Beautiful Release
by Tina

---

After agreeing to be Ross' date on Monica and Chandler's wedding just the week before, Rachel started going out more often. After all, she wasn't scared of running into him anymore. In fact, she hoped to see him every time she set foot out of the apartment, always wishing to run into him whether she was at Central Perk or even at the grocery shop down the street. And each of the few encounters that happened on the course of that week were memorable in its own way, even though there was nothing too remarkable about them. They were always in the presence of their other four friends - Chandler and Joey quickly became her friends almost as much as they were Ross' - but that didn't stop them from flirting shamelessly.

Yet, that was all it was for the time being. Just flirting. Everything in its own time, they figured.

About a week before the wedding, all six friends were enjoying a nice cup of coffee at the coffee house, lazily watching time go by.

"I'll go get another cup of coffee for me. Does anybody want anything?" Ross offered to everybody, but his eyes darted straight at her.

She smiled.

"A blueberry muffin, please."

"On the way, Miss." He smiled back. "Anyone else?"

"No."

"I'm good, thanks."

He stood up and walked up to the counter, her eyes quietly following.

"Oh, Rachel and Phoebe, don't forget about the last dress fitting tomorrow at ten, OK?" Monica reminded them.

"Sure. Shall we meet you at your place?" Phoebe asked.

"Be there at nine thirty sharp."

Rachel smiled at her.

"We'll try." She said.

Ross approached and handed her a little plate with her muffin.

"Thanks."

"Always a pleasure."

He took his seat back on the couch, right next to her, as she started nibbling the muffin. There was a new conversation going on with their friends, but neither paid attention to it. Rachel smiled at him again and put the muffin down.

"You know, I was thinking..." She started.

"Yes?"

"If we're going to the wedding together, wouldn't it make sense if we went to the rehearsal dinner together aswell?"

He smiled widely.

"Interesting idea. It makes sense, it'll give us a chance to rehearse for it."

She laughed.

"So it'll be a rehearsal date?"

"Something like that."

"I like the sound of it."

With that, she picked up her muffin again and sat back, enjoying the atmosphere. It had been almost two months since she'd left Barry and not even once had she even considered the possibility of regretting her decision. This was so much different than what life had always been like for her, yet it made so much sense. It was so perfect for her somehow. She felt like a real part of it, an important part of a puzzle. Monica had even mentioned it once to her before, about how everything seemed complete with her. Three guys, three girls. And Mathematics was not nearly the most important part of it.

She wouldn't say it was all easy. But it was definitely worth it.

---

Rachel was applying the last touch of mascara when she heard the doorbell ring. Through the closed door, she listened as Phoebe welcomed Ross into their apartment and couldn't believe it that for once she'd managed to be ready on time. She looked at her wrist watch. Well, it made sense considering she'd begun getting ready over two hours before. Oh, she just wanted it to be perfect. Their first date.

She checked herself one more time in the mirror. The day before she'd decided to dye her hair back to blonde, for she didn't feel like she had anything to prove anymore. Neither to herself, nor to anyone else. He hadn't seen it yet, she wondered how he would react to it.

The golden locks were very straight at the root and cascaded down into long and yet very subtle curls. Her make up was relatively light, more focused on the eyes. She was wearing a strapless black dress, down to her knees, very flattering to her slim form.

With one deep breath, she left her room.

His eyes met hers and he almost had to brace himself. He never knew how she managed to take his breath away like that, no matter how many times they'd met, no matter the circumstances.

"Wow..." He whispered, feeling a little silly that he couldn't hold it in.

Rachel smiled widely.

"Hey."

"You look..." He shook his head, trying to think of a word. "You look great."

"Thank you." She said, well knowing through his eyes that "great" was a huge understatement to what he really had in mind. "You don't look so bad yourself..."

Phoebe smiled at the visible attraction both felt for each other, it was so obvious.

"Oh, get a room."

Both Ross and Rachel shot her a look.

"I better go and finish getting ready, my date will be here any second now!"

Phoebe almost skipped her way out of the room, while Rachel got her stuff together in her tiny bag. Ross watched.

"Hm, your hair...!"

"Oh, yeah, I decided to change it back yesterday. You like it?"

"It just reminds me you look beautiful any way."

She smiled.

"I'll take that as a yes."

He smiled back.

"Shall we?"

He offered her his hand. She smiled down at it and then took it.

"Sure."

---

They walked into the room hand in hand, still. Monica and Chandler stood a few feet from the doorway, greeting their guests as they walked in. Rachel quickly embraced her best friend into a heartfelt hug, whispering into her ear.

"Oh God, Monica, it's happening! I'm so happy for you."

"I know! Thank you, sweetie."

They broke the hug.

"I know how much you've always wanted this. In fact, look." She reached inside her purse and pulled a photograph out of it. She handed it to Monica. "I went looking for this the other day. Do you remember it?"

"Oh yes." Monica chuckled. "Chandler, look."

"It was Halloween and Monica dressed up as a bride. She even made me carry her veil around."

"Can I see it?" Ross asked.

"Sure."

Monica looked at Rachel lovingly.

"So, how's it going so far?" She asked in a low tone of voice.

Rachel smiled widely.

"Pretty great."

"I'm really happy for you guys too."

They hugged again.

After a few more sweet words and small talk, Ross and Rachel left so the line would move along. They approached the bar.

"In the mood for some wine?"

She smiled.

"Sure."

He ordered them some and, while the waiter served them, Rachel let her eyes wander around the room.

"Oh my God, is that Nora Bing?"

"Oh, yes."

Rachel gasped.

"She's related to Chandler?"

"She's his mom."

"You're kidding, right?"

He chuckled at her giddiness.

"No, it's true."

"Wow, that is so cool, I'm such a big fan of hers!"

"Yeah, Chandler does have an interesting family..."

"There's more?"

"See that woman in that black dress with pearls around her neck?"

"Yeah."

"It's his dad."

Rachel chuckled.

"OK, now you're kidding."

"Nope, that's Charles Bing. He stars in his own drag show in Vegas."

"Wow, Chandler Bing..."

She chuckled before sipping her wine. Ross kept looking at her, admiring her close presence.

"So how's it going at work?"

"Pretty good, yeah. It's good to finally really earn my things, you know?"

He nodded.

"I'm so proud of you."

She smiled at him.

"Me too."

They kept looking at each other and he picked her hand on his again.

The silence was soon interrupted, however.

"Son!"

Mr. and Mrs. Geller approached them.

"Oh, hey mom, dad."

"Hi, Mr. and Mrs-" Rachel stopped herself when Judy shot her a look. "Judy and Jack."

"Oh, how are you, dear? Monica told us about you and Barry."

"I'm great." Rachel said with a wide smile. "Our marriage had been crossing the finish line for a long time now, so..."

"Well, you look great!" Jack commented.

"I feel great!" Rachel added, chuckling.

Judy smiled at her, knowing this wasn't just a mask. Then she looked closely at her son and Rachel. Their closeness, this certain air around them. She raised an eyebrow, could it be? She smiled.

"Jack, look, Sylvia is here, let's go talk to her. We'll see you later, kids."

"Bye."

"See you."

"Wanna go to our table?" He offered.

"Sure."

He pulled the chair for her and everything.

"How's the new apartment doing? I hope you've managed to get some more stuff to fill it."

"One thing at a time, yes. It's filling up quite nicely, yeah."

She chuckled.

"Not a bachelor pad, I hope."

He laughed.

"Far from it." He looked at her for a while. "You should come over some time and meet it."

"Maybe..." She smiled before sipping her wine again.

He sipped some himself.

"So how do you like living with Phoebe so far?"

"Oh, it's been so much fun, Phoebe is such a great person. I know it may sound weird, but... in so many ways I just feel like I've known her for so much longer, you know? Well, not just her, but everyone. The other day it was only me and Joey and Chandler at the coffee house and I thought that was going to be so awkward, but oh... It had been such a long time since I last laughed that hard."

Ross nodded.

"Yeah, they're all really great. I used to question how we all got along so well, we're all so different. But I've stopped trying to find logic here, things like that just sorta happen. You can't explain them."

Rachel smiled at him, knowing that also applied to them.

"I know what you mean." She sighed. "And how has it been for you to live on your own? Is that too weird?"

"It was at first, I guess. I like being with someone, the stability and everything." He nodded, looking down at his glass. Then his eye met hers. "But you know, I didn't mean to hurt you that time I told you I was doing fine on my own. I mean, in a way I did, but..." He trailed off.

"I know, Ross."

"I guess I was just surprised, I really didn't think I'd be able stand on my own feet after so long. And, well, that added up to the fact that I was a little mad at you, I just..."

"I know."

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be, Ross. I'm sorry. It took me too long to see what was before me all along...! I don't know, in so many ways I knew, it was so obvious. I was just so scared."

He nodded.

"I know, Rach. You don't need to apologize either, I completely understand. I guess in spite of all the pain this might have caused, for me, this whole thing seems like it was necessary in so many ways."

"I know what you mean and I couldn't agree more."

He smiled at her and picked up her hand.

"So now we can do all that getting to know each other we talked about?" He asked.

She smiled.

"Yeah... Yeah, I guess we can."

"And I don't want us to rush into anything, specially after everything we've been through." She nodded, agreeing with his sincere words. "It just seems like maybe it's time for this. Don't you think?"

"Definitely." She said as she squeezed his hand. "One more minute without some sort of closeness and I would lose my mind...!"

He smiled and kissed her hand, but they were interrupted by Joey, who approached their table with a full place.

"Hey, guys, I hadn't seen you two here. You should try the shrimp, it's delicious."

Ross chuckled, while Rachel stared at his plate with disgust.

"Joey, I think that's a wax apple."

"Huh?" He looked at it. "Oh. No wonder I almost chipped my tooth with that. See, that's why I don't eat fruit, 'cause every time I try..."

Rachel shook her head, giggling.

"Do you want something from the appetizers buffet?" Ross asked her.

"Oh, I'm good. But I might steal something from your plate, so get lots of it."

He laughed.

"I'm not even gonna ask. It's on the way, Miss."

She smiled after him.

---

As dinner progressed, Ross and Rachel's opportunities to private conversations vanished. It was OK, though, they figured, since the most important issue had been talked out and they were still enjoying themselves with their close friends. As the party ended, rather early - after all the big day had yet to arrive - Ross offered to take Rachel home. She smiled at him.

"How about you take me to meet the bachelor pad instead?"

He smiled back.

"I won't say no to that..."

As they stepped inside the apartment, Ross flicked the lights on and sighed.

"Voila"

She walked in and looked around. The living room walls were wine colored, there was a single mattress on the floor, as well as a coffee table and a TV that sat on top of a box labeled "books". She turned around to face him and smiled.

"It's very nice."

He threw his wallet on the coffee table and nodded.

"It's not nearly ready yet, but..."

"Take your time with it, Ross. It's your home, so make it a home."

He smiled, knowing what she meant.

She took a seat on the mattress on the floor.

"Do you want something to drink? I've got wine, juice, water..."

"Wine would be great."

"Then it's on the way."

A few seconds later, he came back with a bottle of wine and two big disposable red cups.

"These are all I have for now, I hope you don't mind."

She laughed.

"Not at all."

He took a seat next to her. He poured the wine and they toasted to the wedding the next day.

"And you know what's weird?" She said.

"What?"

"Even though I'm getting out of a really bad marriage and everything... God, I still feel really good about Monica. I think she and Chandler will be so happy."

"I know what you mean. I guess, I don't know, some marriages are doomed to failture and that just can't make you swear off the whole idea all together." He nodded into space. "I also think they're gonna do great at it."

Rachel smiled at him for a while.

"Did you think you and Carol would be together forever?"

"God, I really did. We were so passionate when we first met, you know? And then... Well, after some time I guess we just settled down and that passion just started fading. At some point, I believe that's just what's supposed to happen, right? But for some reason she just got too distant and sometimes even aggressive with me. It got to a point that, I don't know, it was like we were complete strangers living together who wouldn't even talk anymore. If it wasn't for Ben, I think the divorce would have come much sooner."

"Yeah, I guess kids have that power, huh?"

"Yeah... We think we're doing what's best for them, but, really, how is keeping both parents miserable good for them? I've thought much about this lately and I really believe that this is what's best for Ben, as well as for all of us. We get to spare him of the fights and everything... And this way we all get a shot at being happy again, right?"

She smiled.

"Let's hope so."

He smiled back.

"How about you? Were you ever sure that Barry was the one?"

Rachel sighed and thought about it.

"No. I never even thought about it, actually. It was all just so perfectly set up, you know? We all knew what to do, it was so carefully instructed to us... And nobody ever even had to tell us. We just knew that was it. And at some point I guess I thought I loved him, I really did. And I really thought that was what I wanted. The big house, the expensive stuff, the trips and all. Ah, the dream of a doctor for a husband. It might have been what I wanted actually, but it was far from what I needed." Rachel looked at him and smiled a little sadly. "A year into my marriage I knew I was unhappy. Then came the antidepressants. Thing is, I was just too scared to really do anything about it. I never felt like I had anybody that would understand me, you know?"

"I understand..."

She smiled and shook her head, not wanting to play the role of the victim.

"But anyway... I'm just glad it's over, really."

He smiled back at her.

"Yeah, me too."

She sipped her wine, content.

"Have I mentioned how brave I think you are?"

She looked at him and grinned, flirtatiously brushing some hair out of her face.

"Not in those exact words."

"Well, I do."

She leaned closer and kissed him on the cheek.

"Thanks."

"And have I mentioned how beautiful I think you look tonight?" He said again, with an exaggerated expectant look.

Rachel giggled.

"Now you're just saying it to get another kiss."

"Can you blame me?"

Rachel hit him playfully across the chest.

"But you are, you know. Beautiful tonight, I mean. Well, not just tonight. But specially tonight, yes..."

She grinned and rolled her eyes playfully.

"I know, I know...!"

He chuckled and she accidentally spilled her wine onto the mattress and the floor.

"Oh, shoot! I'm so sorry, Ross."

He shook his head.

"Don't worry, Rachel, it's nothing. I'll clean it up later."

"I should go now." She said. "Now that I've already met the pad and marked my territory..." She pointed at the spilled wine.

He smiled at her.

"Do you want me to walk you home?"

"No, thanks, I'll be fine. I'm spending the night across the street at Monica's actually, with her and Phoebe. Chandler's sleeping over at Joey's."

"So I'm the only one who'll be sleeping by himself tonight?" He said with puppy eyes.

Rachel smiled adoringly.

"Nice try. I really gotta go now, I still got some stuff to do with the girls tonight and we'll be up early tomorrow. I don't want baggy eyes at the wedding."

"I bet you could pull that off."

Rachel chuckled.

"Don't push it, Ross."

They stood up.

"OK, goodnight, then." He said, walking her to the door.

He leaned closer and kissed her on her forehead. She smiled at him when they broke. She cupped his face and kissed him softly on the lips. When they parted, both kept their eyes closed for a moment, enjoying the feeling that kept going.

"Hm, goodnight."

She leaned towards his ear.

"And this was only the rehearsal." She whispered.

He chuckled.

---

About half an hour after joining the girls at Monica's apartment, there was a knock at the door and Rachel went to get it. It was Ross. Before she could make a joke about him not getting tired of her, she noticed the deep look of concern he wore.

"What happened?"

"Chandler took off."

"What?"

"Where's Monica?"

"She's steaming her dress. What do you mean Chandler took off?"

"I went to check on him and look what I found."

He handed her a piece of paper.

"Oh, no. Ross, you have to go find him!"

"I'll try, but on the mean time you cannot tell Monica."

"I won't."

"OK, keep your cell on, I'll keep you posted."

"Alright."

But Ross would only find his future brother-in-law the following morning, with the help of Phoebe. Rachel had been in charge of stalling Monica at home and because of the whole commotion she and Ross ended up leaving separately. As she was in the car with the bride, her cellphone rang.

"Hey..." she said sweetly, knowing it was him.

"Hey, so how's it going there?"

"Everything's fine. How about with you guys?"

"Everything under control now... I had to have a long conversation with Chandler about marriage and all, which he didn't want to listen to at first considering my current status..." He stopped to hear her adorable chuckle. "I guess he should have been there last night to listen to our conversation about it, huh?" He continued.

"No, that was just for us..."

Rachel blushed when she noticed the look Monica was giving her.

"Hm, listen, I better go now, you make sure everything's alright there and I'll make sure they are here. We'll talk after the wedding, OK?"

"Sure, ma'am."

She smiled.

"Bye."

"Bye."

She closed her phone and sighed, looking at Monica and grinning shamelessly.

"Stare all you want, I'm not even gonna try to wipe this off my face." Rachel said.

"Good, 'cause I like seeing you like this."

-

The wedding was beautiful. Joey arrived just in time after a long shooting to perform the ceremony himself and even decided to cut his speech short, a little relief for Monica and Chandler who'd had to listen to it about a million times - a whole nonsense about having, sharing, giving, and receiving. After they said their vows and exchanged I do's, the guests left the room and they stayed behind for photos, which took about half an hour. After they were all released, they went into the ballroom where the big party was being held.

"I think the lady owes me a dance now."

Rachel smiled at Ross.

"Alright, I'll make the sacrifice." She joked.

He took her hand and they walked to the dance floor. A slow song was on, so they didn't need further invitation to wrap their arms around each other. They were silent for a long time, enjoying the moment for what it was.

"Is it too soon for you to be seen with me like this in front of your family?"

"I don't care, Rachel."

"Oh, but, Ross..."

"Rach..." He looked at her, still carrying the slow pace of their dance. "OK, look... You're not just this amazing woman I really wanna be with. You're my friend too, aren't you?" She smiled. "I mean, I can count on that, can't I?"

"Of course you can."

"Then there you go... You know I'm ready to take you anyway I can, any way you'll let me. But if they don't, they can at least understand that I'm entitled the right to dance with my friend, don't you think?."

She hugged him again.

"Sometimes I think you're just too good to be true."

"I know..." He joked, just like she'd done the night before. They laughed together.

"That's how it works, isn't it?"

"What?"

"When there's friendship involved, just as much as passion. That's how relationships work, isn't it?"

"I guess so. I mean, with Carol all I had was the friendship part... which eventually faded without the passion."

"Well, I had neither with Barry..."

"But I thought you guys..." He trailed off. "I mean, once you insinuated something about the two of you sleeping together, I thought..."

"Oh, Ross..." She cut him. "I- I just wanted to hurt you, I'm sorry. I mean... we did- we did sleep together sometimes, yes... But..." She sighed, shaking her head. "It was Barry. It was nothing to me, it was..." She trailed off. "Please, believe me when I say we didn't have anything, even though in a way we had everything."

Ross smiled weakly and planted a perfect kiss on her shoulder.

"I believe you."

A long and comfortable silence followed.

"I guess we're just gonna have to wait and see how this friendship plus passion thing goes." He said.

"If you ask me, it seems like the perfect combination..."

They smiled and continued to sway together.

-

Monica and Chandler were about to take off to their honeymoon suite. But before they could, Monica announced on the stage that she would be throwing the bouquet, so she asked all single girls to approached. Rachel didn't bother, she carried on her conversation with Ross.

"Hey, Rach, aren't you coming?" Phoebe asked.

"Oh, no, no no. My divorce isn't even final yet, Phoebs, That wouldn't be appropriate."

But she had to admit she loved the look on Ross' face, pleased with the idea, somehow rooting for the thought of them being married soon. Rachel looked at him and they almost had an entire conversation with their eyes.

"Oh, come on, love birds, I know you want to. Plus, Rachel, nobody here even knows you were married. Well, just us. Oh, and Monica's parents. Oh, and Heather and Liam. And Patricia-" Phoebe stopped herself. "OK, that kind of back fired, didn't it?"

Rachel chuckled and nodded.

"It did."

"Oh, but come on, it's just for fun." Phoebe grabbed her arm. "It doesn't really mean anything."

"Come on, Rachel, don't be shy." They heard Monica say into the microphone. Many heads turned to them and Rachel turned red.

"Well, I guess now I have to..." Rachel said as she stood up. "Alright, I'll be right back." She said to Ross.

"Good luck." He wished, smiling widely.

Phoebe and Rachel joined the other many single women, most of them much to giddy about it for Rachel's taste.

"Alright, let's see who's gonna be the lucky lady tonight. Well, besides me, of course." Monica joked before turning around.

On a count of three she threw the bouquet, which would not have landed so perfectly on its target if carefully planned. Rachel held it, turning scarlet one more time as all the attention turned to her one more time.

"Oh, quit hogging the altar already." Phoebe commented, jokingly.

Rachel chuckled.

"Hey, you're the one who was talking me into this."

Monica turned and found the bouquet on Rachel's hand. She almost squealed and pointed at Rachel.

"Hah, you're gonna get married next!"

She came down and ran up to the girls.

"Or maybe it's a few years late, mistook it for my dead marriage..."

Monica threw her arms around Rachel.

"No way, we know exactly what this means."

Rachel looked down, smiling.

"Oh, this is so not the time to be thinking about weddings again...! Let's wait at least until the divorce is final."

"Alright, alright... one step at a time." Monica said, her giddiness however still very clear.

"Monica, shall we?" Chandler said as he joined the girls.

Monica smiled widely.

"We sure shall!"

Rachel and Phoebe laughed.

"Bye you guys, we'll see you in the morning."

"Bye."

"See ya, enjoy!" Phoebe shouted after them.

Rachel walked back to the table and smiled shyly at Ross. He smiled back.

"Do you believe in these things?" He asked.

She laughed nervously as she took her seat.

"I don't know. Why, do you?"

He chuckled.

"Again, I guess we'll have to wait and see, huh?"

She tilted her head adoringly.

"I guess so."

They exchanged looks.

"What are you thinking?" He asked her pretty much like he'd done so long ago, the first time they'd been together at that dark bar in the village.

"I'm thinking..." She trailed off, held his eyes for a second and smiled. "I'm thinking we're ready for what we've been rehearsing lately. And I don't just mean last night."

He smiled.

"I think you're right."

He leaned closer very slowly, making sure he was in friendly territory. She smiled and closed her eyes, which encouraged him.

Their lips met and he kissed her for all she was worth. After they broke, they smiled at each other adoringly for a long time and he brought his chair closer to hers. She caressed his face and let her fingers lightly slide down his neck.

"This is it." She whispered, meaningfully.

He nodded, looking straight into her eyes.

"This is it."

They smiled and kissed one more time.

"You are pulled from the wreckage
Of your silent reverie
You're in the arms of the angel
May you find some comfort there..."

---

Sorry Ben wasn't at the wedding, it would have made things more complicated. I hope you enjoyed this mighty long (longest so far) and fluffy chapter :D Weird structure (better yet, no structure at all!), but whatever. You guys inspired me and made me write as fast as I could because of all the many great reviews of the previous chapter! See how that influences me? hee! Well, that and the fact I just got a few days off because of a national holiday ;) But anyway...! Only an epilogue left now. I'm soooo gonna miss this story. I'm trying to fish out ideas for an upcoming story because I'm a sucker for Ross and Rachel fanfiction, yes... Oh, I can be such a nerd. So if you have one, send it my way, please? ;) Take care and don't forget to leave a review again! ;) Thanks for reading!