what it would take to become the greatest State Alchemist around. That's when Lieutenant Hawkeye had walked over to the three and informed them that only one or two people at young ages like this would be admitted into the military. And, of course, Kay became even more nervous!

So far for her, the writing portion was rather easy. Only twice during the time period did her hand cramp up, and she tried her hardest not to ramble about anything other than the original topic being discussed, which was one of her bad habits. Maybe she had ADD or something...

Half way into it, she stole a glance at the huge clock on the wall. She had ten minutes left to spare, and she had finished, and by looking at Elly and Meg, who were sitting across the room,they were finished as well. Now, what to do with her spare time...what to do...

Finally, remembering the discussion she and the others had had with Mustang before the exam,she figured out what to do. Taking a piece of scrap paper that was next to her, she started to sketch out a chibi version of Mustang. In the drawing he was being struck by lightening, his eyes wide and looknig as if they would pop out of his sockets.

Meanwhile...

While the three girls were taking the test, Al, Ed, Cris, Murdoc, Noodle, 2D, and Russel were all outside the huge doors of the speech hall, either waiting patiently, or trying their hardest not to do something stupid to pass the time.

That is, until Ed thought of something extra-stupid to pass his time...

"Hey, Al," he said, trying to get his brother's attention.

Al turned and faced Ed. "Yeah?"

"I know something you don't know."

Being the curious person he was, Al had to ask, "What?"

"...You're not human."

Cris began to laugh. She'd known for quite a long time that Al was extremely gullible, no matter what the situation was.

And, sure enough, he fell for it.

"W-what do you mean, brother?" he started to mentally panic.

Now, everyone else was trying to contain their laughter. Ed was the only one who did the best; he was a pro at holding his emotions in.

Still, he continued, this time with a fake look of concern on his face. "Um, Alphonse, I'm sorry to tell you this, but,...you're an alien." Now, he felt he was going to explode anytime soon.

Al scoffed. "Yeah, right. Like I'm gonna believe that."

"Damn. Man, I thought it would work!"

"Brother, I'm not that gullible...Man, I wonder when Kay and the others are gonna be done."

"They have been in there for quite a while, kid," Russel agreed. "It must take a long time, that test."

Then, just as if on cue, the doors opened, and people started filing out, most of them whining about how sore their hands and wrists were. The last three people out were the ones they were waiting for.

"Finally!" Murdoc said with a sigh of relief. "What took ya all so bloody long?"

"Uh, the test?" Meg answered."What do you think we were doing in there, having a tea party?"

"Shut up."

"It was pretty easy, but it's a shame they wouldn't let us out until time was up," Elly said, stretching her arms."Reminds me of when I took the Biology Regents last year." (Author's Note:Just a little FYI, the Biology Regents are a state-wide test the takes place at the end of the year, to see how much you learned. I don't know if you took it, but my state makes this test an absolute necessity for you to move on to the next grade.)

"Yeah, except that test was easy," Meg agreed. "This one was a tad hard."

"Well, I'd be able to make a comparison between the two exams," Kay said, "if I was in Biology in the eighth grade like you two were."

"Don't feel bad, Kay," Cris said. "We're both in Biology, except you're the one in advanced."

"Yeah, that does a bit more for my self esteem. Thanks, Cris."

"No prob, shorty."

"Don't call me short!"

"Kay, you're acting like Ed," Meg pointed out.

"I don't care; I hate it when people call me short!"

"God, you're such a baby."

"I'm not a baby!"

"Kay, calm down," Al told her. "By the way, what time do you guys have to do the interview?"

As if I couldn't get any more nervous, Kay thought to herself. "Um, I think I have it in a half an hour, but Meg and Elly have it first."

"Yeah, ain't that your luck, you lucky bitch?" Elly groaned.

"Aw, is Ewwy upset about the test?" Kay started laughing.

The rocker girl stuck her tongue out at her friend. "Shut up. I suck at taking interviews in front of important people. I make a complete idiot of myself!"

"At least you can stay on topic. I start blabbing about other stuff if I can't master explaining the main topic."

"Well, we all know that, Kay," Cris laughed.

"Shut up, blondey!"

Twenty-eight minutes later...

"I hope she's okay in there," Meg said, worried about her friend that was now taking the interview. Guess who it was?...ELLY!

Kay was too busy playing her GameBoy to notice Meg's comment. "Yeah. Me, too, I guess."

The young Turkish girl (yes, she's Turkish) scoffed and looked at Kay with a questioning,"are-you-even-listening" look. "Kay, will you put the damn GameBoy down and listen to me for once?"

"Sounds like something my mother used to say to my father," Kay said, not taking her eyes off the small screen.

"Kayla-san, jump on that lever!" Noodle suddenly squeaked.

"I'm jumpin', I'm jumpin'!"

"Kay, it isyour turn."

"Who said we were playing in turns, Noods?"

"No, I mean that Elly-san had just stepped out. It is your turn to take the interview now."

Kay immediately switched the game off, and following that, went into a state of complete fear, anxiety, and hopelessness.

Now, she didn't know what she was going to do. Sure, the performance part was nerve-racking enough, but the interview? Holy hell, was she stressed!

"Okay." She stood up and made her way towards the doors, but quickly turned back and looked at her friends to tell them to wish her luck. Strangely, Al wasn't there!

"Um, where's Al?" she asked.

"Probably in the bathroom," Ed guessed, shrugging his shoulders. Truthfully, at the moment, he didn't really care where his younger brother was.

"Oh man! I wanted him to behere to wish me good luck."

"He'll be out here waiting for you when you come back out, and he'll be there for your performance outside on the field," said Cris. "Don't worry about it so much, Kay."

"Fine. All of you had better be prayin' for me then."

Murdoc cleared his throat loudly.

"Um, well, you put in a little word with Satan for me, 'k?"

"Can do," the bassist replied, smirking.

"See ya later, guys." Kay then proceeded to step into the room.

Inside, it was completely pitch-black, except for a bright light coming down from the ceiling on a thin chair right in the middle of the room. Kay noticed it had three legs on it, just like she had seen on the series. All she had to do was sit there and take the interview, and pray that she wouldn't fall off.

"Go ahead and take a seat," a familiar voice said.

Kay looked ahead into the darkness and nodded. She then proceeded towards the chair and easily sat down.

"Well, that was easy," she murmured to herself. "Good thing I didn't fall."

"Hi, Kayla! OW!"

Kay looked up. "Alphonse?"

"I thought I told you to keep your mouth shut if you wanted to be in here, Elric!" another voice snapped.

That has to be Mustang, Kay thought. But how the hell is Al in here?

"Okay, let's begin," the first voice said. "Name?"

"Kayla Hamilton, sir."

"...Okay. And, how old are you, Kayla?"

"Fourteen."

"Really? You look at least sixteen."

Here we go again! Kay laughed a bit. "Yeah, I get that a lot."

The voice laughed. "I'm sure you do. Now, what kind of Alchemy do you specialize in?"

"Um...fire and darkness, sir."

"...Interesting."

Well, this is boring, Kay mentally whined. How long is this gonna take?

"Okay, next question: why, exactly, do you wish to become a State Alchemist?"

After a minute of collecting her thoughts, Kay started to explain. "Because at least two months ago, my parents died. Or, rather, they were murdered. I heard that the military has some information that you can't acquire anywhere else, and that might help me in discovering what exactly happened to my parents."

"I see. I've heard all about your family tragedy. Continue."

Kay swallowed spit that was beginning toflood her mouth and continued. "I also want to be able to help prevent that from happening to any other person my age or younger, and to prove to some people who don't really believe in me that I'm actually more than I look like. I want to be able to say that I made a difference during my life, even if it's short, and to give my family a good name."

Mustang's voice scoffed. "Yeah, like I haven't heard that answer before."

"Colonel, be polite," the first voice snapped. It sounded way too familiar, but Kay couldn't really guess who it was. It would be easier if she could see the person.

"What? I'm just saying," Mustang continued.

"Amazing," Kay commented, smirking.

"What's amazing?" the colonel asked.

" 'Cuz, three billion sperm, and you're the one that actually got through!" She started to laugh, and apparently the familiar voice and Al's joined in as well. Mustang was apparently insulted, and was now starting to pray to God that she wouldn't get into the military.

"Okay, that was a bit rude," the firstperson said, clearing his throat, "though I will admit, it was rather funny. Now, Miss Hamilton, do you how you did on the written portion of the exam?"

"I thought it was a bit hard, but I got through it in time."

"I know. I saw you, and I saw those sketches you left near your seat. You're a pretty good artist for your age."

"Thank you, sir."

"However, being a good artist and being a comedian won't get you very far in the military, you understand that, right?"

"Right. I understand, sir."

"Great, just so we know we're on the right track."

"God, are they 'avin' a fuckin' tea party in there?" Murdoc complained.

"She has been in there for quite a long time," Noodle agreed. "Maybe they are discussing something rather important."

"Yeah, like what?" Ed asked. "Believe me, Noods, I took the exam and went through the interview, too, but it didn't take me that long to get out of there. And speaking of people not being here, where's Al?"

"Hell if we know," Elly replied. "You think he's in there with Kay?"

"Yeah, right. He's not that stupid to get himself into that kinda of trouble. I know he's a bit mischievous, but I don't think he'd make a fool of himself that much...or at least, I hope not."

"Ed, you probably jinxed it," Cris commented.

Finally, the doors opened, and Kay walked out to meet her impatient friends,...with none other than Al right behind her!

"Hey, guys," she greeted them. "Sorry it took so long; I apparently was recovering from a bit of shock."

"What do you mean, Kay?" Meg asked.

"Until a minute before I left the room, I didn't know the guy who was asking me all the questions was actually the Fuhrer! I was about to faint."

Her friend gasped. "You're kidding. The Fuhrer was giving us the interview?" Apparently, her friend was scared now, too, and looked like she was about to faint. Elly somehow didn't seem surprised at all.

"Who's the Fuhrer?" she asked.

Kay's jaw literally dropped. "You're kidding, right? The Fuhrer is the head honcho; he's in charge of the whole military."

"...oh. Okay, that says a lot."

"Yeah, I know."

"So, um, can we go out and wait on the field?" Meg asked, feeling a bit woozy. "I think I need some fresh air before I pass out."

"Calm down, Meggie. I'm the one who should be scared. He saw my sketches of Mustang, and I don't think he found them too funny."

"What'd you draw?" Cris asked.

"Him being hit by lightening and electrocuted."

"Real nice, Kayla," Ed said. "Real nice."

"I'm pretty sure the Fuhrer wanted to yell at me for that. It's just a good thing I didn't draw him blabbing about becoming the Fuhrer, otherwise he would've been pissed off at both me and Mustang."

"Yeah, you think?"

No lie, this is one of the stupidest and longestchapters I have ever typed. Just bear with me, and to all of Mustang's fangirls, I apologize; I couldn't help myself!