Disclaimer: I do not own Buffy. I'm just having fun with the series, so please don't sue. I DON'T HAVE MONEY!!!!

Author's Note: I love Buffy and I think it is one of the best series on television. I'm just having fun here due to boredom.

Season Three

Buffy and Joyce hugs at the end of the first episode.

(me just waking up): What happened? Oh well. (goes back to sleep)

FAITH (wearing leather pants): Hi, I'm Faith.

(me): She's evil! (Faith kills a vampire.) Oh, wait, she's a Slayer.

That ancient vampire with Mr. Trick appears on the screen.

(me): This one is uglier than that Master guy.

Angel comes back naked.

(me): Now that's entertainment! (I go on drooling.)

Giles and Joyce out stealing.

(me): So that's what adults are like in their teens. (shake my head) Those poor 70s policemen.

SPIKE: Home sweet home.

Willow and Xander are caught kissing.

(me): What did they expect, cheering and smiles all around?

Buffy as the rogue Slayer, kicking ass.

(me): Now that's what I call kicking ass. (Buffy gets killed by the Master) There goes my role model.

FIRST EVIL: You have no idea what you're dealing with.

Angel tries to kill himself, but saved by snow.

(me): It doesn't snow in southern California. (thinks for a moment) Finally global warming is doing something good.

Faith kills a human.

(me): I told you she was evil. The leather pants never fail.

Angel kissing Faith.

(me): They had sex?!

FAITH (on Mayor Wilkins): Come graduation day, he's getting paid.

(me): I thought being the Mayor is a paying job.

FAITH: What can I say? I'm the world's best actor.

ANGEL: Second best.

(me): Now I'm seriously confused. (after a second) Oh well, at least Angel is back on the home team.

XANDER: I'm still having trouble with the fact that one of us is just going to gun everybody down for no reason.

(me): Obviously, he doesn't read the news.

Buffy and Angel's sewer talk.

(me): Great place to get dumped. (then I sulk for the rest of the series.) (Sorry, I'm a loyal B/A fan.)

Buffy stabs Faith who jumps into a moving truck. The next thing I know, Faith is in hospital.

(me): How did she get there?

Angel sucking Buffy's blood.

(me): This has too much sexual intention in it. (I get up and left for a split second before coming back to watch the rest of the season.)

The whole library blowing up.

(me): I wish I went to a school like that. Yeah! No school!