CW: Discussion of mental health.

"Sargent Barnes, you failed to mention how beautiful this woman of yours is! Hi, my name is Shuri! I'm the one that was in your man's head. It's great to finally meet you!"

Harper blinked at the exuberant young woman. She appeared to be in her late teens and had the boundless energy to match. "Uhm… hi. My name is Harper. Pleased to meet you, too?"

She couldn't help the uncertainty in her voice, thrown by the whirlwind of rich orange material and braids. James, to his credit, remained entirely laid back, laughing at the young woman's antics. He chastised, "Shuri, let her breathe."

"Sorry, sorry," she grinned, not sound apologetic at all. She turned to the former soldier and asked, "Has my brother met her yet?"

"No, we spent the day with Steve."

"Captain Rogers never stays long. I'd like to take a blood sample next time he's here to compare to yours."

"Steve isn't a fan of poking and prodding," James replied, shaking his head with a mixture of amusement and disapproval. "What did you do today?"

That was apparently the key to opening the floodgates, because the young woman launched into an animated explanation of her day doing experiments Harper couldn't even begin to wrap her mind around. After several long minutes of trying to parse through all of the science mumbo jumbo, desperately seeking to at least grasp the gist of what the younger woman was saying, Harper gave up. She dropped her gaze to the tabletop, brows crawling closer together in frustration.

Her forehead soon relaxed as she accepted the defeat. Yet she couldn't help but shift uncomfortably in her seat. The movement didn't go unnoticed by James, whose eyes darted to her with concern and confusion. Harper once again lowered her eyes to the tabletop, trying to rein in her insecurities now that she was under his knowing gaze.

The brunette was accustomed to feeling like one of the smartest – if not the smartest – person in the room. Not for arrogance, really. It was the only real comfort she drew from most social situations. Intelligent insight was the only thing she really had to offer. She knew she was pretty awkward, that she had a difficult time being open with people, that she lacked any sense of light, happy humor. What did that leave, really? If she didn't have that to lean on, she felt totally lost on how to act or what to offer to others. Uninteresting, introverted, plain looking, out of her depth…

Harper arranged her expression to be a carefully guarded mask of curiosity and engagement. She nodded at the correct times and hummed to fill pauses. Her act certainly fooled Shuri, but she suspected James still had his concerns.

By the time Shuri had finished, dinner was on the table. Some kind of chicken stew with rice and greens. Shuri chatted with James more calmly as they both dug into their food. Harper watched quietly, picking lightly at her own plate. Shame and discomfort had stamped down any appetite she'd had. Unconsciously, her arm moved to wrap around the narrow stripe of her exposed midriff.

Observant as ever, a moment later Harper found herself with one of the brunet's scarves draped around her shoulders. She offered him a small, grateful smile, before gathering the material closed in her fist in front of her.

Shuri turned her sights back on Harper then and another wide grin spread across her face. "Alright, I've held myself back this long-"

That was holding back?!

"-but I have to know! How did you meet Sargent Barnes?"

"Bucky," James corrected automatically. Harper glanced at him, frowning. Did he really want everyone to call him that except her?

Harpers eyes fell to the piece of chicken she was chasing around her plate with her fork. "We ran into each other one night near my apartment. I was looking for my cat, and James helped find him. I saw him again in a coffee shop not long after that, forced a meet up for coffee on him, and things just naturally progressed from there."

"That is terrifically mundane and sweet," the scientist responded with another smile.

"Where is Aslan, by the way?" James asked. "While you're here, I mean."

"My parents are taking care of him," Harper answer, placing her fork down. "My mom texted me this morning that he's already been pretty anxious."

More guilt churned in her gut and tears stung at her eyes. She quickly shoved her emotions back into their respective compartments in her mind and took hold of the fork again. Shuri continued asking questions, which Harper answered politely, if not a bit vaguely. James filled in details where he could, but she could feel his bright blue eyes on her frequently.

"So you confessed to him?" Shuri asked with a laugh. "Sargent, I didn't take you for a coward."

James shrugged and said, "I'm just grateful she was braver than me."

The corners of her mouth twitched. He loved to sing her praises. Plus, his insight into her moods was not entirely burdensome. He seemed to realize that she wouldn't be capable of eating much and helped her to save face by slowly but surely stealing most of the food off her plate. Harper breathed out a soft sigh of relief as she lifted the last bite of rice to her lips. Finally, she was able to relax marginally when he bumped her knee beneath the table with his own then maintained the point of contact. She was seated to his left, so there was little else he could offer, but she drew comfort from him nonetheless.

The rest of the evening passed pleasantly, other than his growing concern for Harper. Bucky rarely saw her so uncomfortable and upset. But, then again, they had very rarely interacted together with other people and when they had, they were people she was already comfortable with. Even earlier with Steve, she had already spent a couple weeks with his friend and was comparatively more at ease. He also had a feeling she wasn't going to want to talk about it.

"It was great finally meeting you, Harper," Shuri said earnestly from the open doorway to his home. "A pleasure as always, Sargent Barnes."

"Bucky," he reminded patiently. "You're always welcome, Shuri. Though perhaps with a bit more notice for the time being."

"It was a pleasure meeting you, too," Harper said, a fake smile on her lips. "Have a good night!"

"You as well!" the scientist tossed over her shoulder as she disappeared in a swirl of long braids.

Silence and tension filled the small space, its occupants both knowing that there was a serious conversation that needed to take place. Neither said anything, moving about and cleaning up from dinner. They worked as an efficient unit until everything was as spotless as it had been before Shuri's arrival.

"Harper, are you alright?" Bucky asked finally.

"There's no way I can charm you into forgetting how awful I've been all night, huh?" she asked with a weak smile and a halfhearted upward tug of her top to flash a couple more inches of midriff.

The former soldier shook his head in the negative. "Not a chance, as much as I love the new clothes."

Harper looked down at herself with a frown. "Yeah, Kat has been trying to get me out of my comfort zone since I got back to Boston. Some days I feel great. Others, far from. I mean, I know that I'm not like… worrisomely large or super unhealthy or whatever, but I also know I'm not thin and that I don't have a flat stomach by any means."

"Harper, what truly minimal extra you have is in all the right places. Honest."

"Sure," she sighed, the melancholy evident in the way her whole form seemed to deflate with the exhale. "Anyway, if you can't be charmed, let's talk."

Bucky led the way to his bed, clicking on the bedside table lamp. He sat at the head while she sat at the foot, facing each other like they used to on her couch in Bucharest. Gently, Bucky repeated, "Are you alright, doll?"

"Well, I wasn't lying when I said that I've been better since being back in Boston," the brunette replied carefully.

"But you're not doing… well," he filled in slowly.

"Not completely," she sighed. "In a lot of ways, I can't even explain it. Most things have really started going a lot better in my life. I missed you terribly every day, and I've been having a really hard time with the clusters since I've been home, but by all other accounts, I should be happier. And I guess I am, but my moods… I don't know. I know that I should be happy, but it's like my brain won't let me. I don't know how to describe it."

"Just because things are going better doesn't mean that you feeling depressed just goes away, darlin'. Otherwise, I would've gotten over a hell of a lot of trauma while we were together in Bucharest."

Harper nodded and fisted her hands in the blanket in her lap. "I know. I guess I'm just frustrated with myself. And I do apologize, because that's just part of why I've been so off today. I just felt really insecure, and let it get the best of me."

Bucky reached out and covered one of her hands with his, fingers gently massaging her own digits out of their tight hold. "Can you explain?"

"I really like Steve," she prefaced. "Truly, I do. He's a great man, and I've met so few people as genuinely kind and self-sacrificing as him. I feel a lot of sympathy, because I feel like he's really been struggling, maybe even since before the Accords, to function in a world where things work in a way so contrary to his ethics."

"But?"

"But I feel like he's always testing me, scrutinizing me. I don't know what I can possibly do to prove to him that it's not a mistake that I've been allowed into your life, his life, this secret, special fold of enhanced people. And I felt like I seriously made a fool of myself earlier. Like I bombed a test by being too bumbling and awkward.

"Then Shuri came over and she's so much younger than me and is more intelligent than I could ever hope to be. She lost me within minutes of the rundown of her day. The one realm I usually feel confident and capable in – academic or otherwise intelligent conversation – didn't feel that way at all with her. I don't know, it just felt like today proved that maybe I don't actually have a hope of fitting in with you and the people in your life."

Bucky thought on her words for a beat before asking, "Do you feel like you're not good enough?"

"Maybe a little, but I think it's more about belonging. Like knowing I belong and being seen as someone who belongs in your life." Harper hesitated for a moment before continuing, "In Bucharest, I never got to know anyone from your life and now that I have and they're all extraordinary, it's hard not to feel insignificant or like a complete idiot for trying to fit in."

The former soldier laced his fingers with hers as she spoke, allowing his thumb to glide back and forth over the hills and valleys of her knuckles. He watched her as she talked, noticing the embarrassed flush of her cheeks and her downcast gaze. A frown matching the one she wore pulled at his lips. She had told him once before about the extent to which her confidence was a farce, and he had seen for himself how much of a front she put on for others. That day alone was a testament to how good an actor she could be; Steve and Shuri had seemingly no idea of Harper's discomfort. Bucky wondered vaguely how many cues he had missed in the first many months of knowing her.

Silence fell over them for a stretch after Harper's explanation. Finally, Bucky said, "I'm not as eloquent as you are, but I hope I can alleviate some of your concerns anyway."

"Alright," she muttered in a small, tentative voice.

"Steve, as much as I love him, hasn't been fair to you. And I'm really sorry for that."

"You don't need to be. He's trying to protect you, and I'm glad you have someone standing so firmly in your corner."

"I appreciate him, too, but I'm still frustrated that he's been hard on you. He told me once before that he thought you were too perfect. Seeing a cute moment today where you were flustered was honestly reassuring to him. I know I shouldn't ask anything more from you, doll, but please just give him more time. I know he'll come around."

Harper nodded and Bucky offered her a small smile before continuing, "And please don't worry too much about belonging. None of this is normal, none of us are normal. And I don't exactly belong either. You do know that I was basically the root cause of the Avengers breaking up? You are one of the most amazing people I've ever met, no superhuman abilities needed. You're the one that saved me, and you're where I belong. I know I can't just fix the things you don't feel confident in. But I can say that, no matter what, I love you and am better for having you."

"Can I ask you one thing?"

"Always. I promised you honesty."

A small smile tugged at her lips at that before disappearing again. "Why do you want everyone else to call you 'Bucky,' but with me…?"

She didn't finish the question, but the unsaid words hung in the air. The former soldier felt instantly guilty, realizing he must have been adding to her insecurity by creating yet another layer of separation between her and the others in his life. "I'm sorry, darlin', I didn't mean to make you feel any type of way with that. The answer is maybe a little convoluted."

"Explain anyway?" Harper requested.

"Before everything that happened, I was Bucky. I didn't much care for the name 'James' because it felt too stuffy and serious when all I wanted was to keep coasting through life on my natural skills and having as much fun as I could along the way. Then I went to war. To some I was Sargent Barnes, and to others I was still Bucky. After I fell from that godawful mountainside, was undone by HYDRA, I became the Winter Soldier. The Asset. Soldat. Assassin. Then everything happened in D.C. with Steve and when I… woke up, I guess… I didn't know who the hell I was. I ended up in Bucharest and was just a nameless transplant. And then I met you, and you asked me for my name and I panicked. How could I tell you, a total stranger, when it would lead straight to my real identity? So I word vomited and came out with James. And it was as James, with your support, that I was able to do a lot of healing and growing, that I rediscovered a lot about myself. I mean, god, I couldn't even choose my own coffee flavor went we met.

"Now that I feel like me again, I feel comfortable going by Bucky. I don't want to be a ghost with no name anymore. But I also don't want you to call me that. You met me as James, got to know me as James, saw me at my fuckin' worst as James. You using my real name, especially with all we've been through together, is so much better than calling me by my nickname, and I wouldn't want to share that with anyone else."

Harper nodded once, eyes unblinking as she turned over his words. "That makes me feel much better. Thank you."

"Something is still bothering you." He wasn't sure what it was, but something about her still spoke of continued worry.

"Is that really how I come off?" she asked quietly, head bowing slightly. With trepidation and a sheen of excess moisture in her eyes, she gazed up at him from beneath her lashes. "Too perfect? That sounds like a nice way of saying that I seem fake or robotic or something."

"I never thought that," the former soldier shook his head in the negative. "I've never seen that."

Harper huffed an agitated sigh before burying her face in her hands. "Sorry. I'm being awful."

Bucky placed his hand lightly at the crown of her head. "You're allowed to be upset, Harper."

They sat in silence for several long minutes. He hadn't seen Harper like this many times, but it was fascinating whenever it happened. She hardly moved, and was nearly silent even to his enhanced hearing. He knew vaguely that she was putting herself back together, doing whatever she did that allowed her to press forward as her usual self. Where he had immense body control, he felt like she had exceptional mental control.

She looked up slowly from between her fingers and muttered another apology. Bucky was on the verge of trying to comfort her when her phone vibrated between them. The screen went black only briefly before it lit up and buzzed with the arrival of another message. Harper reached for the item, her eyes sliding across the screen. Her expression remained neutral, though her cheeks flushed.

"Harper?"

"It's Wanda," she supplied.

"Oh?"

The brunette nodded. "She wants to know if I can walk straight."

It took the soldier a beat to understand the implication. "Oh."

"And suggested that I better just stay on my back or my knees if standing is a problem."

"Wow," the former soldier blinked in surprise. "That is… filthy."

"It is," Harper agreed. "I've already come to like her a lot."

Bucky chuckled and shook his head, filled with fondness for the dark haired woman. "Well, you were able to walk around just fine today. What if we address that?"

"I think that would be for the best."

A/N: Thank you so much for the support! I hope that adding more MCU characters into the mix feels natural. I think Harper would find Shuri a bit overwhelming given both of their personalities. I also feel like Wanda might have really let her sassy flag fly if there had been another younger woman in the group. But maybe not. We get so precious little information sometimes. Anyway, I hope you all will stick with me for the next update!