I guess we're roomies…
Authors: Halbloodprincess2 and Mrs. Panda Eyes
Summary: After escaping from the scene of a coughterriblecough crime Draco and Hermione find themselves stuck in the Room of Requirements. When they have to fulfil a series of challenges one question is posed, will they survive?
Disclaimer: Do you even need to ask?
Chapter Notes: Yah, third chapter, sorry it took so long to sort out, first Don (Halfbloodprincess2) took ages writing it p and then moi (Mrs. Panda Eyes) also took some time (though let it be known not as long as Halfbloodprincess2) to write it. Well that's all in the past, on with Chapter 3!
Hermione's POV
Okay. You've got to be kidding me. Me and Malfoy singing a romantic duet together? Yeah, and I'm marrying Dumbledore next year I scoff. There is absolutely no force in heaven or hell that can make me complete that utterly ridiculous task. Ugh! I have to calm down, I really must calm down before I go and do anything rash like murder Malfoy with a pick axe or something, not that there's a pick axe to hand or anything…I suppose I could conjure one up using my wand but…okay you know what never mind, I seem to be getting off the point here. Still, he'd be a great way to let of some steam….I conjure up a pillow (you know, the real thing full of feathers not those cheapo ones) and throw it at him. It bursts on impact. Ohhhh my godddddd that felt good, soooo goooooo…OW! Malfoy has just retaliated. Asshole. Well, if it's a pillow fight he wants. It's a pillow fight he's gunna get. I flick my wand and large number of pillows appear. They're numerous colours, green, yellow, blue, green, red, purple, orange, you name it it's there. I pick up one in each hand I whack Malfoy, oh yeah! You go girl! Woo! In a few minutes the pillow fight has reached full fury and feathers are flying everywhere, it's basically a feather storm. Gosh, they're getting everywhere, down my top, in my hair, my mouth, and my eyes and even in my shoes. Without warning the pillows disappear and Malfoy and I are left standing covered from head to foot in feathers. Haha, he looks so funny, like a giant chicken man. I crack myself up sometimes. When I've finished wiping away my tears of silent laughter I notice Malfoy studying something on the table. Oh dear, I guess this has something to do with the task. A small wooden box like…err…box has materialised on the table. Oh my god, it's a recordometer. They're antique; there are only like 5 left in the world. Wow. Even Malfoy, sorry Chicken Boy, is looking faintly impressed.
"Man those things are bloody expensive…!"
Oh yeah, state the obvious why don't you Malfoy!
"Isn't that a recordometer?" I ask cautiously, moving towards it. What if it's not and it blows up? (What? Don't look at me like that, how am I meant to know what it is? I have had some rather nasty experiences with unknown objects before).
As usual Malfoy is arrogant and conceited, "Yes….Let me guess…you read it in a book?"
I mean, so what if I did? Isn't it better to have a learned wife? No…wait…oh God, I didn't mean for it to sound like that. I don't mean Malfoy wants to marry me, I mean if he ever got married…quick say something, a witty retort; knock him off his high perch.
"Well…I did, what's so wrong about that?"
sarcastically Oh yes bravo, excellent reply, that will definitely go down in the books as the wittiest reply ever.
Humph.
"Well…what are we supposed to do with it?" (says who)
Beside the recodometer a slip of paper appears and I pick it up.
Sing in this, it will record you.
Record. It's going to record me and Malfoy. Me and Malfoy. Singing.
"Oh…God….KILL ME NOW!" I yell. Stuff Malfoy, we probably won't live to tell our tale anyway. Surely there's some way to avoid this ludicrous activity?
"So, let's put off time…" I say to no one in particular (Malfoy).
"Ok… How about we play truth or dare…!" He replies. Hmm…truth or dare, good one, but no. I'd rather keep my secrets and dignity.
"Noughts and Crosses?"
"Nah, we don't have parchment or quills, plus it's a silly game…"
Okay fine, whatever. We'll play truth or dare, but just truth because we can hardly do any dares here.
"I'm not playing truth or dare, I hate that game! Let's just play truth… I mean, we can learn more about each other and it's a good way to put off time…" I nod. I see Malfoy rolling his eyes. What? Why? He was the one who suggested it. Twat. A bottle of Veritaserum appears beside us.
"I'll start. Malfoy" I say quickly before he can object, "What's your deepest most darkest secret…?"
Malfoy's eyes widen and he opens his mouth in shock. Now's my chance. I leap forwards and shove the Veritaserum into his mouth.
Maybe this isn't so bad after all…
"My dad's idol is the Barbie doll. Yes the muggle one. Ever wondered about the long blonde hair?" He replies in a dull monotone.
Oh my golly, golly goodness. That's so freakin' hilarious. Oh my gosh, "HAHAHAHAHAHA" I should of guessed. "HAHAHAHAHAHA", the perfectly manicured nails, "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA", the lipstick, "HAHAHAHAHAHA", the millions of robes he changes like 10 times a day, "HAHAHAHA", OWWWW my side hurts. "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA" I have to stop laughing. "HAHAHAHAHAHA" But I can't. "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA" Maybe there's laughing gas in the room. "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA" Deep breaths Hermione, that's it, you're doing great. Wonderful…now one last deep breath…there all gone. I turn to face Malfoy, uhoh. Now it's my turn. Bum-oley. But before he even has the chance to open his mouth, a large red clock appears with yet another piece of paper.
You have 60 seconds to sing or this room blows up.
Oh, hey, the room's gonna blow up. Cool.
OH MY GOD THE ROOM'S GONNA EXPLODE!
Move Granger, MOVE, MOVE, MOVE! My heart pounds and I chase after Malfoy.
"OH MY GOD GRANGER DO SOMETHING! THE ROOM IS GOING TO FRICKIN BLOW UP! GRANGER DO SOMETHING! AHHHH" he screams losing all self control, and what dignity he had managed to retain up to that point.
I'm frustrated, "I'M TRYING, I'M TRYING MALFOY… DON'T PUT SO MUCH PRESSURE ON ME!" I yell back. God, why is it always up to me?
The next thing I know Malfoy has a firm grip on my shoulders and is shaking me backwards and forwards like a rag doll.
"GET A HOLD OF YOURSELF WOMAN!"
Did Malfoy just tell me Hermione Anne-Marie Granger to "get a hold of myself"? I splutter indignantly, but a piece of paper flutters to the ground beside us (I wonder if we'll drown in a sea of paper if we don't clear them up soon).
Just Kidding.
"What? Just effin' KIDDING! What the hell does Dumbledore think he's playing at? THAT BLOODY EFFIN THAT CAN GO SHOVE A NIFFLER UP HIS ASS!"
Malfoy says something, I don't hear what it is but I'm guessing he's telling me to calm down.
"Umm, Malfoy, I really think that we should start singing. I mean, the sooner we do it, the sooner we get over this…" I say restoring my cool composure. Malfoy being the immature prat he is just sits on the floor and moans, "No, no, no, no, no, no!"
Well fine, I'm hungry anyway.
"I'm hungry, I can't sing on an empty stomach" I say rubbing my stomach. I bet it's the evening meal in the Great Hall, all that foooood. Aaaah.
"What can I do about it...?" Malfoy asks stubbornly.
I really wish I had that gorgeous chicken quesadilla my mum makes….
A plateful of mashed potato and some kind of soup…I think…appears and CHICKEN QUESADILLA! Hurrah! I tuck in, not caring that Malfoy was watching. Yumm, sauce dribbles down my chin, crickey. I hurriedly wipe it away before Malfoy spots it. We both finished fairly quickly despite the large portions and Malfoy stands up and leaned against the wall and smirks. Ohhhhhh my god, he's soooo hot, why didn't I ever see it before? I cock my eyebrow at him, trying to act normal.
"What do you want Banshee Woman?" he smirks.
Banshee woman?
"Banshee Woman? At least I'm not a mama's boy." I retort. HAHAHA Granger 1 – Malfoy – 0! Woo!
"Well, that's because you're not a boy… duh Gra- Banshee Woman…" he stumbles. I roll my eyes, for goodness sake. I smack my head. Draco…errr…I mean Malfoy can be such a twit sometimes. I really, really think we should start singing now. I get up.
"I think we should start singing."
"Fine Smart-Ass Banshee Woman…"
I just roll my eyes (oh my god I've lost the will to scold -AN: Any of you people who watch F.R.I.E.N.D.S regularly will realize I've borrowed it from the show :p- and head towards the microphone that is now standing in the centre of the room. The lyrics are hovering in mid-air and the music begins to play.
"Over and over I look in your eyes you are all I desire you have captured me I want to hold you I want to be close to you," sings the wizard on the recordometer, I nod my head for a few chords and then gingerly start to sing,
"Over and over I look in your eyes,"
I smile, I'm good at this. Feeling a little bit more confident I sing a little bit louder, closing my eyes and swaying along to the music.
"You are all I desire, you have captured me" I sing loudly into the microphone. "I want to hold you I want to be close to you!"
I'm really getting into this! Out of the corner of my eye I can see Malfoy edging towards me.
"Fuck off Malfoy" I growl quietly.
Suddenly, like an explosion in my left ear Malfoy screams "I CAN'T DO THIS! I CAN'T SING THIS SONG WITH YOU OF ALL PEOPLE!"
"I'M NOT FORCING YOU MALFOY, BUT IF YOU WANT TO GET OUT OF HERE THEN YOU HAVE TO SING, OR SO HELP ME GOD I WILL MAKE YOU SING!" I yell back.
I will not, I repeat will not spend the rest of my life stuck here with Chicken Boy.
"WELL, YOU CAN'T MAKE ME SING!" he shouts angrily.
Oh dear. It seems he has under-estimated the power of Hermione Anne-Marie Granger. Well boy is he in for a shock. I leap onto his back, wrestling him to the floor whilst screaming,
"MALFOY YOU ARE GOING TO SING, AND YOU WILL LIKE IT. AND IF YOU DON'T SING I WILL STRANGLE YOU!"
If he doesn't sing, I don't know what I'll do. As much as I'd love to strangle him, I fear if Dumbledore finds me with the corpse of Draco Malfoy, Head Boy I will be demoted to prefect, and maybe not even that. I shudder at the thought. Behind me I hear yells and a loud thud. I jump up and look round to see what has caused to the commotion.
I just gape.
I really cannot believe my eyes.
"Are we interrupting anything?" Ginny Weasly asks, a small smile playing across her lips. She stood her arms folded across her chest and her hip stuck out jauntily.
I stare, "Ginny?"
"The one and only" she smiles and walks over to me.
Only then do I turn to see who her fellow companion is.
As is things couldn't get any weirder, I turn to face none other than Blaise Zabini.
"Dude, what are you doing here with Hermione 'Bookworm' Granger?" he queries, a perplexed look forming in his features.
"Blaise?" Malfoy looks equally confused (mmm he's uber cute when he's confused).
Mein Gott im Himmel -AN: Think Georgia Nicholson .-
Draco POV
No seriously…. A love song duet with Granger of all people? And… It's a muggle song to add petrol to the flame. If anyone finds out about this my reputation will be ruined! Granger is sitting there twiddling her thumbs while we are in the middle of a crisis here…. I start pacing and suddenly a pillow appears out of no where and Granger throws it at me! I naturally get annoyed and take the pillow and throw it back at her. Then multitudes of pillows appear. They are blue, red, pink, green, and yellow. I puck up two and bombard them at her… She says, "Well…" and picks up a yellow pillow and threw it at me with all the force she could muster up.
"So if that's how you wanna do it..!" I reply and throw the nearest pillow I can.
There are feathers flying everywhere and me and Granger are throwing at full force and speed. The pillow fight stopped when a recordometer appeared on the task table.
"Man those things are bloody expensive…!" I say I mean, yah we are freaking rich and we buy anything we want to, but this is an antique.
"Isn't that a recordometer?" asked Granger, edging towards it.
"Yes….Let me guess…you read it in a book?" I taunted with a mocking tone implying that she has no life.
"Well…" she huffed. "I did, what's so wrong about that?"
I heard a bit of hurt in her soft voice.
"Well…what are we supposed to do with it?"
Right on cue there appeared a piece of paper next to the recordometer:
Sing in this, it will record you.
So:
1) I have to sing a duet with Hermione "Bookworm" Granger.
2) We are being recorded whilst singing.
Surely this challenger is WHACKO! I would rather be caught by the population of Hogwarts wearing a tutu playing Barbies with my father. OK… maybe not. This information has probably just been indulged by Granger because she was hyperventilating and screaming,
"Oh….God….KILL ME NOW!"
I'm not doing this…Never ever, ever! I'm going to throw a temper tantrum.
"So let's put off time..!" said Granger.
"Ok… How about we play truth or dare…!" I said.
"Noughts and Crosses?" she said.
"Nah, we don't have parchment or quills, plus it's a silly game…" I said speaking words of wisdom and truth.
"I'm not playing truth or dare, I hate that game! Let's just play truth… I mean, we can learn more about each other and it's a good way to put off time…" said Herm-Granger.
I rolled my eyes and when I stopped rolling them I saw a bottle of Veritaserum next to us waiting to be used. This room gives up everything we want but a door to get out. Seriously, I'm really gonna kill myself soon.
"I'll start. Malfoy, what's your deepest most darkest secret…?" she asked. Oh my God. I'm not going to say it out loud. No, no, no…but then when I opened my mouth to scream the Veritaserum was stuffed into my mouth.
"My dad's idol is the Barbie doll. Yes the muggle one. Ever wondered about the long blonde hair?" I said.
After a dramatic pause of about 10 seconds Granger started laughing. And laughing. And laughing. AND LAUGHING. AND LAUGHING AND LAUGHING AND LAUGHING AND LAUGHING. GOSH SHE'S LAUGHING LIKE THE TIME I TWISTED MY ANKLE. THAT GIRL IS TWISTED. TWISTED I TELL YOU. I HOPE SHE DIES OF LAUGHTER. AGAIN. GOSH. That girl has a problem. And a severe one. But WAIT! It's my turn to ask her! Muhahahahahaha. But then, I was going to ask her when suddenly a big red clock appeared and started ticking. Another note appeared and it reads:
You have 60 seconds to sing or this room blows up.
Oh crap. We run towards the recordometer and Granger presses some buttons. The room will blow up….THE ROOM WILL BLOW UP!
"OH MY GOD GRANGER DO SOMETHING! THE ROOM IS GOING TO FRICKIN BLOW UP! GRANGER DO SOMETHING! AHHHH" I scream whilst running around the room like a headless chicken…Where has all my self dignity gone?
"I'M TRYING I'M TRYING MALFOY… DON'T PUT SO MUCH PRESSURE ON ME!" she yelled starting to become hysteric.
"GET A HOLD OF YOURSELF WOMAN!" I screamed at her whilst shaking her shoulders rapidly. The minute is over. Oh my God. The room is going to blow up. I'm too hot to die? NOOO. I've never seen the 'Big Apple'! Wait, I don't want to see the 'Big Apple'. The clock, it evaporated. What…a note?
Just Kidding. …. ….. …….. -- ……. ………. I will kill someone. Just Kidding. JUST KIDDING. THIS IS THE STUPIDEST PREDICAMENT I HAVE EVER BEEN IN! Grr…. What's Granger doing? Why is she jumping up and down and shouting obscenities. Wow….That girl can swear. Woah…
"Ok Granger, you can stop now! Seriously, stop swearing." I said, gosh, I'm probably the most mature person in this room. Well, there are only two people including me. The other person happens to be Granger. Why Granger. WHY, WHY, WHY?
"Umm, Malfoy, I really think that we should start singing. I mean, the sooner we do it, the sooner we get over this…" said Granger.
I plop down on the floor and cross my arms and say, "No, no, no, no, no, no!" like a little 3 year old throwing a temper tantrum.
Granger sits down and rolls her eyes. "I'm hungry, I can't sing on an empty stomach" she said rubbing her stomach.
"What can I do about it...?" I say, seriously, I can't just conjure up food from no where without stealing someone else's food, which would be stealing, which is not good. Not good at all. It's almost as bad as Father playing with Barbies. Ok, maybe not. Suddenly some food appears. It seems like our choice, because I get mashed potatoes and a Hungarian delicacy called Goulash soup. Granger gets chicken quesadilla. That girl has no class. What-So-EVER! So whatever, I start eating. Which is off the point. Really, really off the point. So I finish eating. And Granger is still eating. I'm tired of thinking and saying "Granger, Granger" so I think I'll call her "Banshee Woman". So I get back in character and lean against a wall and smirk. Oh yeah. Granger puts one eyebrow up and rolls her eyes. "What do you want Banshee Woman?" w00t! I got to use my latest insult.
"Banshee Woman? At least I'm not a mama's boy." Granger said.
"Well, that's because you're not a boy… duh Gra- Banshee Woman…"
She smacks her hand against her forehead. Gosh, sometimes I don't understand these Gryffindors. But then again, some of our Slytherins are kind of stupid. Like take Crabbe and Goyle. Goyle thinks he's a ballerina with a pink tutu, and Goyle is in love with Millicent Bullstrode. Blaise on the other hand is cool. I wonder why everyone thinks he is an Italian. Seriously, all those fanfiction authors out there. He isn't. He is black (A/N: For a fact I know that). I feel so loved. There is fanfiction about me out there. But who can blame them? I'm so hot. But then there are those fanfictions where I get together with Granger. What are they called again? Oh right, Dramiones. That is so stupid. And sometimes they ever pair up Blaise and little Weaslette. Blinnies. Those are even more pathetic. I mean, who thinks us superior Slytherins can get together with some…urgh….Gryffindors.
So, Granger gets up and says, "I think we should start singing."
"Fine Smart-Ass Banshee Woman…" I say.
She just rolls her eyes and goes towards the microphone. Well, here goes. The lyrics suddenly appear and the music for the song starts to play. We start singing
"Over and over I look in your eyes you are all I desire you have captured me I want to hold you I want to be close to you," I edge toward the microphone a bit more since my voice is obviously so much better than Granger because she is screaming like a banshee when she sings. Urgh, this song is…so not me.
"I CAN'T DO THIS! I CAN'T SING THIS SONG WITH YOU OF ALL PEOPLE!"
"I'M NOT FORCING YOU MALFOY BUT IF YOU WANT TO GET OUT OF HERE THEN YOU HAVE TO SING OR SO HELP ME GOD I WILL MAKE YOU SING!" Granger screamed. Gosh, that girl has a temper.
"WELL, YOU CAN'T MAKE ME SING!" I said defiantly, the wrath of Granger can't be too bad. Boy am I wrong. Granger has pushed me down on the floor and is strangling me whilst saying,
"MALFOY YOU ARE GOING TO SING, AND YOU WILL LIKE IT. AND IF YOU DON'T SING I WILL STRANGLE YOU!"
Then suddenly, two people fall in.
"Are we interrupting anything?" said a smirking Weaslette.
"Ginny?" said Granger
"The one and only" she replies and saunters over to Granger.
"Dude, what are you doing here with Hermione 'Bookworm' Granger?" asked Blaise with a confused look on his face. His NON-ITALIAN face.
"Blaise?" I asked.
This is too surreal to be true, well, at least Blaise is here to pinch me, I don't want Granger touching me.
Don: Over and over..I look in your eyes
Kat: You are all I desire you have captured me
Don: I want to hold you- Wait A minutet, What are we doing?
Kat: I don't know, you started it
Don: Are we entertaining our readers so they'll review?
Kat: I guess...
Don: WOO! Then review peeps!