Disclaimer: JK ROLLING WROTE THIS NOT ME. ):
HEYHEY! This is a very very witty fic. I wrote this and I think it's really witty bcos im making fun of Ron Weasly! Enjoy the humoros fiction that ive wrote!
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Ron sat by the fireplace, stabbing at the dying embers. It felt as though he was stabbing at his own fiery heart. Hogwarts was THAT magical.
Over the course of the summer, Hermione's dentist parents had fixed her bucked teeth, and brought her for facials. She had also set up her own rockgothpunkpop band and was making headlines in both the moggle and wizarding world. As the lead singer of The Blowaway Bookish Cool Chestnuts, she had toured all over the world and was currently with a totally hot pale gothlooking guy, and they made out all the time.
Hermione was the cause of Ron's hot heartburn. It burned, like carpet burns, but somehow, this was far more painful. Ever.
She hadn't noticed him when came back, not even his fiery hair. "GAAAH" thought Ro man. He had been practicing over the summer and could now emote his feelings in single syllables. Only, the syllables could be really long. ( I like this one so funny! Hahax. But next, is quite scary. sry)
As the last of the embers died, Ron realised how depressed he was. It was like all the drops of icy water of depression had been collected in a pail and dumped onto him like all over again. Ron had heard of the legendary silver dagger that was fabled to heal all wounds. Maybe he'd go find it after grabbing a snack. Being upset always made him hungry. Very hungry. Yum.
He died with it in his chest in this hand.
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fin
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R AND R! the first part is humoros onli though, the other is scary. So sad right!