YO, YO, YO WHATS UP! I HAVEN'T BEEN AROUND LATELY, WHAT WITH COLLEGE AND BEING AT MY BOYFRIENDS AND ALL, BUT I'M ON A 4 HOUR BREAK AT COLLEGE AT THE MOMENT SO I THOUGHT I'D WRITE A SMALL YET RANDOM STORY!
SO HERE YOU GO, I HOPE YOU ENJOY AND ARE CONFUSED BY MY STRANGE AND RANDOM ANALAGYS!
DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN ANY OF THE FINAL FANTASY GANG OR ANY OTHER CHARACTERS WHO MAY APEAR.
CHAPTER 1
It was a bright sunny day in Spiral Chocolate land. Tidus was busy playing blitzball in the hot throthy chocolate river.
Wakka was also playing but in his strange way of kicking a chicken around yelling "Jump Willy".
Yuna watched on the bank of peanut butter and jelly, sprouled on a mat of rat fur.
Rikku was busy making sure she was as hyper as ever by eating a lolly- pop tree.
Lulu, being her usual boring self was plucking absently at a batch of liquorish
Auron was keeping himself busy by hunting flying pizzas.
All of a sudden they heard Tidus yell in shock, they all looked over to see Tidus sitting where the river once was, now empty and dry. They all looked around in surprise wondering what the hell happened. Then they saw the source of the problem, there also sitting in the middle was a huge fat man covered in chocolate.
"You there" said Tidus "what the hell do you think your doing"?
The huge man stood up in a wobbly fashion and looked at them all.
"Me name is Fat Bastard, an I was ungry"? The giant of a man exclaimed in a thick Scottish accent. He then looked over to where Lulu was sitting and saw a crib that little Vadina sat in. He stared it for a minute or so and then said. "I'll be out of your hair if you give me your baby". He dribbled whilst rubbing his belly.
"What do you mean, give you my baby"? Lulu asked in shock.
"Aw come on, the worlds over populated as it is, I'm sure by me eating that tasty little morsel, I'd be doing us all a favour".
Lulu looked at him discussed. Wakka ran over to him wife and child to protect them from this beast of a man. "Stay away from my daughter you sick fuck". Wakka cursed at him.
"Come on now; don't be like that, I won't my baby back, baby back, baby back ribs". Fat Bastard sung whilst doing a small jig.
Everybody looked at each other in unison and nodded. They all drew there weapons and attacked this freak of nature. They stabbed, they poked, they pummelled and they sliced until there was just blood and blubber left. They all looked at each other; they were all covered in blood. "Hmmm, think we could all do with a shower". Auron said.
"I'll say, and I can use all this blubber to make soap, to tell for extortionate prices to 3rd world countries"
They nodded in agreement and headed back to the housing area (blubber and all) to washed.
WELL THERE YOU HAVE IT, THE FIRST CHAPTER OF STORYS OF THOSE WHO ARE RETARDED!
IF ANY OF YOU WANNA GIVE ME IDEAS THEN FEEL FREE! SEE YOU ALL SOON.
REVIEW NOW!