Chapter 5: Submission
Disclaimer: Square Enix owns Final Fantasy VII
Cloud's POV:
That night… I couldn't sleep. I cursed myself as she sat by my side crying so miserably. I found myself wanting to wrap around her trembling shoulders to tell her that everything would be alright… That there was nothing to cry about… Yet, I did nothing… I had lain there, still as a log, pretending to be asleep and done nothing as she sobbed herself to sleep. Her sobs cutting through my heart as sharp and as easily as a knife.
I wanted to hold her… Why hadn't I done that? Why did I want to do that? And… Why did I feel that way?
"Cloud…"
He stared at his guilt streaked palms, clenched and unclenched them, placed them on the sun warmed surface of the bench then clasped them together. I should be happy to see her so miserable… What's wrong with me? He felt like standing on the edge of a cliff and screaming his lungs out in frustration.
"Cloud?" Tifa prodded her pretty face fraught with worry. "What's wrong? You're daydreaming again… You've been doing that a lot lately… You're not coming done with something are you?" Immediately, Cloud felt bad. Tifa had looked so beautiful that morning… With those long legs, lively hazel eyes and long chestnut hair framing her face like an angel's halo… He had sought out the courage and suggested a stroll in the school gardens with Tifa during break time… He had chosen the spot… He had approached her, and yet now he was the one who was acting completely out of place. Now Cloud felt as if he had used her to distract him from thoughts about Aeris to help him relax.
That sucked. And since when did Tifa become my means of distraction?
"Sorry…" He whispered, his voice coming out slightly monotonous and dull. "Sorry." He repeated again before resting his forehead against his clasped hands, getting completely lost in thought again. The sweet fragrance of cherry blossoms wafting around him, springtime's natural perfume managed to sooth his troubled mind slightly but not completely.
"…" Tifa just watched him quietly before she stared off at the cherry trees, watching the pretty pink petals fluttering, covering the grass in a lovely pink carpet. "It's so beautiful..." She added smilingly as she flushed a lovely peach shade at Cloud. Her smile fading slightly as he continued to stare at the pavement listlessly. Tifa sighed dramatically and patted his back. "Don't worry so much… Or you'll age faster than you should."
"Uh…" He mumbled non committedly in response, not quite hearing.
Tifa smiled slightly and gently rocked her heels. "…You know… Cloud…" She began, looking over at him shyly.
"Hmmm…?"
She reached out a slender hand and tugged gently at his sleeve, getting his full attention. "I… I've always wanted to tell you… That… I… Err…" Tifa mumbled shyly, her face turning a brilliant beet red. "Erm… And you… That is… Erm…" She stuttered, fidgeting nervously with the edge of her short skirt before she took a deep breath and looked straight into his eyes.
"I really… Like you…"
Oh Gaia…
Her voice echoed silently through the wind, Cloud could hear the rustle of leaves and petals as they flitted across the pavement before his feet. He closed his eyes slowly and felt the sun against his cheeks, the breeze caressing his face, lifting the stray strands of his blonde hair over his face as her words reverberated sweetly in his ears… All of a sudden… He felt… Free.
"Thank you… I like you too…"
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Aeris's POV:
It's about time I ended this…
Aeris waited out in the hallway just outside the library. The spot had become an unspoken agreed meeting place for the two after school… After everyone had gone home… So that there would be no witnesses. Aeris sighed and looked at her watch on her slim wrist. Cloud was half an hour late… It just wasn't like him… He was always on time. Maybe Tifa…Aeris shook her head from the thought. Stop it Aeris. What did it matter if he was with Tifa…? He likes her. So it's only natural… Even so… Where is he?
Finally, just when she was deciding to walk back home on her own, she spotted a blonde head bobbing slowly down the corridor. He had his head down, his blue eyes darkened to a pensive navy like a sailor lost at sea… He was staring listlessly at his feet as they took one step forward at a time, dragging them as if they were weighed down with lead. "Cloud…" She half whispered half sighed in relief, a small smile breaking out on her soft features, just glad to finally see him. He raised his golden head at the sound of her voice and looked straight at her. Her smile faded… His face was solemn, his facial muscles taut. Then he looked down again, not daring to meet her eyes.
"I…" Cloud started, fidgeting slightly, stuffing his hands into his pants pockets and looking down at his shoes uneasily. "Tifa… Confessed her feelings to me." He whispered carefully, finally looking up.
She… Did? Her relief vanished and in her shock, her books thumped to the floor, her stack of papers spreading across the floor like fallen leaves. They stood there, staring at each other or what seemed like an eternity before Aeris looked down and averted her eyes away from his not sure of what to say or do… Yet her conscience nagged… It's about time I end this…
"Say something!"
Cloud dashed towards her and pressed his lips against hers hard in a passionate kiss, his tongue plunging sensuously into her mouth and twirling with her own. Aeris found her green eyes fluttering close in pleasure, moaning softly as his warm fingers tangled through her hair as he deepened the kiss desperately.
Then, as suddenly as he had started, Cloud broke the kiss and fell to his knees, his arms wrapped around her slim waist. He was trembling so hard… Aeris could feel the shiver of his warm fingers through the thin red cotton of her blouse. She stroked the soft gold strands, a gentle gesture that urged him to stand up. But Cloud held on tighter, burying his face in her stomach… Shaking… As if he was afraid to let go.
"I'm pathetic…" She heard him whisper painfully, the raw agony laced in his wavering voice. His hands stroked her back gently, as if to comfort. "Now that things have turned out like this…" Aeris' heart caught in her throat, the pain and helplessness silencing her to a silent stupor… Yet, nothing could have prepared her for what came after…
The next sentence he whispered cut through her heart and into her soul.
"You're not the only one at fault…" His voice was so kind… And held no malice nor anger… And yet, at the same time… Such remorse. His eyes obscured ever so carefully from her view by the golden fan of his bangs.
I…
Never meant for things to become this way…
Aeris took a sharp breath and felt the walls she had erected around her heart crumbling away to dust. His words held the yolk of a thousand daggers and stabbed every single recess of her heart… Cloud's pain was her pain… Her conscience was killing her… The words she wanted to tell him were stuck somewhere in her stomach.
I never meant to hurt you…
Please… Don't look like that…
It hurt so much… Her heart ached so much… She almost couldn't bear it…
…If…
You're last…
"I'm sorry…" Aeris found herself finally choking out, closing her eyes and spilling the tears over. A teardrop splash onto Cloud's head and dripped off a lock of golden fringe as he looked up at her curiously. His eyes bright with unspilled tears…
Act to me…
Is to look at me with warmth in your eyes and kiss me…
"I'm so… Sorry…" She sobbed uncontrollably. Aeris raised her hands to her face and rubbed the treacherous tears away viciously, but the river was stubborn and continued to trickle. Cloud reached forward gently and cupped her cheeks in his palms, looking at her gently, his eyes soft and bruised, brimming with kindness and warmth…
I will…
Looking straight into her teary eyes, Cloud closed his eyes and pressed his lips gently to hers. Kissing her gently, softly, holding her close… Aeris shut her eyes tight and melted in the warmth of the moment, the kiss salty yet so sweet… She was dizzy, delirious… Deliriously happy…
Let you go…
"Thank you…" Aeris half whispered half gasped gratefully as she pulled away painfully, panting softly, etching every intricate detail of his last kiss into her memory. The supple softness of his lips… The searing heat of his touch… Slowly, Aeris took a careful, deep breath to stop her voice from wavering. "You know… Cloud?" She whispered, her voice soft and sad as she looked straight into those beautiful confused blue orbs and gently wiping away the tears from her eyes. "I really do…. Love you."
And she ran. The last image of Cloud kneeling there with his eyes widening like saucers was the last that filled her vision as she turned and ran. With every stride as the sun tucked itself in with the radiant night blanket of stars, she made a solemn promise to herself… That she wouldn't cry… That she would be happy for Cloud and Tifa… That she would no longer chain him down…
Good luck…
Because it hurts me so much…
To be able to let you go… To Tifa's arms…
She would always be alone…
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OOoOooooOOOoOooo…Drama… :p
I updated this chapter as fast as I could to make up for lost time… So hope you guys liked it! As you can see…. Guilt has pushed Aeris gracefully away…Tifa has confessed her feelings and Cloud is now free. And as if things couldn't get any messier… Aeris finally tells Cloud how SHE feels… :p Don't you just hate me?
Next up is the final chapter of "Please Smile At Me! What will happen next?
Shouts To!
samuraix85: Sniffles… Thank you! Thank you! glomps you
Beeria: I still feel really disappointed in myself that I couldn't use your idea… Mostly because I couldn't decide which version I should push Yuffie in. One of my favourite ideas in the end was introducing Yuffie as Cloud's SISTER, and that she and Cloud have a… Er HEM… History together. After that Cloud backs away but Yuffie still mistakes that brotherly feelings she has for Cloud as love and etc etc etc… But as you can see it went so drama that I later realized that I had actually came up with a completely new story altogether! Headache So hopefully when "Voice of Submission" comes out, it will do the version I wanted to write in for you some justice… :p
Wa… You update so fast I don't know where to start and where to continue reading! stress Not that I'm complaining of course…
Stormless: Ha ha… True true… Even though it's Cleris, I wasn't quite sure how the Aeris fans would take it seeing that I've decided to write her in such a twisted light fueled of course by my demented mind See see! Option 2 is out:p
Blade: Ah well… Couldn't be helped… I can't have Aeris being like a total bitch forever ya:p
LastCetra: Ha ha… That's ok… I'm not that calculative… :p Nonetheless, it's great to see you again! glomps
Foi: Yes yes… So sorry for the wait… URGH… Uni is killing me… Crazy professors, assignments up and due, upcoming projects to be researched and submitted… collapses on the floor and convulses foaming at the mouth Ha ha… Best of luck to you too!
Starsylie: Will do my best!
Oddishness: Yay! You're back! kisses you senseless Eh heh heh heh… True true… Wonder what Cloud's mom thinks of all this… :p
Alantie MistaniuHa ha… No worries there… There are 2 more chapters to go before this story ends… As for the ending… Ha ha… well… It's a Cleris fic ya?