Note: I do not own anything in this story. Anything HP related is JK Rowling's; the lyrics belong to The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus
Virginia Weasley sat under an old oak tree on the Hogwarts grounds, gazing out into the depths of the lake. The vast shores and the dark, deep water reminded her of everything present in her life. And there was a lot in her life - too much, if you asked her.
She sighed, flipping a page in the book she was supposed to be reading. Today was an oddity in the usual monotony of chilly November afternoons - it was rather warm. She had worn her flannel winter cloak when she came out earlier in the morning - it had been close to freezing then - and one of the sleeves fell midway down her left forearm.
Her arm was covered in white scars and various shades of red cuts. The right one - still hidden by the black flannel cloak - was almost identical to the left. Ginny quickly pulled her sleeve up, quickly glancing around to see if anyone had noticed, and after deciding that no one had, resumed her reading.
Later, she came to realize, she was wrong.
Draco Malfoy sat on a low wall ten or so feet from Ginny, merely observing the trivial scenes unfolding around him as he contemplated his life. He watched the Parkinson twins, practically glued at the waist as they flirted with the seldom passing boy. He snorted. Stupid sluts. Always deeply absorbed in the mediocre happenings of their surroundings. Draco's eyes wandered around, until they alighted on the smallest Weasel child, Ginny.
Draco frowned. Something wasn't right. He had noticed this almost a month ago, when he noticed she had been becoming less social and a lot more subdued. He appeared to be the only one that noticed - Granger and Potter and the other Weasel had barely glanced at the girl - though they weren't in love with her. Yes, he, Draco Malfoy, the pureblood wizard, next in line to be a Death Eater - until he was disowned - had fallen for Virginia Weasely, the blood-traiter.
Out of habit, he scratched underneath his robes at the still healing scars on his forearm, hardly wincing as several opened up and bled fresh again. Ignoring the blood from his reopened self-inflicted cuts, he decided to pass by the tree that she sat under. The tree was fairly wide, so he was able to hide behind the trunk as he peered at her solemn form. He watched as she gazed out at the lake for a few moments, then continued reading a book in her lap. It was a pity he couldn't see the title - Draco was almost as big of a book worm as that Granger was.
Well, almost.
He watched as Ginny flipped a page of the book, and another, and another. Suddenly, her sleeve slid down her arm, and a shiver ran up Draco's back. Her arms... worse than his. A lot worse.
As quietly as he could, Draco resumed his perch on the wall, gazing intently at Ginny with a combination of fear and pain and a whole hodgepodge of emotions that he didn't try to untangle. He watched the Golden Trio come out from the front doors and spot Ginny under the tree. They made a beeline towards her, faces etched with concern.
"Hey, Gin, fancy some company?" He heard her brother ask.
Ginny looked up and smiled at her brother, such a fake, cold, plastic smile. "No, that's okay, I'm fine," she convinced him, and the trio continued on.
When I see your smile
Tears roll down my face I can't replace
That smile. It brought cold, angry tears to Draco's eyes. He could tell - she was near breaking point. Who was he to figure that out? He had been there, of course, driven to numerous suicide attempts until he realized it wasn't death that he wanted. No, he wanted to make sure he would live. Only pain could make him sure that he was alive.
And now that I'm stronger I've figured out
How this world turns cold and breaks through my soul
And I know I'll find deep inside me I can be the one
Draco had become a different person - for the good in some ways and for the bad in others. But he had to help her. No one else could. He would watch her - make sure she didn't reach the edge. And if she did, he decided to be right there - either to pull her back or to fall down right at her side. No one deserved to go through this hell alone.
I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all
Even if saving you sends me to heaven.
His eyes widened in horror as he realized that they were all alone outside except for a select group of Slytherins - Zabini, Goyle, and Crabbe, to be exact - were ambling toward her with expectant smirks on their faces. Unaware of Draco, the three launched themselves onto Ginny, pawing at every inch of her body she could reach as she screamed in fright.
Quickly, he strode over to the mess of limbs that Ginny was buried under, and pulled her out. She didn't say a word as she ran off to the castle, tears streaming from her eyes. Quickly placing a few well-chosen jinxes on them - they hadn't been his companions since Lucius disowned him, though his name was still mud with the other Houses - he darted after Ginny.
It's okay.
It was all she could do from pulling the blade out and slashing her arms right there and then - Ginny ran for her life. She fled fast and far, deep into the dungeons, where she collapsed. Sobbing, she pulled out her blade, angrily tearing into her skin to release the crimson tears underneath - tears that showed a lot more pain than the ones that flowed down her cheeks. Over and over, she dug angrily into her arms and legs, just praying that her guardian angel would save her from utter destruction.
It's okay.
She wanted to die - she could end it now. Just one slash and everything would be over. Stricken by anger and pain, she raised her blade to slit each wrist.
Draco ran as far as he could, following the swish of her fiery red hair and the echo of her footsteps as she ran down the corridors into the dungeons. But soon he lost track of her - the dungeons were simply too big. As fast as he could, he checked each room and cavern, searching for that head of fiery red hair.
He found her almost ten minutes later, and his stomach flipped in the air as he witnessed her bring the blade down onto her wrist, slashing at the veins as more blood pumped out. More streamed out of numerous deep gashes all over her arms and legs. Draco ran towards her as she toppled over, and he feared the worst. This was a lot of blood - a whole lot more than he had ever shed.
It's okay.
He scooped her up into his arms, not caring about staining his pristine, expensive clothing - it was just more of a reminder of his disowning - and made a mad dash to the infirmary. Numerous people passed with dropped jaws - a Slytherin helping a Gryffindor? Or had he done this to her? The world, it seemed, was coming to a virtual halt.
Seasons are changing
And waves are crashing
And stars are falling all for us.
Madam Pomfrey bustled over to Draco as fast as she could. "She did this to herself," he told the witch breathlessly; Ginny was extremely light, but carrying her as fast as he had took a lot out of him. "I'm not sure how much blood she's lost, but I can tell you that it was a pretty large amount."
"Very well - now go! I must tend to her as quickly as I can!" With that, she shooed Draco from the infirmary.
Days grow longer and nights grow shorter
I can show you I'll be the one.
He went back to his dorm, knowing that it would be hours - days even - until he would be allowed to see Ginny. Noticing that the dorm was empty, he put a Silencing Charm and a Locking Spell on the dormitory door. Then he preceded to scream his lungs out until there was nothing left. He was gripped by a sudden idea, and pulled a knife out of his bedside drawer, pausing briefly to admire the way the light caught the razor-sharp edge. He cut thin, deep lines into his skin, overlapping and curving them just right until a picture was distinguishable.
An angel.
She was tattered, torn, and broken, but nevertheless, she was an angel. The crimson blood that trickled down his arm reminded him of Ginny's hair, the way it swung around as she ran blindly down to the dungeons where Draco had found her. Where she had nearly died.
Or maybe nearly wasn't enough.
He choked back a sob. No. She would survive. He was going to make sure of that. Draco loved her with all his heart. He would do anything to help her, even if he had to die to do it. He knew how she felt, how it feels to want to die, how he had to hurt himself on the outside to have even the slightest chance to kill the thing on the inside. And he would make sure that Ginny knew it.
I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all
Even if saving you sends me to heaven.
Pain. That was all it took for Ginny to know she was alive. She still felt it. And for the first time, she wasn't glad she felt it. She was supposed to be dead!
There was a voice speaking - a guy's voice. "Please wake up, Ginny," he sobbed. "You need to come back to me... or I'll have to join you in eternal sleep."
She opened her eyes tiredly, shocked at what she had heard, even more at whose voice it was. She had fancied Draco for months, but never thought he'd return the feeling, especially not as deeply.
Even though she could barely see, the head of pale blond hair confirmed it, though barely visible by the moonlight streaming through the window. Her wrists, arms, and legs were starting to hurt, and she moaned a little.
Draco looked up, and she saw his tear-stained face and his red, swollen eyes. "I found you, you know," he said gently.
Something she had said while she cut herself popped into her mind, "My guardian angel," she murmured under her breath. "Did you mean what you said?"
He locked his eyes into hers and pulled up his sleeve to reveal the broken angel he had carved into his arm. It still bled slightly, but it was better than it had been before. All the scars and cuts were still visible around and underneath it. "Every word of it." She stared at the angel for a moment, then burst into tears.
He sat on the bed and let her crawl into his arms, holding her as tight as he could without putting her in any discomfort. She sobbed into his chest, and he put his chin on her head, tears streaming down his own cheeks once again. He was so grateful that she was alive, and so grateful that she was here, in his arms.
She finally looked up, her tear-streaked, red-eyed face matching his. "I love you," she whispered.
"Forever," he whispered back as he kissed her.
Cause you're my, you're my, my true love, my whole heart
Please don't throw that away
Cause I'm here for you.
Draco had helped Ginny through everything - the cutting, the suicidal feelings, the depression - all of it. They had found what they were - one soul in two bodies. Together they had healed. But, months later, together they fell apart again.
It was early April when Ginny knew that she wanted to end her life. The cutting had taken over her again - and Draco, too. She planned it carefully, two months of work put into her scheme. And finally it was ready.
It was mid-May when she woke for the last time. She fell asleep early, savoring the last night of sleep she would ever have. It was eleven-thirty when she woke, but no one was in the common room as she quietly padded down the stairs. Ginny slipped out of the common room and into the corridors, out of sight.
Draco woke with a start. Something wasn't right. The angel star on his arm itched and tickled, but he knew it wasn't infected. There was something wrong with Ginny. He, too, slipped out of his dormitory and into the halls.
It didn't take long for him to find a whip of red hair turn down a corridor, hardly visible in the dark castle. He followed it as best as he could, until he finally reached a door high up in the castle. The Astronomy tower.
Please don't walk away
Please tell me you'll stay, stay.
He opened the door and stepped out onto the landing. A note lay on the hard stone ground, while Ginny stood on the ledge. Draco had to admit, she did look beautiful, though in a deathly way. She wore white robes that rippled from the wind, and a pair of white feathered wings on her back. Her long, red hair fluttered out behind her.
"No!" he shouted, and she looked back at him, her face streaked with tears.
"I'm sorry, Draco." She looked down at the grown, hundreds of feet below, then back at him. There was a haunted, desperate look in her eye that chilled him all over. It was even worse than when he first saw her arm, for now he knew how badly she wanted this.
To his surprise, she stepped off the ledge and threw herself into his arms, sobbing. Draco grabbed her and kissed her passionately, conveying all his love for her in that single kiss. She kissed back, just as passionately, then drew back. "I love you, Draco," she cried, then, before he could stop her, she ran back to the ledge and threw herself off.
Use me as you will
Pull my strings just for a thrill
And I know I'll be okay
Though my skies are turning gray.
No. This couldn't be. Draco was frozen to the spot. He was supposed to save her from destruction, but he knew it was too late. He licked his lips, and still felt the taste of hers on them. He had nothing to live for now that she was gone. So he, too, threw himself over the edge of the Astronomy tower.
I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all
Even if saving you sends me to heaven.