Title: A Typical Harry Potter Fanfic

Author: Anathema2

Summary: A parody of fanfic clichés everywhere. Don't worry, I write this out of love. Mostly.

Warnings: Irreverence, silliness, and cheap puns.

Disclaimer: If I owned these characters, I would be obscenely rich.

Author's Note: It's kinda been a while. Hi, guys.

I wanted to start by apologizing for the difficulties some people had with the most recent chapter. Apparently it was harder to read than I thought it would be, and not everyone seemed to understand that the spelling mistakes were intentional. (I thought that if the consistency with which I misspelled srius and Remsu's names didn't give it away, then "spell Czech" surely would have.) I do not apologize for writing the chapter, however, because I had so much fun writing it, and when I re-read it just now, I was giggling so much that my brother thought that the stress of college applications had caused my mind to snap.

Ooh, also, thanks for the reviews, love, and cookies. They were delicious.

Anyway, today I was supposed to be writing a college essay, but instead I wrote this. It's not really up to my usual standard (which, considering my usual standard, is quite a harsh statement), but it's pretty entertaining nonetheless. Enjoy.

Chapter 5: In Which There Are Some Siriusly Bad Puns

James was trying to look busy so that the author could write an opening sentence about whatever it was that he was doing. He unfortunately failed, and was given quite a stern lecture.

"James, my deer!" Sirius called, skipping down the corridor. They were in the corridor. That hasn't been mentioned yet, has it? Oh, darn.

James rolled his eyes. "That wasn't punny," he said irritably.

Sirius smiled endearingly. Just then, a rather familiar-looking Slytherin boy with white-blond hair swept by the two boys.

"As much as I hate that boy, I must say that he is one luscious Malfoy," said Lily, coming up behind James and Sirius.

"Hey, Lily!" James snickered. "Your name is Lily. Is your last name White? Because then you'd be Lily White! And that would be humorous!"

"Potter, you are ridiculous."

"Ridiculous?" James looked around. "Where's the boggart?"

"Honestly," Lily groaned. "Can't you ever be serious?"

"No," said James, grinning hugely. "He's Sirius!"

"Oh, seriously."

Sirius looked perplexed. "But my last name is Black, not Lee!"

Lily glared at the two boys. "I hate you both. I'm going to find srius and Remsu—at least they made conversation." She stormed off, muttering under her breath.

James frowned. "Who are srius and Remsu?"

"I don't know," Sirius said. "Oh, by the way, it's a full moon tonight."

James looked puzzled. "So?"

Sirius rolled his eyes. "So, It sounds like Remus might be in a bit of a hairy situation!"

"Um...Sirius?" James looked a bit uncomfortable. "We're only in first year. We don't know he's a werewolf yet."

"Really?"

"Yep."

"Damn."