I woke up in an uncomfortable bed with itchy covers. Well, maybe that was harsh. Considering I'd spent a small fortune on the room, the service and facilities were rather kingly in comparison to the other rooms available, but their kingliness was drastically outshined by my old room in the Pendragon's manor. I missed that room.
Forcing the unpleasant memory from my head, I got up and set about getting ready for the day.
I cleaned myself up, pulled my clothes clothes on, and secured my nifty new bag to its place on my hip.
Once ready, I stared at the door to my room for a solid five seconds. I had no idea what to do with myself.
Sighing, I fell back down on my rented bed and stared blankly at the ceiling.
Everything just seemed so pointless. All of the friends I'd ever had, few as they were, were likely dead or dying and I was in an entirely different world prancing about winning elementary level duels.
Creasing my eyebrows in concentration, I focused on the feeling I'd had right when I'd used Sil Du's power to absorb the tether connecting me to Ddraig and tried to replicate the power that sent me careening uncontrollably through the space between planes.
I felt something stir in the depths of my being, but it was muted, far away. Growling in exertion, I did everything I could to fan the flames, forcing my magic towards where I felt that simmering ember of power, my mind focused on the Pendragon estate as I tried desperately to will myself there.
With an enraged exclamation, I let my brimming power fade.
Something was wrong. I couldn't reignite my spark. Was this just a one-time thing then, or did severing my connection with Ddraig throw everything out of whack? Maybe I'd accidentally absorbed my spark into Sil Du while I was sucking up Ddraig's connection to me. If that was the case, I would be trapped here forever, never able to even learn if my friends were dead or alive.
Were it not for the distraction entering the hotel I was staying in, I likely would have laid there all day wallowing. As it was, I forced myself to my feet and opened my door just as my spirit informed me someone was about to knock.
"The fact that you're following me isn't going to make me open up to you. In fact, it's rather off putting and suspicious. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go check out of this hotel room and find a new one." I said to the woman in front of me.
Nymphadora was frozen with her fist raised towards the door in a position as if she was about to knock. Her mouth opened to say something but I blazed right past her. The fact that she'd sought out my room meant that the sacrificial Cthulhu cult theory was seeming more and more likely.
"Hey!" she cried indignantly as she raced down the hall after me. "I'm not up to anything. I just wanted to ask you to breakfast. You said you were new in town, so I thought I could show you-"
"I'm just going to stop you right there." I said, stopping in front of her and holding up a hand. "If you keep this up I'll put the magical equivalent of a restraining order on you. Your magical laws have something like that, right?"
"Um… we have something similar in the-"
"Good. Then I'll do whatever that is. Now have a good day, and leave me alone." I started walking away only to turn around and say, "I'm ninety percent certain I know the answer, but just to check: Did you find me through magical means or did you pay off the staff of the hotel?"
"The second one." Nymphadora said, blinking in confusion.
"That's what I thought." I seriously doubted anyone in this world had the power to obtain information about me through my wards, but I wasn't going to let arrogance be the end of me. "Have a good day." I said again, turning back around and leaving the magical police officer to stare at my back.
After quickly checking out of the hotel and harassing the manager until they gave me my money back, I'd paid them extra to forget I was here which obviously didn't work out that well for me, I walked into the street and, lacking anything better to do, started looking for a place to eat.
I ducked into the first place I found, a little cafe tucked between two large clothing stores, and ordered an omelet.
When I was halfway through my meal, my spirits warned me of someone approaching, prompting me to sigh. I really should have told that bookie to take me off the competitor's list. The prize money was nice, but my sanity was not worth it.
"Can I help you?" I asked the man smiling down at me.
The elderly man had a mane of grey hair accompanied by a beard that fell down past his shoulders. He was wearing a grey-blue robe and a simple cap of the same color. His eyes twinkled from behind half-circle spectacles as he said, "Is this seat taken?" as he motioned to the empty seat across from me.
"That depends on who you're with." I said non committedly. "Are you a part of the same Cthulhu resurrection cult as the shape changing woman?"
The old man blinked in confusion as he said, "I can assure you I have no interest in summoning fictional, eldritch monstrosities to our world if that is truly your concern."
"But you knew what I was talking about. That alone tells me a lot." I said as I suspiciously eyed the old man.
"Yes, I did. While most wizards do not spend their time partaking in the fictional stories of muggles, I have read some of Lovecraft's stories."
"You guys have Lovecraft here? Nice." That meant there were probably other similarities which was a bit of a relief, but Lovecraft's monsters, or at least the inspiration for them, were far from fictional.
"We seem to have strayed from our original topic, I was asking if I may sit with you." The man skillfully pulled the conversation back to the seating issue I'd been trying to distract him from.
"It's a free country." I said in acceptance.
"I beg your pardon?" the old man asked, confused.
"Oh, right. I'm in Britain. Yes, you can sit." I said to clarify.
"So the papers were correct that you come from across the pond?" he said as he sat down with a fluidity most men his age sorely lacked.
"Something like that. Now not to be rude, but who are you and what do you want?"
"Ah! I have forgotten my manners. My name is Albus Dumbledore. I am here because I wished to meet you. Overnight you have risen from an unknown entity to a national icon. It is quite impressive."
Dumbledore. Now that was a name I recognized. He was Harry's father figure and mentor, right? Oh, that meant he would die at some point. The mentor always died.
"Good to meet you." I said politely. "I'm Xarion, though I'm guessing you already knew that since you sought me out. Now that you've met me, was there anything else?" It wasn't that he was being annoyingly insistent like Nymphodora, I just wanted nothing to do with the plot. I'd seen how that particular path ended, and I didn't want to blow this world up like I did DXD.
"If I may, what do you intend to do now that you have come to Britain? You've made quite the splash. Do you intend to take advantage of that or return home?"
This line of questioning was straying in a direction that led me to believe Dumbledore felt threatened…. no, more apprehensive of me. What did I do to rock his boat?
"Honestly, I have no idea. I didn't exactly come here with a plan in mind and I ended up in the tournament by accident. None of what has happened to me has been planned." I said honestly, withholding any and all context.
I felt a foreign presence brush against my mind and batted it away with the force of an oncoming freight train.
"Try that again, and this meeting will become significantly less cordial." I growled at the old man as he flinched back, both surprised I'd caught him and reeling from the spike of pain I'd sent into his head in retaliation. His mental barriers were surprisingly strong, but not good enough to keep me out if I was actually trying. The stab was to let him know that, and to get him to stop trying to screw with me.
If nothing else, this encounter had told me that mind mages were a thing in this universe. That was useful information.
"You have my most sincere apologies." Dumbledore quickly said, giving me a nod of apology. "It is a poor habit of mine that I have yet to get a handle on."
"Try harder." I said, not buying his innocent act.
"I assure you, I will endeavor to do so in the future."
"Was that everything you wanted to discuss?" I said, pointedly taking a large bite of my omelet. It was surprisingly good considering I just walked into the first place I'd stumbled across.
Dumbledore didn't answer for a moment, his intelligent eyes boring into my own.
Seemingly making a decision about something, the old man smiled. "Would you be averse to teaching Defense Against the Dark Arts at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry?"
My fork, laden with my next bite of omelet, froze halfway to my mouth as I looked up at Dumbledore with my eyes. "Come again?"
"Hogwarts finds itself lacking a Defense teacher this upcoming school year. As you stated you do not have any plans, I thought it a good opportunity to present you with the option to join my staff." he explained easily, his eyes twinkling once more; that had to be an illusion of some sort.
Putting my fork back down on my plate, I stared uncomprehendingly at Dumbledore as I tried to figure out if he was crazy. "I think now would be a good time to mention that I have no teaching qualifications of any kind. I think it would also be important to remind you I'm a foreigner who appeared yesterday and should, in no way shape or form, be trusted around your children. With all of that said, would you like to rescind your offer?"
"On the contrary, I believe you would be a remarkable fit for the position. Your showing in the most recent Dueler's Cup assures me you are more than capable enough to hold the position, and, seeing as you currently lack any form of employment if my guess is correct, it would be a good opportunity for you as well. The possibility exists for us to help each other, so I believe it prudent to do so Mr….?"
"Xarion." I said, stalling for time as I tried to wrap my head around this crazy man's proposal. "I don't have a last name."
Dumbledore pursed his lips thoughtfully. "You are an orphan then? I apologize, I had not been told. Now, to my proposition, what do you think?"
Blinking to get my brain to start processing information again, I quickly ran through everything I could recall of the Harry Potter world. "Mr. Dumbledore-"
"Please call me Albus, Xarion."
"Albus, while I will admit my research into your school is less than extensive, I think I have just solved one of your greatest issues."
With a curious tilt to his head, Albus said, "And what would that be?"
"In the span of three years, your school has played host to a cerberus that almost ate students, a basilisk that petrified a number of the student body and a contingent of dementors whose presence threatened the very souls of those in your charge." I listed off, using all the spotty storylines I could recall from my memory to try to drive my point home. "Has it occurred to you that these problems could potentially stem from your lax recruitment standards in regards to your staff?"
Dumbledore's entire demeanor changed from intrigued to what I could only refer to as 'stumped'. "That is an interesting perspective worth investigating I suppose." he conceded.
"Glad we straightened that out." I said as I shoveled more omelet into my mouth.
"Perhaps once you arrive at the start of the semester we can go create a list of adequate criteria to measure an applicant's aptitude." Dumbledore said as he rose from his seat.
Waving absentmindedly at him, I said, "Have fun with tha…. Wait, we?" I turned to face him and saw his eyes twinkling down at me.
"The Semester begins on the first of September. Please ensure you arrive no later than the twentieth of August to allow yourself time to prepare for classes. Your signing bonus will be sent to you forthwith."
"Hold the fuck up! I didn't sign anything and I have better things to do than sit around with a bunch of snot-nosed-"
Dumbledore deposited a fifty euro note onto the table in front of me. "For your breakfast, my friend. Please do get a handle on your profanity prior to your arrival. It would not do to set a poor example for the children."
"Hey!" I yelled, standing up from my seat to stare down Dumbledore. "I am not interested in working at your school. Keep your sign on bonus and any other bribe you'd think to give me. I'm not-"
"Teachers are, of course, permitted to make use of Hogwarts' multitude of resources including our extensive library, state of the art potion making equipment, runecrafting materials and much more. Would that perhaps interest you?"
The library and potion bit gave me pause. I had always wanted to learn how to make potions, but Azazel didn't have anyone who could make anything greater than an elixir to reduce pain, and an entire library's worth of otherworldly magic would make any Dimir mage think twice.
"You conniving old coger." I said from behind narrowed eyes.
Dumbledore just gave me his brightest smile. "Then I shall see you near the end of the month! Please prepare a lesson plan to encompass the education of both Hogwarts students and those of Durmstrang and Beauxbatons. Hogwarts will be playing host to our friends this year."
My eyes widened as I recognized the event from my memory. "Hang on I didn't agree to-"
Dumbledore's form spiralled down to the size of a quarter and he disappeared with a pop.
Did I just get press-ganged into being a highschool teacher?
X
Yes.
Yes, I had been press-ganged into being a highschool teacher.
A single day after I'd met Dumbledore an owl appeared out of nowhere with a package for me. Inside was a bag filled with golden coins and a document signed by Dumbledore outlining my new position as Hogwarts' Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher.
Apparently in this horribly inefficient and unjust society only the employer had to sign documentation confirming someone's admittance into an occupation. That very same employer was also able to create a list of consequences to come into effect immediately upon the failure of the employee to live up to said contract. While Dumbledore's conditions weren't terrible, just a forfeit of any earnings and a mark against my record that would keep me from ever being hired anywhere in Britain ever again, I still wasn't willing to just brush them off.
So it was with no small amount of soreness that I made the journey to Hogwarts.
It wasn't all bad, and I was actually starting to see this as a positive. For the entire time I'd been in the castle I'd avoided the other professors who were responsibly preparing to teach the incoming small humans and buried myself in the library to absorb everything from it that I could.
Within the shelves were tomes detailing various magical theories, how to raise and care for potion ingredients and even a surprisingly large quantity of spells. According to the books, all of the spells required wands to perform, but I found that after spending a short time to develop a spell circle for any given spell in the library, l was able to reverse engineer them to be cast without a wand, extending my spell library by a staggering amount.
Unfortunately, all of the books I'd found on potioncraft were vague and unhelpful at best, and downright incomprehensible at worst. If I wished to progress at all in that area, I would likely need to work out a deal with Severus Snape, the dark haired potions master of the school.
During my brief time here, I'd also gone searching for one of the things that had always stuck out to me as interesting about Harry Potter while I was still in my first life - a fact that was likely why I was able to remember it even now - the Room of Requirement.
The loss of Sil Du was still weighing on me. I felt naked without the blade, and while I doubted I'd ever be able to fashion something like it again, the Room of Requirement likely had what I needed to forge a blade that, while not its equal, could serve as its replacement. Unfortunately, I'd yet to find the room. All I really remembered was that to gain entrance you had to think about what you needed while walking past it, but I didn't know where it was specifically, and Hogwarts was massive. By the time students arrived, I still had yet to find the room, but I would stick with it until I did. There were only so many places it could be even in a gargantuan castle.
I idly sipped some water out of my wine glass - I had no idea why I was given a wine glass, but it held water well enough so I didn't complain - as I watched the Hogwarts students file into the hall and take their seats at their respective tables. Some looked bored, some excited and some disbelieving as they beheld the shifting clouds and floating candles in the ceiling of the chamber.
I had to admit, as much as I grumbled on my way here, I was actually really impressed with this place. The protective wards were subpar and almost elementary compared to what I was used to, but the gaudy enchantments were over the top and amusing. I got the sense that wizards here cared less about function than they did about theatrics and aesthetic. I was the opposite, of course, but I could still appreciate a floating candle or two from time to time.
"So our illusive, newest professor finally shows his face." the woman sitting next to me said in a hard voice as she sized me up, her wild grey hair waving in the air.
I choked on my water as she addressed me, the words she used pulling unpleasant memories to the forefront of my mind.
"Are you alright, man?" she asked, leaning over worriedly.
I waved her off as I got my hacking under control. "I'm fine. Not your fault. Not to be rude, but who are you?"
She grinned at me. "Maybe you'd know everyone already if you'd bothered to show up for a meeting or two."
"I was supposed to go to meetings? Why wasn't that in my contract?" I asked as I leaned back to glare at Dumbledore where he was addressing the school in the center of the teacher's table. I swear I felt a pinch of amusement wafting off of the man.
"Didn't you get a schedule?" the woman to my left asked with a raised eyebrow, completely tuning out Dumbledore's speech as I was. I decided for no other reason than that I liked her.
"There were schedules, too?"
She barked out a short laugh. "Well I'm glad to see you're showing your new position the respect it's due." she said as she held out her hand. "Rolanda Hooch. I teach flying and coach the Quidditch teams."
"Xarion. No last name. Apparently I'm going to be teaching a bunch of kids how to not get killed by magic." I said as I shook her hand.
The woman retracted her hand with a disappointed look in her eye. "You have no idea what you're doing, do you?"
"Nope." I confirmed. "I wouldn't be here if Dumbledore hadn't signed me up for the position without telling me about it first. I'm going to do my best, but I did tell him he should've hired someone who was, oh I don't know? Qualified?"
Rolanda shrugged, turning her attention back to the students as she said, "Well at least you're honest. Out of the last three professors in your position only one was qualified while the other two bumbled ahead pretending they knew what they were doing."
"Well, I can't speak to my teaching abilities as I have literally never taught anyone anything magic related in my life, but I'm one of the most devastating magical fighters I know, and I'm rather good at not getting myself killed by magic, so I'm sure I can find something to impart." Here. I was one of the most devastating magical fighters I knew here. Also there was that one time I'd started to teach Vali to forge but he'd….
I missed Vali.
"No offense, but I hope you get fired and someone else fills in for you. Too many of our students are already behind where they should be because they had two incompetent teachers back to back."
"None taken." I assured her. "If I were in your shoes, I'd probably feel the same."
The doors to the chamber were suddenly opened as a parade of young women in elegant blue outfits literally danced their way into the room. Illusory butterflies fluttered off of their body as they contorted and twisted, leaping and doing dance moves I didn't know the name of.
"What's happening?" I whispered, leaning over to Hooch.
The woman sighed dejectedly, I got the sense she didn't like me very much, but she ignored Dumbledore's speech so she was still on my 'Alright' list. "If you had been paying attention to the headmaster you'd know that these are the students Beauxbatons has sent for the Triwizard Tournament. Durmstrang has arrived as well and will be along shortly."
Oh, so she had been listening to Dumbledore. She was no longer on my 'Alright' list.
"Got it. Thanks." I said quickly as Dumbledore led a ginormous woman towards our table by the hand. She was easily over nine feet tall and built like an amazon.
"Damn." I said, only to be smacked on the arm by Hooch as she seemed to be getting ever more irritated with me.
"Language." she said in a scathing tone.
I just shrugged and leaned back in my chair. If she was determined to dislike me, I wasn't going to waste any energy stopping her. I would do my job to the best of my abilities and use Hogwarts to increase my own strength. Outside of that, I didn't give two shits about anything else.
The doors opened once more, this time slamming against the wall as they were thrown wide. A procession of hard-faced young men with long sticks marched into the room. Sparks flew from their staves as the new arrivals slammed them into the ground and spun them in circles that left magical afterimages in their wake.
I wasn't impressed. I'd seen the first moments of a battle between two Super Devils. Those two were moving so fast that the space around them began to fold and crack, completely disregarding any actual, not magical, afterimages they left behind.
A man in a thick white coat walked up to Dumbledore and the two pulled each other into a hug. He must have been the guy in charge of the other guys.
"Now, Hogwarts!" Dumbledore called as the man took an empty seat at the teacher's table. "Let us give our friends a true Hogwarts welcome!"
Every single Hogwarts student in the hall, along with many of the teachers, stood up as words carved from blazing letters rose into the air above Dumbledore. What followed was the single most atrocious display of off-key singing and kindergarten-tier arm waving I had ever been forced to suffer through. It just kept going, and going. They sang for so long that I actually cast a silencing spell over my ears to block everything out.
When it was finally over, the students from the other two schools clapped with ghastly expressions on their faces, more applauding the fact that it was over than the act itself.
Undoing my silencing spell as the students sat back down, I caught the tail end of Dumbledore saying something about rule changes before the room shook under the power of a thunderbolt.
"Ooo!" I said as I looked up at the electrical storm in the ceiling, rain falling down to land comfortingly on my cheeks. "This place is awesome!"
It was then I realized that a lot of students were shrieking in terror and the proffessors were darting around like a schol of frenzied piranhas.
"Is this not supposed to happen?" I asked Hooch as she stood from her chair.
"No, you imbecile!"
Well that was rude and uncalled for. She was now on my 'Do Not Like' list.
Shrugging the comment off as I decided to just fix the problem, I held a hand towards the ceiling without leaving my chair. A blue spell circle blazed to life before my hand and a beam of violet energy shot out of it as I tested out one of the new spells I'd acquired from the library.
The electrical storm quickly faded as the ceiling transformed into a sunny utopia.
Smiling contentedly to myself, I leaned back in my chair. I felt the presence of hundreds if not thousands of pairs of eyes on me and looked up to see everyone, student and teacher both, staring disbelievingly at me.
"What? I stopped the rain, didn't I?" Some people just didn't know how to show gratitude.
I looked down and my eyes lit up. "Muffins!" I picked up one of the blueberry muffins that had magically appeared on my plate and bit into it, savoring my treat as Dumbledore regained control of the hall and started talking about the tournament.
At least the house elves knew how to say thank you. I'd need to complement them on their baking skills the next time I saw them.