Warning: OOC, Intense Make-Outs, Crack Pairings, and Interspecies PDA.
Kissing on the Carnival in Rio de Janeiro
A/N: "To those who think we are disgusting, this is for you." - Princess Elise III of Soleanna
That night, the celebration was in full effect. Sonic and Elise were standing together with their friends atop the float's decorated platform as the truck towed them across the Marvellous City's festive Sambadrome in the annual Carnival parade. Louie's monkeys were broadcasting the entire party; there was even a camera on the float's platform.
The camera operator caught the exact moment when the princess lifted up the hedgehog to give him a hug, after which, they leaned forth, their arms never letting go of the other. Kissing one another rather passionately, hungrily tasting each other's tongue as the two twisted and twirled together in a furious kiss, Elise forcing her drool down his throat while Sonic sucked on her tongue.
"Let's share it all!" Cheered the orangutan offscreen. "With a kiss."
The princess took a handful of his blue quills, slithering her tongue in his mouth to explore each and every nook and cranny of the small area.
"A kiss from a friend." He continued as the camera focused on the couple making out. "A kiss between two people who are very fond of each other in a completely platonic way."
Sonic moaned when she drove her thick appendage down his throat as her hand moved to his butt, squeezing it hard. Their tongues moved in hungry swirls and back-and-forth motions,
"Sonic, Elise. Moment of pure, wholesome emotion on your television."
They kept going at it. Shifting their grips, dancing with their lips in perfect syntony, and the princess even dipping down as she and hedgehog lost themselves. The camera captured their public display of affection from different angles.
"The background music matching seamlessly with the scene; an eruption of love."
Finally, the others (who were too busy whistling at the couple) decided to intervene. Separating the two now panting and flustered kissers. Sonic and Elise turned to wave at the onlookers on the bleachers.
Cat Lady
Miss Dinah Two-Shoes arrived home later that night from her evening in the Lucky Seven Saturday Night Bridge Club. The middle-aged woman of mid-stature opened the door and marched across her trashed house, courtesy of her 'mouse-catcher's' insane antics. She didn't pay any mind to the mayhem around her, nor did she reduce the speed of her pace; her mind was only focused on finding the one she knew was responsible for the mess. She came into the kitchen, opened the fridge, and sure enough, there he was: Thomas 'Tom' Cat, her plain, old grey pussycat, covered in food and sporting a long face.
The moment he noticed her, his expression turned grave and he gulped when she grabbed him by the neck, brought her close to her scowl, and spoke in a fuming voice. "You're coming with me, you no-good cat!"
Jerry peeked from the pantry in time to see the furious house owner drag Tom away, no doubt trembling to unleash her fury on him. With the kitchen all to himself, the mouse took this chance to finally enjoy a good midnight snack.
Dinah held the cat by the neck with her meaty hands as she opened the door to her room before tossing him to her makeup stand; she proceeded to pin him to the mirror and shouted at him with the fury of a thousand suns. "Now listen here, you fur coat! If I hear a single peep about what happened last night-"
"Heavens no, Boss Lady!" Tom exclaimed in horror while shaking his head wildly. "I'm not telling another soul. I would sooner swallow my own tongue if someone found out!" The cat swore. "What happened between us yesterday will be kept just between us."
"It better." She hissed. "'Cause if it gets out, you're out of this house. And when I say 'Out,' Thomas, I mean 'Out!' O-U-T, out!"
"Y-yes, ma'am." The feline panted, eyeing her large bust moving up and down as she berated him.
"You'll get the boot." She emphasized before stopping to catch her breath too.
After the tomcat nodded his head, the only sound in the room came from the music playing from the record and the collective wheezing of the cat and the woman.
"Got that, right?" Dinah asked between her gasps for air.
"Yes, ma'am." He responded, his eyes now glued to her face.
"Good." She averted his gaze for a second before turning to him again. "Now to make things clear here- Mph!"
Dinah was silenced when the cat lurched forward and caught her in a passionate lip-lock, wrapping an arm around her neck. At that exact moment, a piece of romantic music picked on the record. She slowly closed her eyes as she enveloped his back with her strong arms, kissing back and bringing him in for a tight yet passionate embrace. Just like last night. Her hands painted with red polish came down to scoop him off the makeup stand while he reached up for her red polka dot bandana. The rotund house owner now cuddled him closer to her bosom, not caring about the liberal amounts of jewelry she wore. She started spinning, 'dancing' in the room with the pussycat. Tom sneaked his paws inside her blue dress, massaging as much as he could of her dark brown chocolate skin. Dinah pinned him to the wall as they continued heatedly making out.
I Saw My Cousin Kissing Santa Claus
"Lights... Camera... Action!"
There was a sound of rustling coming from the fireplace. Ashes, soot, and a 'thud' fell down the chimney to announce the arrival of St. Nicholas himself. Getting off the fireplace, he approached his 'special' visit for the night.
Standing right in front of him, was the beautiful form of Melanie Spankenheimer, called Cousin Mel by her relatives. The redhead was wearing a sexy hula dress, baring her midriff, and a fur bikini top. Santa's eyes were so fixated in her form, that he completely looked past the scowl adorning her beautiful face as she stared at him, same to her crossed arms.
"F###### seriously, dude?!" Mel said in her slightly southern accent, breaking the fourth wall to complain to the director. "I have to kiss this old man again?! I already kissed him last week, now I have to do it again? Not cool! I don't like it. I don't take any pleasure in doing that!"
King Louie coughed a "bullcrap" from his spot in the director's chair. It wasn't like he told her to use her tongue in her last kissing scene with Claus. Rising his megaphone, he called to Melanie: "And if I go there?"
"No!" The way she answered so quickly earned a few laughs from the others in the studio, including Mel's younger cousin Jake, who was in position creeping down the stairs for the scene.
"He's got milk breath." She complained.
"Yeah, but that is what makes the kiss so special." Was the only thing she got from the orangutan.
There were no more arguments on Mel's part, further convincing Louie that she wasn't so hesitant about doing this as she tried to convince everyone she was. Mel and Santa Claus came to stand underneath the mistletoe. The gold-digger moved the old man's snowy white beard out of the way of her upcoming lips, holding it while she put her hand on his cheek. Mel leaned him and kissed Santa Claus right on the mouth, their puckers rubbing against each other. The camera's zoom grabbed the exact moment she opened her mouth, revealing her hidden smile, and inserted her tongue inside. Again, that part was optional. When she closed her mouth again, their lip-pock was lost in Santa's beard. Jake peeked from the stairs, watching the entire thing from a vantage point just outside the reach of the cameras. Santa moved a hand towards her back, but Mel intercepted and moved it for him to grab her large butt through her dress. He put another arm around her back, bringing her curvy body and his large belly together, and deepening the kiss. Mel maintained her hands clasped to his fat cheekbones, tickling his beard in the process.
Cousin Mel came out of that kiss wearing a silly jolly grin on her face.
An Ape Suitor for Ann
"Hang on now, folks from the Labyrinth crowd!" King Louie swoop in front of the camera. "Take it easy, slow it down. Relax, get yourself unwind." He rhymed before standing on one arm and pointing to himself with three opposable thumbs. "It's me, Louie, King sublime; I'm here on the island with a friend of mine." He then pointed to the woman making her way offscreen. "A round of applause for Ann Darrow!"
Ann appeared onscreen, wearing a white dress, and her short blonde hair was curled, stopping at her shoulders. Her figure was slender and her skin fair. The actress's bright blue eyes shimmered like her smile.
"Ann here is single and looking for the perfect partner; that's why we are here on Skull Island," Louie explained before gesturing to the pristine beach where the land meets the Pacific Ocean, a series of stone reefs adorned the continental shelf.
"I'm looking for the perfect Alpha Male for myself." Ann addressed the audience. "Am I gonna find him here?"
Louie beamed. "Let's find out."
Louie and Ann's quest through the Crumbling Coast to find the most powerful partner for the latter led them to have an audition with King Kong, the ruler of Skull Island, and the last of his species Megaprimatus Kong.
"So, your Majesty. I'm here trying to find a partner, a true Alpha Male." Ann explained her situation to the monarch as she eyed him up and down, clearly pleased by what she was seeing. "And I can see that you are a big hairy ape."
Despite his kind having evolved from the Gigantopithecus, the Megaprimatus Kong resembled an adult silverback western lowland gorilla. Most of the King's body was covered in thick, matted black hair. The crescent-shaped scar on his right eye, and the tooth jutting out from his lower jaw, gave him the appearance of being both old and battle-hardened.
"Well, I'm single." The great ape responded as he grinned while admiring the blonde actress in front of him. Safe to say their feelings were mutual. "Perhaps."
That was when Louie barged in with a mic in hand. "Can I start? Eye to eye." He instructed them, and the pair obliged. "One... two... three!"
'FART'
The sound flatulence cut the air the moment Louie put the mic near his backside, breaking the atmosphere between the couple as well, much to their chagrin.
"Come on, guys, do it!" The orangutan told them, his lips tugging in the form of a mischievous smile.
"Seriously? You just ruined the mood.!" Exclaimed the now embarrassed and slightly frustrated actress. She then shook her head before turning back to the gorilla. "Oh, screw it."
Ann put her arm over Kong's shoulder the exact moment she opened her mouth to meet his pucker, kissing him deeply. They pulled back, revealing their tongues licking one another along with their smiles before their lips meet once more for a make-out session. The actress put her arm around the ape's shoulder while they lingered into their kiss. She came forth, leaning on his strong physique and wrapping her other arm around the King's neck as his bíceps coiled on her back, fully embracing each other. Their lips would occasionally separate but their tongues did not, licking the other's mouths before going back inside to hungrily join together again. When they finally separated, Ann couldn't resist kissing the sides of Kong's face and giving him one last powerful smooch, bopping her nose with his snout.
King Louie cheered the couple on as the great ape carried the squealing actress bridal style and ran with her deeper into the island.
My Beautiful Black Stallion
"Ladies and gentlemen, it's time for...!" Barney Stinson trailed off, offering the microphone to the crowd in front of the stage.
"Lackluster Pick-Up Lines!" The bystanders responded energetically.
A handsome black horse walked from between the males to Barney's side. The host addressed him. "What is your name?"
"Black Beauty." He responded.
"I heard some folks on the crowd telling you to get on the stage, who are they?" Barney questioned, pointing to the herd of stallions in the crowd neighing in root for Beauty.
"My best friends." The young black stallion smiled.
"That's a bunch of friends you got there, pal." Commented the Casanova.
Cue the last verses of MLP's intro. 'Friends, you're my very best (Friends!) Friends!'
"What's your name?" Barney asked the next girl, a young brunette with a ponytail, wearing a red ascot, yellow shirt, and blue jeans, her big blue eyes shimmering.
"Jenny." The smile was still plastered on her face.
"Jane?" He misunderstood.
"Jenny." She said her name again.
"Jennifer?" He did it again, now obviously teasing the girl.
"Jenny!" She raised her voice but never stopped smiling.
"What does it mean?" Barney inquired.
"It's Hebrew for 'gracious'." She responded coyly.
"I can see by your outfit that you are a stable girl." He couldn't help but notice.
"Yes, I am." Her tone was full of sincerity.
The host came back to the horse. "What do you think of our farm girl?"
"I think she is so beautiful it's incomparable." The stallion responded with an air of chivalry. Jenny's smile widened.
"Are you ready?" Barney asked him.
"From the day I was born." Black Beauty declared with the same voice as before.
"Now that is a bold stallion." Murmured the amused host before he directed the equine to stand right in front of the stable girl. "Look at her right on the eyes and give your best pick-up line."
Beauty went on to do just that. "You ain't no Napoleon Bonaparte, but you conquered a good chunk of my heart."
Barney whistled, impressed. The crowd cheered, the horse's friends causing most of the noise. "Beauty!" "Beauty!" "Beauty!"
"Well, Jenny. What do you think?" The Casanova asked curiously.
"Good." She flashed her smile. "Very" She whispered under her breath.
"Good enough to deserve a peck or a kiss?"
"Yes." She glowed.
He turned to Black Beauty and gave him a free pass for him to come to Jenny. "You may now kiss the bride."
Jenny advanced on the black stallion and immediately slammed her lips onto his, engulfing them in a passionate kiss as she wrapped her arm around his head to caress his mane. Romantic song started playing in the background while the couple was making out. Beauty nuzzled closer to Jenny, in turn, the latter started trickling his dark grayish hair.
That was when Barney realized something was wrong.
"W-w-what?! What is it?" He asked the audience.
"It didn't record!" Everyone shouted.
"The camera didn't get it?" He tried to confirm what was the problem.
"NO!"
The pair had ceased mouth contact when the host came to them. "Excuse me, do you think you guys could do it again, just so we can record it?"
"Sure." Jenny responded without a single drop of hesitation.
"Every time there is a problem with the camera and they have to repeat the scene."
Beauty and Jenny pressed their lips together once again, the farm girl locking her arm around the equine's head as if it belonged there. They gazed lovingly into each other's eyes as they kissed with gusto, leaning and nuzzling on a tight embrace full of passion. The same romantic ballad playing for them.
A/N: Best Jetlag movie, it's not even a competition.
Monkey See, Monkey Do
Madagascar beaches, beautiful females, and a man-orangutan duo trying to find a first kiss for the latter.
"What's your name?" Barney asked a female gorilla.
"Emily Rose." She said.
The duo stopped dead on their tracks.
I AM LUCIFER, THE DEVIL IN THE FLESH!
The image of a girl speaking with the collective voices of many demons as her eyes turned dark-black, followed by a terrifying scream of despair, put the pair on the edge.
-Scene Cut-
"Are you single?" Louie came forth.
"And going to stay that way." She declared pointedly.
"You don't know how to talk to a female." Barney upbraided the King of the Bandar-log. Then he came to Terk. "You gotta be polite, like this: if your boobs were a blowhorn, your neighbors would never sleep because of me." He flashed a smile towards her. "You liked it?"
"No." Her deadpan tone caused the Casanova to double-take;
Louie assumed from there. "What are you doing here in Madagascar?"
"Getting publicity for a commercial." She responded.
"You have 30 seconds to make a commercial about yourself." Barney dared her.
"Mangani, brown eyes, 150 gallons of tight alone." Terk described herself at break-neck speed.
The orangutan grinned. "Good kisser?"
"Darn right!"
"Show me."
A/N: "For the first, King Louie hooking up with someone in this series!"
A smiling Terk let her tongue out to lick Louie's lips before she sealed his mouth with hers. The orangutan's arms curled around the gorilla's head, holding her closer while she liked his gums before diving deeper to reach his wisdom teeth, then his tonsils. His hand went up to explore the tuft of hair on top of her head. He focused on her lower lip. sucking on it erotically with his pucker before doing the same to her Upper lip. Terk moaned when their mouths locked again, her tongue coming to wrestle against the King's own. They fully wrapped their arms around each other and the monarch dipped the female before he pulled back; Terk sucked on his lower lip as they eventually ceased mouth contact.
Barney was quick to join the orangutan's side, congratulating him with a side hug and a handshake then asking for details. Terk was wiggling her tongue in and out to the camera.
A/N: What do you think about this couple?
"Ash, I am your father"
A young-looking woman gazed out of the window. The bright July sun was dancing across the waves, and the sounds of the beachgoers partying on the coastline below filled her bedroom. But it is not the summery seascape the mother sees. Mrs. Delia Ketchum looks out of the window to her past.
20 years ago, when she was but a teenager, Delia dreamed of becoming both a model and a Pokémon Trainer under the tutelage of Professor Samuel Oak. She had just finished her school year and was helping in her mother's restaurant, Pallet House, always working with a happy smile on her face.
And, from the windows of the establishment, she always got to see that rebel crossing the asphalt trail with his motorbike.
He was a poser, imposing, always with a gleaming pompadour on his head, a cigarette in the corner of his mouth, and his motorcycle cutting across the horizons at sunset. They meet for the first time when he came over to the restaurant at lunch break. From there, every single day, he would come back at mealtime, even though he would often just ask for a glass of water. He and Delia got closer, started going out together, until the inevitable happened and they fell in love, eventually getting married.
From their union, she got pregnant with his son, which they decided to name Ash, Ash Ketchum of Pallet Town.
However, the townfolk weren't very accepting.
One night, tragedy struck, Delia was cornered, still with her unborn child, and left battered on the ground. When the father arrived and found his wife in that state, her barely audible words with which she begged him not to do it were the only thing that stopped him from leveling the entire town to the ground. To him, his wife's kindness was her most admirable trait. So he gave up, on everything; he left Pallet Town after using his powers to alter the memories of everyone so they would forget he even existed and left her in the local hospital.
10 years later, he heard of a promising new trainer from Pallet, a young boy called Ash Ketchum. He immediately returned, meeting the boy and his companions at the outskirts of the town. After interacting with his son, he left for his old house. There, he was stranged by his wife treating him with complete naturality, letting him in and making his favorite meal, which he hadn't eaten in a decade. But that was nothing compared to the surprise of seeing his son looking exactly like one of his kind, could this be the result of his hybrid genes? As if he wasn't already overloading for being in the presence of his wife and son, long thought to be dead.
No... it was merely a very good costume.
From that day forth, he stayed with them. Not caring that she couldn't remember him, just happy to be by the side of his family, even with his son constantly coming and going in his Journey to be a Master. There truly was no place like home.
Delia heard the rattling of a key in the lock of the hotel room, turned to the door...
And smiled at the sight of the inwardly curved jaw of her husband.
She grabbed the bouquet he had brought for her, inhaled the sweet smell of the flowers before putting it on the table, and crouching down to swoop him up for a kiss. They embraced each other in a tight embrace, Mimie reached for her scalp while she enveloped her arms around him, losing themselves in the lop-lock. Husband and wife broke away to lean on each other's shoulder, enjoying the feeling of each other's warmth for the first in years. Delia gasped when the pokemon lowered his head to target her neck, sending electric surges across her body with every nip. She pulled him away to the table so she could take off her blouse, revealing the two-piece bikini she had brought specially for this vacation and giving him a great show of her curvaceous body, champion of several contests. She hugged him again, moving him to the bed, and dipping back onto their intimate kiss.
Ever since she regained her memories, Delia had never been happier.