Here We Go Again
Disclaimer! I don't, and sadly never will, own Naruto. The closest I shall ever come is in the form of graphic novels, original characters and my own demented dreams. Also, suing me is pointless, as I'm dirt-poor and not making a cent off this venture.
Thanks to my reviewers: GodessforshortShar and Anasha Atla. Appreciate the compliments!
Chapter 3: Conflict
The sun began to set at just the right angle behind Naruto and Sakura, making their kiss uber-romantic. Sadly, Kakashi was the only one around to appreciate it. And he was busy with his book. After a few more moments, Sakura broke away from Naruto, who stood there with a dazed smile on his face. "...when?" he stammered. Sakura raised an eyebrow.
"Huh? When what?" she asked him.
Shaking his head, Naruto brought some sembalance of coherance to his thoughts. Clearing his throat, he started over. "Okay... when the hell did this happen?" he spat out. "Not that I'm complaining or anything, but... y'know?" he quickly added, turning to the side while thoughtfully scratching his jaw.
Sakura sighed and dropped to the ground, drawing her knees up to her. Without looking at Naruto, she spoke "I... don't really know. I mean, after you came back from your training with Jiraiya-sama, I was happy you were back. In a 'I-missed-you-as-a-friend' kind of way, but that started to change. The fight with Sasori to save Gaara, Chiyo-san's death..." Sakura halted for a moment, the painful memories building up. Drawing a deep breath, she resumed speaking "... and the fight with Orochimaru at the bridge when you... changed... I..." She stopped again, her emotions beginning to overwhelm her.
Naruto stood, watching as the girl he'd loved since before he'd had friends, who apparently had finally decided to return his feelings, struggled with her emotions. Strange, unfamiliar impulses told him to hold her, to take her into his arms. A lifetime of taking crap told him she'd be fine. An unidentified source told him something that didn't quite make sense, but made him blush quite fiercely nonetheless. He shook his head to shut up all the impulses, and forced his focus inwards. 'Hey, fox bastard! You there?' Naruto called out into his cavernous mindscape.
'You need not be so loud, brat' came the Kyuubi's 'voice', sounding almost... tired?
'Oi, you not getting enough sleep fox?' Naruto's mental voice carried a definate sarcastic edge. 'I didn't even think you needed sleep. Huh, that's two really interesting facts I've learned today...'
'I don't sleep you idiot. You drained off nearly a full tail's worth of power for that stunt with the Uchiha brat. Do you even realize how much chakra is required to outmanuver the Sharingan with the human body's pitiful limitations? Short of using the Heavenly Gates, I mean, but still...' the sealed demon snarled at his prison, not sounding terribly threatening, given his unmistakable weariness.
'So, I can use up enough of your chakra to permanantly, what, demote you or something? Cool!' Naruto said with his best smirk.
'You couldn't possibly be this irritating intentionally, you do realize this?' Kyuubi said with a very Shikamaru-sounding sigh. 'Why exactly are you bothering me anyway? I... helped...' Kyuubi's tone at the word help had made it sound like the fox demon would very likely retch, had he the capacity to do so '...so do you plan to explain yourself?' Naruto mentally shrugged, thinking to himself for a moment.
'Okay, first off, it's my head, so shut up. Second, I need some advice from you'
'It concerns your bitch, right?'
'She's not a... right, right, had this conversation with Kiba. Dogs call girls bitches.'
'I AM NOT A DOG'
'Canines, dogs, whatever...'
At this point a tic-mark was actually visible on Kyuubi's 'head' . 'Look, she's likely in heat, so just take care of that and you'll be fine. If you need an explanation of THAT, ask the dog-boy.'
Having already had several conversations with Jiraiya along those lines, Naruto just blushed. 'I think this is something more along emotional lines, actually...'
'Then you're screwed. I know two human emotions, the satisfaction that only destruction can bring, and as of today, complete and total annoyance. Now leave me alone, I need to rest, so to speak.' And with that, Kyuubi's presence all but vanished from Naruto's awareness. Naruto stood alone in the carvens which formed his mental landscape.
'Damn!'
Sakura stared at Naruto curiously, wondering why he looked so... blank. Suddenly he muttered something that sounded like damn, and shook his head. "Oh, Sakura... I...uh...' Naruto stuttered as his brain grappled with the current situation, and Kyuubi's suggested solution.
"What were you doing Naruto? It almost seemed like you'd fallen asleep standing up, except that you weren't snoring' she asked as she stood up, brushing off her pants. Naruto couldn't help but notice as her hands traced her 'lines', as Jiraiya would call them. Sakura glanced at Naruto, then promptly smacked him on the head after following his gaze. "Ahem. My answer please?" she stated, hands going to her hips in mimicry of Tsunade's 'no-bull' stance.
Raising his hands defensely, he shook his head. "It wasn't anything perverted, honest! I was asking the bastard fox something, and he made some, ah, 'interesting' suggestions, but...' he said while beginning to back up, looking over his shoulder as he did. Turning back, Sakura was right there, in his face.
"That's all? You had me worried for a minute, dummy. C'mon, lets get some ramen. My treat' she called out as she walked past Naruto. Naruto stood there for a moment, his brain realizing that he wasn't about to get pulped. Then Sakura's offer registered.
"First she says she doesn't love the bastard, then she says that she loves me, than she offers to treat me to ramen? I must've died after beating Sasuke and gone to Heaven" Naruto said with a grin.
Unbeknownst to either of them, Kakashi sat in a nearby tree, smiling approvingly behind his mask. "Hm. Good for him. He finally suceeded in one of his short-term goals. Now he just needs to make Hokage and he's all set" he said to a nearby chipmunk, which chattered in response and scampered away. Kakashi just shrugged and resumed reading his new issue of Itcha-Itcha Paradise.
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Naruto and Sakura sat at Ichiraku, Naruto covering the events of the previous day. "...and then Shikamaru says 'and Kiba and Ino talked some sense into Neji' and my brain crashed or something when I realized what he'd said" Naruto said as he nearly fell off his stool from laughter.
Sakura giggled into her hands, then looked at Naruto. "Ino and Kiba talk sense? That'll be the day Kakashi-sensei gets a girlfriend" she dead-panned, then cracked up. A voice from behind stopped both of them dead in mid-laugh.
"I don't see what's some damn funny Sakura. You're the one having lunch with Naruto" Ino said as she calmly sat down on a stool to Naruto's right, placing him in the eye of the storm.
Sakura nonchalantly shrugged. "Well, one of us had to get around to getting a boyfriend. Not my fault that I realized Sasuke wasn't going to happen in this lifetime" she said as she slurped down some of her pork miso. Ino began a comeback, and then realized what Sakura'd said. Her mouth hanging open, she looked slowly at Naruto, who grinned sheepishly with a light blush, then to Sakura, who stuck out her tongue. Holding up a hand, she rested her forehead in the palm of the other.
"Give me just one minute. I think MY brain just crashed" she said as she slowly rubbed her forehead. "OKay, now, from the top, in order of importance. 1. You just said that you've given up on Sasuke-kun? 2. Did you just say that Naruto was your BOYFRIEND?" Ino more or less said this last part at the maximum possible volume allowed by her current lung capacity. At this point Naruto's face was about the same shade of red as Sakura's old outfit.
And got several darker as he heard one of the three worst possible voices come from behind him. "Did I just hear Naruto is Sakura-chan's boyfriend? Ohhh, my friend, I am jealous of you! You have succeeded where I have failed twice now! I am ashamed." Naruto dropped his head.
"Hey Fuzzy-brows, how's it going?" he droned, while wondering exactly which Kami he'd offended...
Several hours and virtually everyone they knew later, Naruto and Sakura managed to quash any inaccuracies pertaining to their budding relationship, especially the questions Kiba had asked along lines suspiciously like Kyuubi's suggestions earlier in the day. Finally escaping everyone, Naruto and Sakura decided to take a quiet walk. As they meandered their way across Konoha, they came to the training field where they'd had the 'bell challenge' against Kakashi. Climbing a tree, they watched as the moon crept above the horizon. "It's beautiful, isn't it Naruto?" Sakura sighed, leaning against the tree trunk.
"Yeah, but I can think of something better" Naruto said with a small grin.
"Flirt."
"This from the girl who ambush-kissed me." Both of them had a short laugh about that. Dropping from their perch, they began towards Sakura's home, when a voice from behind stopped them.
"Naruto. I need to talk to you. Alone" Neji said as he stepped out from the shadows.
"Neji" Naruto half-growled. "Whaddya want? If this has to do with Hinata-chan..."
Neji cut him off with a glare. "Don't speak her name. I still blame you... but, as per Kiba and Ino's...advice... I will not seek revenge on you Uzumaki. But should we, for any reason, ever meet in combat, don't expect mercy" the Hyuuga said coldly as he walked away.
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Two days later, the Leaf declared war on the Hidden Sound village, based on information extracted from the interrogation of Uchiha Sasuke. Naruto, who was promoted to Chuunin and given a squad of his own to command, was placed in the Assault Corps. Sakura naturally was placed into the Medical Corps, under the direct command of the Hokage herself. Naruto's squad consisted primarily of Genins and other recently promoted Chuunin, including one spanking new Genin by the name of Konohamaru...
3 hours after the surprise promotion by Tsunade, Naruto was reviewing the troops, who, in honor of the Prince of Pranks of Konoha, all turned out wearing masks. Naruto just dropped his head and shook it. 'So this is what Iruka-sensei went through with me... I guess that thing about hindsight being 20-20 was right' he thought as he looked over the troops. "Okay, here's the deal. I want each of you to show me your top jutsu once we arrive at the training field, okay?" A few minutes later they had all lined up in the field, masks still in place. "Okay, show me whatcha got" Naruto spat out, doing his best possible impression of Iruka on a bad day. Naturally he failed miserably. 3 katons, a genjutsu, 2 bloodlimits and a mizu bunshin later; only two members of his squad remained. One looked to be about Naruto's own height, but several times his weight. The blonde ninja sighed. "Chouji, take off the stupid tanuki mask" he sighed as he shook his head.
As the mask came away, Chouji grinned sheepishly. "How'd you know it was me, Naruto?" he asked, producing a bag of chips to eat.
"Call it a hunch Chouji, just a hunch. You don't need to show me your best jutsu. I know what you can do" he said as he stepped over to the last member of his team. 'Well, that explains that promise Shikamaru made me give him about not letting him use that' he thought as he stepped in front of the last one, obviously a Genin, likely fresh from the Academy. He wore a kitsune mask haphazardly wrapped in a... scarf? "Okay shrimp, your go. Let's see your best jutsu" he said, crossing his arms over his chest.
Bringing his arms up in front of him, the kit-nin flashed the seals for Henge, then cried "Sexy no Jutsu!" and transformed into a gorgeous, naked brunette. Most of the male squad members got a nosebleed at the very least, Chouji likely the only exception other than Naurto.
Said squad leader just reached out and thumped the girl atop the head and said "Dammit, if you're gonna try and pass that off as original, don't try it with it's creator Konohamaru!" In a puff of smoke, the girl was gone, and Konohamaru unwrapped his scarf from around his head and pulled off the mask.
"Sorry big bro, couldn't resist" he said with a cheeky grin.
'Okay, so Obaa-chan AND the Kami hate me' Naruto thought as he dismissed his team and headed home. This had been one tiring day.
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Three days later, Naruto's squad were the first to see combat, encountering a Sound patrol one kilometer from the Sound/Fire border. Naruto frowned at the fact that they seemed to be waiting for something as the forward scout, one of the Katon users named Nakano Ruriko, had reported. 'Six' the girl mouthed. Naruto frowned.
'Are you sure there's only six? Damn. They're probably strong' he said, hoping that none of them were as bad as him at lip-reading. Moving his squad into a formation Kakashi had taught them way back when, he cautiously began to move the team forward. And everything went to hell.
Before they'd gone ten steps, a massive gust rushed through the woods, blowing away their cover and any sembalance of formation. A moment later, a kunai whizzed by the still stunned Naruto and buried itself in Ruriko's throat. She could only look helplessly at her leader before she dropped to the ground, a doll with cut strings.
"Dammit! Ruriko's down! They have at least one Sand traitor too!" Naruto yelled as the chaos erupted around him. A confident looking older ninja and what could only be a genin rushed at the other remaining Chuunin besides Naruto and Chouji, the genjutsu user, Nozara Yoritomo. Closing on him, they both began jutsu's, then halted, their faces paling. Before they could take another step or form another seal, Yoritomo calmly slit their throats, his genjutsu "Zettai-Kyoufushin" having done exactly what it was made to do. Another Sound nin rushed towards two of the Genins and, his hands blurring into seals, engulfed one of them with a Goukakyuu no Jutsu.
Turning to face the other, he found an impossibly smug look on the genin's face. "What're you smiling at, punk? Your buddy just got torched"
Mazaki Kuemon just shook his head. "You obviously are from Konoha. Haven't you ever heard of the Tenshin clan?" he said with mirth in his eyes. The traitor's eyes widened as he realized his error in jutsu, a moment before the katar on Tenshin Yasuoka's right forearm pierced his skull.
Turning to his sword-wielding friend, he scowled. "Just 'cause my bloodlimit makes me immune to the damaging effects of fire doesn't mean it doesn't still suck to be set on fire, ass!" Kuemon could only shrug and grin.
Another of the genins was over his head as he battled a girl his age. Attempting the taijutsu that he truly excelled at on the girl, he quickly discovered that her skin had the consistancy of stone.
"Damn" he swore "guess that means you came from Hidden Rock, huh? It that case..." he trailed off as he began seals for his bloodlimit. "Looks like I'm done, but so are you bitch!" he cried as his seals finished, and he blurred, appearing behind her. Grabbing her in a bearhug, he spoke through gritted teeth. "Y'know, this is a damn shame, 'cause you're pretty cute. Can't be helped though" The rock-nin struggled, but couldn't break his grip.
"What's the point of grabbing me and shamelessly flirting with me? Do you think we're both about to die or something?" she sneered as she felt his iron grip slacken every so slightly. Glancing at his face over her shoulder, she was shocked to see his face covered in foul boils.
"Actually, yeah" he chuckled hoarsely. "Y'see, my family has an odd sorta bloodlimit. It kills the enemy and the user, by breaking us both down on a cellular level. Neat huh?" he croaked out before vomiting blood all over her and dying.
Meanwhile, Chouji squared off against the wind-user, a girl wielding a fan half-again the size of Temari's. Sizing it up, he whistled. "That's a big fan for such a little girl. Shame it won't help against me" he said with a honest grin. The girl scowled, marring her pretty face.
"We'll see... Kamaitachi!" she cryed as she swung her oversized weapon. Chouji sighed, and his hands quickly executed the seals for a jutsu, finishing just as the Kamaitachi struck. The fan-user smiled smugly as the dust began to settle, but then a tremendous object plowed forward from the dust-cloud and almost crushed her. Her precious fan, however, did fall victim to the Akimichi clan's favorite techiniques, Multi-size and Meat Tank. Quickly pivoting, Chouji made another pass, feeling a meaty squish this time as well as a distinctive crunching sound. Releasing the multi-size, Chouji looked down at his gore-covered clothes and sighed. Not only was his mother going to kill him over this mess, but he'd crushed his last bag of rippled chips too...
The rock-nin looked repulsed as the quickly deteriorating corpse slid off her shoulder. She was thankful for her own bloodlimit, which she was sure why she wasn't in the same condition as the leaf idiot rotting on the ground. She could only consider things for another moment before a massive fireball engulfed her, scorching her weakened flesh. As she looked up, a fuuma shuriken embedded itself into her head. A pair of hungry eyes watched as the brown-haired girl retrieved her weapon, and re-grouped with the other surviving Leaf-nins...
"Who's still here?" Naruto asked at his team came back together. Getting a fairly cheerful here from Kuemon and a grunbled here from Yasuoka, Naruto nodded. The other Chuunin nodded, signifying that they were okay. Konohamaru mumbled something unpleasant, but was in good enough shape. The shuriken user, Hanako, began to speak, but a huge sword emerged from her chest before she could speak, then was casually and roughly yanked back out. Before them stood a lanky, hollow-eyed man with a slight grin on his face.
"Man oh man, do I love killing girls... it's just so much fun!" he said gleefully. Naruto didn't hear any of it though, as his eyes were on the sword he carried.
"Zabuza" Naruto whispered as the mad ninja before him quickly executed the seals for Kirigakure no Jutsu and buried them all in mist. "Damn! Pair up! I know this style of fighting!" Naruto called into the murky fog concealing everything. "Konohamaru, listen to me. This guy is really crazy, and I know that sword he has. It's Zabuza's sword, Kuribiki ... something ... forget it, the name's not important. The point is, I'm gonna attack this guy as soon as I figure out where he is. I want you to grab the other surviving genins and run. Chouji and Yori oughta be fine, but I want the rest of you outta here, understand?" Konohamaru nodded, a somewhat pointless gesture, but Naruto got the point all the same.
"One question though..."
"What?"
"How are you gonna find him?"
Meanwhile, Sekine Ryobe stalked his next prey. The other girl had immediately latched onto the red-headed boy, the one who'd killed Tabito and Washi effortlessly. 'Good, he'll be fun' the mad sound-nin thought. Stalking them through the mist, he took an exploratory swipe with this excellent sword he'd just found jammed into some dead guy's grave in the Wave Country. Feeling his blade pass through something, he inched forward. "Damn. Guess I shoulda swung at gut level". He shrugged, and eft the decapitated bodies of Natsume Naho and Nozara Yoritomo on the ground
Naruto's head perked up, smelling blood. "Go, now!" he whispered harshly to Konohamaru, then darted into the mist.
Ryobe, in the meantime, was almost sure he'd found the two who'd kill poor, stupid Konyo. Before he could reach them, someone darted past him, and someone landed a crushing kick into his ribs. A massive chakra flare, blew away much of the mist in the area, revealing the blonde kid who obviously was the leader. Looking over to the two he'd been going for, he saw the fat one who'd squashed Fujiko. A real shame too. He'd wanted to kill her himself. Returning his attention to the blonde kid, he bowed deeply. "Sekine Ryobe. Late of the Mist, currently of the Sound. A master swordsman and a literal ladykiller. Yourself?" he gave his introduction with a flourish at the end.
Naruto snorted and rubbed a thumb across the underside of his nose. "I'm Uzumaki Naruto, and I wanna know why the hell you have Zabuza's sword, asswipe!" The sword-wielding nin looked none-plussed for a moment, then began looking at his sword, and then Naruto.
"You serious? This was HIS sword? Momochi Zabuza was my freakin' idol when I was little! Oh man is this cool!" He rambled on about Zabuza for a few moments before refocusing. "Uzumaki Naruto, huh? Name don't mean crap to me"
Naruto grinned a darked version of his normal grin. "It should. I've defeated that wuss Kabuto, your lame-ass snake of a boss, and that bastard Sasuke!" A thoughtful look crossed Ryobe's face.
"Huh. Been wondering where wonder-boy went. Oh well. Guess I'll just kill you" he said, and readied Kiribiki Houcho.
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"Zettai-Kyoufushin" - Absolute Terror : A genjutsu developed by Nozara Yoritomo which renders the victim paralyzed by bombarding them with their worst fears, leaving them completely vulnerable to attack.
Don't cliffhangers suck? Well, I felt like it 'cause Bleach has returned to the 'very episode must end in a cliffhanger' tactic, and I felt that sharing my frustration was good. Anyway, please gimme some reviews, because feedback is great, and I'll keep pumping out the Naruto-y goodness! - Shun