A Typical Harry Potter Fanfic

by Anathema2

A parody of fanfic clichés everywhere. Don’t worry, I write this out of love. Mostly. If you have a problem with your heart, your back, or your sense of humor, you should not read this fic. Updated when possible. Chapter 6 up!

2. In Which There is Enough Foreshadowing

Title: A Typical Harry Potter Fanfic

Author: Anathema2

Summary: A parody of fanfic clichés everywhere. Don't worry, I write this out of love. Mostly.

Warnings: Irreverence, silliness, kleptomania, and criminal misuse of literary devices.

Disclaimer: I think it's obvious that I don't own these characters.

Author's note: Wow! I definitely didn't expect anyone to notice this tiny little fic...but you did! Yay, readers! dances I think I'm going to update this story every Wednesday, because it's my junior year, my classes are HARD, and my study habits...um...don't exist. If I updated more frequently than that, I would fail all of my classes, but if I waited any longer between updates, you would get tired of waiting and stop reading. This chapter's really short. Sorry.

Chapter 2: In Which There is Enough Foreshadowing to Stun a Werewolf

The Gryffindors' first class that day was Transfiguration with Professor McGonagall, who, due to a time warp, had grey hair, despite being thirty years younger than she was in the Harry Potter books.

"Hello," said McGonagall. "All of you should give me one Sickle, which is SILVER, because I like money."

Everyone gave McGonagall one SILVER Sickle except Remus, who counted out precisely twenty-nine Knuts. When McGonagall approached him with the collecting cauldron, Remus took one look at all the SILVER coins and swallowed hard. His throat swelled shut, his eyes began to water, and he passed out.

"No need to worry!" said McGonagall, searching Remus's pockets for valuables. "I'll take him up to the hospital wing. Potter, you teach the class." She shook James's hand, at the same time stealing his watch.

After classes, James, Sirius, and Peter went to visit Remus. "Hi, Remus!" Peter squeaked (as he always did). "Feeling better?"

"Yeah," Remus muttered, though he didn't fancy what he knew was coming next.

"We just came from Potions," Sirius said. "We learned to make one hell of a sleeping potion. The active ingredient is WOLFSBANE!"

"Wait," said James, confused. "Wasn't it MISTLETOE?"

"WOLFSBANE!"

"MISTLETOE!"

"WOLFSBANE!"

"MISTLETOE!"

"Stop it!" Remus snapped.

"Why? WOLFSBANE!"

"BECAUSE YOUR ARGUING IS GIVING ME A HEADACHE!" Remus shouted.

"I can't think of any more foreshadowing," said Peter glumly. "Rats!"

A/n: Haha! I love that line! And, of course, there's nothing cooler than klepto!McGonagall. If any of you brilliant readers have exciting ideas for future chapters, let me know. Thanks for reading, and I'll see you next week!