Chapter 1: This Banal Existence
They say that time is multiplied in the young. That twenty years feels like a century. A month slows to the pace of a year. One hour can inch along, tricking the mind into believing a day has pass passed by. It had been twenty long and tedious years, and it felt like his life was over.
He was 40 years old and in his mind the better half of his life had been wasted on hundreds of no good teenagers who did not appreciate the finer art of what he had to say to them. Of what he could show them. They did not understand that the things he tried to teach them could lead them into everything a person could want to succeed in this world... But no... their eyes and ears tried only to retain what would give them a passing mark.
How he loathed them. and how they loathed him.
Severus opened his eyes. He knew the sun was shining outside. He could not see it... thanks to who ever ruled the afterlife, but he knew it was there. Taunting him... Dragging him out of his safe haven of black silk sheets and the deepest darkness.
Lying in his bed, he wondered why he bothered to wake himself up every morning. Why he still faced the awful brats who ruled his life. Yes, he was a teacher. He was their ruler... their master... Yet they controlled his every move. They did not know this though. He would simply die if they knew this. Walking into that dungeon room ever day brought him back 25 years before when the fathers and mothers of these torturous kids had brought to life every unimaginable hell for Severus.
He groaned into a pillow. His hell would begin again today in one hour. Then tomorrow, it would begin all over again. He could not escape. He had nothing to look forward to. This was his life. His living nightmare. And he never could figure out just how to wake himself up.
IIII
Climbing out of the shower she grabbed a soft, terrycloth towel and wrapped it around her small body. Another day, another bad dream that she'd never make her way out of. Every day was the same. Wake up, shower, eat, go to class, do pages of homework, then back to bed. This was her existence.
She longed for something more. Something that would set her apart from all the other clones. In her world... the one that only she could be in... the one where she imagined every right word, every perfect glance... she was queen. Nobody spoke down to her. Nobody spoke to her only for her knowledge... for her truths.
She stared at her reflection in the mirror. Watched as her face faded and she became just a disappointing blur. How she hated it... all of it. She hoped she'd be pretty in someone's eyes. But how could she be something that she wasn't even in her own eyes?
Oh well.
Hermione thought. Onward to another day of suffering.
IIII
"Another morning.. another failed test. Parchment out- You are late Ms. Granger... Take your seat..." Severus Snape said as his eyes fell focused on the brunette that had just ran abruptly into his class room and took a seat next to Harry Potter.
Hermione threw her books on the table and sat gingerly next to Harry. The pause to catch her breath have her time to think.
A pop quiz? Professor Snape never gives- her thoughts were momentarily interrupted by a ominous source standing above her.
"Excuse me Miss Granger, but do you really think you will get away with being five minutes late without even an apology?" His voice was like an ice cube rolling slowly down her back.
"No sir." She expelling the same iciness. "I'm so-" She could not bring herself to lie. She was not sorry for being late. For once her schedule had been altered (if only for five minutes) and it felt so good... so freeing.
"Although, I know, that apology would have been heartfelt and sincere, it will not cut it. Five points from Gryffindor for wasting five minutes of class. And I do believe a Saturday detention for lack of caring is in order." He smirked his most Slytherin smile as he whipped around back to the front of the classroom.
This was feeling less and less freeing by the minute, she decided, as she pulled a piece of parchment from her bag.
IIII
"That was cruel, Hermione. I'm really sorry."
"Oh its fine, Harry, really." She said as they walked to Transfiguration together. "Just because its another smidge on my record, doesn't mean a thing." She said through gritted teeth.
"Oh, its not so bad. There is a first for everything." Ron Weasley said smiling.
"And you... so chipper? Did Fred and George send you some more paint quills for you to sniff?" Hermione asked him sarcastically.
"As a matter of fact, yes. But that is not why I am so 'Chipper'." Ron said smiling maliciously.
"Oh really? Are you going to tell me? Or must I interrogate Harry next?"
Harry put his arms up in a mock cross, "Stay back! I'm outta this one!"
Ron laughed and swung his arm around Hermione's shoulders. "This is why I can't stop smiling." He held a piece of parchment to her face. She took it and read it carefully.
"It isn't?" She asked skeptically, "Really!" Ron nodded his head enthusiastically. "Now, Ron... be completely honest!" Harry scolded.
"Alright. Alright." Ron said, his smile wavering slightly. "Last Hogsmeade visit, I snuck over to the Three Broomsticks, and I applied for a summer job at Madam Rosmerta's. That's the real reason she mailed me that note asking me to come by. I kind of got hired." He smiled sheepishly.
"That's wonderful. Except, don't get your hopes up. She really is much too old for you." Hermione said smiling concernedly at Ron.
"Well, even so! I can use the money!" Ron said defensively as they approached their seats in Mcgonagall's classroom.
IIII
She ran her finger down the checklist. (Yes, she had a checklist) To make sure she had done everything before going to sleep. She mentally checked off each to-do and realized she no longer needed the paper. After six long years at Hogwarts, she'd long ago memorized it. It all had become second nature.
Oh well. She thought. I really don't want to forget anything. So she'd continue to do it.
Finally, after realizing she'd done everything she approached her large empty bed. It was soft, yes, but somewhere in her mind she saw it as unwelcoming. Who wanted to crawl into a bed with the sheets tightly pulled and tucked into all four corners? The only thing bright was the Gryffindor scarlet comforter.
Once she pulled back the blanket and slid in, she waved her wand to turn off the lights. Her head girl bedroom was small and homey. Yet, quiet in the late darkness. She pulled the blanket up to her chin and rolled over onto her side.
She wondered what it would be like to have a man lie next to her and wrap his comforting arms around her in the dark.
IIII
he held her tightly. He loved the way it felt to feel her softness pressed against his hardness. He softly rubbed his hand in a slow circle up and down her back.
She found this action so comforting. She wrapped her arms around his neck and let his scent tickle her nose. He smelt of ocean-scented soap she decided. The scent registered some where in the back of her memory.
He placed his hand on the small of her back and began to rock, slowly swaying in a dance without music. She let her eyes drift closed as she pressed her face to his shoulder.
She smiled at the simplicity of it all.
It feels so wonderful. They both thought simultaneously.
She opened her eyes and tipped her head up to look at his face. His eyes grazed down towards her face.
For the first time their eyes locked.
IIII
Hermione sat bolt upright in her bed. How... How... How could she have been dreaming such a beautiful, tender dream about that MONSTER!
IIII
In another part of the castle, in the deeper dungeons, Severus Snape sat gasping for breath.
This is all too much, he thought. Hermione Granger had invaded his dream space, and for a moment... he had liked it.